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(ABC7 Los Angeles)   I don't know what this tree did to piss off God, but it must've been bad   (abc7.com) divider line
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5820 clicks; posted to Main » on 02 Aug 2021 at 5:41 PM (16 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



42 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2021-08-02 3:54:28 PM  
"F*ck that tree in particular"
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2021-08-02 4:14:22 PM  
I blame Thor.
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2021-08-02 5:25:34 PM  
Did they get a decent bat out of the incident, at least?

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2021-08-02 5:46:04 PM  

markie_farkie: Did they get a decent bat out of the incident, at least?

[Fark user image image 850x632]


New Marvel origin story.........
 
2021-08-02 5:46:49 PM  
To be fair, a lot of gods are total dicks who'll just kill something for fun.
 
2021-08-02 5:48:45 PM  
Aren't trees hit by lightning pretty frequently? And isn't this a common result?
 
2021-08-02 5:51:58 PM  

mongbiohazard: To be fair, a lot of gods are total dicks who'll just kill something for fun.


Abraham's son found very little humor in one god in particular....
 
2021-08-02 5:58:02 PM  
seems vaguely relevant:

Al Pacino's speech about God (The Devil's Advocate)
Youtube jARp24AJWLk
 
2021-08-02 5:58:25 PM  
I don't know but they need better aim. The one that grazed [name redacted] almost did us all a huge favor.
 
2021-08-02 5:59:41 PM  

mongbiohazard: To be fair, a lot of gods are total dicks who'll just kill something for fun.


I think we've all gotten bored while playing video games, whether they be Sim City, Civilization, Skyrim, whatever. As soon as you turn on "god mode", everything else burns.
There was a game I had as a kid we got in a bargain bin called "Shadow President" where you had the ability to direct the US government to do whatever it was you wanted to do in your sandbox. Inevitably, I would get bored, save the game, and start WW3, nuking any country felt like with as many warheads as I felt like, just to see what would happen.
 
2021-08-02 6:00:18 PM  
God
Hates
Figs

it's in the bible. look it up
 
2021-08-02 6:02:59 PM  
"God" didn't do it.

That tree just said, "fark it, I'm out."
 
2021-08-02 6:03:16 PM  
probably tried to use a mask, instead of it's own God-given immune system.
 
2021-08-02 6:04:08 PM  

JesseL: Aren't trees hit by lightning pretty frequently? And isn't this a common result?


Yes.
No.
 
2021-08-02 6:05:59 PM  

markie_farkie: Did they get a decent bat out of the incident, at least?

[Fark user image 850x632]


excellent
 
2021-08-02 6:06:06 PM  
"Burning tree splits in half after lightning strike near Big Bear"

Wow, that bear must have shiat itself after seeing that happen.
 
2021-08-02 6:07:09 PM  

mongbiohazard: To be fair, a lot of gods are total dicks who'll just kill something for fun.


12The next day as they were leaving Bethany, Jesus was hungry. 13Seeing in the distance a fig tree in leaf, he went to find out if it had any fruit. When he reached it, he found nothing but leaves, because it was not the season for figs. 14Then he said to the tree, "May no one ever eat fruit from you again." And his disciples heard him say it.

So, he cursed the fig tree because it wasn't bearing fruit out of season.
 
2021-08-02 6:08:25 PM  
I once found a tree which was burnt and split by lightning.
Below the tree was a full set of talons. The longest was about two inches long. The rest of the bird was gone.
Probably from an owl or something which choose the wrong tree to rest in.
 
2021-08-02 6:08:30 PM  

JesseL: Aren't trees hit by lightning pretty frequently? And isn't this a common result?


It is. But rarely caught on video like this. Big pines in really dry conditions are unusually conducive to becoming lightning rods and the hardened sap is quite flammable.
 
2021-08-02 6:09:45 PM  
"Burning tree splits in half after lightning strike near Big Bear, proving the dangers of thunderstorms, and that bears really do shiat in the woods"

/My rejected headline
 
2021-08-02 6:10:58 PM  
external-preview.redd.itView Full Size
 
2021-08-02 6:11:35 PM  

JesseL: Aren't trees hit by lightning pretty frequently? And isn't this a common result?


It's common for me. God is always trying to strike me down.
 
2021-08-02 6:16:27 PM  

rolladuck: mongbiohazard: To be fair, a lot of gods are total dicks who'll just kill something for fun.

I think we've all gotten bored while playing video games, whether they be Sim City, Civilization, Skyrim, whatever. As soon as you turn on "god mode", everything else burns.
There was a game I had as a kid we got in a bargain bin called "Shadow President" where you had the ability to direct the US government to do whatever it was you wanted to do in your sandbox. Inevitably, I would get bored, save the game, and start WW3, nuking any country felt like with as many warheads as I felt like, just to see what would happen.


