Skip to content
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Kotaku)   So, which e3 character should Batman take notes from   (kotaku.com) divider line
    More: Amusing, Mario, Luigi, Super Mario 64 DS, heart of hearts, Super Mario 64, Charles Martinet, Super Mario Bros., Shigeru Miyamoto  
•       •       •

853 clicks; posted to Fandom » on 17 Jun 2021 at 2:55 PM (7 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



29 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2021-06-17 12:43:57 PM  
The one who cares if his partner gets off enough to do something about it.
 
2021-06-17 3:00:19 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-06-17 3:05:51 PM  
Peter Quill is into some freaky sh*t and I respect the hell out of him for that (something I would never say for the MCU version of Quill). He's probably obnoxious about it though, insisting that he can only get in the mood to mouth your mound if he can listen to his favorite '80s mixtape while doing it. Expect to hear a lot more Bonnie Tyler than in theGuardians of the Galaxytrailer.

Yeah, Peter Quill eats ass.  Zero doubt there.
 
2021-06-17 3:21:54 PM  
Someone got paid for this.
 
2021-06-17 3:25:36 PM  
Funny, this type of silly discussion is why video games had to be "saved" and colonized by internet warriors. I hope the irony is not lost.
 
2021-06-17 3:29:12 PM  
scontent-atl3-1.xx.fbcdn.netView Full Size
 
2021-06-17 4:28:19 PM  
This is the best fictional character controversy since the debate over Tonks from Harry Potter growing a dick because she was a shape-shifting witch of sorts.

/Bruce wouldn't even have a chance to say no, Cat Woman would jump on his face and Bruce would just learn to snorkel
//which he would already have in his bat-sex-belt
///he has a plan for everything
 
2021-06-17 4:32:36 PM  

AppleOptionEsc: This is the best fictional character controversy since the debate over Tonks from Harry Potter growing a dick because she was a shape-shifting witch of sorts.

/Bruce wouldn't even have a chance to say no, Cat Woman would jump on his face and Bruce would just learn to snorkel
//which he would already have in his bat-sex-belt
///he has a plan for everything


He wouldn't need a Bat Snorkel (the Banorkel?)

He'd have a fully animatronic SexBotMan body double thing at the ready.

Or just have Alfred standing there in his mask.
 
2021-06-17 5:02:31 PM  
Pretty sure it got scrubbed for...reasons, but yesterday Dave Cockrum's son posted a page from his dad's private sketchbook of Nightcrawler going down on Storm. So, add the swashbuckler with a prehensile tail to the list of super heroes who dine at the Y.

Oh wait...here it is (SOOPER NSFW!!!!!)
 
2021-06-17 5:08:37 PM  

xalres: Pretty sure it got scrubbed for...reasons, but yesterday Dave Cockrum's son posted a page from his dad's private sketchbook of Nightcrawler going down on Storm. So, add the swashbuckler with a prehensile tail to the list of super heroes who dine at the Y.

Oh wait...here it is (SOOPER NSFW!!!!!)


Not the perspective I was anticipating, to be honest.
 
2021-06-17 5:10:10 PM  
This wouldn't be nearly as stupid if they hadn't added a Batman-Batgirl sex scene to The Killing Joke.

THEN I might buy their "we don't want kids seeing their role models have sex" excuse.  But as-is, it's utter hypocrisy.

/maybe your kids shouldn't be watching the Harley Quinn show anyway
 
2021-06-17 5:12:49 PM  

skyotter: This wouldn't be nearly as stupid if they hadn't added a Batman-Batgirl sex scene to The Killing Joke.

THEN I might buy their "we don't want kids seeing their role models have sex" excuse.  But as-is, it's utter hypocrisy.

/maybe your kids shouldn't be watching the Harley Quinn show anyway


I really tried watching that show, and I liked parts of it, but holy fjork the swearing was really really distracting. It was worse than the belching in early Rick and Morty episodes. Does it get better?

It's like they went the route video games took, where "mature" just means "Moar tiddies and F-Bombs!"
 
2021-06-17 5:17:12 PM  

xalres: skyotter: This wouldn't be nearly as stupid if they hadn't added a Batman-Batgirl sex scene to The Killing Joke.

THEN I might buy their "we don't want kids seeing their role models have sex" excuse.  But as-is, it's utter hypocrisy.

/maybe your kids shouldn't be watching the Harley Quinn show anyway

I really tried watching that show, and I liked parts of it, but holy fjork the swearing was really really distracting. It was worse than the belching in early Rick and Morty episodes. Does it get better?

It's like they went the route video games took, where "mature" just means "Moar tiddies and F-Bombs!"


It gets better by episode fouri...ish? Really finds a nice groove.
 
