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(Boston Globe)   The decades-in-the-making story of how we didn't do anything about airport security, then after a crisis, overreacted with a circle jerk that didn't address airport security, leading to our current state where airport security is a joke   (bostonglobe.com) divider line
    More: Murica, Aircraft hijacking, Airport security, Transportation Security Administration, Security, airline safety, hijackings of the late 1960s, security checks, federal government  
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2625 clicks; posted to Main » and Politics » on 25 Sep 2021 at 2:25 PM (3 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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2021-09-25 12:11:06 PM  
I stopped flying flying before 2001, but the TSA ensures ill never fly commercial again.
 
2021-09-25 12:57:18 PM  
The airports were bad enough, but now we've got TSA crawling up your ass at the train station too.  Useless farks.
 
2021-09-25 2:27:08 PM  
Theater Security Administration.
 
2021-09-25 2:27:22 PM  
Subby doesn't sound like a fan of security theater. Cretin!
 
2021-09-25 2:28:57 PM  
Wut you think coming the govment.
 
2021-09-25 2:32:49 PM  
I missed the security briefing where Al Qaeda was determined to hijack trains and fly them in to buildings.
 
2021-09-25 2:35:11 PM  
Archie Bunker's Editorial on Gun Control
Youtube -lDb0Dn8OXE

Airport Security was solved back in the early 70s.
 
2021-09-25 2:35:54 PM  
Every once in a while, they catch someone with a gun in their carryon.

Anyone dumb enough to try and hijack a plane would face a wall of angry passengers.  None of that complying with their instructions.
 
2021-09-25 2:38:59 PM  
Don't forget the part where it's also a glorified jobs program now so any reduction in scope of TSA would also lead to a nominal amount of job loss both for tsa employees and contractors.
 
2021-09-25 2:44:22 PM  

Marcus Aurelius: The airports were bad enough, but now we've got TSA crawling up your ass at the train station too.  Useless farks.


I thought Amtrak told them to pound sand
 
2021-09-25 2:48:49 PM  

soupafi: Marcus Aurelius: The airports were bad enough, but now we've got TSA crawling up your ass at the train station too.  Useless farks.

I thought Amtrak told them to pound sand


Depends on the station and who owns the station. Which makes it doubly stupid, because you can just drive 5 miles to the next stop and get on without getting searched.
 
2021-09-25 2:52:37 PM  
Man, I miss the old days of flying. Walk in, buy a ticket and get on the plane. When you'd get back your friends/family would be waiting right by the gate. You could hang out at the bar right across from where your friend/family member was leaving and hang out until right before they left.

Flying sucks royal ass now.
 
2021-09-25 2:55:39 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-09-25 2:58:26 PM  
The shoe bomber event causing everyone to take them off is what got me as being totally unnecessary. Every single passenger taking off their shoes and it being scanned in a bustling airport is just insane
 
2021-09-25 3:10:24 PM  
I was wearing a pleated skirt. I got randomly selected. They said body scan or Pat down. I chose scan. They said something showed up on the scan and I'd have to have a pat down. Touchy person says, "the pleats in skirts show up as something hidden beneath so I'm going to have to pay down your butt." So all girls in pleated skirts have to get their asses touched? I call shenanigans. Also why didn't they just tell me that first so I could skip the scan? Sus AF.
 
2021-09-25 3:15:30 PM  

talkyournonsense: I'm going to have to pay down your butt.


How much is a butt down payment these days?

/I keed.
//Yes, the TSA are pervs.
 
2021-09-25 3:15:30 PM  

StubhyGraham: Don't forget the part where it's also a glorified jobs program now so any reduction in scope of TSA would also lead to a nominal amount of job loss both for tsa employees and contractors.


We'd be better off literally just giving the money to people for free.
 
2021-09-25 3:17:32 PM  
Where TSA transcended absurdity for me was flying out of a very small rural "Essential Air Service" airport.  EAS meant flying there was already ludicrously subsidized.  But (and this was a couple years after bigger airports got TSA), they eventually got two TSA permanent officers (flying in subs if someone needed a day off), installed a "secure area", carry-on-bag X-ray, the whole damned thing. In a small Kansas terminal that saw two Beech 1900s (19 seat) a day... and not even that many passengers (maybe 10 a day, the BE1900 made a couple rural stops in a loop).

