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(CBS Pittsburgh)   Kindergartener blows a .23, nearly OD's on hand sanitizer. Amateur   (pittsburgh.cbslocal.com) divider line
    More: Scary, Hand sanitizer, MOON TOWNSHIP, little girl, hand sanitizer, Dr. Michael Lynch, Moon Township mother, young daughter, fresh bottle of hand sanitizer  
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3118 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Sep 2021 at 3:05 PM (8 days ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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2021-09-14 12:12:19 PM  
That's just getting started using Fark standards.
 
2021-09-14 3:07:07 PM  
But enough about Matt Gaetz post college days.
 
2021-09-14 3:07:56 PM  
What happened to just eating glue?
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-09-14 3:08:26 PM  
Family Guy Lemonade Stand
Youtube 5AD-F9ilOxg
 
2021-09-14 3:08:53 PM  
You know what could have prevented this? A kindergartener with a gun.
 
2021-09-14 3:09:03 PM  
I figured it all had a bitterant added.
I guess it's a step up from eating paste.
 
2021-09-14 3:09:18 PM  
When I was a kid we'd shoot freon out of AC units into bread bags and inhale it.

Im very surprised nobody died.
 
2021-09-14 3:09:31 PM  
Kid, you're not supposed to drink the sanitizer. That's what bleach injections are for.
 
2021-09-14 3:10:57 PM  
A Kindergarten cop could have stopped this.
 
2021-09-14 3:11:29 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size

One day kid, one day.
 
2021-09-14 3:11:53 PM  

kdawg7736: A Kindergarten cop could have stopped this.


How, make the kid crawl a straight line?
 
2021-09-14 3:14:11 PM  
So, this needs a Kidz Bop version apparently.
What About Mouthwash?
Youtube 6BhpcQud-wE
 
2021-09-14 3:14:49 PM  
23 is a little old to still be blown by a kindergartener.

Im guessing this was a catholic sponsored event.
 
2021-09-14 3:15:05 PM  
"Say my alphabet backwards?!  biatch, I can't say my alphabet forwards!"
 
2021-09-14 3:15:17 PM  
Her blood-alcohol level was .23.


"I can quit ANYTIME I WANT, MOM!!!!"
 
2021-09-14 3:17:47 PM  

SumoJeb: I figured it all had a bitterant added.
I guess it's a step up from eating paste.


It's called tonic water and it's never stopped me.
 
2021-09-14 3:18:00 PM  

SumoJeb: I figured it all had a bitterant added.
I guess it's a step up from eating paste.


It doesn't. That'd mess up your next sandwich. It has some unpleasant alcohols and other stuff added.
 
2021-09-14 3:18:46 PM  
"This class, each student has their own sanitizer pump bottle at their desk with their name on it for their personal use," the mother said. "My daughter had consumed half of that bottle. She consumed 6 ounces of 70% alcohol."

Pace yourself kid, 6 shots of everclear before lunch is a bad look for a kindergartener.
 
2021-09-14 3:19:33 PM  
a sign outside the school...

"WE PUMP YOU UP"

 
2021-09-14 3:21:10 PM  
Even as a teenager, it's hard to keep a straight face when your buddy tells you that Gray Goose has a crisp, refreshing flavor. That kid must be a seasoned pro.
 
2021-09-14 3:21:27 PM  
i've seen this in the er. 

it's actually really funny once your rule out other neurological conditions and realize it's a drunk toddler chugging mom's hand sanitizer.
 
2021-09-14 3:21:28 PM  

lolmao500: Merltech: That's just getting started using Fark standards.

Am i the only one on fark who isnt an alcoholic?


Probably?
 
2021-09-14 3:21:32 PM  
"This class, each student has their own sanitizer pump bottle at their desk with their name on it for their personal use," the mother said. "My daughter had consumed half of that bottle. She consumed 6 ounces of 70% alcohol."

So, uh, where was the teacher?
 
2021-09-14 3:21:47 PM  
psssttt...hey kid....
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-09-14 3:21:56 PM  

lolmao500: Merltech: That's just getting started using Fark standards.

Am i the only one on fark who isnt an alcoholic?


That's the first thing you say if you are an alcoholic.
 
2021-09-14 3:22:44 PM  
When SARS hit years ago there were stories about some prisons freaking out and installing hand sanitizer dispensers all over the place. That first week of using alcohol hand sanitizer was fantastic for the inmates.
 
2021-09-14 3:23:24 PM  

Heamer: You know what could have prevented this? A kindergartener with a gun.


Or a family that showed their kids what hand sanitizer was for, and how to use it, before they turned 5.  Sure, "Moon Township" sounds pretty Pennsyltucky, but it's only a couple towns outside Pittsburgh.  Was this child raised by wolves or something?  Are the parents total conspiracy theorists who believe that along with vaccines and masks, hand sanitizer is somehow a government control device?  Or is this a case of "I learned it from you, mom," where the kid sees her folks get wasted on hand sanitizer every evening?
 
2021-09-14 3:24:06 PM  

pueblonative: kdawg7736: A Kindergarten cop could have stopped this.

How, make the kid crawl a straight line?


"Say your ABC's, punk."
"But I don't know them!"
 
2021-09-14 3:25:12 PM  
Oh, and clearly this born-during-the-pandemic toddler is just looking anywhere for a buzz and needs to get into rehab.

