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(CNN)   Per CNN: These Cyber Ninjas? Kinda sketchy. Their Legal Department addy on Arizona contract is a UPS Store. Their main addy on contract is vacant. Friend of founder: "He's a lovely person. He's just nuts now"   (edition.cnn.com) divider line
    More: Murica, Joe Biden, Doug Logan, Conspiracy theory, United States Senate, Cyber Ninjas, Phoenix, Arizona, Arizona's largest county, press conference  
•       •       •

2162 clicks; posted to Politics » on 18 Jun 2021 at 5:12 PM (5 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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2021-06-18 12:11:38 PM  
The good news is they're making this such an embarrassing clusterfark even the dwindling number of non-insane GOP officials are running away in droves.

So, when the Cyber Ninjas announce their audit reveals 100% of the people in Maricopa County voted from Trump, but their votes were changed when Hilary used her Soros-Ray from the stealth flying child sex dungeon STILL floating above Phoenix to activate the Chinese nanobamboobots in each ballot, and, and such as, this means Donald Trump (Who Was President All Along But Allowed the Biden Clone to Sit in Washington to Lure Out the Conjoined Lizard/Grays) is now President of not only the United States, but of earth, because the audit found more than seven billion ballots from everyone on earth and hand-delivered by Jesus using the same Holy Briefcase He delivered the perfect constitution to George Washington on July 4, 1776, the only people who'll take their word are the same people who think Mike Lindell doesn't huff the ground-up gym mats he stuffs in his pillows.
 
2021-06-18 2:56:43 PM  
"It's hard to say anything bad about the guy. He's a lovely person. He's just nuts now," .... "It's scary; because if someone like him can turn into this, who can't turn into this?"

Over a third of the goddamn country certainly can.

/And incidentally, this is a good candidate for passive voice: "can be turned" helps route the blame more where it needs to be and focuses the conversation on ringleaders rather than on cult followers' personal failings.
 
2021-06-18 3:38:36 PM  
Also Cyber Ninjas are really just one ninja.

That clown, doing the bidding of the Arizona Senate clowns, who are doing the bidding of Head Clown Donald Trump, then hires subcontractor clowns to do the work for him, including them taking sensitive voter data to a "lab" in Montana that is really the log cabin home of another clown.

/it's a clown show bro
 
2021-06-18 4:34:37 PM  
Our only hope?

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-06-18 5:20:38 PM  
Why did the subby contract to addy? Is that supposed to sound cool? Length limitation?
 
2021-06-18 5:21:39 PM  
I read something the other day to the effect that the Cyber Ninja audit was complete. No announced result. And a 2nd audit had also completed. No announced result. And that they were now on the 3rd audit team.

Since the data apparently are no longer under state control or even in state there any report will have all the coherence of a Boggle toss.
 
2021-06-18 5:25:08 PM  
"The fraud is real!"
Republicans: "This guy seems sane and unbiased. Let's allow him to continue leading an audit & pawing through ballots for panda fur."

"Trump is a dipshiat."
Republicans: "Absolutely partisan witch hunt. I don't care that he was one of dozens of investigators sharing a popular opinion over a private text message, this is clear evidence that the entire investigation is wrong and we can now ignore the thousands of pieces of evidence it uncovered. You're welcome, America."
 
2021-06-18 5:28:05 PM  
People with two first names can NOT be trusted with any IT.


Hey, why can't I log in?!
 
2021-06-18 5:29:45 PM  

Mr. Coffee Nerves: The good news is they're making this such an embarrassing clusterfark even the dwindling number of non-insane GOP officials are running away in droves.

So, when the Cyber Ninjas announce their audit reveals 100% of the people in Maricopa County voted from Trump, but their votes were changed when Hilary used her Soros-Ray from the stealth flying child sex dungeon STILL floating above Phoenix to activate the Chinese nanobamboobots in each ballot, and, and such as, this means Donald Trump (Who Was President All Along But Allowed the Biden Clone to Sit in Washington to Lure Out the Conjoined Lizard/Grays) is now President of not only the United States, but of earth, because the audit found more than seven billion ballots from everyone on earth and hand-delivered by Jesus using the same Holy Briefcase He delivered the perfect constitution to George Washington on July 4, 1776, the only people who'll take their word are the same people who think Mike Lindell doesn't huff the ground-up gym mats he stuffs in his pillows.


