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(Daily Voice)   Protip: Be sure you can correctly identify your child among other children   (dailyvoice.com) divider line
    More: Fail, Education, Morris County, New Jersey, English-language films, school district, case of mistaken identity, possible luring, attempted child, Mount Olive Township, New Jersey  
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3635 clicks; posted to Main » on 26 Sep 2021 at 5:40 PM (9 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



35 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2021-09-26 4:27:03 PM  
A lot of children look the same from a top-down view.

We need to get a grip about children in this country. I was detained by police in a Target because my niece was being a little shiat because I told her at some point she couldn't put a toy in the cart and she said "You're not my dad you can't tell me what to do!" Boom, ten minutes later, I'm trying to explain to an officer that yes, we're related and yes, she's being a little shiat.
 
2021-09-26 5:43:27 PM  
Ehh, it's whatsisface. You know - he wears a hat.
 
2021-09-26 5:44:09 PM  
How many other kids have matching tattoos?
 
2021-09-26 5:50:02 PM  
Some people have trouble differentiating faces. Just sayin'.

prosopagnosia:face blindness. a brain disorder characterized by the inability to recognize or differentiate faces.
 
2021-09-26 5:52:02 PM  
Hey, you with the face!
 
2021-09-26 5:54:34 PM  

169th Cousin: Hey, you with the face!

3dwarehouse.sketchup.comView Full Size
 
2021-09-26 5:54:51 PM  

Lsherm: A lot of children look the same from a top-down view.

We need to get a grip about children in this country. I was detained by police in a Target because my niece was being a little shiat because I told her at some point she couldn't put a toy in the cart and she said "You're not my dad you can't tell me what to do!" Boom, ten minutes later, I'm trying to explain to an officer that yes, we're related and yes, she's being a little shiat.


Don't forget being a dad and taking your kid to the park. Clearly, as a man, you are up to no good
 
2021-09-26 5:55:38 PM  
That's why my kids all had these.
 
2021-09-26 5:56:25 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size


/ damn thumb twitch
 
2021-09-26 6:01:32 PM  
hips.hearstapps.comView Full Size
 
2021-09-26 6:03:47 PM  

Lsherm: A lot of children look the same from a top-down view.


Liz And Peter Dinklage's Doomed Romance | 30 Rock
Youtube B3Hj5rQFiX4
 
2021-09-26 6:10:26 PM  

TheDirtyNacho: Don't forget being a dad and taking your kid to the park. Clearly, as a man, you are up to no good


30 years ago, as a dad of mixed race kids...
Walking through the mall with the twins in a stroller.

I got the stinkeye from everyone.

An elderly Black woman "Oh, are they yours?"
'No ma'am...as a 30 year old single guy, I love nothing better than to cruise the mall, babysitting other peoples kids'
 
2021-09-26 6:10:27 PM  

Lsherm: We need to get a grip about children in this country. I was detained by police in a Target because my niece was being a little shiat because I told her at some point she couldn't put a toy in the cart and she said "You're not my dad you can't tell me what to do!" Boom, ten minutes later, I'm trying to explain to an officer that yes, we're related and yes, she's being a little shiat.


And this part gets a CSB:

One of my cousins stopped by with his family to visit during a road trip and we went to lunch.  Lunch is over and we've paid and we're getting up to leave but the youngest isn't ready to go yet and works up to a bit of a tantrum.  She starts pulling him out of the restaurant.  "YOU'RE NOT MY MOM!!!!"

I learned that a woman can drag a screaming toddler out of a crowded restaurant and nobody will say a word if she looks annoyed enough.
 
2021-09-26 6:17:36 PM  

Lsherm: A lot of children look the same from a top-down view.

We need to get a grip about children in this country. I was detained by police in a Target because my niece was being a little shiat because I told her at some point she couldn't put a toy in the cart and she said "You're not my dad you can't tell me what to do!" Boom, ten minutes later, I'm trying to explain to an officer that yes, we're related and yes, she's being a little shiat.


Yikes that's a really crappy situation. Hopefully you and her can laugh about it one day.
 
