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(News9 Oklahoma)   If you leave personal items at a gravesite in a cemetery, just know that someone may need to mow the lawn   (news9.com) divider line
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3904 clicks; posted to Main » on 23 Jun 2021 at 4:18 PM (4 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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2021-06-23 2:34:04 PM  
Is there a cemetery that doesn't have signs prohibiting placing items on graves, or planting flowers, or stuff like that? I get it that they didn't want their stuff tossed in a heap, but just inquire about mowing times.
 
2021-06-23 2:43:50 PM  
If they're personal and sentimental, why leave them outside in the elements?
 
2021-06-23 3:04:36 PM  

scottydoesntknow: If they're personal and sentimental, why leave them outside in the elements?


Look... some people really can't cope with life and death or pretty much everything.

It's best to just nod your head and move on.

Usually safer too.
 
2021-06-23 4:24:43 PM  
That's standard operating procedure at cemeteries, and they'll tell you that when setting up the burial. They'll leave it out for a few days, maybe a week, but eventually they have remove the items. If they didn't the place would look like hell pretty quick.
 
2021-06-23 4:25:25 PM  
"Sentiment be damned, we've gotta keep this grass under an inch or it'll hurt sales."
...
"Dang, how come new generations always disrespect the older ones?"
 
2021-06-23 4:26:46 PM  
Someone should warn her about mixing bleach and ammonia.
 
2021-06-23 4:26:58 PM  
Just ask your mom's poltergeist to fix the issue.
 
2021-06-23 4:27:21 PM  
Why do I picture this woman envisioning the groundskeeper as a cackling, red-clad maniac with horns careening over the plots and laughing maniacally every time he shreds a poor family's sentimental goodbyes?

Reality? A poor groundskeeper had to stop, and unfortunately remove each one. Almost guaranteed that the cemetery sign has a note about whether flowers should be left, etc.
 
2021-06-23 4:27:37 PM  
Cremation. Why involve a cemetery at all?
 
2021-06-23 4:30:16 PM  
Well what did they think happened to it, that it went up to heaven to be with their loved one? And if you are leaving plastic plants/flowers at a grave that seems tacky. Leave them and let them decay.
 
2021-06-23 4:30:40 PM  

Somaticasual: Why do I picture this woman envisioning the groundskeeper as a cackling, red-clad maniac with horns careening over the plots and laughing maniacally every time he shreds a poor family's sentimental goodbyes?

Reality? A poor groundskeeper had to stop, and unfortunately remove each one. Almost guaranteed that the cemetery sign has a note about whether flowers should be left, etc.


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-06-23 4:32:27 PM  
rest assured, your deceased loved one's spirit has returned to their grave and taken the spirit of the items you laid there, then returned to the spirit realm with those spirit items and placed them on their spirit shelf because they miss you too and can't wait until you're dead and everyone can be together again, just like before.
 
2021-06-23 4:33:33 PM  

beezeltown: Cremation. Why involve a cemetery at all?



Exactly.

I found one that's even better depending on your health. You can sign up for this service, when you die they collect your body from the hospital/wherever, they strip it like a stolen car and take anything of value, cremate whatever is left, and ship your ashes to whoever/wherever you want. Best part? It's FREE.
 
2021-06-23 4:33:52 PM  
You gotta pick a cemetery where maintenance is not quite as thorough. My parents were upset when they found a beer can in the bush over my brother's grave.
 
2021-06-23 4:34:00 PM  
also, i'm thinking about some sort of golf/cemetery mash up.
why should all the best areas in the neighborhood only be available to the dead?
 
2021-06-23 4:34:09 PM  
I'm sorry you're sad, losing a loved one is something we all have to deal with at one time or another, but that doesn't give you license to leave any junk you want anywhere you want that you don't own and no one can ever clean it up.
 
2021-06-23 4:37:19 PM  

beezeltown: Cremation. Why involve a cemetery at all?


My mother was cremated and a cemetery is still involved because it's the law here.
 
2021-06-23 4:37:25 PM  
We live in a capitalist society, if they don't like the service they should bring a shovel and take their business elsewhere.
 