What were you going to do... hijack a small turboprop?  When you got to KC or Denver, you generally went through security again anyway.

Anyway, that small airport lost its EAS service entirely a few years later, but you can feel good that we spent at least a million dollars on now-abandoned TSA improvements to that airport and probably that much on two of the most bored TSA agents in the country.
 
2021-09-25 3:26:30 PM  

talkyournonsense: I was wearing a pleated skirt. I got randomly selected. They said body scan or Pat down. I chose scan. They said something showed up on the scan and I'd have to have a pat down. Touchy person says, "the pleats in skirts show up as something hidden beneath so I'm going to have to pay down your butt." So all girls in pleated skirts have to get their asses touched? I call shenanigans. Also why didn't they just tell me that first so I could skip the scan? Sus AF.


I'm a dude who gets a pat down on my thighs every time I fly. My only guess is that my femurs are dense or I always have gun shot residue on the tops of my pants. Either of them are likely and I typically get the paper swab on my hands after the pat down. They did show me the screen while doing the pat down and it just shows a bright white area and a red circle

I am a TSA Precheck, but haven't been able to fly since I got assigned my number. I was kinda hoping that would stop the awkward pat down by someone who's clearly nervous and stand-off-ish.
 
2021-09-25 3:27:35 PM  
I find it amusing when I see old TV episodes or movies from the 60s or before, with airport scenes showing no security and people taking tickets right at the gate or airplane door.
 
2021-09-25 3:27:53 PM  

tuxq: talkyournonsense: I was wearing a pleated skirt. I got randomly selected. They said body scan or Pat down. I chose scan. They said something showed up on the scan and I'd have to have a pat down. Touchy person says, "the pleats in skirts show up as something hidden beneath so I'm going to have to pay down your butt." So all girls in pleated skirts have to get their asses touched? I call shenanigans. Also why didn't they just tell me that first so I could skip the scan? Sus AF.

I'm a dude who gets a pat down on my thighs every time I fly. My only guess is that my femurs are dense or I always have gun shot residue on the tops of my pants. Either of them are likely and I typically get the paper swab on my hands after the pat down. They did show me the screen while doing the pat down and it just shows a bright white area and a red circle

I am a TSA Precheck, but haven't been able to fly since I got assigned my number. I was kinda hoping that would stop the awkward pat down by someone who's clearly nervous and stand-off-ish.


Just cropdust the f*cker.
 
2021-09-25 3:30:12 PM  
NSFW language:

Get Out I'm the TS Mother F'ing A
Youtube n1qHUbCTXRE
 
2021-09-25 3:30:43 PM  

NINEv2: tuxq: talkyournonsense: I was wearing a pleated skirt. I got randomly selected. They said body scan or Pat down. I chose scan. They said something showed up on the scan and I'd have to have a pat down. Touchy person says, "the pleats in skirts show up as something hidden beneath so I'm going to have to pay down your butt." So all girls in pleated skirts have to get their asses touched? I call shenanigans. Also why didn't they just tell me that first so I could skip the scan? Sus AF.

I'm a dude who gets a pat down on my thighs every time I fly. My only guess is that my femurs are dense or I always have gun shot residue on the tops of my pants. Either of them are likely and I typically get the paper swab on my hands after the pat down. They did show me the screen while doing the pat down and it just shows a bright white area and a red circle

I am a TSA Precheck, but haven't been able to fly since I got assigned my number. I was kinda hoping that would stop the awkward pat down by someone who's clearly nervous and stand-off-ish.

Just cropdust the f*cker.


Lol I never trust a fart when I have pre-flight nerves.
 
2021-09-25 3:43:01 PM  

tuxq: NINEv2: tuxq: talkyournonsense: I was wearing a pleated skirt. I got randomly selected. They said body scan or Pat down. I chose scan. They said something showed up on the scan and I'd have to have a pat down. Touchy person says, "the pleats in skirts show up as something hidden beneath so I'm going to have to pay down your butt." So all girls in pleated skirts have to get their asses touched? I call shenanigans. Also why didn't they just tell me that first so I could skip the scan? Sus AF.

