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(NBC Washington)   Good news, everybody. The NFL has finished reviewing all 650,000 emails collected during its Washington Football Team investigation and can now declare that Jon Gruden was the only racist employed in their organization. No, you still can't read them   (nbcwashington.com) divider line
    More: Followup, National Football League Players Association, Oakland Raiders, league personnel, Monday Night Football, Tampa Bay Buccaneers, Jon Gruden, Raheem Morris, Washington Football Team  
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1015 clicks; posted to Main » and Sports » on 19 Oct 2021 at 1:42 PM (5 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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2021-10-19 1:20:58 PM  
Well, I'm convinced. The NFL has never swept things under the rug before. Their word is good enough for me.
 
2021-10-19 1:27:00 PM  
They probably don't want us to read them because we'll be jealous and riddled with envy over how completely free from prejudice their executives are. We'll each individually look at ourselves in the mirror and say, "This is it. This is the best I can be. No matter how hard I try, I will never live up to the high standards of highly placed individuals in the NFL. I will never be as committed to completely freeing myself from bias toward gender, race, sexuality, or religion as they are. I will simply never be as good a person as those who run American football. There's really no point in trying anymore." They're trying to spare us that sort of soul-crushing realization, and maybe we should be thanking them for it.
 
2021-10-19 1:42:56 PM  
Well, I for one am deflated now.
 
2021-10-19 1:45:14 PM  
<surejan.gif>
 
2021-10-19 1:46:39 PM  
Before I fully read the headline I though this was about the officiating.
 
2021-10-19 1:47:15 PM  
Someone will leak them. Then the Justice Society of Twitter will make them public. The NFL will be up ended.
 
2021-10-19 1:48:04 PM  
They learned from the best:

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-10-19 1:48:06 PM  
Whew, that's a relief.
 
2021-10-19 1:50:09 PM  
Full release demanded by players' union in 3... 2...
 
2021-10-19 1:50:20 PM  
preview.redd.itView Full Size
 
2021-10-19 1:50:49 PM  
I'm assuming if we got to see the contents of all the emails there would be an extremely justified player walkout on a massive scale.
 
2021-10-19 1:52:36 PM  
Well, thank god. I was really scared for a minute that there might be racism in the NFL.
 
2021-10-19 1:53:31 PM  

Aetre: Full release demanded by players' union in 3... 2...


They did that last week
 
2021-10-19 1:53:38 PM  
Well they got the guy out they wanted out, I guess it's time to move on.
 
2021-10-19 1:55:13 PM  

SuperChuck: Aetre: Full release demanded by players' union in 3... 2...

They did that last week


Huh. Welp, this isn't exactly meeting that demand, so... Probably coming again anyway.
 
2021-10-19 1:55:31 PM  
Jon Gruden, Lamb of God, you take away the sins of the world, have mercy on us.
 
2021-10-19 1:56:37 PM  
Boss: Steve.......i need to check our emails for some.......words.....
Steve: Yeah, no problem....what are we looking for?
Boss: OK....lets start with....i dunno....the n word....
Steve: Dude, i'm not typing that man, i'm logged in with my account....
Boss: Ok.....what about the R word
Steve: JESUS CHRIST MAN MY COUSIN HAS DOWN'S
Boss: man......ok.......Midget? You know any short people?
Steve: No, fark them.....here we  go....select * where contains 'MIDGET'
Steve: Hmm.....42,000 results.....all scouts too....i know those guys are assholes but....wow....
Boss: No there is a junior league called Midget Football
Steve: Well that is insensitive
Boss: Its not actual midgets.....kids....but......hey....do you think midgets can throw a football?
Steve: I don't see why not....probably not setting any yardage records or anything....but sure...
Boss: OK we are done here....we didn't find anything.....and i have to go talk to the league about a great new division i just came up with an idea for.....
 
2021-10-19 1:57:43 PM  
We've investigated ourselves and found wrongdoing by this individual only. Everyone else is clean

Some sports radio host mentioned that the NFL probably had a ton of blackmail material on a lot of people because of this, and they'll only implicate you if you go against the almighty NFL shield

It's plausible Goodell is holding some stuff back to have leverage over some people
 
2021-10-19 1:58:16 PM  

proteus_b: Jon Gruden, Lamb of God, you take away the sins of the world, have mercy on us.


And the three wise men looked out and saw a bright light, for lo, there was a fluorescent sign visible from the highway, denoting the location of a Hooters.
 
2021-10-19 1:58:26 PM  

LineNoise: Boss: man......ok.......Midget? You know any short people?


si.comView Full Size
 
2021-10-19 2:00:28 PM  
Also i intentionally flubbed that SQL statement because the fark editor shot me back a list of users under 5 feet tall when i wrote it correctly.
 
2021-10-19 2:02:40 PM  
This story is 4 days out of date and the AP has already been torched for  publishing this, especially after the emails between Allen and the NFL's General Counsel, the guy overseeing the investigation that turned up these emails.   Not only did the GC tell him he was SURE there was nothing to these allegations, BEFORE the investigation, but there is some really racist shiat in there  not the least of which was their banter about DC's attempts to attract Latino fans and how there would be a lot less of them after the Wall
 
2021-10-19 2:04:12 PM  
Very yes. Because no one read any of Gruden's emails, ever.
 
