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(Daily Herald)   That sound you heard was every Chicagolander's butthole slamming shut. Rare bidness food crossover   (dailyherald.com) divider line
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1990 clicks; posted to Food » and Business » on 20 Jul 2021 at 11:25 PM (8 days ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



49 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2021-07-20 8:20:26 PM  
That's a head scratcher of a headline.
 
2021-07-20 8:42:16 PM  
Portillos went to shiat a few years ago anyway. They're still the place to go for a B+ beef or a B- hot dog, but they got rid of all their really good salads and replaced them with crap.
 
2021-07-20 9:33:24 PM  

aimtastic: Portillos went to shiat a few years ago anyway. They're still the place to go for a B+ beef or a B- hot dog, but they got rid of all their really good salads and replaced them with crap.


Interesting, thanks for that.  There is a Portillo's that is sort of close to me that I should check out being that I did live in the outer suburbs of Chicago for a number of years and really liked their Vienna Beef hot dogs and Italian beef from small stores/sellers.

However up here in the Twin Cities we also have Chicago's Taste Authority - I did eat there decades ago and they have authentic Chicago Vienna Beef hot dogs and I should go back there again much to the dismay of my cardiologist.
 
2021-07-20 9:35:54 PM  
Their butts slam shut because of hotdogs?

/Oooo-k
 
2021-07-20 11:37:58 PM  
this seems like maybe a NINEv2 thread?

...

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Their butts slam shut because of hotdogs?

/Oooo-k


man, I wanted to get a clip of "when the hand goes up the mouth goes shut" but this is vaguely adjacent enough, I suppose...

Meatballs (7/9) Movie CLIP - Fink vs. The Stomach (1979) HD
Youtube pWPn-C5l3Sk
 
2021-07-20 11:50:16 PM  

tintar: this seems like maybe a NINEv2 thread?

...

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Their butts slam shut because of hotdogs?

/Oooo-k

man, I wanted to get a clip of "when the hand goes up the mouth goes shut" but this is vaguely adjacent enough, I suppose...

[YouTube video: Meatballs (7/9) Movie CLIP - Fink vs. The Stomach (1979) HD]


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-07-20 11:53:43 PM  

First New Username In Many Years: That's a head scratcher of a headline.


Try one of these
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2021-07-21 12:12:34 AM  
So that is why you don't put ketchup on your hot dogs! You put them in your bums.
You crazy Americans and your quirky regional customs.
 
2021-07-21 12:19:25 AM  
As long as they don't mess with the chocolate cake shake, I will remain happy.
 
2021-07-21 12:24:43 AM  
Never heard of them. Never been to Chicago either.
 
2021-07-21 12:31:23 AM  

aimtastic: Portillos went to shiat a few years ago anyway. They're still the place to go for a B+ beef or a B- hot dog, but they got rid of all their really good salads and replaced them with crap.


...says the Farker that went to Portillos for salads.
 
2021-07-21 12:33:35 AM  

kdawg7736: Never heard of them. Never been to Chicago either.


I take it you don't track Michelin ratings?
 
2021-07-21 12:50:33 AM  
Johnnie's and Gene and Jude's all day long.
/Might be bias because I live in the Belmont Cragin area
 
2021-07-21 1:14:31 AM  
 
2021-07-21 1:47:01 AM  

aimtastic: Portillos went to shiat a few years ago anyway. They're still the place to go for a B+ beef or a B- hot dog, but they got rid of all their really good salads and replaced them with crap.


There's no way you can know if Portillos has good salads or not, because nobody has ever ordered one.
 
2021-07-21 2:25:17 AM  

raygundan: aimtastic: Portillos went to shiat a few years ago anyway. They're still the place to go for a B+ beef or a B- hot dog, but they got rid of all their really good salads and replaced them with crap.

There's no way you can know if Portillos has good salads or not, because nobody has ever ordered one.


tru dat
 
2021-07-21 2:35:09 AM  
Portillo's: I'm real happy for you, and I'm gonna let you finish, but Superdawg has the best Chicago dog of all time.
 
