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(Zillow)   The listing claims it's not haunted, but it does have great bones   (zillow.com) divider line
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3205 clicks; posted to Main » on 15 Oct 2021 at 5:05 PM (7 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



47 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2021-10-15 4:49:21 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size

The front somewhat resembles the Myers' house from the original "Halloween" (1978)
 
2021-10-15 4:51:38 PM  
Oh, Michigan

*shutter*
 
2021-10-15 4:55:04 PM  
next to a church.

No.
Pay ME
 
2021-10-15 5:09:05 PM  
Google street view shows there is a free tv by the sidewalk!
 
2021-10-15 5:10:04 PM  
That is probably the most amusing realty listing I've ever seen.
 
2021-10-15 5:11:28 PM  
Uh.. gross. When the covering of the "Good bones" is that farking rotted out, I'm not sure the "Good bones" are "Good bones" anymore. I can smell that house just looking at it. It smells like black mold, must, and ammonia from the last meth-cook that happened in the wet ass basement.
 
2021-10-15 5:12:53 PM  
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I wonder why nobody wants to visit...
 
2021-10-15 5:14:38 PM  
So I guess after giving up on defeating He-Man, Skeletor went into real estate.
 
2021-10-15 5:14:39 PM  
$5k price increase? I'm out.
 
2021-10-15 5:14:43 PM  
Sarah Levy on the case.
 
2021-10-15 5:15:25 PM  
The trimwork in that house is rather nice, and hard to find these days.

That's about where the PRO list ends.
 
2021-10-15 5:15:49 PM  
5 bedrooms and only 1800 sq ft is the scary part. Can you even fit beds in them?
 
2021-10-15 5:16:38 PM  
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SOON

 
2021-10-15 5:17:00 PM  
That's not a haunted house. That's a human trafficker's house. It's the kitchen that makes it a sex trafficker's home, though.
 
2021-10-15 5:19:38 PM  

neongoats: Uh.. gross. When the covering of the "Good bones" is that farking rotted out, I'm not sure the "Good bones" are "Good bones" anymore. I can smell that house just looking at it. It smells like black mold, must, and ammonia from the last meth-cook that happened in the wet ass basement.


We bought a house like this years ago.

Once we opened up the walls and saw the extent of the rehab (NOT remodel) it needed we were praying for the sweet release of death.

We made a profit in the end but I live with my mom never EVER again.

/Could have burned it down and rebuilt for cheaper/less hassle
 
2021-10-15 5:20:25 PM  

blatz514: Google street view shows there is a free tv by the sidewalk!


Google street view shows it was occupied 2 years ago. Yikes.
 
2021-10-15 5:21:49 PM  

ANDizzleWI: neongoats: Uh.. gross. When the covering of the "Good bones" is that farking rotted out, I'm not sure the "Good bones" are "Good bones" anymore. I can smell that house just looking at it. It smells like black mold, must, and ammonia from the last meth-cook that happened in the wet ass basement.

We bought a house like this years ago.

Once we opened up the walls and saw the extent of the rehab (NOT remodel) it needed we were praying for the sweet release of death.

We made a profit in the end but I live with my mom never EVER again.

/Could have burned it down and rebuilt for cheaper/less hassle


Fark filters "zero out of ten" to "I live with my mom?"

That's a new one.
 
2021-10-15 5:23:12 PM  
And the local schools rate a 3/10, so not great schools.
Just another classic Fark/Zillow listing. Showing the best America has to offer.
 
2021-10-15 5:24:53 PM  

Bathia_Mapes: [Fark user image 592x253]
The front somewhat resembles the Myers' house from the original "Halloween" (1978)


No way!

*click*

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-10-15 5:26:26 PM  

farker99: And the local schools rate a 3/10, so not great schools.


The free candy vans circling the neighborhood would be a tip-off

/ Have friends in Muskegon
// But in the chic part of Muskegon
 
2021-10-15 5:29:19 PM  
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2021-10-15 5:33:32 PM  
encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.comView Full Size
 
2021-10-15 5:34:11 PM  
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I love this so much.
 
2021-10-15 5:35:33 PM  
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2021-10-15 5:38:59 PM  
A car you can buy for $75,000 new
automanager.blob.core.windows.netView Full Size


A house you can buy for $75,000

photos.zillowstatic.comView Full Size

And it's in Michigan.

/I'd rather live in a new Tesla, I guess, is what I'm saying.
 