Finally someone's been reading my blog.
 
2021-06-18 5:31:15 PM  
Another idiot who will go to jail for Trump.

How nice.
 
2021-06-18 5:34:44 PM  

Mr. Coffee Nerves: The good news is they're making this such an embarrassing clusterfark even the dwindling number of non-insane GOP officials are running away in droves.

So, when the Cyber Ninjas announce their audit reveals 100% of the people in Maricopa County voted from Trump, but their votes were changed when Hilary used her Soros-Ray from the stealth flying child sex dungeon STILL floating above Phoenix to activate the Chinese nanobamboobots in each ballot, and, and such as, this means Donald Trump (Who Was President All Along But Allowed the Biden Clone to Sit in Washington to Lure Out the Conjoined Lizard/Grays) is now President of not only the United States, but of earth, because the audit found more than seven billion ballots from everyone on earth and hand-delivered by Jesus using the same Holy Briefcase He delivered the perfect constitution to George Washington on July 4, 1776, the only people who'll take their word are the same people who think Mike Lindell doesn't huff the ground-up gym mats he stuffs in his pillows.


It's now clear that the intent was never to uncover the nonexistent fraud.

It was to proactively undermine any future recounts or audits by doing what GQPers do best: defiling the process by corrupting it into a farcical circus.

This way when bullshiat is called when the fascists test run open election theft in 2022, the very idea of recounts is pre-discredited in peoples' minds.
 
2021-06-18 5:35:06 PM  

Mr. Coffee Nerves: The good news is they're making this such an embarrassing clusterfark even the dwindling number of non-insane GOP officials are running away in droves.

So, when the Cyber Ninjas announce their audit reveals 100% of the people in Maricopa County voted from Trump, but their votes were changed when Hilary used her Soros-Ray from the stealth flying child sex dungeon STILL floating above Phoenix to activate the Chinese nanobamboobots in each ballot, and, and such as, this means Donald Trump (Who Was President All Along But Allowed the Biden Clone to Sit in Washington to Lure Out the Conjoined Lizard/Grays) is now President of not only the United States, but of earth, because the audit found more than seven billion ballots from everyone on earth and hand-delivered by Jesus using the same Holy Briefcase He delivered the perfect constitution to George Washington on July 4, 1776, the only people who'll take their word are the same people who think Mike Lindell doesn't huff the ground-up gym mats he stuffs in his pillows.


This would make a good Ben Garrison cartoon.
 
2021-06-18 5:36:59 PM  

aleister_greynight: Mr. Coffee Nerves: The good news is they're making this such an embarrassing clusterfark even the dwindling number of non-insane GOP officials are running away in droves.

So, when the Cyber Ninjas announce their audit reveals 100% of the people in Maricopa County voted from Trump, but their votes were changed when Hilary used her Soros-Ray from the stealth flying child sex dungeon STILL floating above Phoenix to activate the Chinese nanobamboobots in each ballot, and, and such as, this means Donald Trump (Who Was President All Along But Allowed the Biden Clone to Sit in Washington to Lure Out the Conjoined Lizard/Grays) is now President of not only the United States, but of earth, because the audit found more than seven billion ballots from everyone on earth and hand-delivered by Jesus using the same Holy Briefcase He delivered the perfect constitution to George Washington on July 4, 1776, the only people who'll take their word are the same people who think Mike Lindell doesn't huff the ground-up gym mats he stuffs in his pillows.

This would make a good Ben Garrison cartoon.


The labelling would be magnificent.
 
2021-06-18 5:37:08 PM  
Good thing they subcontracted part of their audit to sone guy in a cabin in Montana.
 
