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(WUSA9)   There is that saying about having a fool for a client, and then there's this genius admitting to felonies that weren't even charged   (wusa9.com) divider line
    More: Amusing, Law, Criminal justice, Judge, Punishment, Lawyer, Prison, Federal Bureau of Investigation, Judge Dredd  
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7290 clicks; posted to Main » and Politics » on 13 Oct 2021 at 10:01 AM (10 days ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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2021-10-13 9:05:27 AM  
Putting them judge's wife's into down as your emergency contact info... It's so profoundly dumb. And he thought it would get him out of jail magically.
 
2021-10-13 9:18:46 AM  
Rudy?
 
2021-10-13 9:21:25 AM  
It's become plainly clear that the only offense these judges care about is disrespecting the court itself.
 
2021-10-13 9:45:12 AM  
we don't need to hear more than a rattle out of him
 
2021-10-13 10:06:52 AM  
Pro se is Latin for "amateur say"
 
2021-10-13 10:09:47 AM  
Dumbest insurrection ever.
 
2021-10-13 10:09:53 AM  

This Is Bold Text: Putting them judge's wife's into down as your emergency contact info... It's so profoundly dumb. And he thought it would get him out of jail magically.


Lolwut.jpg
 
2021-10-13 10:11:09 AM  

Jake Havechek: Dumbest insurrection ever.


Dumbest insurrection ever SO FAR!
 
2021-10-13 10:12:05 AM  
There's a meme for that.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-10-13 10:12:22 AM  
I love that these brash "I CAN DO NO WRONG" types can't follow the first rule of interacting with law enforcement, mainly : STFU
 
2021-10-13 10:13:40 AM  
Shocked wasn't about Rudy.
 
2021-10-13 10:13:44 AM  

This Is Bold Text: Putting them judge's wife's into down as your emergency contact info... It's so profoundly dumb. And he thought it would get him out of jail magically.


Apparently it was smart enough to get the first judge recused.
 
2021-10-13 10:14:56 AM  
These are not the brightest tools in the drawer. We knew that on January 6th November 4th.
 
2021-10-13 10:15:03 AM  

This Is Bold Text: Putting them judge's wife's into down as your emergency contact info... It's so profoundly dumb. And he thought it would get him out of jail magically.


Was his opening argument a yo mamma joke with the judge and prosecutor's mothers in the punch line?
 
2021-10-13 10:15:13 AM  
He's the top attorney at Dunning & Kruger, PC.
 
2021-10-13 10:16:07 AM  
Alt title: White boys find out that being a moron is not a get-out-of-jail free card
 
2021-10-13 10:16:07 AM  

GardenWeasel: It's become plainly clear that the only offense these judges care about is disrespecting the court itself.


Only? No.

Will every judge in any courtroom hammer a defendant for that first, regardless of the original offense? Absolutely.

Does it seem to be happening a lot to these insurrectionists? Absolutely. Why?

Because they're morons.
 
2021-10-13 10:16:14 AM  
Welcome to re-publicans
 
2021-10-13 10:16:34 AM  
Most criminals are farking morons.
 
2021-10-13 10:16:49 AM  
These are the same people who think they can be a doctor after some "research". We see how that's going
 
2021-10-13 10:17:50 AM  

Northern: This Is Bold Text: Putting them judge's wife's into down as your emergency contact info... It's so profoundly dumb. And he thought it would get him out of jail magically.

Was his opening argument a yo mamma joke with the judge and prosecutor's mothers in the punch line?


see also:

allegedly calling a probation officer's mother

damson!

/but was she any good
 
2021-10-13 10:18:17 AM  
Assistant U.S. Attorney Mona Furst got Fellows to admit - under oath - that he had climbed into the Capitol through a broken window without police permission, that he had used the previous judge's wife's contact information to try to get him removed from the case and that he had missed court-ordered mental health and drug testing appointments.

This is the kind of thing prosecutors dream about. Your average criminal isn't usually all that bright, but most of them aren't this profoundly stupid.
 
2021-10-13 10:19:18 AM  
More and more, I get the impression that a Venn diagram of the insurrectionists and Mensa members would just be look like oo.
 
