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(Media Matters)   "Juneteenth will supplant the Fourth of July," claims the sentient klan hood anally controlling Tucker Carlson   (mediamatters.org) divider line
    More: Murica, United States, new Independence Day, Old One, Carlson, country  
•       •       •

1144 clicks; posted to Politics » on 17 Jun 2021 at 2:04 AM (5 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



181 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


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2021-06-16 10:10:30 PM  
Yes, you blithering trust-fund racist idiot, just like no one ever celebrates Christmas because it's too close to the New Year.
 
2021-06-16 10:14:19 PM  
So does this mean it's ok to have a cookout that day?

I never know if a holiday is a cookout holiday until the sales posters go up at the ShopRite.
 
2021-06-16 10:16:24 PM  
From the Wikis:

On the evening of 7 April 1775, [Samuel Johnson] made a famous statement: "Patriotism is the last refuge of the scoundrel."

The line was not, as is widely believed, about patriotism in general but rather what Johnson saw as the false use of the term "patriotism" by William Pitt, 1st Earl of Chatham (the patriot minister) and his supporters. Johnson opposed "self-professed patriots" in general but valued what he considered "true" self-professed patriotism.
 
2021-06-16 10:20:40 PM  
We have a horribly low number of holidays in the US and this idiot wants to complain about getting a new one? Whoever slapped the stupid into that mans head should be commended for a job well done.
 
2021-06-16 10:46:48 PM  
There's a difference between celebrating independence, and celebrating freedom.  I grew up not knowing what Juneteenth was until only about a decade ago, but now if it became the de facto day of celebration of American freedom I'd be fine with that.
 
2021-06-16 11:28:43 PM  
Can there be less fireworks?

I'm sooooo done with fireworks.
 
2021-06-16 11:30:09 PM  
I literally explained what Juneteenth was to a friend tonight. It's recognition is long overdue and nobody is complaining that we have too many holidays. Except for Jehovah's Witnesses.
 
2021-06-16 11:53:52 PM  
I can't pretend to be surprised that the heir to a frozen dinner megafortune is 'calendar sensitive' about his BBQ plans.
 
2021-06-17 1:24:45 AM  
I mean, we can celebrate both, right?

Two days of pyrotechnics and booze? Sign me up
 
2021-06-17 1:36:23 AM  
Let's compromise, and have one holiday celebrating Independence Day and Juneteenth stretching from June 19th to July 4th.

/As an added bonus, move all elections to that period as well
 
2021-06-17 2:08:43 AM  
Excerpt from Tucker:

"Happy that my bill to recognize Juneteenth as a national holiday just passed the Senate," wrote John Cornyn, a supposedly conservative senator from Texas.

I get that Tucker is butthurt about this holiday, but how does voting to make Juneteenth a holiday run counter to conservative values?
 
2021-06-17 2:08:52 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-06-17 2:09:26 AM  
As long as it doesn't overrun Bastille Day.
 
2021-06-17 2:09:41 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
wait till he gets a load of thicc moranis
 
2021-06-17 2:09:58 AM  
Flag Day is closer if you like to combine fearmongering with efficiency
 
2021-06-17 2:10:05 AM  

Dustin_00: Can there be less fireworks?

I'm sooooo done with fireworks.


Bubbles are available?
 
2021-06-17 2:12:53 AM  
My standard response to anything Lord Fishsticks says applies here...

img.ifunny.coView Full Size
 
2021-06-17 2:13:30 AM  
Shut the fark up Tucker.

You're so stupid.
 
2021-06-17 2:14:18 AM  
There should be a new national holiday when this asshole goes away.
 
2021-06-17 2:14:28 AM  

bloobeary: So does this mean it's ok to have a cookout that day?

I never know if a holiday is a cookout holiday until the sales posters go up at the ShopRite.


Every holiday is a cookout holiday.
 
2021-06-17 2:15:31 AM  
He seems unaware of all the Americans who were already celebrating Juneteenth, and it hasn't replaced the 4th of July yet.
 
2021-06-17 2:16:20 AM  

spaceherpes: [Fark user image image 425x531]wait till he gets a load of thicc moranis


I hate you for posting that.

/Still LOL'd.
//Holy shiat!
 
2021-06-17 2:17:29 AM  

The_Sponge: spaceherpes: [Fark user image image 425x531]wait till he gets a load of thicc moranis

I hate you for posting that.

/Still LOL'd.
//Holy shiat!