2021-06-18 5:37:27 PM  
Cobb said he was asked to provide up to 20 people for 14 days to examine the ballot paper, at a rate of $600 a day plus expenses per person and $800 a day for himself. That total, just over $179,000 plus expenses, is more than the Arizona Senate contracted to pay Cyber Ninjas for the audit as a whole: $150,000. As CNN has reported, private partisan sources heavily invested in casting doubt on Biden's election victory claim to have funneled more than $1.6 million to the audit.

Neither Fann, nor the Senate, nor Logan, have said how much in private funding Cyber Ninjas has received or spent. At the April 22 press conference, Logan said he didn't know how much his company was being paid, and didn't want to know, because "I don't want to be influenced."
...
Logan didn't answer questions from CNN about who is accounting for funds received and spent for the audit; about whether he's been approached by legislators from other states to do similar work; about whether his company has an actual office or any full-time employees; about how he and his company came to Fann's attention;...


CNN concerned about dark money going into a fake audit organized by lying Republicans that may present a model for other states' farkery seems a bit paranoid.

Wait. What's the opposite of paranoid? Obvious. That's it! That's what I meant. Obvious farkery to come from this. They rioted at the Capitol to stop this, FFS! of course they're going to fake audit everything from now on.
 
2021-06-18 5:38:53 PM  

erik-k: It's now clear that the intent was never to uncover the nonexistent fraud.


Mp[e.  This is a data-harvesting scam plain and simple.  People from AZ, watch your credit scores, and keep checking for fraudulent 'donations' on your bank statements.

This was an identity theft scam from the start, with all voter data and ALL SSN's and other sensitive data to be turned over to the GQP.
 
2021-06-18 5:41:05 PM  
Our only hope is for the cyber shogun to hire the cyber ninjas as cyber gardeners.
 
2021-06-18 5:41:57 PM  
Summerlin said that in all the years he'd known Logan, before the Arizona audit, "we never, never had a single political conversation; that's what stunned me about this... He said, 'there's definitely something there.' I said, 'based on what?' He said, 'it'll come.' I said, 'you sound like the My Pillow guy.'"

"He said, 'it's wrong they're terminating me,'" Summerlin said. "I said, 'don't be an idiot, of course they're terminating your ass, you work at will.' I said, 'if you get a government contract any time after this, I'll be amazed."


That article made me smile more than a couple times, thanks Subby!
 
2021-06-18 5:42:50 PM  

erik-k: Mr. Coffee Nerves: The good news is they're making this such an embarrassing clusterfark even the dwindling number of non-insane GOP officials are running away in droves.

So, when the Cyber Ninjas announce their audit reveals 100% of the people in Maricopa County voted from Trump, but their votes were changed when Hilary used her Soros-Ray from the stealth flying child sex dungeon STILL floating above Phoenix to activate the Chinese nanobamboobots in each ballot, and, and such as, this means Donald Trump (Who Was President All Along But Allowed the Biden Clone to Sit in Washington to Lure Out the Conjoined Lizard/Grays) is now President of not only the United States, but of earth, because the audit found more than seven billion ballots from everyone on earth and hand-delivered by Jesus using the same Holy Briefcase He delivered the perfect constitution to George Washington on July 4, 1776, the only people who'll take their word are the same people who think Mike Lindell doesn't huff the ground-up gym mats he stuffs in his pillows.

It's now clear that the intent was never to uncover the nonexistent fraud.

It was to proactively undermine any future recounts or audits by doing what GQPers do best: defiling the process by corrupting it into a farcical circus.

This way when bullshiat is called when the fascists test run open election theft in 2022, the very idea of recounts is pre-discredited in peoples' minds.


That's an interesting turn in logic. Most people assume that this is being done to prep for a massive number of challenges in 2022 or 2024. Think the 60+ lawsuits that Trump filed, only for every office in every district.

I don't think people on the left would discount a legit process so easily.
 
2021-06-18 5:46:06 PM  

A Cave Geek: erik-k: It's now clear that the intent was never to uncover the nonexistent fraud.

