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(Reuters)   Man arrested in Angola with 1,304 uncut diamonds in his intestines; he was taken to hospital, where they were "removed"   ( divider line
    More: Amusing  
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3039 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Feb 2002 at 10:17 AM (16 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

21 Comments     (+0 »)
2002-02-12 10:22:40 AM  
Anybody else thinking of Marathon Man?
2002-02-12 10:23:43 AM  
And here I thought it was amusing when my cat ate a rubber band and later had poop with handles. This one takes the cake.
2002-02-12 10:27:30 AM  
I betcha he cannot eat 50 hard boiled eggs like Cool Hand Luke
2002-02-12 10:28:52 AM  
Aight lets get all the Jokes out of the way:

Man and I thought the corn I had the other day came out rough...

Mom always said I could cut glass with my farts...

Everyone wants my shiat...
2002-02-12 10:30:04 AM  
And they said his shiat would never be valuable...
2002-02-12 10:35:40 AM  
oh good lord,

well... he'll be useless in prison. Much too loose for any fun.
2002-02-12 10:37:16 AM  
Hah, what a dumb bastard. How did they find him out?
2002-02-12 10:41:32 AM  
Dammit! When I said I wanted a Scotch on the rocks, this is NOT what I meant.
2002-02-12 10:42:05 AM  
02-12-02 10:23:43 AM DigitaldevilAnd here I thought it was amusing when my cat ate a rubber band and later had poop with handles. This one takes the cake.
I once pulled an eight-inch string from my cat. I have no idea how the hell the poor furball managed to get it all the way to the end, but I do agree...THIS definitely outdoes anything cats or other such animals could EVER do.

Did this dumb bastard really think this was a good idea?
2002-02-12 10:53:09 AM  
I knew a girl that could squeeze coal into diamonds with her butt cheeks. Nice girl...
2002-02-12 11:00:42 AM  
It's just not Christmas without the cat parading around with tinsel sticking out of it's butt.
2002-02-12 11:16:42 AM  
so the moral of the story is... next time make the cat transport the diamonds.
2002-02-12 11:40:29 AM  
My 90 pound dog at a blanket. The whole thing. He was in the yard trying to squeeze out poo and blanket, but the long threads were keeping it hanging. So it was kind of like chasing his tail, except when he fell down. Then poo smeared on him. He's white. After a while I finished wretching and held my breath, grabbed onto the threads with a trash bag and his eyes got really wide as he ran away flipping funnily. 3 feet of thread/blanket/poo string came out.

he was hungry afterwards.
2002-02-12 12:08:49 PM  
Wow, NaTaX, im gonna have to teach My dog that trick!
2002-02-12 12:17:38 PM  
Well, so much for free enterprise.

-he who stacks pork
2002-02-12 12:18:13 PM  
Ah, nothing gets the good FARK threads rolling like stories of ingesting items not meant for human or animal consumption, combined with large amounts of unnatural items in the human digestive tract.


[image from too old to be available]
2002-02-12 01:19:13 PM  
Those airport searches are getting pretty thorough when they start searching intestines.
2002-02-12 01:43:08 PM  
And as I'm sure this guy can tell you, DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER.

"Baby, I carried this huge diamond in my ass all the way from the Congo for you sweetheart!"
2002-02-12 02:30:33 PM  
Obviously the guy was narced out.
Probably tried bogarting the profit.
2002-02-12 03:00:40 PM  
While he wins high marks on thoughtfulness and expensiveness, the presentation score for his valentine left much to be desired.
2002-02-12 03:18:23 PM  
"Do you expect me to confess?"
"No, Mr. guy from Angola, I expect you to die!"
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