Skip to content
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Gizmodo)   In their never-ending quest to make their perfect alien demi-god "relatable" to us normal humans, DC plans to give Superman a "midlife crisis"   (gizmodo.com) divider line
    More: Stupid, Superman, DC Comics, Superhero, different incarnations of Superman, Crisis on Infinite Earths, Clark Kent, Batman, Grant Morrison  
•       •       •

848 clicks; posted to Fandom » on 25 Jul 2021 at 11:14 AM (7 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



87 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all

 
2021-07-25 8:35:37 AM  
i.pinimg.comView Full Size
 
2021-07-25 8:53:02 AM  
he knows that there are others out in the galaxy who need him more.

Stay away from the ones with a red sun, dude.
 
2021-07-25 9:27:31 AM  
Mid-LifeCrisisMan tells Perry White to pound sand, storm out, "ironically" buy a slightly subtler version of downstairs' car from the post above and pick up a hot blonde to go for a crazy weekend roadtrip only barely still passing as Clark Kent with the glasses, suit & tie, (and Lois) long gone. The blonde is none other than Spider Lady, incognito, who is mostly looking for a new hunky number one henchman to hold down the web. Hijinx ensue.
 
2021-07-25 9:44:17 AM  
Like we really need that.
 
2021-07-25 9:44:32 AM  
He's going to become a vegan, start doing crossfit, and buy a bicycle.
 
2021-07-25 10:01:05 AM  
He's going to buy a motorcycle?
 
2021-07-25 11:26:57 AM  

bloobeary: He's going to buy a motorcycle?


static.comicvine.comView Full Size
Been done
 
2021-07-25 11:29:56 AM  
How do you have a midlife crisis when you are not a mortal man?  This frood has been an adult reporter for the daily planet since 1938.  Just what is his life expectancy and how can this be considered "mid-life"?

Give Batman a midlife crisis.  I think he's the only pure mortal of the bunch, certainly the "big draw".

bloobeary: He's going to buy a motorcycle?


But, being the big blue boyscout, will always wear a helmet.  Even though it will be the only thing busted when he wrecks.  Because it is the right thing to do.

/also, "you're a mean drunk, Superman."
 
2021-07-25 11:31:02 AM  
Seems a bit young to have a mid-life crisis, considering their lifespans can reach 4 digits and he's almost always portrayed (in present day at least) as being 33 (same age as Jesus).

So really it's a 3.3%-life crisis.
 
2021-07-25 11:44:10 AM  
He'll dump Lois for Harley Quinn while banging Huntress on the side, steal the Batmobile and spend weekends in Vegas with Luthor.
 
2021-07-25 11:49:39 AM  
I think Jordan Elliot already had one.
 
2021-07-25 11:52:53 AM  
Midlife Crisis on Infinite Earths
 
2021-07-25 11:55:15 AM  
I thought that was the whole Superman Red Superman Blue thing. Wasn't that a midlife crisis?
 
2021-07-25 11:56:50 AM  
Sources later apologized for the error, clarifying that they plan on giving superman a "midwife crisis" - further hinting at a new generation of the superman family...
 
2021-07-25 12:10:34 PM  
Faith No More - Midlife Crisis (Official Music Video)
Youtube U8b88US-6ts
 
2021-07-25 12:20:30 PM  
You know what's the best interpretation of Superman that I've seen in a long while? The tv show Superman and Lois on the CW. Very good stuff.
 
2021-07-25 12:56:02 PM  

browneye: You know what's the best interpretation of Superman that I've seen in a long while? The tv show Superman and Lois on the CW. Very good stuff.


Yep, because the writers of the show get it, Superman is not an alien walking amongst us, he is someone who chose to be human.

"We're really trying to put the 'super' in Superman..."

And there's the problem.  This was addressed 20 years ago in the Kingdom Come series, anytime the writers have made the alien/Super more important  than the "-man', they've lost touch with who the character.
 
2021-07-25 12:58:51 PM  
I noticed he has a little stubble. Anyone else ever wonder how he shaved and got haircuts?
 
2021-07-25 1:01:43 PM  

ScottD61080: I noticed he has a little stubble. Anyone else ever wonder how he shaved and got haircuts?


Per Superman: The Animated Series, at least for shaving, he banks his heat vision off the bathroom mirror.
 
2021-07-25 1:12:44 PM  

ScottD61080: I noticed he has a little stubble. Anyone else ever wonder how he shaved and got haircuts?


1.bp.blogspot.comView Full Size
 
2021-07-25 1:17:07 PM  

autofire372: ScottD61080: I noticed he has a little stubble. Anyone else ever wonder how he shaved and got haircuts?

Per Superman: The Animated Series, at least for shaving, he banks his heat vision off the bathroom mirror.


Is a mirror a know/cannon defense against superman's laser vision?
I feel over the last half century "heat vision" power levels are off the charts.
 
2021-07-25 1:21:56 PM  
So, Omniman?
 