I'm a dude who gets a pat down on my thighs every time I fly. My only guess is that my femurs are dense or I always have gun shot residue on the tops of my pants. Either of them are likely and I typically get the paper swab on my hands after the pat down. They did show me the screen while doing the pat down and it just shows a bright white area and a red circle

I am a TSA Precheck, but haven't been able to fly since I got assigned my number. I was kinda hoping that would stop the awkward pat down by someone who's clearly nervous and stand-off-ish.

Just cropdust the f*cker.

Lol I never trust a fart when I have pre-flight nerves.


Hmm...I never thought about going commando, putting an aluminum-foil cutout of a gun in my back pocket, and then eating at Taco Bell just before getting to the airport.
 
2021-09-25 3:45:21 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-09-25 4:21:14 PM  

Harry Freakstorm: Every once in a while, they catch someone with a gun in their carryon.


That happens multiple times every day. We find thousands of handguns across the nation.
 
2021-09-25 4:31:15 PM  

majestic: Man, I miss the old days of flying. Walk in, buy a ticket and get on the plane. When you'd get back your friends/family would be waiting right by the gate. You could hang out at the bar right across from where your friend/family member was leaving and hang out until right before they left.

Flying sucks royal ass now.


And you could have a smoke during the flight!
 
2021-09-25 4:33:14 PM  

TSA agent: Harry Freakstorm: Every once in a while, they catch someone with a gun in their carryon.

That happens multiple times every day. We find thousands of handguns across the nation.


But mah Freedumbz!
 
2021-09-25 4:35:33 PM  

Pershing123: And you could have a smoke during the flight!


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-09-25 4:49:45 PM  

TSA agent: Harry Freakstorm: Every once in a while, they catch someone with a gun in their carryon.

That happens multiple times every day. We find thousands of handguns across the nation.


Ever get cropdusted?
 
2021-09-25 5:10:03 PM  

majestic: Man, I miss the old days of flying. Walk in, buy a ticket and get on the plane. When you'd get back your friends/family would be waiting right by the gate. You could hang out at the bar right across from where your friend/family member was leaving and hang out until right before they left.

Flying sucks royal ass now.


2 CSBs from the "old days."

Wifey and I flying out of Burbank, (2 terminal airport) really really late for the flight. It was a trip to see her crackpot relatives, so I dropped her at the curb (white zone) and told her to board, while I went and parked.  I was expecting, and hoping, that I'd miss the flight.  Still, I made the effort to get back after parking.  Ran through terminal, down to gate, outside (it was a boarding from the tarmac) and see the plane is still there, a flight attendant waving at me to "come on."  I run across the tarmac, up the stairs, through the door and into the plane and I hear a loud bellowing voice "Hammettman's here, we can leave!" and the plane erupts in cheers, applause.  Freaked me the hell out as wifey had found a friend of her grandmother's on board, a Pasadena society matron.  She was loud when sober.  It was 11:45am and she was already blasted. Apparently, wifey had asked her to "ask" the crew not to leave until I had boarded.  What society matron did was walk up and down the plane while stating "we're not going anywhere until *Hammettman* gets on board."  Obviously, in our present day, I's sure I would have been assaulted when I boarded, and society matron banned from all future flights.  But that was then. Somewhat amazed at how she kept the plane from leaving, (about a full 14 minutes after departure time) but I recall she had promised a round of drinks for some passengers.  Don't know how many she bought (I received 3 myself after I sunk into my seat and tried to disappear)