2021-10-15 5:39:01 PM  
Not weird at all
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/daily bad drawing
 
2021-10-15 5:42:12 PM  
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2021-10-15 5:42:30 PM  

ANDizzleWI: neongoats: Uh.. gross. When the covering of the "Good bones" is that farking rotted out, I'm not sure the "Good bones" are "Good bones" anymore. I can smell that house just looking at it. It smells like black mold, must, and ammonia from the last meth-cook that happened in the wet ass basement.

We bought a house like this years ago.

Once we opened up the walls and saw the extent of the rehab (NOT remodel) it needed we were praying for the sweet release of death.

We made a profit in the end but I live with my mom never EVER again.

/Could have burned it down and rebuilt for cheaper/less hassle


Yeah, I owned an old house years ago. Since that's in Michigan and it gets damp/cold you can't even assume the bones are any good. You pull that lath/plaster off the wall and half of the wood is probably rotted.
 
2021-10-15 5:50:38 PM  
The listing states that there is "stunning woodwork" but the pictures don't really deliver on that promise.  Maybe the realtor is more easily stunned than I am.

...or maybe some woodwork fell on his/her head during a showing.
 
2021-10-15 5:53:58 PM  

Ganon D. Mire: [Fark user image 850x566]
I wonder why nobody wants to visit...


Michigan bootleg Skeletor is watching you masturbate
 
2021-10-15 5:54:12 PM  
75k? Tempted.
 
2021-10-15 5:54:38 PM  
LOL, "great bones" is code for "requires significant structural and electrical/plumbing work."

Plus, it's in Muskegon.

I already live in Oklahoma. Michigan isn't a step up. Pretty sure it's not even a lateral move.
 
2021-10-15 5:58:36 PM  
It'll get torched on Devil's Night.
 
2021-10-15 5:59:13 PM  
As per Google Street View:

Fark user imageView Full Size


The flat screen precariously balanced on the railing adds a classy touch.
 
2021-10-15 6:00:48 PM  

gopher321: As per Google Street View:

[Fark user image 850x542]

The flat screen precariously balanced on the railing adds a classy touch.


They look like a happy family.

I think that proves it's not a crack house.

It's a crack home.
 
2021-10-15 6:00:55 PM  
There is a weird sadness to drawing an entertainment center on your wall.
 
2021-10-15 6:19:20 PM  

Markoff_Cheney: There is a weird sadness to drawing an entertainment center on your wall.


Is there a single word to describe "weird sadness"? Maybe "melancholy"?

/just making conversation
 
2021-10-15 6:21:56 PM  
My place is kind of dilapidated spooky year round. I and the spiders have reached a mutual peace accord
 
2021-10-15 6:33:48 PM  
boston.cbslocal.comView Full Size
 
2021-10-15 6:49:36 PM  
Realtor missed a great opportunity to have David S. Pumpkins in the photos showing the house.
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2021-10-15 7:41:52 PM  

The5thElement: Realtor missed a great opportunity to have David S. Pumpkins in the photos showing the house.[Fark user image 400x600]


They couldn't handle it
 
2021-10-15 8:41:06 PM  
th.bing.comView Full Size

That can be disappointing.
 
2021-10-15 9:10:27 PM  
75k for that piece of shat..In Michigan? Not a chance..Sell it for 10k for the lot and whatever
can be salvaged ...That's about all I see t here..Otherwise that is a total joke to list something that's
falling apart, and in Michigan for that kind of price..You could probably buy an entire city block of lots in
Flint or Detroit for that price..
 
2021-10-15 9:16:25 PM  

Mr. Shabooboo: 75k for that piece of shat..In Michigan? Not a chance..Sell it for 10k for the lot and whatever
can be salvaged ...That's about all I see t here..Otherwise that is a total joke to list something that's
falling apart, and in Michigan for that kind of price..You could probably buy an entire city block of lots in
Flint or Detroit for that price..


And, yet, they increased the price by $5K. 🤷♀
 
2021-10-15 9:25:57 PM  

Mr. Shabooboo: You could probably buy an entire city block of lots in
Flint or Detroit for that price..


Because Michigan property values are equal over the entire state. Yep, you nailed it.

The house is in a cheap part of Muskegon. Here's another part:
i.ytimg.comView Full Size
 
2021-10-15 9:54:47 PM  

jaytkay: Mr. Shabooboo: You could probably buy an entire city block of lots in
Flint or Detroit for that price..

Because Michigan property values are equal over the entire state. Yep, you nailed it.

The house is in a cheap part of Muskegon. Here's another part:
[i.ytimg.com image 850x478]


There's no denying Michigan has beautiful places...But that house is not one of them....
 
2021-10-15 10:40:10 PM  
Say you bought it and magically rehabbed it. It would still be a former crack house in a shiat neighborhood.
 
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