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(9 News)   Do you like Stephen King movies? Need an extra $1300? Have I got an opportunity for you   (9news.com) divider line
    More: Scary  
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1554 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 12 Sep 2021 at 8:53 PM (7 days ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



37 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2021-09-12 5:42:35 PM  
Sure why not?
 
2021-09-12 5:56:04 PM  
That's actually a solid list of movies.

IT, you get a choice of which version.  The Shining, they just pretend only the one version exists.
 
2021-09-12 5:58:02 PM  

NeoCortex42: That's actually a solid list of movies.

IT, you get a choice of which version.  The Shining, they just pretend only the one version exists.


The same should go for Pet Sematary. The remake was so, so bad. Not that the original was Oscar-worthy, but at least it was scary.

People of a certain age (I'm guessing in the 35-45 age range about now) can't hear the word "Zelda" without nearly shiatting their pants if the words "The Legend of" don't come before it.
 
2021-09-12 6:38:11 PM  

Kubo: NeoCortex42: That's actually a solid list of movies.

IT, you get a choice of which version.  The Shining, they just pretend only the one version exists.

The same should go for Pet Sematary. The remake was so, so bad. Not that the original was Oscar-worthy, but at least it was scary.

People of a certain age (I'm guessing in the 35-45 age range about now) can't hear the word "Zelda" without nearly shiatting their pants if the words "The Legend of" don't come before it.


The Shining remake was hobbled by the TV production budget (oh lordy, those hedge creatures), but otherwise had a lot of potential.

The Pet Semetary remake was just a collection of bad ideas throughout.
 
2021-09-12 7:20:46 PM  
Pretty heavy commitment.
I'll pass and let anyone who needs that money do it,
 
2021-09-12 9:00:51 PM  
No Maximum Overdrive? Come on, at least include the movie King directed himself, even if it was dumb as a box of rocks.
 
2021-09-12 9:01:49 PM  
WOW.

They left out the best.

i.ytimg.comView Full Size
 
2021-09-12 9:02:25 PM  
Sweeten the deal: $5000 if you can get through those godawful Children of the Corn sequels.
 
2021-09-12 9:10:20 PM  

stoli n coke: No Maximum Overdrive? Come on, at least include the movie King directed himself, even if it was dumb as a box of rocks.


It was dumb fun with a great soundtrack. I love it.
 
2021-09-12 9:15:55 PM  

stoli n coke: Sweeten the deal: $5000 if you can get through those godawful Children of the Corn sequels.


There's 11 of those farking things now (well, counting the original and Syfy remake).  It's like Land Before Time movies. They just keep making more somehow, but nobody knows why.
 
2021-09-12 9:22:06 PM  
It 2.....the scene in the old Marsh apartment.
I was sitting on my couch at home at 2 in the afternoon.  I knew what was coming and it still creeped the fark out of me.

Yeah, I'll take the $1300.
 
2021-09-12 9:23:50 PM  
$1300 is a lot of money to most farkers.
 
2021-09-12 9:26:21 PM  
I'm a middle-aged adult I still can't watch The Shining when it's on TV - commercial breaks and all. I'm not sure if it's the music or the cinematography, but it fills me with such an oppressive sense of dread it's all I can do to stop myself from curling up into a ball on the couch and hide under some blankets..
 
2021-09-12 9:30:27 PM  
Throw in the therapy and it's a deal.
 
2021-09-12 9:34:06 PM  

stoli n coke: No Maximum Overdrive? Come on, at least include the movie King directed himself, even if it was dumb as a box of rocks.


I prefer sack of hair. Six of one half dozen of another.
 
2021-09-12 9:36:10 PM  
Sure why not. I don't need to sleep at night anymore.
 
2021-09-12 9:36:15 PM  
What if I like George Wendt?

/And beans?
 
2021-09-12 9:41:19 PM  

The Bunyip: I'm a middle-aged adult I still can't watch The Shining when it's on TV - commercial breaks and all. I'm not sure if it's the music or the cinematography, but it fills me with such an oppressive sense of dread it's all I can do to stop myself from curling up into a ball on the couch and hide under some blankets..


Just put your tv in the freezer.
 
2021-09-12 9:41:28 PM  
You'd have to pay me $1,300 to watch his crap movies.
 
2021-09-12 9:47:59 PM  

RandyJohnson: stoli n coke: No Maximum Overdrive? Come on, at least include the movie King directed himself, even if it was dumb as a box of rocks.

I prefer sack of hair. Six of one half dozen of another.


Bag o' hammers.
 
2021-09-12 9:52:48 PM  

stoli n coke: No Maximum Overdrive? Come on, at least include the movie King directed himself, even if it was dumb as a box of rocks.


Rocks of cocaine. King himself has admitted that he was so out of his mind on coke during that time frame, he barely remembered doing it. Which is what I would say also, if I directed that cinematic turd. Hell, Emilio esteves is the only reason I have watched it more than once.
 
2021-09-12 9:59:31 PM  

Big_Doofus: You'd have to pay me $1,300 to watch his crap movies.