2021-10-13 10:19:27 AM  

Geotpf: Most criminals are farking morons.


It's impressive how idiotic he is, isn't it.

But if he were too smart to say all that stuff he would've been smart enough to not be at the Capitol invasion in the first place.
 
2021-10-13 10:19:31 AM  
Nice kid glove treatment. No additional charges after all that *and* wasting the court's time.
 
2021-10-13 10:19:36 AM  

Mambo Bananapatch: This Is Bold Text: Putting them judge's wife's into down as your emergency contact info... It's so profoundly dumb. And he thought it would get him out of jail magically.

Apparently it was smart enough to get the first judge recused.


Exactly. But I guess you run out of road when you encounter a judge that doesn't want to recuse.
 
2021-10-13 10:20:34 AM  

NOLAhd: Assistant U.S. Attorney Mona Furst got Fellows to admit - under oath - that he had climbed into the Capitol through a broken window without police permission, that he had used the previous judge's wife's contact information to try to get him removed from the case and that he had missed court-ordered mental health and drug testing appointments.

This is the kind of thing prosecutors dream about. Your average criminal isn't usually all that bright, but most of them aren't this profoundly stupid.


I wouldn't go that far.  But most of them have an attorney who will scream bloody murder when the prosecutor gets going.  This guy had just his own mouth to stop him.
 
2021-10-13 10:21:46 AM  

Geotpf: Most criminals Trumpers are farking morons.


ftfy
 
2021-10-13 10:21:55 AM  

NOLAhd: Assistant U.S. Attorney Mona Furst got Fellows to admit - under oath - that he had climbed into the Capitol through a broken window without police permission, that he had used the previous judge's wife's contact information to try to get him removed from the case and that he had missed court-ordered mental health and drug testing appointments.

This is the kind of thing prosecutors dream about. Your average criminal isn't usually all that bright, but most of them aren't this profoundly stupid.


And all of the things the judge told him before representing himself and testifying on his own behalf were purposely stated to him in the court record so he cannot ever argue that he didn't know what he was about to do to himself. He's just done.
 
2021-10-13 10:25:49 AM  

Monocultured: Nice kid glove treatment. No additional charges after all that *and* wasting the court's time.


There was nothing about no added charges.  A judge does not issue charges.  That is for a grand jury.  And the prosecutor just got sworn evidence for a grand jury.  Actual courts do not work on the speed of a Law & Order episode.  That people were not lined up and shot before the first commercial break is not "kid glove treatment", it's pretty normal procedure.  It is not uncommon for a trial to start two years after the inciting incident at the federal level.  What you think is delicate handling is almost reckless sprinting for the federal court system.
 
2021-10-13 10:26:16 AM  

Geotpf: Most criminalsrebublicans are farking morons.


ah hell...you had it right the first time.  the terms are interchangeable.  Well on you!
 
2021-10-13 10:26:16 AM  
So much white privilege.
The "justice" system is bending over backwards to be gentle with these traitors.
 
2021-10-13 10:26:56 AM  
The other insurrectionists should get him to represent them too.
 
2021-10-13 10:28:09 AM  

This Is Bold Text: Putting them judge's wife's into down as your emergency contact info... It's so profoundly dumb. And he thought it would get him out of jail magically.


seriously, what was this guy thinking?

"your honor, I thought annoying your family would result in a lighter judgement against me"
 
2021-10-13 10:28:49 AM  
When the fantasy lives of these types of farking morons, the type of farking idiot who would snatch your shiat in Middle School and then say 'possession is 9/8ths of the law! The law is on my side!' crash up against the real world we all live in. This farking idiot's ideas and notions of law are laughable as fark and would be hysterical if there weren't thousands more like him being wound up by the GQP hype machine which doesn't just include their bought and paid for media but also their elected leaders. He should get the long drop with a short rope.
 
2021-10-13 10:28:55 AM  
"In charging documents, prosecutors say Fellows entered the Capitol through a broken window and wound up smoking marijuana in Sen. Jeff Merkley's (D-OR) office."

Fark user imageView Full Size


OMG, the ads were right. THE ADS WERE RIGHT!!!!!11!1ONE!
 