2021-10-19 2:06:06 PM  

Magorn: not the least of which was their banter about DC's attempts to attract Latino fans and how there would be a lot less of them after the Wall


I think that is kind of a strecth if you call it racist on its own without context.

Less latin american immigrants would equate to less latin american people immigrating to the DC area, which would equate to less fans from a group they found desirable.

I mean it just sounds like they did some math.
 
2021-10-19 2:06:55 PM  
I would think that there would be a lot of sensitive information in those emails such as personnel and playbook information.
 
2021-10-19 2:11:06 PM  
Oof. That is not an enviable task.

"Spam.. Spam... Bill for Secret Family. Spam, Spam, Recruitment letter, Spam, Bellichick fan club, Spam..."
 
2021-10-19 2:13:37 PM  

TheGreatGazoo: I would think that there would be a lot of sensitive information in those emails such as personnel and playbook information.


Pro sports teams aren't doing their scouting via email and passing around playbooks in pdf over it.

There are dedicated systems for such. Maybe you get someone who is sloppy and drops a name they have interest in if you read every single email, but teams take that shiat really seriously.

Also other teams would treat getting that information really seriously and report it, because they would want the same to happen if it did to them. That stuff can really influence sports betting, so there is certainly a payday in it, and they would want to make sure whoever did it was nailed to the wall.
 
2021-10-19 2:19:26 PM  
I wonder how many people and how long it took to get through all of those e-mails.
 
2021-10-19 2:20:12 PM  
Whatever makes the redskins look bad, and therefore Snyder more of a buffoon, I'm for.
 
2021-10-19 2:26:27 PM  

maudibjr: Whatever makes the redskins look bad, and therefore Snyder more of a buffoon, I'm for.


For some reason, I got in trouble for a sign that I made for my door at work.   With a list of alternate names for the team as Snyder really seemed to wanted a racist name.

It's amazing how much alliterative racism you can come up with when you have 'capital', 'washington', 'district', and 'beltway' to work with.

/people seemed to prefer 'capital crackers'
//but that might've been because it was likely the least offensive of the bunch
 
2021-10-19 2:27:50 PM  
Nice Farking Lie
 
2021-10-19 2:28:59 PM  
My Bortles/Gabbert hentai that I sent to Shad is safe, then.
 
2021-10-19 2:32:42 PM  

kdawg7736: I wonder how many people and how long it took to get through all of those e-mails.


It's similar to how the State Department said it would take months to go through the 30,000+ emails Hillary turned over to them, but the 30,000+ she deleted were gone through just by her own personal lawyers and they quickly (within days or hours) determined all of them were a big nothingburger and could be deleted.
 
2021-10-19 2:34:27 PM  
I can't recall the guy's name but there was a player who ruthlessly beat his girlfriend in an elevator and it was caught on cam. The NFL reviewed and said 'all is fine he can play' and tried to keep the tape buried. The tape came out and we saw a full grown and beyond physically fit man pummel a woman with no mercy.

I'm not going to feel bad for taking their investigation with a grain of salt. There is no farking way there was no one else.
 
2021-10-19 2:34:52 PM  
if you believe the NFL then i have some dry land in the Florida everglades for sale excellent for building!
 
2021-10-19 2:38:50 PM  
Gruden wasn't employed by the NFL when the emails were sent.

Maybe Gruden was the only ESPN employee who emailed the NFL who is an idiot?
 
2021-10-19 2:40:44 PM  

kdawg7736: I wonder how many people and how long it took to get through all of those e-mails.


[ctrl]-f
 
2021-10-19 2:48:09 PM  

rudemix: I can't recall the guy's name but there was a player who ruthlessly beat his girlfriend in an elevator and it was caught on cam. The NFL reviewed and said 'all is fine he can play' and tried to keep the tape buried. The tape came out and we saw a full grown and beyond physically fit man pummel a woman with no mercy.

I'm not going to feel bad for taking their investigation with a grain of salt. There is no farking way there was no one else.


That would be Kareem Hunt. Former kc chief currently with the Cleveland Browns.
 
2021-10-19 2:48:54 PM  

kzspam: rudemix: I can't recall the guy's name but there was a player who ruthlessly beat his girlfriend in an elevator and it was caught on cam. The NFL reviewed and said 'all is fine he can play' and tried to keep the tape buried. The tape came out and we saw a full grown and beyond physically fit man pummel a woman with no mercy.

I'm not going to feel bad for taking their investigation with a grain of salt. There is no farking way there was no one else.

That would be Kareem Hunt. Former kc chief currently with the Cleveland Browns.


Or it could be Ray Rice.
 