2021-09-26 6:26:38 PM  
When they are all wearing masks and identical ensembles from Target. fark if I can tell the difference among 'em.
 
2021-09-26 6:26:52 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-09-26 6:27:38 PM  
At that age, aren't they pretty much interchangeable?
 
2021-09-26 6:32:32 PM  
That's why I spray paint my kid's head orange
 
2021-09-26 6:45:29 PM  
Just install some running lights on the kid, and use one of these:

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-09-26 6:53:20 PM  
When picking your child up from school,
"Close Enough" probably isn't.
 
2021-09-26 6:57:26 PM  

TheDirtyNacho: Lsherm: A lot of children look the same from a top-down view.

We need to get a grip about children in this country. I was detained by police in a Target because my niece was being a little shiat because I told her at some point she couldn't put a toy in the cart and she said "You're not my dad you can't tell me what to do!" Boom, ten minutes later, I'm trying to explain to an officer that yes, we're related and yes, she's being a little shiat.

Don't forget being a dad and taking your kid to the park. Clearly, as a man, you are up to no good


I got a question at the park once when I was keeping an eye on my offspring who had run off to play with some other kids on the other side of the playground. The sudden realization that my new acquaintance wasn't just making conversation, and that I was apparently a guy just standing alone at a playground staring at little kids, was a bit flustering. I don't remember what I said in response exactly but it probably made me sound like a recently escaped convict pretending to have a child in the vicinity.
 
zez
2021-09-26 7:16:42 PM  
as a stay at home dad for the last 17 years I'm getting a kick out of a lot of these replies

It's not nearly as bad as it used to be, believe me.
 
2021-09-26 7:51:47 PM  
"All these little blonde kids look alike." -- Mrs Clam's Japanese roommate, the school teacher.
 
2021-09-26 8:22:51 PM  

woodjf: Lsherm: A lot of children look the same from a top-down view.

We need to get a grip about children in this country. I was detained by police in a Target because my niece was being a little shiat because I told her at some point she couldn't put a toy in the cart and she said "You're not my dad you can't tell me what to do!" Boom, ten minutes later, I'm trying to explain to an officer that yes, we're related and yes, she's being a little shiat.

Yikes that's a really crappy situation. Hopefully you and her can laugh about it one day.


Christ, it happened eight years ago. She's still able to be a shiat as a near teenager.

Love her to death.
 
2021-09-26 8:49:32 PM  
I kinda feel sorry for the kid of the parent who had the problem with mistaken identity. For the rest of that kids life they're gonna be teased because of it.

"Hey! Remember that time your dad tried to lure me into his car to kidnap me?!"
 
2021-09-26 9:01:08 PM  

cyberspacedout: Just install some running lights on the kid, and use one of these:

[Fark user image 400x266]


media.hswstatic.comView Full Size
 
2021-09-26 9:51:00 PM  
Does it vibrate?

/asking for a friend with a very sensitive urethra
 
2021-09-26 10:42:46 PM  

MechaPyx: Some people have trouble differentiating faces. Just sayin'.

prosopagnosia:face blindness. a brain disorder characterized by the inability to recognize or differentiate faces.


Cheating spouses everywhere are in awe at the possibility of a diagnosis.
 
2021-09-26 11:57:52 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-09-27 12:07:53 AM  

pollyprepper: MechaPyx: Some people have trouble differentiating faces. Just sayin'.

prosopagnosia:face blindness. a brain disorder characterized by the inability to recognize or differentiate faces.

Cheating spouses everywhere are in awe at the possibility of a diagnosis.


There isnt a face on my penis.

...yet.
 
2021-09-27 1:41:00 AM  
trapperman.comView Full Size
 
2021-09-27 3:57:29 AM  
Veterinary ID chips at birth.

And as adults they can be used for subway ride charging.
 
2021-09-27 4:01:24 AM  
See also:

Zazie dans le Métro subway scene.
 
2021-09-27 6:28:25 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-09-27 3:37:21 PM  
I have a 15 year old who is convinced we are the worst parents in the world.

There should be an exchange program or something so kids can learn to appreciate what they have.
 
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