2021-10-13 10:29:00 AM  
i.imgur.comView Full Size
 
2021-10-13 10:29:44 AM  
Last month, Fellows asked McFadden to allow him to represent himself pro se in his case - saying he had spent the previous two weeks in the D.C. Jail's law library and determined that was what he wanted.

I'm not sure he opened any books while in that library, but ee must think think lawyer a quite dumb for taking years to learn what he did in two weeks.
 
2021-10-13 10:30:40 AM  

Begoggle: So much white privilege.
The "justice" system is bending over backwards to be gentle with these traitors.


No.  This is pretty much the pace of the federal courts.  They are not Usain Bolt, but Flabby McWaddlestein.  You've just never watched them grind through things before.  If the cops don't light you up at the scene, you will grow old finding out how the feds define "Speedy Trial".  The feds' philosophy is that the US will be here long after you are dust, so they can take their time and fark you properly.
 
2021-10-13 10:31:40 AM  
A "constitutional lawyer" told him to wrap his cell phone in tin foil?

That was my favorite part.

Until the part where they tossed him back in the slammer.

That was the best part. ^_^
 
2021-10-13 10:31:43 AM  
This is not community college where you get a pat on the back 🤣🤣
 
2021-10-13 10:33:17 AM  
What is so unsurprising, yet leaves me utterly gobsmacked is the confidence of the mediocre this guy displays. I have the feeling he's been a royal pain in the arse who has been allowed to coast for his entire life.
 
2021-10-13 10:33:47 AM  

phalamir: Monocultured: Nice kid glove treatment. No additional charges after all that *and* wasting the court's time.

There was nothing about no added charges.  A judge does not issue charges.  That is for a grand jury.  And the prosecutor just got sworn evidence for a grand jury.  Actual courts do not work on the speed of a Law & Order episode.  That people were not lined up and shot before the first commercial break is not "kid glove treatment", it's pretty normal procedure.  It is not uncommon for a trial to start two years after the inciting incident at the federal level.  What you think is delicate handling is almost reckless sprinting for the federal court system.


Precisely.

Whooole lotta people here watch too much TV crime drama. Idiotically short attention spans.
 
2021-10-13 10:35:14 AM  

mainsail: What is so unsurprising, yet leaves me utterly gobsmacked is the confidence of the mediocre this guy displays. I have the feeling he's been a royal pain in the arse who has been allowed to coast for his entire life.


While complaining its 'those people' who have really held him back from attaining the levels he is owed.
 
2021-10-13 10:36:34 AM  

This Is Bold Text: Putting them judge's wife's into down as your emergency contact info... It's so profoundly dumb. And he thought it would get him out of jail magically.


Magical thinking is a major reason we are so completely farked as a society right now.
 
2021-10-13 10:37:08 AM  
Let's go Brandon!
 
2021-10-13 10:37:09 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size

Fark user imageView Full Size


McFadden has apparently been leaning pretty hard on prosecutors to prove that these people are any worse than BLM protestors so this idiot decided to jump through hoops to prove that he was a risk if released.
 
2021-10-13 10:40:14 AM  

This Is Bold Text: Putting them judge's wife's into down as your emergency contact info... It's so profoundly dumb. And he thought it would get him out of jail magically.


When SovCit goes wrong, it tends to go REAL wrong.

/ It goes wrong every time
// At least it's entertaining
/// Hahaha, taser goes BRRRRRT.
 
2021-10-13 10:40:45 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-10-13 10:41:31 AM  

phalamir: Monocultured: Nice kid glove treatment. No additional charges after all that *and* wasting the court's time.

There was nothing about no added charges.  A judge does not issue charges.  That is for a grand jury.  And the prosecutor just got sworn evidence for a grand jury.  Actual courts do not work on the speed of a Law & Order episode.  That people were not lined up and shot before the first commercial break is not "kid glove treatment", it's pretty normal procedure.  It is not uncommon for a trial to start two years after the inciting incident at the federal level.  What you think is delicate handling is almost reckless sprinting for the federal court system.


While you are right, what the GQP will see is that they are getting away with it, and so will think they can still get awat with it when they try the same exact BS after the midterms next year.
 
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