CSB2: I was the LA office of a film crew after they left for location.  Something happened during production and a star crewman had walked off set, flown home the night before.  Apparently, the producer had patched things up that morning and the star was booked to fly back that day.  At 1:15p the producer calls me, tells me that *star* is to leave on a 2:20p flight from LAX.  I need to be at the airport to guarantee that he's on that plane, otherwise they may need to make a decision about shutting down production.  I fly out the door, make the hour drive to LAX in 45 minutes, park my car outside a parking garage, illegally (expecting certain tow-away) and dash into the terminal.  Run through the long halls, OJ style, leaping over baggage, and make it to the gate where they are already boarding.  After most have boarded, with only a few passengers still streaming in, I plead my case to the gate agent.  She lets me walk down the tube and peer into the plane. I explain to the flight attendant in the plane, "Oh, I'm just looking for *star* I think he's boarded, he's in 1st class."  They let have a brief look, but I honestly wasn't sure.  So I'm waved back to the boarding gate as a few more passengers trickle in.  The plane is going to leave soon.  I have to make a call to the producer and confirm that, "yes, *star* is on the plane and on his way to you (in which case production continues) or tell producer that "no, *star* did not get on the plane (in which case production will shut down at least a day, costing untold fortunes.)  Still not even sure if he wasn't already on the plane.  I fancy, maybe guessing that's the case (and realize the shiat I'd be in if my guess was wrong)  Panic sets in.  I briskly scan the gate area, then move to the adjoining gate area, then back, then to the adjacent areas.  All the while, because I'm sure I looked "lost" I'm getting approached by people, looking sell me things (early 90s) even a Hare Krishna crowd, whereupon I actually shouted DO i LOOK LIKE I WANT A FARKING FLOWER. It was almost the Robert Stack scene in Airplane! Anyway, almost a full-blown panic attack when suddenly I actually get goosed in the ass, halfway up to my spleen by *star.*  He'd just come out of the Club Lounge, which I didn't check, nor had access to.  Anyway, he offered his Pro Tip: Never board until the doors are ready to close.  Anyway, I made my call, recovered my blood pressure, and sat at the airport bar for 2 pints after the plane left.
 
2021-09-25 5:15:58 PM  
You sound like the gun nuts: "if the law isn't 100% effective then it's useless." Maybe you should protest by always flying with a knife in your carry-on.
 
2021-09-25 5:16:26 PM  
In this thread:

1. People who didn't read TFA, its actually pretty positive towards the TSA and covers their challenges, and some of the good it has done

2. People who fly once every 3 years on the cheapest flight they can for their pilgrimage to Orlando from West Bumblefark, and expect to be treated like the high days of Pan Am

3. People who have no idea what flying and security was like (it was both worse, except they gave you a crappy sandwich for free), and how expensive it was, 20+ years ago.
 
2021-09-25 5:28:42 PM  

hammettman: ...so I dropped her at the curb (white zone) and told her to board, while I went and parked.


Airplane! 1980 White zone - Red zone 🔴 UNCUT
Youtube mvYOTz5n6GI
 
2021-09-25 5:39:18 PM  
In 1987 a white guy went into the cockpit of a plane in California about halfway into the flight and shot the pilots. The plane crashed, killing everyone, 40 something people. If we really cared about plane security, what happened in Sept. 2001 wouldn't have been possible.
 
2021-09-25 5:39:46 PM  
Lol fark you, not subscribing to your fish rag.
 
2021-09-25 5:53:20 PM  

JerseyTim: [Fark user image image 850x517]


Omg look how well the TSA is working!!
 
2021-09-25 6:34:02 PM  
The only thing we needed to do to have proper airport security is to remove passenger access to pilots, disallow all carryon luggage, and scan all luggage for bombs.  There was no need at all for enhanced gate security if you did those three things, and we'd never have another hijacked plane or airline bomb again.
 
2021-09-25 6:59:26 PM  

Smelly Pirate Hooker: In 1987 a white guy went into the cockpit of a plane in California about halfway into the flight and shot the pilots. The plane crashed, killing everyone, 40 something people. If we really cared about plane security, what happened in Sept. 2001 wouldn't have been possible.


Ah, David Burke.

ca-times.brightspotcdn.comView Full Size


He was a Black guy flying with a work ID that hadn't been confiscated, so it enabled him to bypass security.
 
2021-09-25 7:05:21 PM  

Harry Freakstorm: Every once in a while, they catch someone with a gun in their carryon.

Anyone dumb enough to try and hijack a plane would face a wall of angry passengers.  None of that complying with their instructions.


These days? Yep. Fark you gunman, we now assume you're aiming this thing at the ground or a building full of people.  Either way we don't live, so let's see how Many bullets that arsehole has.  Launch your shoes, boiling water, and luggage at the f@ker..

But the rules still apply. Eat what you kill, even in the friendly skies.
 
2021-09-25 7:30:21 PM  

duckpoopy: You sound like the gun nuts: "if the law isn't 100% effective then it's useless." Maybe you should protest by always flying with a knife in your carry-on.


Well maybe we expect to get a little more for our money and freedom.
 
2021-09-25 8:33:12 PM  

TSA agent: Smelly Pirate Hooker: In 1987 a white guy went into the cockpit of a plane in California about halfway into the flight and shot the pilots. The plane crashed, killing everyone, 40 something people. If we really cared about plane security, what happened in Sept. 2001 wouldn't have been possible.