I can take the hate 🤣
 
2021-06-17 2:18:15 AM  
And? So? What?

Tucker Carlson eats puppies while they're being born. Why would I listen to someone like that? I mean, this psychopath forcibly breeds animals and then eagerly awaits their birth just so he can lurk at a dog's vagina bib, fork, and knife all ready - it's disgusting that we let someone like this host a television show today, but that's today's liberal controlled America I guess.
 
2021-06-17 2:18:23 AM  

dildo tontine: I literally explained what Juneteenth was to a friend tonight. It's recognition is long overdue and nobody is complaining that we have too many holidays. Except for Jehovah's Witnesses.


And a farker in the other thread.

/ in fairness, said farker may well be Witness, for all I know
 
2021-06-17 2:19:06 AM  

rosekolodny: He seems unaware of all the Americans who were already celebrating Juneteenth, and it hasn't replaced the 4th of July yet.


He seems unaware of a great deal of things.
 
2021-06-17 2:19:25 AM  
I really wanted this to be something new, like "the series of Russian Matryoshka dolls anally controlling Tucker Carlson".
 
2021-06-17 2:21:01 AM  

Mrtraveler01: Excerpt from Tucker:

"Happy that my bill to recognize Juneteenth as a national holiday just passed the Senate," wrote John Cornyn, a supposedly conservative senator from Texas.

I get that Tucker is butthurt about this holiday, but how does voting to make Juneteenth a holiday run counter to conservative values?


Most of the Republicans voted for this, so it'll be real fun watching conservatives tear each other to pieces over it.
 
2021-06-17 2:22:34 AM  

fragMasterFlash: We have a horribly low number of holidays in the US and this idiot wants to complain about getting a new one? Whoever slapped the stupid into that mans head should be commended for a job well done.


I think he was born with the stupid.

>After college, Carlson tried to join the Central Intelligence Agency, but his application was denied, after which he decided to pursue a career in journalism with the encouragement of his father, who advised him that "they'll take anybody." (from his Wikipedia page)

Between this and the on-air dressing down from Jon Stewart, it's no wonder he could only find a home at Fox News.
 
2021-06-17 2:25:58 AM  

spaceherpes: [Fark user image image 425x531]wait till he gets a load of thicc moranis


encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.comView Full Size
 
2021-06-17 2:26:34 AM  

MrBallou: From the Wikis:

On the evening of 7 April 1775, [Samuel Johnson] made a famous statement: "Patriotism is the last refuge of the scoundrel."

The line was not, as is widely believed, about patriotism in general but rather what Johnson saw as the false use of the term "patriotism" by William Pitt, 1st Earl of Chatham (the patriot minister) and his supporters. Johnson opposed "self-professed patriots" in general but valued what he considered "true" self-professed patriotism.


"In Dr. Johnson's famous dictionary patriotism is defined as the last resort of a scoundrel. With all due respect to an enlightened but inferior lexicographer I beg to submit that it is the first."
-- Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary, in the entry for "patriotism"
 
2021-06-17 2:27:51 AM  

spaceherpes: The_Sponge: spaceherpes: [Fark user image image 425x531]wait till he gets a load of thicc moranis

I hate you for posting that.

/Still LOL'd.
//Holy shiat!

I can take the hate 🤣


Lulz.

If I quit the internet soon, it's your fault.

/Damn.
//Wow...just wow.
 
2021-06-17 2:30:20 AM  
Better yet we should just have Juneteenth through the Fourth off.
 
2021-06-17 2:32:52 AM  

Mrtraveler01: Excerpt from Tucker:

"Happy that my bill to recognize Juneteenth as a national holiday just passed the Senate," wrote John Cornyn, a supposedly conservative senator from Texas.

I get that Tucker is butthurt about this holiday, but how does voting to make Juneteenth a holiday run counter to conservative values?


It acknowledges that the abolition of slavery is a good thing to be remembered and celebrated, while true conservatives would like nothing better than have it reinstated and put those people back in their place.
 
2021-06-17 2:36:07 AM  
I would literally take from Juneteenth to the Fourth off every year.
 
2021-06-17 2:40:00 AM  
It would have been nice not to have this turn into another mattress day sale holiday, but I guess that's already not to be.
 
2021-06-17 2:41:05 AM  

Mrtraveler01: Excerpt from Tucker:

"Happy that my bill to recognize Juneteenth as a national holiday just passed the Senate," wrote John Cornyn, a supposedly conservative senator from Texas.