That's uh... that's the entire point.
 
2021-09-12 9:59:45 PM  

Big_Doofus: You'd have to pay me $1,300 to watch his crap movies.


This list seems to be the most competently made of Stephen King's horror output. The 1976 Carrie, The Shining, Christine, Cujo, the 1989 Pet Semetary, the remake of It, Misery, and The Mist are at least handled by directors that know what they're doing.

A real test of the audience would be to get through Sleepwalkers, the mini-series adaptation of the Shining (King may hate Kubrick's version, but the miniseries, which King wrote and executive produced, makes it obvious Kubrick made the right creative decisions for doing that story as a movie), The Langoliers, and that terrible adaptation of The Stand that Paramount put out last year.
 
2021-09-12 10:04:12 PM  

Bluemoons: stoli n coke: No Maximum Overdrive? Come on, at least include the movie King directed himself, even if it was dumb as a box of rocks.

Rocks of cocaine. King himself has admitted that he was so out of his mind on coke during that time frame, he barely remembered doing it. Which is what I would say also, if I directed that cinematic turd. Hell, Emilio esteves is the only reason I have watched it more than once.


As a horror movie being marketed in the age of slashers, it doesn't quite work, but as a throwback to drive-in Body Snatchers type movies, it was a lot of fun.

The marketing of that movie killed it. Those trailers of Stephen King kind of slamming other people who adapted his stuff saying "If you want something done right, you have to do it yourself." That kinda set the bar too high, like he was going to one-up Kubrick, De Palma, and John Carpenter, and the end product wasn't even close to that.
 
2021-09-12 10:05:53 PM  
Looks like you have to have a Dish to participate.
Doesn't say you can stream it.
 
2021-09-12 10:15:34 PM  

stoli n coke: Big_Doofus: You'd have to pay me $1,300 to watch his crap movies.

This list seems to be the most competently made of Stephen King's horror output. The 1976 Carrie, The Shining, Christine, Cujo, the 1989 Pet Semetary, the remake of It, Misery, and The Mist are at least handled by directors that know what they're doing.

A real test of the audience would be to get through Sleepwalkers, the mini-series adaptation of the Shining (King may hate Kubrick's version, but the miniseries, which King wrote and executive produced, makes it obvious Kubrick made the right creative decisions for doing that story as a movie), The Langoliers, and that terrible adaptation of The Stand that Paramount put out last year.


Add the television version  "Under the Dome" for real torture.
 
2021-09-12 10:21:48 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-09-12 10:29:28 PM  
At all cost, avoid Lisey's Story.  What a piece of turd that was.

Read reviews on IMDB so you know it's not just me.
https://m.imdb.com/title/tt3319460/re​v​iews?ref_=tt_ov_rt
 
2021-09-12 11:23:40 PM  

kbronsito: The Bunyip: I'm a middle-aged adult I still can't watch The Shining when it's on TV - commercial breaks and all. I'm not sure if it's the music or the cinematography, but it fills me with such an oppressive sense of dread it's all I can do to stop myself from curling up into a ball on the couch and hide under some blankets..

Just put your tv in the freezer.


No, you're supposed to unplug your tv and roll it out onto the balcony. Roll credits.
 
2021-09-12 11:38:48 PM  

stoli n coke: Sweeten the deal: $5000 if you can get through those godawful Children of the Corn sequels.


i've seen most of them. Some are amusingly bad. Pt 7 was horribly boring.
 
2021-09-12 11:54:33 PM  
Why did that link give my phone cancer?
 
2021-09-13 12:13:46 AM  
Can I wear my shamrock mask while I watch?

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-09-13 12:31:40 AM  

Kubo: NeoCortex42: That's actually a solid list of movies.

IT, you get a choice of which version.  The Shining, they just pretend only the one version exists.

The same should go for Pet Sematary. The remake was so, so bad. Not that the original was Oscar-worthy, but at least it was scary.

People of a certain age (I'm guessing in the 35-45 age range about now) can't hear the word "Zelda" without nearly shiatting their pants if the words "The Legend of" don't come before it.


Legend of Zelda NES Commercial #2
Youtube E-qBkWerZDg
 
2021-09-13 1:20:35 AM  
$1300 isn't enough to make me watch Stephen King movies.  You need to add at least one zero to that amount.
 
7 days ago  

Kubo: The same should go for Pet Sematary. The remake was so, so bad. Not that the original was Oscar-worthy, but at least it was scary.


I last saw it ~20 years ago and I still don't let my feet hang over the side of my bed where a demonic child could slash at them with a knife, even though I've got it blocked up with stuff.
 
6 days ago  

Trik: Looks like you have to have a Dish to participate.
Doesn't say you can stream it.



I was wondering if they actually expected me to pay attention while the TV was on - or even off while streaming them, but I don't want anything to do with Dish.- scarier than a Stephen King novel and worse than a movie based on one.
 
6 days ago  

Snapper Carr: What if I like George Wendt?

/And beans?


This is not a survey!
 
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