Probably not many stray cats in your neighborhood?
 
2021-08-02 6:18:37 PM  
Not bearing fruit out of season, possibly.

The Abrahamic God was never what you'd call a nice old man. His Son was not without His own moments.
 
2021-08-02 6:21:34 PM  

flondrix: mongbiohazard: To be fair, a lot of gods are total dicks who'll just kill something for fun.

12The next day as they were leaving Bethany, Jesus was hungry. 13Seeing in the distance a fig tree in leaf, he went to find out if it had any fruit. When he reached it, he found nothing but leaves, because it was not the season for figs. 14Then he said to the tree, "May no one ever eat fruit from you again." And his disciples heard him say it.

So, he cursed the fig tree because it wasn't bearing fruit out of season.


Well, yeah, there are a lot of gods and the Abrahamic one is certainly one of the pricks.

2 Kings 2:23-25. That's when the that god had bears maul 42 children to death for the high crime of making fun of a random bald guy on a road.
 
2021-08-02 6:27:21 PM  
George Carlin - Stand Up About Religion
Youtube 2tp0UNcjzl8
 
2021-08-02 6:37:26 PM  
I think it committed an act of treeson.
 
2021-08-02 7:29:40 PM  
I live a couple of miles from that ex-tree. Over time up here ive seen a lot of lightning strikes on trees, houses, tree to house, and open water. I love the monsoon weather pattern and the rain it brings, but the lightning demands caution and seeking a safe place when the cells start to get active...
 
2021-08-02 7:41:13 PM  
The tree was over 200 years old.  This was probably the result of some long-simmering dispute.
 
2021-08-02 7:48:42 PM  
God noticed this. 
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2021-08-02 7:54:50 PM  
"Burning tree splits in half after lightning strike near Big Bear"

"I don't know what this tree did to piss off God, but it must've been bad"


Must have been something serious. He set it on fire, hit it with lightning, and sent a bear to finish the job.
 
2021-08-02 8:05:14 PM  
Probably one DEEZ NUTZ joke too many.
 
2021-08-02 8:28:04 PM  
I can never understand headlines.  Was the tree burning, and then it struck by lightning because that's what the headline says?
 
2021-08-02 8:28:53 PM  
Can't believe I'm the first.

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh , Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

that was obviously fireworks
 
2021-08-02 8:42:08 PM  
That tree should really have known better than to provide a convenient path to ground for the potential difference built up in the cloud.
 
2021-08-02 8:49:40 PM  

JesseL: Aren't trees hit by lightning pretty frequently? And isn't this a common result?


Climate Change.
 
2021-08-02 9:52:31 PM  

mongbiohazard: flondrix: mongbiohazard: To be fair, a lot of gods are total dicks who'll just kill something for fun.

12The next day as they were leaving Bethany, Jesus was hungry. 13Seeing in the distance a fig tree in leaf, he went to find out if it had any fruit. When he reached it, he found nothing but leaves, because it was not the season for figs. 14Then he said to the tree, "May no one ever eat fruit from you again." And his disciples heard him say it.

So, he cursed the fig tree because it wasn't bearing fruit out of season.

Well, yeah, there are a lot of gods and the Abrahamic one is certainly one of the pricks.

2 Kings 2:23-25. That's when the that god had bears maul 42 children to death for the high crime of making fun of a random bald guy on a road.


If you think that parable is creepy, get a load of its modern defense. If you guessed that "gang members" would come up repeatedly, you'd be correct.
 
2021-08-02 9:57:21 PM  
how in the hell do people survive lighting strikes?!
 
2021-08-02 10:18:09 PM  

hotmoonsauce: how in the hell do people survive lighting strikes?!


In short, there are many kinds. While it's true that industrial lighting can weigh hundreds of pounds and is likely to be lethal, a household lamp only weighs about as much as a duck, and being struck by one is easily survivable.
 
2021-08-02 10:34:50 PM  

coldcuts: The tree was over 200 years old.  This was probably the result of some long-simmering dispute.


Oh indeed. That tree knows what it did. Or at least it used to know.
 
2021-08-02 11:19:35 PM  
I have a suspicion.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-08-03 10:40:01 AM  

Algebrat: hotmoonsauce: how in the hell do people survive lighting strikes?!

In short, there are many kinds. While it's true that industrial lighting can weigh hundreds of pounds and is likely to be lethal, a household lamp only weighs about as much as a duck, and being struck by one is easily survivable.


And what else floats in water? VERY SMALL LAMPS!!
/you who are so wise in the ways of science
 
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