2021-07-21 3:15:25 AM  

Needlessly Complicated: Portillo's: I'm real happy for you, and I'm gonna let you finish, but Superdawg has the best Chicago dog of all time.


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I like Superdawg, but I love Gene & Judes. Superdawg is good at dragging a dog through the garden, but Gene & Judes does Depression Dogs: One or two hot dogs in a bun, with a choice of toppings limited to mustard, onions, sport peppers and relish and a handful of greasy, fresh cut fries on top. If you want ketchup for your fries they'll give you some packets, but if you want ketchup on your dog, and you are over 16, you will be mocked by the crowd of customers lined up out the door, and the guy behind the counter will look at you with disdain as he tosses some packets in the bag. People don't mind lining up out the door, because the line moves quick, the menu only has four items; hot dogs, fries, steamed tamales, and soft drinks. The real star is the fries. They beat out 5 Guys fries in a taste test, and the owner of Gene & Judes was interviewed and he said "The secret is the grease. You need good grease to make good fries." Refreshingly honest.
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2021-07-21 3:22:36 AM  
I bet there's a Farker out there that has been to the original spot that first opened in Villa Park, IL in 1963.
 
2021-07-21 3:45:44 AM  

FrostbiteFallsMN: aimtastic: Portillos went to shiat a few years ago anyway. They're still the place to go for a B+ beef or a B- hot dog, but they got rid of all their really good salads and replaced them with crap.

Interesting, thanks for that.  There is a Portillo's that is sort of close to me that I should check out being that I did live in the outer suburbs of Chicago for a number of years and really liked their Vienna Beef hot dogs and Italian beef from small stores/sellers.

However up here in the Twin Cities we also have Chicago's Taste Authority - I did eat there decades ago and they have authentic Chicago Vienna Beef hot dogs and I should go back there again much to the dismay of my cardiologist.


As a Chicagoan, I am spoiled for choice when it comes to Italian beef and hot dogs and I prefer eating in the small neighborhood joints over Portillo's. Their food is good, but Portillo's interior is faux-retro, with brick walls and high ceilings, both of which contribute to the noise level when it's crowded. I will say Portillo's does drive-thru well. When it's busy they send extra cashiers out to take orders from further up the line with a radio headset and a tablet, even if it's raining.
 
2021-07-21 4:24:36 AM  
Sadly, my sister and her family moved from Evanston back out here to Corvallis (sis and bro-in-law met at OSU), so while I do get to see them more, it doesn't come with Chicagoland food :(

Once conventions are back up, there's always C2E2...
 
2021-07-21 5:08:32 AM  

raygundan: aimtastic: Portillos went to shiat a few years ago anyway. They're still the place to go for a B+ beef or a B- hot dog, but they got rid of all their really good salads and replaced them with crap.

There's no way you can know if Portillos has good salads or not, because nobody has ever ordered one.


I have. They had very good, very legit salads. I haven't been in a couple years but much like say, Wendy's, they'd do you right if you got dragged in while you were counting calories.

This from the place that sells shakes with an entire slice of cake in them.
 
2021-07-21 5:11:49 AM  

RoyFokker'sGhost: Sadly, my sister and her family moved from Evanston back out here to Corvallis (sis and bro-in-law met at OSU), so while I do get to see them more, it doesn't come with Chicagoland food :(

Once conventions are back up, there's always C2E2...


It's the second week of December this year if you're thinking of coming.
 
2021-07-21 7:59:24 AM  
The few times I've had a chicago dog not at Wrigley was at Byrons on W Lawerence
 
2021-07-21 8:01:25 AM  
...hit 'Add Comment' too soon.

Meant to add that they have a pretty good no frills menu. But as w/any stand - no ketchup except for fries.
 