Ah, David Burke.

[ca-times.brightspotcdn.com image 850x487]

He was a Black guy flying with a work ID that hadn't been confiscated, so it enabled him to bypass security.


Duly noted, sounded like a white guy name, LOL. My bad. I shoulda said "American" or "non Middle Eastern."
 
2021-09-25 8:50:09 PM  

drayno76: talkyournonsense: I'm going to have to pay down your butt.

How much is a butt down payment these days?

/I keed.
//Yes, the TSA are pervs.


Freedom costs $1.05
 
2021-09-25 8:59:39 PM  
My first flight after 9/11 was the week after and I've hated flying ever since.

I was supposed to fly on 9/12 but, well...
 
2021-09-25 9:04:48 PM  
As Harteveldt put it, the job of airport security was "akin to a job in fast food."

That hasn't changed.
 
2021-09-25 9:32:37 PM  

duckpoopy: You sound like the gun nuts: "if the law isn't 100% effective then it's useless." Maybe you should protest by always flying with a knife in your carry-on.


Reasons that my bag has been gone through a manual search:

1. A strip of AA batteries
2. A Latshaw Pocket Wrench II
3. Blocks of cheese
4. An Apples to Apples deck
5. A box of medals and awards from my dad's high school bedroom
6. A weird metal picture frame (with loops around the edges)
7. A laptop with a dead battery

Only the first one was before 2001.  3 and 4 probably weren't helped by also carrying a fair number of cables and electronics with me.  7 was the only one not in the US.  And really slowed me down, as I was in Germany, and didn't have a European outlet adaptor on me, so couldn't light it up.   Had to wait almost an hour for a technician to come and open the laptop so they could inspect the innards.

I've probably had other bag searches that weren't as memorable.  I've been pulled aside for extra screening with a hand scanner so many times I lost count.  (Mediterranean looks, full beard, long hair)

I also know that avoiding showing them a driver's license will get you a groping. (Even an HSPD12 badge, when the TSA idiot said 'I've never seen one of these', and I point out that he's wearing one, just from a different agency.  Some places didn't like pre-HSPD12 badges, or university IDs (from a public school, so government), or expired military ID.)

Although once when showing my HDPD12 badge, it got me moved to the 'clear' line at BWI.

Baggy shirts are fine through metal detectors, but get you the pat down on the millimeter wave body scanners.  ScottEVest shirts will also get you a pat down.  (I suspect it's the hidden pocket that's shielded that shows up, as they focused on my torso for that one)
 
2021-09-25 11:56:51 PM  
We did ONE thing after 9/11 that was highly effective and actually mattered - we turned the cockpits into bank vaults so nobody can get in.  That's it.  Everything else is security theater.
 
2021-09-26 7:09:06 AM  
In other words, the American Solution to Every Problem(tm)
 
2021-09-26 7:28:21 AM  

Oneiros: university IDs (from a public school, so government)


We have a list of what is acceptable. School IDs aren't on the list.

https://www.tsa.gov/travel/security-s​c​reening/identification
 
2021-09-26 3:06:38 PM  
While airport security is not fun, and really sucks to interact with, the truth of the matter is that airport security today is much better than it was pre 9-11, when it was ran by private contractors.  Yes it has problems, it is far from perfect, as is true of all government programs, but as is also true of all government programs, it is far better than a private sector alternative of using a for profit security company to manage it.  A huge part of the problem is the right looks for, and magnifies every little problem with the TSA, because they want the TSA to fail, so we can go back to the old system of just shoveling money over to billionaires.

Private contract companies doing government work always suck, and are the chief reason government is perceived to suck. It's not just the TSA, look at our prison system.  Sure government ran prisons are terrible, but they are much better than private prisons.  You know why your child's school lunch sucks?  Because companies like Aramark contract out cafeteria services, and they intentionally serve your children old and expired food, time and again, because its better for the profit margins than buying fresh food to replace the spoiled, and no one ever stands up to them for doing it.  You can't argue there is a free market alternative, because the children are a captive costumer base.

Government is often horrible at doing things, but government follows regulations that are designed to set a minimum standard of quality.  For profit companies ignore these standards in favor of profits.
 
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