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Duplicate of another approved link: 11501170


(NYPost)   Never negotiate with gnomenappers. Ever   (nypost.com) divider line
    More: Obvious, Kidnapping, Ransom, kidnapping of a cafe, beloved garden gnome, Butternut Squash Caf, bizarre ransom note, Meantime, Cheesecake  
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2021-06-14 1:19:56 PM  
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2021-06-14 1:38:00 PM  
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If you let my gnome go now, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you. I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will shame you.
 
2021-06-14 2:09:54 PM  
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2021-06-14 2:10:25 PM  
I'm afraid that it's going to be "slitzweitz" for that gnome.
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2021-06-14 2:11:52 PM  

Miss_Dorothy_Kilgallen: I'm afraid that it's going to be "slitzweitz" for that gnome.
[Fark user image 425x239]


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2021-06-14 2:17:50 PM  
Fark repeats the shiattiest things.
 
2021-06-14 2:18:49 PM  
In high school my buddies did something like this. Stole someone's gnome and sent a letter to them telling them that gnome was going on vacation and would be back.

Then they brought the gnome with them whenever they traveled anywhere and took pictures to send to the family. So the family got pictures in the mail of their gnome camping, at the beach, at a Grateful Dead concert, at the Lincoln Memorial, etc.

Later that year the gnome was returned, unharmed, along with a stack of souvenirs.
 
2021-06-14 2:20:25 PM  
This is troubling being so close to Rock City in Chattanooga. Let's hope the don't come to the South. Lot's of folks have gnomes in there yards.
 
2021-06-14 2:21:14 PM  
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2021-06-14 2:22:52 PM  

Jojo_TheDogFacedBoy: In high school my buddies did something like this. Stole someone's gnome and sent a letter to them telling them that gnome was going on vacation and would be back.

Then they brought the gnome with them whenever they traveled anywhere and took pictures to send to the family. So the family got pictures in the mail of their gnome camping, at the beach, at a Grateful Dead concert, at the Lincoln Memorial, etc.

Later that year the gnome was returned, unharmed, along with a stack of souvenirs.


Big Amelie fans, I take it?
 
2021-06-14 2:23:12 PM  

Russ1642: Fark repeats the shiattiest things.


Fark is a blind, idiot god encircled by a flopping horde of mindless and amorphous dancers, and lulled by the thin monotonous piping of a demoniac flute held in nameless paws.
 
2021-06-14 2:23:20 PM  
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2021-06-14 2:23:41 PM  
Ingenious crime. Call Inspector Clouseau.
 
2021-06-14 2:23:45 PM  
This reminds me of a famous "kidnapping" in Toronto.  There was a well-known electronic parts store downtown called Active Surplus (great place, bought lots of project parts there), and it was dead easy to point people looking for directions to it by saying, "Just look for the gorilla outside."  A big fuzzy gorilla statue named "Prof. Banana" sat outside the store for many years -- until someone decided to kidnap it.  It made the local news.  I guess the people who stole it felt bad enough (or afraid enough of getting caught once they realized it made the news) that they returned it a short time later.

/It now lives at "The Gorilla Store."
 
2021-06-14 2:23:57 PM  
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2021-06-14 2:24:12 PM  

BafflerMeal: Russ1642: Fark repeats the shiattiest things.

Fark is a blind, idiot god encircled by a flopping horde of mindless and amorphous dancers, and lulled by the thin monotonous piping of a demoniac flute held in nameless paws.


Just the way we like it.
 
2021-06-14 2:35:10 PM  

Jojo_TheDogFacedBoy: In high school my buddies did something like this. Stole someone's gnome and sent a letter to them telling them that gnome was going on vacation and would be back.

Then they brought the gnome with them whenever they traveled anywhere and took pictures to send to the family. So the family got pictures in the mail of their gnome camping, at the beach, at a Grateful Dead concert, at the Lincoln Memorial, etc.

Later that year the gnome was returned, unharmed, along with a stack of souvenirs.


We started with good intentions as you mentioned, was saving the pics for one packet when we returned it with an itinerary of where Geoff (that's what we named him) had traveled for 2 weeks.

Alas, a young woman newly graduated from a high school in St. Louis became a bit gesticular on our balcony one evening and swatted Geoff off the railing.

He did not survive the 6 story fall.

It was like a record scratched as everyone gasped when he went over the edge. The gal who knocked him off watched him fall and yelled "GEOFF, YOU'ER A GNOME NOT A FAIRY!!"

She then looked at us and said "don't do drugs....especially LSD" and walk out of the room never to be seen again.

We outlined the shards with masking tape, took pics, had them developed and left his remains and a bottle of super glue at the house we took him from.

/end CSB time
 
2021-06-14 2:38:54 PM  

brap: [Fark user image 500x902]


Plenty more gnome-related puns in this little ditty

David Bowie - The Laughing Gnome
Youtube 1Oet1pKb0Vo
 
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