2021-07-21 8:03:55 AM  
They have them in Phoenix, LA, Indianapolis, Minneapolis, and Tampa now.  Basically anywhere people from Chicago move.

I like them, but any decent sized city has a Chicago food place (I can think of about 5 not including Rosati's which has opened two nearby locations) which does just fine because it's just a hot dog and you can make a decent Italian beef if you put some effort into it.  I make mine with eye round.
 
2021-07-21 9:10:36 AM  
I work for the company that makes their poppy seed hot dog buns currently.   The hot dog buns are amazing.   The food is questionable at best.

A couple of shakes are good, but an IPO will ruin that, so good luck, Portillo's fans.
 
2021-07-21 11:01:47 AM  

Darkmeer: I work for the company that makes their poppy seed hot dog buns currently.   The hot dog buns are amazing.   The food is questionable at best.

A couple of shakes are good, but an IPO will ruin that, so good luck, Portillo's fans.


They already changed and wrecked the greatest fast food burger on the planet.

Buona moved up from #2 to take the title. Their avocado jack burger is 1200 calories of amazing too.
 
2021-07-21 12:15:03 PM  

NINEv2: Darkmeer: I work for the company that makes their poppy seed hot dog buns currently.   The hot dog buns are amazing.   The food is questionable at best.

A couple of shakes are good, but an IPO will ruin that, so good luck, Portillo's fans.

They already changed and wrecked the greatest fast food burger on the planet.

Buona moved up from #2 to take the title. Their avocado jack burger is 1200 calories of amazing too.


I love their cheese fries. I have a feeling they are going to start spreading all over the Midwest. They already sell frozen beef and their own blend of giardiniera in stores here.
 
2021-07-21 1:00:08 PM  
Years ago when I worked up in the north suburbs i used to eat at the Portillos in...uh...Niles maybe? It was on Dempster not too far from 294 in the Home Depot plaza. I always thought their burgers were better than their roast beef
 
2021-07-21 1:07:30 PM  

kdawg7736: Never heard of them. Never been to Chicago either.


This is incredibly insightful.  Thank you for chiming in on something you have no background in
 
2021-07-21 1:08:37 PM  

drjekel_mrhyde: Johnnie's and Gene and Jude's all day long.
/Might be bias because I live in the Belmont Cragin area


I had a bungalow in BC for a few years.  Right near Diversey and Cicero.  I loved that neighborhood.
 
2021-07-21 1:09:15 PM  

raygundan: aimtastic: Portillos went to shiat a few years ago anyway. They're still the place to go for a B+ beef or a B- hot dog, but they got rid of all their really good salads and replaced them with crap.

There's no way you can know if Portillos has good salads or not, because nobody has ever ordered one.


Wrong.   Their chopped salad was amazing.
 
2021-07-21 1:18:48 PM  
Well, I guess it was considerate of them to do this during a time when I was trying to cut back on eating out as much.  Portillo's was one of my guilty pleasures.  Moved from the Chicago land area to Austin Texas about 8 years ago and I swear I went through Portillo's withdraw.  When I moved back to the Chicago land area about 5 years ago, I was like an druggie returning to his fix.

But, this likely means the end of the Portillo's I loved.  It won't happen all at once, but over time activist investors will start insisting on changes to maximize their bottom line.  It won't be long before they are just a Midwestern McDonalds with some regional flare.
 
2021-07-21 1:21:39 PM  

gnarlywizzard: Years ago when I worked up in the north suburbs i used to eat at the Portillos in...uh...Niles maybe? It was on Dempster not too far from 294 in the Home Depot plaza. I always thought their burgers were better than their roast beef


Niles is correct.
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2021-07-21 1:50:22 PM  

forstmeister: kdawg7736: Never heard of them. Never been to Chicago either.

This is incredibly insightful.  Thank you for chiming in on something you have no background in


they did cause me to do a slight giggle/eyeroll combo-breaker, so there's that? lol.

but yeah, much as The Daily Fail informs us, I've neither been to a Portillos nor to a Chicago, therefore they both must not exist. there's like this huge blank section in the middle of the country, apparently?