2021-10-19 2:58:33 PM  

SuperChuck: kzspam: rudemix: I can't recall the guy's name but there was a player who ruthlessly beat his girlfriend in an elevator and it was caught on cam. The NFL reviewed and said 'all is fine he can play' and tried to keep the tape buried. The tape came out and we saw a full grown and beyond physically fit man pummel a woman with no mercy.

I'm not going to feel bad for taking their investigation with a grain of salt. There is no farking way there was no one else.

That would be Kareem Hunt. Former kc chief currently with the Cleveland Browns.

Or it could be Ray Rice.


Yeah, Hunt's was in a hotel hallway.
 
2021-10-19 2:59:39 PM  

kzspam: rudemix: I can't recall the guy's name but there was a player who ruthlessly beat his girlfriend in an elevator and it was caught on cam. The NFL reviewed and said 'all is fine he can play' and tried to keep the tape buried. The tape came out and we saw a full grown and beyond physically fit man pummel a woman with no mercy.

I'm not going to feel bad for taking their investigation with a grain of salt. There is no farking way there was no one else.

That would be Kareem Hunt. Former kc chief currently with the Cleveland Browns.


Wrong. But so many beatings, who can keep track?
 
2021-10-19 3:00:28 PM  

SuperChuck: kzspam: rudemix: I can't recall the guy's name but there was a player who ruthlessly beat his girlfriend in an elevator and it was caught on cam. The NFL reviewed and said 'all is fine he can play' and tried to keep the tape buried. The tape came out and we saw a full grown and beyond physically fit man pummel a woman with no mercy.

I'm not going to feel bad for taking their investigation with a grain of salt. There is no farking way there was no one else.

That would be Kareem Hunt. Former kc chief currently with the Cleveland Browns.

Or it could be Ray Rice.


Or was it Ray Lewis? No, wait, he just killed a guy.
 
2021-10-19 3:00:52 PM  
Per Adam Schefter
 
2021-10-19 3:01:41 PM  

WhiskeySticks: SuperChuck: kzspam: rudemix: I can't recall the guy's name but there was a player who ruthlessly beat his girlfriend in an elevator and it was caught on cam. The NFL reviewed and said 'all is fine he can play' and tried to keep the tape buried. The tape came out and we saw a full grown and beyond physically fit man pummel a woman with no mercy.

I'm not going to feel bad for taking their investigation with a grain of salt. There is no farking way there was no one else.

That would be Kareem Hunt. Former kc chief currently with the Cleveland Browns.

Or it could be Ray Rice.

Or was it Ray Lewis? No, wait, he just killed a guy.


Come on now. He probably only watched while his friends killed a guy.
 
2021-10-19 3:04:17 PM  

rudemix: I can't recall the guy's name but there was a player who ruthlessly beat his girlfriend in an elevator and it was caught on cam. The NFL reviewed and said 'all is fine he can play' and tried to keep the tape buried. The tape came out and we saw a full grown and beyond physically fit man pummel a woman with no mercy.


That was Ray Rice. His fiancée (now wife) was charged just the same because it was mutual combat.
 
2021-10-19 3:08:46 PM  

Oneiros: maudibjr: Whatever makes the redskins look bad, and therefore Snyder more of a buffoon, I'm for.

For some reason, I got in trouble for a sign that I made for my door at work.   With a list of alternate names for the team as Snyder really seemed to wanted a racist name.

It's amazing how much alliterative racism you can come up with when you have 'capital', 'washington', 'district', and 'beltway' to work with.

/people seemed to prefer 'capital crackers'
//but that might've been because it was likely the least offensive of the bunch


Back in college when the Houston Oilers were moving to Nashville a local paper had a 'Name the Team' online contest where the winner would win lifetime season tickets. I submitted 'Nashville Honkies' and the helmet design was going to be Elvis-style mutton chops... Needless to say I didn't win...
 
2021-10-19 3:16:59 PM  

iron_city_ap: Per Adam Schefter


And "Mr Editor"
 
2021-10-19 3:16:59 PM  
Whew, glad that's solved.
 
2021-10-19 3:30:47 PM  

SuperChuck: WhiskeySticks: SuperChuck: kzspam: rudemix: I can't recall the guy's name but there was a player who ruthlessly beat his girlfriend in an elevator and it was caught on cam. The NFL reviewed and said 'all is fine he can play' and tried to keep the tape buried. The tape came out and we saw a full grown and beyond physically fit man pummel a woman with no mercy.

I'm not going to feel bad for taking their investigation with a grain of salt. There is no farking way there was no one else.

That would be Kareem Hunt. Former kc chief currently with the Cleveland Browns.

Or it could be Ray Rice.

Or was it Ray Lewis? No, wait, he just killed a guy.

Come on now. He probably only watched while his friends killed a guy.


Hey man, that's not correct.  Be careful when spreading around misinformation like that.

It was _two_ guys who ended up dead.
 
2021-10-19 3:37:37 PM  
This whole episode reminds me of one of my former bosses who kept literally every work email he ever got.  Everything from the HR welcome and set up stuff to random "donuts in the conference room" messages.  In related news he was a total anal-retentive a-hole.
 
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