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(NYPost)   That's not a charging station   (nypost.com) divider line
    More: Dumbass, Penis, Mental disorder, Urethra, Urine, Urinary bladder, Urinary system, Urinary tract infection, Urination  
•       •       •

4581 clicks; posted to Main » on 17 Sep 2021 at 2:54 PM (5 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



86 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


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2021-09-17 1:59:11 PM  
Looks like a USB Printer cable to me. Though how he ended up with both ends dangling out of Mr. Winky is a mystery.
 
Xai [TotalFark]
2021-09-17 2:38:14 PM  
Now that's a new excuse...
 
2021-09-17 2:40:21 PM  
"A UK teen had to undergo emergency surgery after a bananas attempt to measure his manhood resulted in him getting a USB cable lodged in his urethra."
Fark user imageView Full Size

/
Not kink-shaming.
 
2021-09-17 2:48:13 PM  

Xai: Now that's a new excuse...


Yeah.....  Measuring.  By sticking a USB cable up your pee hole.  As if that's a much better excuse than "I saw it on the Internet and it looked like it felt good, so..."
 
2021-09-17 2:57:32 PM  
I don't think I've ever closed a browser tab so quickly
 
2021-09-17 2:57:50 PM  
You measure from the outside moron.
 
2021-09-17 2:58:15 PM  
cable became lodged in the curious teen's scrotum like an electronic catheter
Not surprised that a NY Post writer has zero understanding of anatomy
 
2021-09-17 2:58:54 PM  
Should have just pulled it out like he's starting a lawnmower.
 
2021-09-17 2:59:19 PM  
Micro-USB
 
2021-09-17 2:59:58 PM  
Dude must have thought... "I stuck that rolling pin up me bum and it hurt at first, but then made me splooge... maybe this wire in me willie is going to be like that... "
 
2021-09-17 3:01:17 PM  

TofuTheAlmighty: cable became lodged in the curious teen's scrotum like an electronic catheter Not surprised that a NY Post writer has zero understanding of anatomy


memecreator.orgView Full Size

I am not surprised one bit.
 
2021-09-17 3:01:24 PM  
Hah! Now USP cable! Yeah!
 
2021-09-17 3:01:50 PM  
Narrator:
He was not measuring the length of his penis.
 
2021-09-17 3:02:44 PM  

Solty Dog: Should have just pulled it out like he's starting a lawnmower.


Ok, your comment made me double-over and cross my legs real quick.

Bravo!
 
2021-09-17 3:02:52 PM  
His days of standing to pee are done.
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-09-17 3:03:06 PM  
I have a childhood friend that as a kid had to go to the ER to get a LEGO antenna removed from his urethra. I sure hope he doesn't read Fark or our next conversation might be awkward. Unless it was really common to have kids with LEGO in their junk in the early 1980s.
 
2021-09-17 3:03:07 PM  
images.roughtrade.comView Full Size
 
2021-09-17 3:03:37 PM  
MIL-STD-38-triple-nine USB 2.0 TYPE A connector?
Fark user imageView Full Size


Yeah, that's gonna require an extraction tool.
 
2021-09-17 3:03:42 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-09-17 3:04:10 PM  
Shoving things inside something is the best method to measure it's length. For example, to measure your height rectally...
 
2021-09-17 3:04:29 PM  
Fark autoformatting ftw!
 
2021-09-17 3:05:32 PM  
Suprised it was the UK instead of China. Last couple of years when this happened it happened in China.
 
2021-09-17 3:06:19 PM  

Walker: You measure from the outside moron.


Top or bottom?
 
2021-09-17 3:06:26 PM  
FTA: "Unfortunately, Raheem said phallus-filling maneuvers are "becoming more common as everything is thanks to social media and in general the easier ways that misinformation can be spread.""
 
2021-09-17 3:08:00 PM  
LOL, no, that is not why that happened.

I mean, I hope the kid is OK and hasn't farked himself up permanently, but he didn't do that to "measure" his dong. All you need for that is a ruler (or a microscope, if you're Ex-President Useless farkwad).
 
2021-09-17 3:08:07 PM  

TofuTheAlmighty: cable became lodged in the curious teen's scrotum like an electronic catheter

Not surprised that a NY Post writer has zero understanding of anatomy



hissatsu: Shoving things inside something is the best method to measure it's length. For example, to measure your height rectally...


So is that the story?

He decided to measure the length internally AND figured he should start measuring from the balls?

Shoulda used one-a these:

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-09-17 3:09:02 PM  
64.media.tumblr.comView Full Size
 
2021-09-17 3:09:56 PM  
 
2021-09-17 3:10:22 PM  
"Million-to-one shot, Doc. Million-to-one..."
 
2021-09-17 3:10:24 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-09-17 3:10:36 PM  
th.bing.comView Full Size


That is all.
 
2021-09-17 3:10:54 PM  
Just pull on the cable like you were starting a lawnmower
 
2021-09-17 3:12:28 PM  
Tie the loose end around a doorknob and then slam the door shut
 
2021-09-17 3:13:02 PM  
I inserted this cable in my penis to measure it sounds so much better than I was masturbating and got curious and this is the result.
 
2021-09-17 3:13:18 PM  
Dongle. Haha
 
2021-09-17 3:16:12 PM  
I'm just like.... how?

Of course the measuring story is bullshiat; I'd try lying my way out of that one too.

But how do you get the end of a usb cable to feed up your urethra?

And after all that, the poor kid does not even have a cool story to share with his friends.
 
2021-09-17 3:16:29 PM  
Good thing he didn't try to helicopter it free.

He coulda put an eye out with that thing.
 
2021-09-17 3:18:06 PM  
"The sexperiment backfired when the cable became lodged in the curious teen's scrotum like an electronic catheter."

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-09-17 3:18:59 PM  
Plug and play
 
2021-09-17 3:19:52 PM  
Million to one shot doc, million to one.
 
2021-09-17 3:19:54 PM  

OddLlama: Dongle. Haha


The Guys Who Named The Dongle
Youtube RTXRZaXnD10
 
2021-09-17 3:20:51 PM  

Walker: You measure from the outside moron.


...then add 1025% for The Internet
 
2021-09-17 3:21:22 PM  
Kids: do not try this at an electric car charging station.

 
2021-09-17 3:26:57 PM  

brantgoose: Kids: do not try this at an electric car charging station.


YOU'RE NOT MY SUPERVISOR!!!
 
2021-09-17 3:27:07 PM  

Walker: You measure from the outside moron.


"22 inches and still going, world record penis right here!"
 
2021-09-17 3:28:06 PM  
img.memecdn.comView Full Size


We do get the occasional Foreign Body in Rectum (FBR) xray, but this is a new one to me.
 
2021-09-17 3:29:30 PM  

Walker: You measure from the outside moron.


I got a visit from the cops the last time I did that.
 
2021-09-17 3:31:36 PM  
Teen?

Should I have not clicked on that one?
 
2021-09-17 3:32:50 PM  
Even the person who came up with Rule 34 has got to be shaking their head at this point...
 
2021-09-17 3:38:33 PM  
It wasn't his first time with this, it was a fetish.  He had to expand his urethra over time before he could get the cable end in there.  I don't even want to think about how much dedication and effort that took.

Either that, or I have a ridiculous small opening in the end of my penis.  Maybe it's supposed to be a half-inch in diameter and nobody told me?
 
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