/seriously, Portillos somehow comes up in nearly half of foodtab threads, I live under a rock and even I farking know what it is
 
2021-07-21 2:43:09 PM  

tintar: forstmeister: kdawg7736: Never heard of them. Never been to Chicago either.

This is incredibly insightful.  Thank you for chiming in on something you have no background in

they did cause me to do a slight giggle/eyeroll combo-breaker, so there's that? lol.

but yeah, much as The Daily Fail informs us, I've neither been to a Portillos nor to a Chicago, therefore they both must not exist. there's like this huge blank section in the middle of the country, apparently?

/seriously, Portillos somehow comes up in nearly half of foodtab threads, I live under a rock and even I farking know what it is


It could also be that some of us are insufferable about it.

Seriously though. They farked up my burger.
 
2021-07-21 3:30:19 PM  

FrostbiteFallsMN: aimtastic: Portillos went to shiat a few years ago anyway. They're still the place to go for a B+ beef or a B- hot dog, but they got rid of all their really good salads and replaced them with crap.

Interesting, thanks for that.  There is a Portillo's that is sort of close to me that I should check out being that I did live in the outer suburbs of Chicago for a number of years and really liked their Vienna Beef hot dogs and Italian beef from small stores/sellers.

However up here in the Twin Cities we also have Chicago's Taste Authority - I did eat there decades ago and they have authentic Chicago Vienna Beef hot dogs and I should go back there again much to the dismay of my cardiologist.


I would also suggest Uncle Franky's in Nordeast. It's a place I should only eat at once or twice a year, but boy is it good stuff.
 
Izo
2021-07-21 3:58:38 PM  
Ok, i realize I'm just asking for grief here................but what/ why is the 'no ketchup on hotdogs' a thing in Chicago?

Now I'm tempted to serve  some with pineapple just to piss off Mr. Izo
 
2021-07-21 4:03:08 PM  

Pixel_Jockey: FrostbiteFallsMN: aimtastic: Portillos went to shiat a few years ago anyway. They're still the place to go for a B+ beef or a B- hot dog, but they got rid of all their really good salads and replaced them with crap.

Interesting, thanks for that.  There is a Portillo's that is sort of close to me that I should check out being that I did live in the outer suburbs of Chicago for a number of years and really liked their Vienna Beef hot dogs and Italian beef from small stores/sellers.

However up here in the Twin Cities we also have Chicago's Taste Authority - I did eat there decades ago and they have authentic Chicago Vienna Beef hot dogs and I should go back there again much to the dismay of my cardiologist.

I would also suggest Uncle Franky's in Nordeast. It's a place I should only eat at once or twice a year, but boy is it good stuff.


Thank you for that suggestion.  Searched, bookmarked and saved - and that is one of those typical small places that has incredible food like the ones I did frequent long ago in the Chicago burbs based on their menu.
 
2021-07-21 4:19:51 PM  

Izo: Ok, i realize I'm just asking for grief here................but what/ why is the 'no ketchup on hotdogs' a thing in Chicago?

Now I'm tempted to serve  some with pineapple just to piss off Mr. Izo


I'll tell you the same thing my pops told me... "What're you doing in the bathroom all day and night? Why don't you get out and give someone else a chance?!?!"
 
2021-07-21 5:00:22 PM  

Izo: Ok, i realize I'm just asking for grief here................but what/ why is the 'no ketchup on hotdogs' a thing in Chicago?

Now I'm tempted to serve  some with pineapple just to piss off Mr. Izo


It's not just hotdogs, it's any sausage, really. One of the better things Portillos does is the Maxwell Street Polish, which is just a Polish Sausage, grilled onions and mustard on a poppy seed bun. My hypothesis is that Chicago was full of Germans, Poles, Italians and many other sausage making cultures, all of which traditionally used mustard.