2021-06-17 5:31:48 PM  

xalres: skyotter: This wouldn't be nearly as stupid if they hadn't added a Batman-Batgirl sex scene to The Killing Joke.

THEN I might buy their "we don't want kids seeing their role models have sex" excuse.  But as-is, it's utter hypocrisy.

/maybe your kids shouldn't be watching the Harley Quinn show anyway

I really tried watching that show, and I liked parts of it, but holy fjork the swearing was really really distracting. It was worse than the belching in early Rick and Morty episodes. Does it get better?

It's like they went the route video games took, where "mature" just means "Moar tiddies and F-Bombs!"


The show takes a few episodes to find its voice. After a while the swearing feels more in character and sounds like the way actual adults talk rather than kids playing Xbox online.

The dialogue becomes a lot sharper and funnier. It's still absolutely not for kids, but it stops trying so hard and just embraces what it is.
 
2021-06-17 5:52:34 PM  

xalres: Pretty sure it got scrubbed for...reasons, but yesterday Dave Cockrum's son posted a page from his dad's private sketchbook of Nightcrawler going down on Storm. So, add the swashbuckler with a prehensile tail to the list of super heroes who dine at the Y.

Oh wait...here it is (SOOPER NSFW!!!!!)


Whar Oglaf Whar?
 
2021-06-17 7:25:39 PM  
Mario.
Fark user imageView Full Size


/do The Mario
//swing your arms
///from side to side
 
2021-06-17 7:37:52 PM  
Ah Kotaku, still pioneering ethics in games journalism.

Isn't Alex Chen like, fourteen?
 
2021-06-17 7:45:43 PM  
Maybe they just have not seen a real vagina and don't know what it looks like?
 
2021-06-17 8:43:22 PM  
Samus is always heading down to Lower Norfair.  Nice.
 
2021-06-17 8:47:26 PM  
That depends: Which one is out of the closet?

I remember playing the ending of Batman: Arkham City, where the supposed love of Batman's life is killed by the Joker, just before the Joker dies from some disease, after accidentally shattering the cure. Batman admits to him that, even after all the death and mayhem, he still would have given him the cure. And then he proceeds to leave his "love" to rot, picks up The Joker, and walks all the way out of Arkham City with his corpse cradled in his arms.

I remember thinking, "Huh. I never realized. That explains all his failed relationships with women."
 
2021-06-17 9:10:01 PM  

skyotter: Peter Quill is into some freaky sh*t and I respect the hell out of him for that (something I would never say for the MCU version of Quill). He's probably obnoxious about it though, insisting that he can only get in the mood to mouth your mound if he can listen to his favorite '80s mixtape while doing it. Expect to hear a lot more Bonnie Tyler than in theGuardians of the Galaxytrailer.

Yeah, Peter Quill eats ass.  Zero doubt there.


With the game haircut i think he talks more than he walks.

But Waluigi has the right equipment for dual stimulation. He's the Rabbit (tm) of marital devices.
 
2021-06-17 9:23:44 PM  
No Yoshi?
 
2021-06-18 12:28:06 AM  

NuclearPenguins: No Yoshi?


Yoshi eats everything.
 
2021-06-18 10:27:38 AM  

palelizard: NuclearPenguins: No Yoshi?

Yoshi eats everything.


mms.businesswire.comView Full Size
 
2021-06-18 10:51:54 AM  

Two16: palelizard: NuclearPenguins: No Yoshi?

Yoshi eats everything.

[mms.businesswire.com image 850x425]


Kirby just sucks. Yoshi uses the tongue.
 
2021-06-18 11:19:59 AM  
How did I not expect such a lowbrow piece of trash article from Kotaku?

Hey, I love oral sex, but making an entire article about video game characters going down? That reeks of hardcore gamer sweat, which is the kind of sweat you get when you don't have sex but would very much like to some day if anyone could get past the smell.

Kotaku hires some awful writers. Awful.
 
2021-06-18 1:09:08 PM  
I think she'd be a little nervous about oral sex but would, in time, come to enjoy it.

I don't give a fark about the 'ethics in video game journalism' crowd and I get the writer was trying to make jokes playing off of the dumb DC controversy but that line is made me actually cringe.
 
2021-06-18 5:22:11 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-06-18 10:07:07 PM  

WilderKWight: How did I not expect such a lowbrow piece of trash article from Kotaku?

Hey, I love oral sex, but making an entire article about video game characters going down? That reeks of hardcore gamer sweat, which is the kind of sweat you get when you don't have sex but would very much like to some day if anyone could get past the smell.

Kotaku hires some awful writers. Awful.


I believe it was satire. Not particularly funny, but it was Kotaku.
 
Displayed 29 of 29 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking




On Twitter


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.