Mp[e.  This is a data-harvesting scam plain and simple.  People from AZ, watch your credit scores, and keep checking for fraudulent 'donations' on your bank statements.

This was an identity theft scam from the start, with all voter data and ALL SSN's and other sensitive data to be turned over to the GQP.


That's the part that should scare a hell of a lot of folks. If you voted against Trump in Arizona, I'd strongly suggest a credit monitoring service.
 
2021-06-18 5:46:49 PM  

thehellisthis: Our only hope is for the cyber shogun to hire the cyber ninjas as cyber gardeners.


Wait, if their leader was deposed, doesn't that make them Cyber Ronin? Or is that role change just a "guideline" and not a fast-set rule, like the pirates do.
 
2021-06-18 5:47:21 PM  
With the word "audit" in sarcastiquotes, LOL, CNN.
 
2021-06-18 5:47:55 PM  
FTA : pressing "3" for sales led to the answering message for Logan. So did pressing "4" for human resources. And pressing "5" for purchasing.

And judging from his picture, I'm guessing he also cuts his own hair.
 
2021-06-18 5:50:14 PM  
Some people blame the GQP for this, but I blame Garland for not putting a stop to it, and Biden for handing an elitist Republican absolute power.
 
2021-06-18 5:50:59 PM  

foo monkey: Our only hope?

[Fark user image 231x218]


y.yarn.coView Full Size
 
2021-06-18 5:52:14 PM  

FormlessOne: A Cave Geek: erik-k: It's now clear that the intent was never to uncover the nonexistent fraud.

Mp[e.  This is a data-harvesting scam plain and simple.  People from AZ, watch your credit scores, and keep checking for fraudulent 'donations' on your bank statements.

This was an identity theft scam from the start, with all voter data and ALL SSN's and other sensitive data to be turned over to the GQP.

That's the part that should scare a hell of a lot of folks. If you voted against Trump in Arizona, I'd strongly suggest a credit monitoring service.


Why would they limit to people that voted against Trump? The ones that voted for him are less likely to see that they are being ripped off. They probably have access to all the votes.
 
2021-06-18 5:52:21 PM  
They're not going to announce anything until about a month before the midterms, then announce something space and vague, which will be amplified to the point of it being outright fraud, and then after the midterms there's silence but that'll be used to do another round of audits starting in Jan 2023
 
2021-06-18 5:53:42 PM  

muck1969: FTA : pressing "3" for sales led to the answering message for Logan. So did pressing "4" for human resources. And pressing "5" for purchasing.

And judging from his picture, I'm guessing he also cuts his own hair.


Corporate Zoom meetings are just Logan talking to himself and rotating between several cameras, with AI triggered smoke bombs filling in the blanks.
 
2021-06-18 5:54:19 PM  

foo monkey: Our only hope?

[Fark user image 231x218]


Aaaand we're done here.

Aarrrrr.
 
2021-06-18 5:54:54 PM  

FormlessOne: A Cave Geek: erik-k: It's now clear that the intent was never to uncover the nonexistent fraud.

Mp[e.  This is a data-harvesting scam plain and simple.  People from AZ, watch your credit scores, and keep checking for fraudulent 'donations' on your bank statements.

This was an identity theft scam from the start, with all voter data and ALL SSN's and other sensitive data to be turned over to the GQP.

That's the part that should scare a hell of a lot of folks. If you voted against Trump in Arizona, I'd strongly suggest a credit monitoring service.


Because the ninjas are so principled they won't fark with people who voted for Trump. Right.
 
2021-06-18 5:56:49 PM  

Phaedrus the Vague: muck1969: FTA : pressing "3" for sales led to the answering message for Logan. So did pressing "4" for human resources. And pressing "5" for purchasing.

And judging from his picture, I'm guessing he also cuts his own hair.

Corporate Zoom meetings are just Logan talking to himself and rotating between several cameras, with AI triggered smoke bombs filling in the blanks.


Well you have to access it via OnlyFans so that makes sense.
 