2021-06-23 4:37:39 PM  

Gin Buddy: beezeltown: Cremation. Why involve a cemetery at all?


Exactly.

I found one that's even better depending on your health. You can sign up for this service, when you die they collect your body from the hospital/wherever, they strip it like a stolen car and take anything of value, cremate whatever is left, and ship your ashes to whoever/wherever you want. Best part? It's FREE.


Yep, that's the route my wife and I are planning. Hopefully not very soon...
 
2021-06-23 4:42:29 PM  
i.pinimg.comView Full Size
 
2021-06-23 4:43:17 PM  
"Woman Upset After Disposal Of Personal Items From Mother's Gravesite"

Headline is 8 words too long
 
2021-06-23 4:46:38 PM  
God, I farking WISH. My town's municipal cemetery has lazy farks for employees. We've got cheap dollar store shiat all over the farking place from more than a year ago. It looks like a farking dump. Plus everyone's put one those cheap tacky farking solar lights that are $2.50 at Dollar General at their family plot. It's farking ugly and it looks like hell.
 
2021-06-23 4:47:28 PM  
I did landscaping/maintenance at a cemetery during summers in my youth. I found quite a few pipes. What? It was literally my job to remove stuff! What I did with them afterwards was my own business.
 
2021-06-23 4:49:10 PM  
Gravesite Altars are strange but I get that people grieve differently.

I'm going to be incinerated and dumped wherever my next of kin feels is appropriate, and if anyone wants some ashy bits for souvenirs, they are welcome to them.
 
2021-06-23 4:52:30 PM  
We have family plot in Haworth, OK.  The only way to prevent this happening is to build a fence around your plots.  Then, you have to do all the weeding and mowing and upkeep yourself but your personal items are still there.

Choices.
 
2021-06-23 4:53:07 PM  

Conservative Evangelical Millennial Cyclist: I did landscaping/maintenance at a cemetery during summers in my youth. I found quite a few pipes. What? It was literally my job to remove stuff! What I did with them afterwards was my own business.


Started a plumbing business?  Maybe a side gig as a Sherlock Holmes impersonator?  Don't leave us hanging like that.
 
2021-06-23 4:53:30 PM  

talkertopc: beezeltown: Cremation. Why involve a cemetery at all?

My mother was cremated and a cemetery is still involved because it's the law here.


Sarah Connor was cremated in Mexico. Her friends scattered her ashes in the sea.
They stored these weapons here in accordance with her will.
 
2021-06-23 4:54:04 PM  

Miss_Dorothy_Kilgallen: Somaticasual: Why do I picture this woman envisioning the groundskeeper as a cackling, red-clad maniac with horns careening over the plots and laughing maniacally every time he shreds a poor family's sentimental goodbyes?

Reality? A poor groundskeeper had to stop, and unfortunately remove each one. Almost guaranteed that the cemetery sign has a note about whether flowers should be left, etc.

[Fark user image 400x400]


Touche'....
 
2021-06-23 4:54:21 PM  
Why were they mowing inside the mausoleums?   That just doesn't make much sense. You go to your families crypt, visit and remember the deceased that you came to pay respects to.  Any flowers or keepsakes that you wish to leave will be on the shelf when you come back next funeral or visit.  Well unless one of the aunts or uncles feels like taking out dead flowers.  Leave the key with the groundskeepers or get one of the ones from one of the relatives that has one.

/the stuff is always there.
//well unless cousin Jess pawned a little bit of it.
///Sometimes she sleeps there when she's in a bad way due to addiction and has pissed off her mom.
 
2021-06-23 4:54:55 PM  
I've had family members die and then I visited their final resting place, aka the boneyard. Even if no one tells you anything and even if you're too lazy to ask, you can easily see what's allowed and what isn't.

Look around at the other gravesites or tomb thingies, do you see a bunch of crap piled up everywhere? If not then why would you want to create a pile of crap there? Most places I've been to you'll see flowers and/or cards with messages, and even those get picked up on a weekly basis at least.