Toddler Thinks Random Objects Are Hand Sanitizing Stations ❤🥰
Youtube sN_TMgf5Ogg
 
2021-09-14 3:26:43 PM  

dbirchall: Oh, and clearly this born-during-the-pandemic toddler is just looking anywhere for a buzz and needs to get into rehab.

[Youtube-video https://www.youtube.com/embed/sN_TMgf5​Ogg]


Awww, what a little idiot.
 
2021-09-14 3:26:44 PM  
That kid is going to be fun to raise.
 
2021-09-14 3:26:49 PM  

thisisyourbrainonFark: "This class, each student has their own sanitizer pump bottle at their desk with their name on it for their personal use," the mother said. "My daughter had consumed half of that bottle. She consumed 6 ounces of 70% alcohol."

So, uh, where was the teacher?


There's a reason why hand sanitizer bottles are small for kids. That way they get a buzz instead of alcohol poisoning in case of ingestion.
 
2021-09-14 3:28:22 PM  

thisisyourbrainonFark: So, uh, where was the teacher?


Dealing with the kids on cocaine.
 
2021-09-14 3:29:19 PM  

lolmao500: Merltech: That's just getting started using Fark standards.

Am i the only one on fark who isnt an alcoholic?


You can stay that way as long as you don't venture into the politics tab
 
2021-09-14 3:29:35 PM  

lolmao500: Merltech: That's just getting started using Fark standards.

Am i the only one on fark who isnt an alcoholic?


Lies. No one can deal with Fark sober.
 
2021-09-14 3:30:40 PM  

lolmao500: Merltech: That's just getting started using Fark standards.

Am i the only one on fark who isnt an alcoholic?


No, I'm a crack whore
 
2021-09-14 3:32:00 PM  
0.23? How did she survive?
 
2021-09-14 3:33:55 PM  

jaivirtualcard: 0.23? How did she survive?


We had a man in the ED last week with a .472 - and he survived...this time
 
2021-09-14 3:34:15 PM  

thehobbes: i've seen this in the er. 

it's actually really funny once your rule out other neurological conditions and realize it's a drunk toddler chugging mom's hand sanitizer.


What's the treatment?  Some PB & J sandwiches with some juice box sidecars?
 
2021-09-14 3:36:09 PM  

dothemath: dbirchall: Oh, and clearly this born-during-the-pandemic toddler is just looking anywhere for a buzz and needs to get into rehab.

[Youtube-video https://www.youtube.com/embed/sN_TMgf5​Ogg]

Awww, what a little idiot.


my son was about 3-4 when he found a shopkin on the ground, totally random.

For the next few weeks he carefully looked everywhere at the ground thinking the world was full of hidden treasure toys.

man, what a world that would be.
 
2021-09-14 3:36:20 PM  

Hey Nurse!: jaivirtualcard: 0.23? How did she survive?

We had a man in the ED last week with a .472 - and he survived...this time


But she is tiny
 
2021-09-14 3:38:00 PM  

Hey Nurse!: jaivirtualcard: 0.23? How did she survive?

We had a man in the ED last week with a .472 - and he survived...this time


So in some previous time, that person was there but didn't survive?
 
2021-09-14 3:41:36 PM  

Prof. Frink: Hey Nurse!: jaivirtualcard: 0.23? How did she survive?

We had a man in the ED last week with a .472 - and he survived...this time

So in some previous time, that person was there but didn't survive?


No. Actually I just posted about this guy last week. This was his third visit in two weeks to our hospital. He's getting progressively worse. He won't admit it, but he's committing suicide through alcohol. We have frequent fliers and then one day we suddenly notice they're just not there anymore. I used to wonder what happened to them. Then I decided it's best I don't know. People love to abuse themselves with drugs and alcohol. I like to think they finally sort out the help they need it. But in reality, they're probably dead
 
2021-09-14 3:44:08 PM  

GalFisk: SumoJeb: I figured it all had a bitterant added.
I guess it's a step up from eating paste.

It doesn't. That'd mess up your next sandwich. It has some unpleasant alcohols and other stuff added.


With all the different manufacturers that started making sanitizer after the pandemic hit, some of them probably don't use the same recipe formula. Maybe the teachers just bought something cheap, and didn't check to see if it was FDA approved.
 
2021-09-14 3:46:40 PM  
Mildly impressed that it's neither Wisconsin nor Oregon.
 
2021-09-14 3:48:19 PM  

thisisyourbrainonFark: "This class, each student has their own sanitizer pump bottle at their desk with their name on it for their personal use," the mother said. "My daughter had consumed half of that bottle. She consumed 6 ounces of 70% alcohol."

So, uh, where was the teacher?


Jealously trying to keep up?
 
2021-09-14 3:52:30 PM  
Kindergarten keg stands? That kid has a bright future on the SCOTUS, no?
 
2021-09-14 3:53:06 PM  

lolmao500: Merltech: That's just getting started using Fark standards.

Am i the only one on fark who isnt an alcoholic?



Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-09-14 3:53:57 PM  

fragMasterFlash: Kindergarten keg stands? That kid has a bright future on the SCOTUS, no?


Only if he's a partisan hack
 
2021-09-14 3:57:31 PM  
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