I get that Tucker is butthurt about this holiday, but how does voting to make Juneteenth a holiday run counter to conservative values?


Never forget that Tucker's not ACTUALLY butthurt about most stuff.  It's performative bullfark.  He finds an angle, some new red meat to toss, and them does so.

He did it because he figures that the Repugs who voted yes are the ones who miscalculated.  That FoxNation/TrumpMerica is more inherently racist then those people calculated.  So he can whip 'em up nicely over this and reassure' em that nobody thinks more in line with them than good ol' Tucker.
 
2021-06-17 2:44:06 AM  

Kris_Romm: Mrtraveler01: Excerpt from Tucker:

"Happy that my bill to recognize Juneteenth as a national holiday just passed the Senate," wrote John Cornyn, a supposedly conservative senator from Texas.

I get that Tucker is butthurt about this holiday, but how does voting to make Juneteenth a holiday run counter to conservative values?

Never forget that Tucker's not ACTUALLY butthurt about most stuff.  It's performative bullfark.  He finds an angle, some new red meat to toss, and them does so.



That seems awfully deep for the poster child for Resting Tuck Face.
 
2021-06-17 2:46:23 AM  

Mrtraveler01: Excerpt from Tucker:

"Happy that my bill to recognize Juneteenth as a national holiday just passed the Senate," wrote John Cornyn, a supposedly conservative senator from Texas.

I get that Tucker is butthurt about this holiday, but how does voting to make Juneteenth a holiday run counter to conservative values?


Oh, you sweet summer child.
 
2021-06-17 2:48:23 AM  

ArcadianRefugee: dildo tontine: I literally explained what Juneteenth was to a friend tonight. It's recognition is long overdue and nobody is complaining that we have too many holidays. Except for Jehovah's Witnesses.

And a farker in the other thread.

/ in fairness, said farker may well be Witness, for all I know


I don't think they're that fashionable.
 
2021-06-17 2:50:23 AM  

Excelsior: Kris_Romm: Mrtraveler01: Excerpt from Tucker:

"Happy that my bill to recognize Juneteenth as a national holiday just passed the Senate," wrote John Cornyn, a supposedly conservative senator from Texas.

I get that Tucker is butthurt about this holiday, but how does voting to make Juneteenth a holiday run counter to conservative values?

Never forget that Tucker's not ACTUALLY butthurt about most stuff.  It's performative bullfark.  He finds an angle, some new red meat to toss, and them does so.


That seems awfully deep for the poster child for Resting Tuck Face.


You think between stupid and evil that stupid is the more likely explanation for him?

He knows how to manipulate his sheep. Always go lower.  It actually is a strategy you don't have to be that clever to use.
 
2021-06-17 2:57:11 AM  
fark Tucker, Tucker sucks. A flag is nothing but a symbol and I'll leave symbols to the symbol minded.
 
2021-06-17 2:58:00 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-06-17 3:03:48 AM  
The amount of interest or concern Fark is showing about Tucker Carlson being controlled by things in his bottom is getting to unhealthy levels.
 
2021-06-17 3:05:28 AM  
His writer glommed upon "black Independence Day" and went full farking idiot.
 
2021-06-17 3:06:10 AM  
I'd like to celebrate a holiday where Tucker Carlson is shoved down an upward traveling escalator, and falls in perpetuity.

We can call it "Imbecile Tumbling Day".
 
2021-06-17 3:06:54 AM  
 Don't answer this, but who objects to Juneteenth? What sort of asshole must you be to be bothered by it? It's a major turn in American history and deserves to be officially recognized.

I try to give most jerks a  chance to explain themselves, but sometimes I can't. If Juneteenth worries you, just f*ck right off.
 
2021-06-17 3:11:33 AM  

TomDooley: Better yet we should just have Juneteenth through the Fourth off.


Like Chinese new year. Everything shuts down for like 10 farking days and there is nothing you can do about. Even if there was a billion dollars on the line you ain't getting whatever you ordered from alibaba until after the holiday.
 
2021-06-17 3:12:06 AM  

mrparks: His writer glommed upon "black Independence Day" and went full farking idiot.


encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.comView Full Size
 
2021-06-17 3:14:13 AM  

TeddyRooseveltsMustache: I'd like to celebrate a holiday where Tucker Carlson is shoved down an upward traveling escalator, and falls in perpetuity.

We can call it "Imbecile Tumbling Day".


Like this?
Guy falls down escalator in wheelchair
Youtube Tu2plXY1MlM
 
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