You're upset you found the stuff in the trash? Don't go looking for things in the trash and you won't find anything there and then you won't be upset. Don't make life more difficult than it needs to be.
 
2021-06-23 4:59:29 PM  

mongbiohazard: I'm sorry you're sad, losing a loved one is something we all have to deal with at one time or another, but that doesn't give you license to leave any junk you want anywhere you want that you don't own and no one can ever clean it up.


Yep. It's just like those roadside memorials that people fight tooth and nail to prevent being cleaned up. That is not your space, the rest of us are paying for it to be cleaned up.
 
2021-06-23 5:00:49 PM  

BigNumber12: mongbiohazard: I'm sorry you're sad, losing a loved one is something we all have to deal with at one time or another, but that doesn't give you license to leave any junk you want anywhere you want that you don't own and no one can ever clean it up.

Yep. It's just like those roadside memorials that people fight tooth and nail to prevent being cleaned up. That is not your space, the rest of us are paying for it to be cleaned up.



They're a nice source of free candles though.
 
2021-06-23 5:02:07 PM  
Until I looked closer at the headline photo, I thought it was another picture of Portland
 
2021-06-23 5:03:55 PM  
We have a tiny little graveyard nearby, that is obviously not corporately owned.  Each family is responsible for upkeep.  My uncle, and later my cousin dumped a load of pea gravel on my grandparents and raked it smooth.

Within a few years, just about every other family had done as well.  Now, when we swing by, if a weed has taken root, it's dealt with quickly.  But, the best part is the azaleas that have been planted over the years are gorgeous.

The driving paths and walk ways are about the only areas with scrub grass holding on.  Still like it better than those manicured lawns with flat stones for mowing ease.
 
2021-06-23 5:04:56 PM  
The entire place would look like a roadside shrine within a month if they didn't take tokens people leave behind away.

My personal preference is that when I'm gone, they burn me (or chose the most environmentally responsible method of corpse disposal available) and, I don't know, plant a tree on top of whatever's left. Or my surviving friends and loved ones a bag of my cremains up their sleeve at all times in case they get in a fight and need to throw something in their opponent's eyes. That'd be pretty rad
 
2021-06-23 5:05:18 PM  

The Devil's Bartender: [i.pinimg.com image 236x354]


I want this but as a fruit tree so that people can consume my flesh after I am dead.
 
2021-06-23 5:05:55 PM  
After my great grandma died, my great grandpa visited her grave every day.  He decided to landscape around the headstone to make things a little nicer.  Just put some stone and edging around it to go with the flowers.  One day one of the groundskeepers comes up to him and asks him to take it down.  Turns out my grandpa did a pretty nice job. People thought the groundskeeper was doing it and were bothering him to do it to their graves too.
 
2021-06-23 5:06:14 PM  
Nothing says I miss you like a moth eaten teddy bear.
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-06-23 5:07:09 PM  

mongbiohazard: I'm sorry you're sad, losing a loved one is something we all have to deal with at one time or another, but that doesn't give you license to leave any junk you want anywhere you want that you don't own and no one can ever clean it up.


We had a kid wrap his car around a telephone pole down the street from my mom's house. The accident site was just over the top of a hill. Two more kids ended up in the hospital after getting hit when they were kneeling in the road just over the hill, praying at the roadside shrine. Super lucky they weren't killed as it's a street folks regularly go 50+ on.
 
2021-06-23 5:11:28 PM  

beezeltown: Cremation. Why involve a cemetery at all?


Yep.  My parents passed last year.  Their urns are buried on the family land but brothers and I still haven't poured the cement and laid the markers.

We're just the worst kids.

/pretty sure my parents don't care much
 
2021-06-23 5:11:50 PM  

The Devil's Bartender: [i.pinimg.com image 236x354]


Is that free range, free GMO, no antibotic burial pods? I only buy all natural.
 
2021-06-23 5:23:20 PM  

buster_v: God, I farking WISH. My town's municipal cemetery has lazy farks for employees. We've got cheap dollar store shiat all over the farking place from more than a year ago. It looks like a farking dump. Plus everyone's put one those cheap tacky farking solar lights that are $2.50 at Dollar General at their family plot. It's farking ugly and it looks like hell.