2021-07-25 1:23:03 PM  
We don't need midlife crisis Superman. Superman is an actual man, who's planned and worked and knows what he wants out of life. Super dog, house, kids, and a fortress of solitude. He's an immigrant success story! One of the good ones!

His family's not rich, he puts in the hard work, despite Lex Luthor and the other haters being green with envy and scheming to blow up his life, he still manages to save the day and bring lemon squares to the PTA meeting. Saving the world and helping a neighbor both get time in the mans schedule. He's mentoring kids in Kandor with Keanu, and it never makes the mainstream media.
 
2021-07-25 1:25:09 PM  

Tax Boy: ScottD61080: I noticed he has a little stubble. Anyone else ever wonder how he shaved and got haircuts?

[1.bp.blogspot.com image 636x925]


Dat stink of burning hair...
 
2021-07-25 1:27:01 PM  

Space Station Wagon: autofire372: ScottD61080: I noticed he has a little stubble. Anyone else ever wonder how he shaved and got haircuts?

Per Superman: The Animated Series, at least for shaving, he banks his heat vision off the bathroom mirror.

Is a mirror a know/cannon defense against superman's laser vision?
I feel over the last half century "heat vision" power levels are off the charts.


Well, he's not blasting his face with full power. I imagine he can control the intensity.
 
2021-07-25 1:27:25 PM  

scottydoesntknow: Seems a bit young to have a mid-life crisis, considering their lifespans can reach 4 digits and he's almost always portrayed (in present day at least) as being 33 (same age as Jesus).

So really it's a 3.3%-life crisis.


It's a Nature vs. Nurture debate.

Does Superman know he gets to live to 400? Is he just bored on earth? Does it really matter since he can live IN our sun, and come out 10 years later being a super mega ultra god?
 
2021-07-25 1:29:46 PM  
Fortress of Solitude = Super Man-cave
 
DVD
2021-07-25 1:47:42 PM  

BadReligion: So, Omniman?


______________________________________

The New Nerd Wars - they have begun!

Superman is tougher than any Viltrumite!  The Thragg-Invincible fight on the Sun where both were burning up tells us this.  Superman can hang out in the Sun for millennia if he wants to.

Any of them, Kryptonian, Viltrumite, or even Thor could beat Homelander with the flick of a finger.
 
DVD
2021-07-25 1:49:29 PM  

Space Station Wagon: Fortress of Solitude = Super Man-cave


_________________________________

Super Mancave?

Superman's Cave?

Su "The Man" Perman's Cave?
 
2021-07-25 1:54:31 PM  

Erek the Red: browneye: You know what's the best interpretation of Superman that I've seen in a long while? The tv show Superman and Lois on the CW. Very good stuff.

Yep, because the writers of the show get it, Superman is not an alien walking amongst us, he is someone who chose to be human.

"We're really trying to put the 'super' in Superman..."

And there's the problem. This was addressed 20 years ago in the Kingdom Come series, anytime the writers have made the alien/Super more important  than the "-man', they've lost touch with who the character.

Agreed. Can't wait until it resumes for the two-part season finale starting August 10.

yet_another_wumpus: How do you have a midlife crisis when you are not a mortal man? This frood has been an adult reporter for the daily planet since 1938. Just what is his life expectancy and how can this be considered "mid-life"?

Give Batman a midlife crisis.  I think he's the only pure mortal of the bunch, certainly the "big draw".

bloobeary: He's going to buy a motorcycle?

But, being the big blue boyscout, will always wear a helmet.  Even though it will be the only thing busted when he wrecks.  Because it is the right thing to do.

/also, "you're a mean drunk, Superman."

If you haven't read it yet, I recommend John Byrne's Superman/Batman: Generations limited series. The conceit is that the two characters appeared when they did in comics history, and time has passed for the characters at a normal rate ever since rather than being basically frozen in time. It covers the Golden, Silver, and Bronze Ages, and beyond, all being similar to their proper periods, albeit with some rather intriguing reinterpretations (Supergirl is not Superman's cousin from Argo City, but his ½-human daughter, for instance).
 
2021-07-25 1:56:46 PM  
The first issue of Superman and the Authority was good though.
 
2021-07-25 2:06:43 PM  
Still no end to hearing fanboys in the 90s argue over whether Spawn/Venom/Superman would win in a fight (pick 2), since their powers all come from different sources and methods.

...and it's starting AGAIN...
 
2021-07-25 2:36:41 PM  
It's all Lois' fault.

mygaming.co.zaView Full Size
 
2021-07-25 2:38:07 PM  
He spikes up his hair at weird angles and wears orange pajamas from now on?
 
2021-07-25 3:01:19 PM  

COMALite J: Erek the Red: browneye: You know what's the best interpretation of Superman that I've seen in a long while? The tv show Superman and Lois on the CW. Very good stuff.

Yep, because the writers of the show get it, Superman is not an alien walking amongst us, he is someone who chose to be human.