Also, modern ketchup is mostly high fructose corn syrup. Hot dogs are already relatively sweet due to the filler, the white bread bun is sweet. How much sugar do you need, in order to enjoy an entree? Get you some good quality mustard. It's the Chicago way.
 
2021-07-21 7:02:49 PM  

forstmeister: raygundan: aimtastic: Portillos went to shiat a few years ago anyway. They're still the place to go for a B+ beef or a B- hot dog, but they got rid of all their really good salads and replaced them with crap.

There's no way you can know if Portillos has good salads or not, because nobody has ever ordered one.

Wrong.   Their chopped salad was amazing.


Sure, unicorns are amazing too... but they're not real either.

/kidding
//I hope that has been obvious the whole time
///if not, I did once see a salad at a Portillos.  I can't be sure it was ordered there, though.
 
2021-07-21 7:27:14 PM  
The Maxwell Street Polish is pretty good, usually my go-to when I go, but then I was turned on to Jim's Original right near Maxwell Street next to UIC, and, well, it sucks that I live closer to Portillo's than Jim's Original.

/also with Portillo's going public, it means they can now become just another feather in the portfolio of Yum! Brands and lose all sense of specialness that comes with it
 
2021-07-21 9:32:00 PM  

germ78: The Maxwell Street Polish is pretty good, usually my go-to when I go, but then I was turned on to Jim's Original right near Maxwell Street next to UIC, and, well, it sucks that I live closer to Portillo's than Jim's Original.

/also with Portillo's going public, it means they can now become just another feather in the portfolio of Yum! Brands and lose all sense of specialness that comes with it


Your optimism continues to inspire me.

But you're probably right.
 
2021-07-21 10:29:44 PM  

Psychopompous: gnarlywizzard: Years ago when I worked up in the north suburbs i used to eat at the Portillos in...uh...Niles maybe? It was on Dempster not too far from 294 in the Home Depot plaza. I always thought their burgers were better than their roast beef

Niles is correct.
[Fark user image image 850x563]
[Fark user image image 850x637]


Yeah thats the place...there was a good bagel shop near there too but I dont remember the name of it
 
2021-07-22 4:56:24 AM  

likefunbutnot: RoyFokker'sGhost: Sadly, my sister and her family moved from Evanston back out here to Corvallis (sis and bro-in-law met at OSU), so while I do get to see them more, it doesn't come with Chicagoland food :(

Once conventions are back up, there's always C2E2...

It's the second week of December this year if you're thinking of coming.


That's around the rescheduled Emerald City, so I'll have to wait until 2022...
 
2021-07-22 9:23:35 AM  

Rapmaster2000: They have them in Phoenix, LA, Indianapolis, Minneapolis, and Tampa now.  Basically anywhere people from Chicago move.

I like them, but any decent sized city has a Chicago food place (I can think of about 5 not including Rosati's which has opened two nearby locations) which does just fine because it's just a hot dog and you can make a decent Italian beef if you put some effort into it.  I make mine with eye round.


It isn't hard to do. I use bottom round myself.  Which is about all that cut is good for.

And sliced. Sliced is the only way to go. All these bored Chicagoland moms like to do crock pot Italian beef. "Errrrr my secret is pepperocini juice!" And then shred the meat. I've had bad beefs before, but none worse than slow cooker beef at a "party". Dry AF, mealy and too much oregano (rookie mistake).

And the hardest part for us exiled FIBs is finding the proper bread. Ciabatta will work in a pinch, but it just isn't the same.
 
2021-07-22 1:19:27 PM  

NINEv2: It could also be that some of us are insufferable about it.

Seriously though. They farked up my burger.


the second part, man that really sucks.

but as to the first part, I've never found anyone here being insufferable about it, then again I'm always happy to learn new things esp. about places I may never see or experience. in my $tiny_mind, Chicago contains an exotic panoply of noms, and I'm happy to continue thinking that.
 
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