Are you my neighbor?
 
Izo
2021-06-23 5:27:03 PM  
Last October, a teenager killed himself on a corner of our property.  Stuff appeared on the telephone pole nearby, but we didn't hear about it until a few days later on Halloween, from the trick-or-treaters, because its out of sight of the house, we don't drive out that direction, and it was dealt with in the middle of the night.

The HOA removed the stuff a couple of weeks later after it'd been rained on a few times.

I asked Mr. Izo if we should install some kind of more permanent memorial, he said "hell no, it'll give someone else ideas"  Its a nice little area with nice grass you could lay down and take a nap on. Now i wonder if i should go plant something thorny on it.
 
2021-06-23 5:28:41 PM  
The cemetery where most of my local extended family is buried typically mows Wednesdays and/or Thursdays, depending on the weather. We asked so we don't bring flowers for nothing, as they will toss the flowers so the vases can be recessed back into the plaques before mowing (we have plaques flush with the ground instead of headstones). Most visitors come on the weekends, so that makes sense.

The worst part of cemetery visitation is that other visitors will actively steal existing flowers from a vase to put them their own relatives' vases. It has happened on more than one occasion.

The moral of this story - all cemeteries have to do lawn maintenance, ask before you leave things that you want to be kept. They will tell you about mowing policies and general policies about leaving items. Also, be prepared for your precious items to be stolen, some people just suck.
 
2021-06-23 5:35:42 PM  

buster_v: God, I farking WISH. My town's municipal cemetery has lazy farks for employees. We've got cheap dollar store shiat all over the farking place from more than a year ago. It looks like a farking dump. Plus everyone's put one those cheap tacky farking solar lights that are $2.50 at Dollar General at their family plot. It's farking ugly and it looks like hell.


Solar lights? What, for edgy teenagers who sneak onto the grounds in the middle of the night? I've never been to a cemetery that didn't close at sundown.
 
2021-06-23 5:38:10 PM  

blatz514: beezeltown: Cremation. Why involve a cemetery at all?

Yep.  My parents passed last year.  Their urns are buried on the family land but brothers and I still haven't poured the cement and laid the markers.

We're just the worst kids.

/pretty sure my parents don't care much


Thats ok my grandmother spent almost two years in the trunk of my uncles car because every weekend he was going to go to Ohio and bury her in the family plot, her ashes not her body. My mom finally mailed her to family there to do it.
 
2021-06-23 5:40:43 PM  

The Devil's Bartender: [i.pinimg.com image 236x354]



Pods?

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-06-23 5:44:39 PM  
Turns out leaving personal items was a grave decision.

/here all week (and yes, this is already imprinted on my urn, which is a martini shaker)
 
2021-06-23 5:49:25 PM  
I've been starting to go to cemetery meetings for a small legacy family cemetery that, fortunately, my mother has the last of our family plots in. You think HOAs are bad? They're nothing compared to fundies who are trying to keep undesirables from getting buried next to their racist great-grandfather who fought the war of northern aggression.

4 times a year, we're out there cleaning up because homeless are often leaving their garbage while wandering through. Nobody wants to pony up the money to fix the fence.

As soon as my mother and the last of her siblings die, I'm washing my hands of the place.

Found a cool animal skull there once. No idea what it used to be.
 
2021-06-23 5:50:55 PM  
Yeah, that's pretty common practice.  It's one of the many reason that cemetery fashion shifted away from taller free-standing headstones to ones more level with the ground (or those bronze plates):  ease of mowing, and to present more as a "pleasant memorial garden" than a "stereotypical creepy cemetery."

They don't have infinite space to store all the trinkets you want to leave behind.  If you wanted that object to be with the deceased, put it in the coffin beforehand (or give it to the funeral director to put in the coffin if you can't bear to do it yourself).  That stuff gets nasty over time, and it usually gets thrown out.

/Former mort-sci major.
 
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