"We're really trying to put the 'super' in Superman..."

And there's the problem. This was addressed 20 years ago in the Kingdom Come series, anytime the writers have made the alien/Super more important  than the "-man', they've lost touch with who the character.

Agreed. Can't wait until it resumes for the two-part season finale starting August 10.


I just hope it doesn't end the season on a cliff-hanger because 1) I hate waiting six months for a resolution; and 2) AFAIK, the series hasn't be renewed for a second season yet and I would hate it even more if the series ended on a cliff-hanger.
 
2021-07-25 3:26:41 PM  
That's what happens when you add tar into your fabricated kryptonite
 
2021-07-25 4:20:46 PM  
So he's going to give up on Metropolis and fly off to Astro City to bang Winged Victory?

/while The Confessor watches.
 
2021-07-25 4:21:54 PM  

Vacation Bible School: So he's going to give up on Metropolis and fly off to Astro City to bang Winged Victory?

/while The Confessor watches.


Fark is not your personal erotica site.
 
2021-07-25 4:22:04 PM  

yet_another_wumpus: How do you have a midlife crisis when you are not a mortal man?  This frood has been an adult reporter for the daily planet since 1938.


That guy's been dead going on 20years now.
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-07-25 4:26:54 PM  

Weird Hal: Tax Boy: ScottD61080: I noticed he has a little stubble. Anyone else ever wonder how he shaved and got haircuts?

[1.bp.blogspot.com image 636x925]

Dat stink of burning hair...


It's hair from an entirely different planet's biology.  Burning it might just smell like Febreze for all we know.
 
2021-07-25 4:30:57 PM  

Jedekai: Still no end to hearing fanboys in the 90s argue over whether Spawn/Venom/Superman would win in a fight (pick 2), since their powers all come from different sources and methods.

...and it's starting AGAIN...


Superman beats Venom by simply super-breathing the goo off Eddie's skin.

Who the hell thought Venom could do jack *or* shiat to Superman?
 
2021-07-25 4:34:20 PM  

AdrienVeidt: Jedekai: Still no end to hearing fanboys in the 90s argue over whether Spawn/Venom/Superman would win in a fight (pick 2), since their powers all come from different sources and methods.

...and it's starting AGAIN...

Superman beats Venom by simply super-breathing the goo off Eddie's skin.

Who the hell thought Venom could do jack *or* shiat to Superman?


Or he'd just super scream him away. Yeah, Venom is way too weak to be a threat.
 
2021-07-25 4:43:20 PM  

AdrienVeidt: Jedekai: Still no end to hearing fanboys in the 90s argue over whether Spawn/Venom/Superman would win in a fight (pick 2), since their powers all come from different sources and methods.

...and it's starting AGAIN...

Superman beats Venom by simply super-breathing the goo off Eddie's skin.

Who the hell thought Venom could do jack *or* shiat to Superman?


I'm sure there are a lot of dim types who thought "Venom is so badass, he can beat anyone with his badassedness"
 
2021-07-25 4:54:57 PM  

Camus' Ghost: He spikes up his hair at weird angles and wears orange pajamas from now on?


Don't judge until you've tried it.
 
2021-07-25 5:41:03 PM  
As long as he has it away from Earth.  Humans and their stuff are all too breaky for a Kryptonian who isn't on their best behavior.

Can you imagine Superman 'trying' to pick up 19 year olds?  He'd just show up, wouldn't even have to say, "I'm Superman" and the panties would drop.  And not a single guy could be drunk enough to try to get him to back off a bit.

When a God smiles at you, what are the chances you're going to turn away?  When a God frowns at you, what are the chances you're going to frown?

Luther'd make a killing selling kryptonite love charms for men to gift to their women, though.
 
2021-07-25 6:14:19 PM  
So when does the DC get around to doing Bruce Wayne as evil (not chemically induced bad as in Batman Who Laughs) or be beat by a Punisher type showing he's a revolving door for Gotham's criminals and doing jack for the city in the long run?

So far Batman has had only a bad day at the stock market, someone else claiming his inheritance checks, a bratty kid or a back ache brought by a guy Bruce Wayne miscalculated as a 'roided-up meathead.
 
2021-07-25 6:15:16 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-07-25 6:25:55 PM  
a corvette and a ponytail are necessary.  I would also like to see him teach journalism at a local community college and hold class outside and sit in chairs backwards.
 
2021-07-25 7:39:00 PM  
I will never understand why DC always seems embarrassed about Superman. Then again I will never understand like 95% of the weird stupid decisions they make, it's like they're allergic to money
 
2021-07-25 7:57:22 PM  

snoopy2zero: a corvette and a ponytail are necessary.  I would also like to see him teach journalism at a local community college and hold class outside and sit in chairs backwards.


You forgot the affair with Lana Lang...
 
Displayed 50 of 87 comments


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all


View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking




On Twitter


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.