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(Buzzfeed News)   R Kelly's defense is that he's just like Martin Luther King Jr and Mike Pence, or something. What a pisser   (buzzfeednews.com) divider line
    More: Awkward, Testimony, Attorney Deveraux Cannick's MLK metaphor, Witness, R. Kelly's defense lawyer, Martin Luther King, Jr., Hugh Hefner, alleged victims, Assistant US Attorney Nadia Shihata  
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544 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 24 Sep 2021 at 2:45 AM (3 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



13 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2021-09-23 9:44:01 PM  
Mathew 5:30
And if thy right testicle is like Mike Pence, cut it off, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.
 
2021-09-24 12:02:42 AM  
Well, yeah, I guess he *is* like Martin Luther King, Jr.

Both of them were made up of Carbon, Hydrogen, Oxygen, Nitrogen, and the same other assorted elements.  So no difference at all, really.
 
2021-09-24 3:21:23 AM  
Wow, that closing argument made less sense than this one from his first trial:

The Boondocks - R. Kelly Verdict (2005)
Youtube 6D08yJL4rks
 
2021-09-24 4:02:41 AM  
That's stupid. Errbody knows Mike Pence likes the fellas, and he likes it when they pee on him. Not the other way around.
 
2021-09-24 5:12:39 AM  
Mike Pence likes underage 'tang? MLK was into ordering in high schoolers like they were take out?

What a country!
 
2021-09-24 5:47:02 AM  

Neondistraction: Wow, that closing argument made less sense than this one from his first trial:

[YouTube video: The Boondocks - R. Kelly Verdict (2005)]


Was that Adam West? 😂
 
2021-09-24 6:44:38 AM  
Hef promoted better music, though
 
2021-09-24 7:14:36 AM  
During his closing argument, Cannick repeatedly mocked Kelly's alleged victims and accused them of lying about being sexually abused. He attempted to cast doubt on the testimony given by Sonja - who had testified that Kelly once held her in a room for days, depriving her of food and water before drugging and raping her - by questioning why she didn't leave when an employee offered her a condom, why she didn't go to the police, and why she put on her nightgown if she wanted to escape. He even mimicked her, at one point saying in a small voice through fake tears, "He raped me."
Gee I don't know why people think lawyers are horrible people.
 
2021-09-24 8:28:06 AM  

Commander Lysdexic: During his closing argument, Cannick repeatedly mocked Kelly's alleged victims and accused them of lying about being sexually abused. He attempted to cast doubt on the testimony given by Sonja - who had testified that Kelly once held her in a room for days, depriving her of food and water before drugging and raping her - by questioning why she didn't leave when an employee offered her a condom, why she didn't go to the police, and why she put on her nightgown if she wanted to escape. He even mimicked her, at one point saying in a small voice through fake tears, "He raped me."
Gee I don't know why people think lawyers are horrible people.


I think we've gotten past the point where this kind of noxious shiat works on a jury, and that people have a bit more of an understanding of the dynamics of abusive relationships.  But I hope I am not disappointed here.
 
2021-09-24 11:57:00 AM  

Lambskincoat: Mathew 5:30
And if thy right testicle is like Mike Pence, cut it off, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.


I would have thought it was more of a 2 Corinthians vibe like that other fan of golden showers.
 
2021-09-24 2:10:41 PM  

Exile On Beale Street: Neondistraction: Wow, that closing argument made less sense than this one from his first trial:

[YouTube video: The Boondocks - R. Kelly Verdict (2005)]

Was that Adam West? 😂


The Boondocks always had some interesting guests.  Looking at you Herzog.
 
2021-09-24 3:55:28 PM  
So he's using the "My lawyer was crazy, I need a retrial." defense.

Also known as the "Giuliani Defense".

Good luck with that.

/not really. Burn in hell asshole.
 
2021-09-24 6:34:36 PM  

creckert: Exile On Beale Street: Neondistraction: Wow, that closing argument made less sense than this one from his first trial:

[YouTube video: The Boondocks - R. Kelly Verdict (2005)]

Was that Adam West? 😂

The Boondocks always had some interesting guests.  Looking at you Herzog.


And Mark Hamill as a high end weed dealer.
 
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