2021-06-18 5:57:53 PM  
This was a fraud the second they announced that they would only be auditing Maricopa County.
 
2021-06-18 5:58:43 PM  
It's not hard to say something bad about the people involved in this sham. The people profiting from it are assholes. The people paying for it are assholes. The people encouraging it are assholes. The people who continue to call it an audit instead of what it is -- a tantrum by Arizona's racist assholes -- are assholes.

Basically, it's assholes all the way down.
 
2021-06-18 5:58:59 PM  
Hint : If someone tells you they're a Ninja , They're not ..
 
2021-06-18 6:00:38 PM  

mikalmd: Hint : If someone tells you they're a Ninja , They're not ..


What if you can't see them? Only hear them.
 
2021-06-18 6:01:19 PM  
"Doug may not have thought it all the way through," she said."

Ya think?
 
2021-06-18 6:03:41 PM  

UncleDirtNap: Phaedrus the Vague: muck1969: FTA : pressing "3" for sales led to the answering message for Logan. So did pressing "4" for human resources. And pressing "5" for purchasing.

And judging from his picture, I'm guessing he also cuts his own hair.

Corporate Zoom meetings are just Logan talking to himself and rotating between several cameras, with AI triggered smoke bombs filling in the blanks.

Well you have to access it via OnlyFans so that makes sense.


lol, I'd almost pay to see that. But really I'd pirate it.
 
2021-06-18 6:04:44 PM  

A Cave Geek: erik-k: It's now clear that the intent was never to uncover the nonexistent fraud.

Mp[e.  This is a data-harvesting scam plain and simple.  People from AZ, watch your credit scores, and keep checking for fraudulent 'donations' on your bank statements.

This was an identity theft scam from the start, with all voter data and ALL SSN's and other sensitive data to be turned over to the GQP.


That's what the cameras and "server" was for.
 
2021-06-18 6:07:54 PM  
This "audit" had several goals.  None were to check the integrity of the last election.
1) was to massage Donald Trump's ego. He felt bad for losing, and the idea  of fraud makes him feel less bad.
2) millions of dollars ended up in the pocket of a random asshole.  Some of that money will end up in the bank accounts of Arizona Republicans.
3) GOP members of other states will use this as a rallying cry for the next decade.  They will cry fraud anytime they lose.
 
2021-06-18 6:09:59 PM  

Mr. Coffee Nerves: The good news is they're making this such an embarrassing clusterfark even the dwindling number of non-insane GOP officials are running away in droves.

So, when the Cyber Ninjas announce their audit reveals 100% of the people in Maricopa County voted from Trump, but their votes were changed when Hilary used her Soros-Ray from the stealth flying child sex dungeon STILL floating above Phoenix to activate the Chinese nanobamboobots in each ballot, and, and such as, this means Donald Trump (Who Was President All Along But Allowed the Biden Clone to Sit in Washington to Lure Out the Conjoined Lizard/Grays) is now President of not only the United States, but of earth, because the audit found more than seven billion ballots from everyone on earth and hand-delivered by Jesus using the same Holy Briefcase He delivered the perfect constitution to George Washington on July 4, 1776, the only people who'll take their word are the same people who think Mike Lindell doesn't huff the ground-up gym mats he stuffs in his pillows.


Sadly enough I read that, and think, "Hmm - yeah sounds about accurate."

/it's like Dr. Tannis without the genius
 
2021-06-18 6:15:43 PM  

Mr. Coffee Nerves: The good news is they're making this such an embarrassing clusterfark even the dwindling number of non-insane GOP officials are running away in droves.

So, when the Cyber Ninjas announce their audit reveals 100% of the people in Maricopa County voted from Trump, but their votes were changed when Hilary used her Soros-Ray from the stealth flying child sex dungeon STILL floating above Phoenix to activate the Chinese nanobamboobots in each ballot, and, and such as, this means Donald Trump (Who Was President All Along But Allowed the Biden Clone to Sit in Washington to Lure Out the Conjoined Lizard/Grays) is now President of not only the United States, but of earth, because the audit found more than seven billion ballots from everyone on earth and hand-delivered by Jesus using the same Holy Briefcase He delivered the perfect constitution to George Washington on July 4, 1776, the only people who'll take their word are the same people who think Mike Lindell doesn't huff the ground-up gym mats he stuffs in his pillows.


This is oddly specific.
 
2021-06-18 6:20:27 PM  
Why are Americans so concerned with voter fraud?  Looking ahead I don't think there is going to be much voting going on there in the future.
 
2021-06-18 6:30:29 PM  
What's the Latin for "Who will audit the auditors?"
 
2021-06-18 6:31:05 PM  
Wow. Their addres tactic is the same that the CIA uses for shell companies. It is also the same that corporations use to become shell corps and offshore assets. There is nothing shady about that. it's a American steragtegy that is not only legitimate there, but the USA really does their run family wealth and federal law enforcement that way. That PO Box addressing and vacant lease are fundamental to the US justice sytem and finances.

Try to keep up, it's only been like that since...well since the Capone Era (prior to the CIA's creation), but it got big and politically acceptable in the 1970s.
 
2021-06-18 6:38:58 PM  

erik-k: Mr. Coffee Nerves: The good news is they're making this such an embarrassing clusterfark even the dwindling number of non-insane GOP officials are running away in droves.

So, when the Cyber Ninjas announce their audit reveals 100% of the people in Maricopa County voted from Trump, but their votes were changed when Hilary used her Soros-Ray from the stealth flying child sex dungeon STILL floating above Phoenix to activate the Chinese nanobamboobots in each ballot, and, and such as, this means Donald Trump (Who Was President All Along But Allowed the Biden Clone to Sit in Washington to Lure Out the Conjoined Lizard/Grays) is now President of not only the United States, but of earth, because the audit found more than seven billion ballots from everyone on earth and hand-delivered by Jesus using the same Holy Briefcase He delivered the perfect constitution to George Washington on July 4, 1776, the only people who'll take their word are the same people who think Mike Lindell doesn't huff the ground-up gym mats he stuffs in his pillows.

It's now clear that the intent was never to uncover the nonexistent fraud.

It was to proactively undermine any future recounts or audits by doing what GQPers do best: defiling the process by corrupting it into a farcical circus.

This way when bullshiat is called when the fascists test run open election theft in 2022, the very idea of recounts is pre-discredited in peoples' minds.


MGS2 was prophetic.
Metal Gear Solid 2: Sons of Liberty - Colonel A.I speech about information Warfare
Youtube C31XYgr8gp0
 
2021-06-18 6:41:44 PM  
You will never catch the Cyber Ninjas.

media.tenor.comView Full Size
 
2021-06-18 6:44:13 PM  
Merrick Garland could ask questions. But he won't
 
2021-06-18 6:44:20 PM  
And the federal response continues to be zilch.
 
2021-06-18 6:45:25 PM  

austerity101: And the federal response continues to be zilch.


The Founding Fathers never thought we need a clown clause.
 
2021-06-18 6:46:41 PM  

Mr. Coffee Nerves: The good news is they're making this such an embarrassing clusterfark even the dwindling number of non-insane GOP officials are running away in droves.

So, when the Cyber Ninjas announce their audit reveals 100% of the people in Maricopa County voted from Trump, but their votes were changed when Hilary used her Soros-Ray from the stealth flying child sex dungeon STILL floating above Phoenix to activate the Chinese nanobamboobots in each ballot, and, and such as, this means Donald Trump (Who Was President All Along But Allowed the Biden Clone to Sit in Washington to Lure Out the Conjoined Lizard/Grays) is now President of not only the United States, but of earth, because the audit found more than seven billion ballots from everyone on earth and hand-delivered by Jesus using the same Holy Briefcase He delivered the perfect constitution to George Washington on July 4, 1776, the only people who'll take their word are the same people who think Mike Lindell doesn't huff the ground-up gym mats he stuffs in his pillows.


-
...nanobamboobots...

Hee, hee, giggle, snort...
 
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