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(Twitter)   "Welcome back to CNN, Jeffrey... let's recap for the viewers why you haven't been here lately"   (twitter.com) divider line
    More: Awkward, shot  
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4314 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Jun 2021 at 9:12 AM (9 days ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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2021-06-11 8:12:45 AM  
Original Tweet:

 
2021-06-11 8:13:05 AM  
Fark needs a "Cringe" tag
 
2021-06-11 8:29:38 AM  
He most certainly passes "not a robot".
 
2021-06-11 8:38:07 AM  
I need a shower now
 
2021-06-11 8:49:27 AM  
WTF is the problem??  This was not a purposeful indecent exposure. This was a person essentially caught in the Zoom era's equivalent of going to the bathroom and taking a dump with a hot mic. Masturbating on one's own time is completely normal. Being technologically challenged is completely normal. These two happen to have coincided. Our puritanical society is at fault here...not him.
 
2021-06-11 9:02:18 AM  
In a just world a woman would have been hired in his place and he would be stocking shelves at Walmart. Notice how most women can keep their hands out of their pants long enough to get through the work day.
 
2021-06-11 9:11:13 AM  

Miss5280: In a just world a woman would have been hired in his place and he would be stocking shelves at Walmart. Notice how most women can keep their hands out of their pants long enough to get through the work day.


Yeah, I have never understood this. Why the hell can't these guys get through the damn work day without jacking off?  That seems like a serious problem to me, one that has some deep underlying issues.
 
2021-06-11 9:12:27 AM  

meehaw: WTF is the problem??  This was not a purposeful indecent exposure. This was a person essentially caught in the Zoom era's equivalent of going to the bathroom and taking a dump with a hot mic. Masturbating on one's own time is completely normal. Being technologically challenged is completely normal. These two happen to have coincided. Our puritanical society is at fault here...not him.


No, this was the equivalent of rubbing one out in the conference room during the 5-minute comfort break when everyone else was in the bathroom or getting coffee.
 
2021-06-11 9:24:16 AM  
I expect great things from him in the future.
 
2021-06-11 9:25:42 AM  
Well that was... uncomfortable.
 
2021-06-11 9:25:51 AM  

meehaw: Zoom era's equivalent of going to the bathroom and taking a dump with a hot mic


Sounds like you don't know if someone's...[puts on sunglasses]...coming or going.

YEEEEEEAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!!!!​!!!
 
2021-06-11 9:27:26 AM  

Benevolent Misanthrope: Miss5280: In a just world a woman would have been hired in his place and he would be stocking shelves at Walmart. Notice how most women can keep their hands out of their pants long enough to get through the work day.

Yeah, I have never understood this. Why the hell can't these guys get through the damn work day without jacking off?  That seems like a serious problem to me, one that has some deep underlying issues.


Well, there's the rub.
 
2021-06-11 9:28:11 AM  

meehaw: WTF is the problem??  This was not a purposeful indecent exposure. This was a person essentially caught in the Zoom era's equivalent of going to the bathroom and taking a dump with a hot mic. Masturbating on one's own time is completely normal. Being technologically challenged is completely normal. These two happen to have coincided. Our puritanical society is at fault here...not him.


You have completely misread the situation and clearly are lacking any ethical or moral principles.
 
2021-06-11 9:31:17 AM  
he's got balls, as everyone on that Zoom call can attest.
 
2021-06-11 9:33:06 AM  

meehaw: WTF is the problem??  This was not a purposeful indecent exposure. This was a person essentially caught in the Zoom era's equivalent of going to the bathroom and taking a dump with a hot mic. Masturbating on one's own time is completely normal. Being technologically challenged is completely normal. These two happen to have coincided. Our puritanical society is at fault here...not him.


Let me just ask you. Would you be asking what the problem was if this was Tucker Carlson or Sean Hannity? or would you be first in line at the outrage party?
 
2021-06-11 9:33:25 AM  
Make a comment about Native Americans....that's a firing. Jerking off in front of your fellow employees....welcome back to CNN.
 
2021-06-11 9:33:34 AM  

meehaw: WTF is the problem??  This was not a purposeful indecent exposure. This was a person essentially caught in the Zoom era's equivalent of going to the bathroom and taking a dump with a hot mic. Masturbating on one's own time is completely normal. Being technologically challenged is completely normal. These two happen to have coincided. Our puritanical society is at fault here...not him.


Wow, swing and a miss.


What do you expect tho from a derrshowitz product?
 
2021-06-11 9:34:35 AM  
This segment is brought to you by Lubriderm
 
2021-06-11 9:34:42 AM  

OldRod: Fark needs a "Cringe" tag


vudukungfu: I need a shower now


Ya, I'll pass.  I watch CNN all the time so I will see him eventually but I'll skip this one.  I feel bad for the guy.
 
2021-06-11 9:35:07 AM  
Oof. Poor guy.

Honestly, getting caught spankin' it is a huge fear for a lot of guys. I'm surprised this guy didn't 86 himself.
 
2021-06-11 9:36:13 AM  
I feel bad for people who don't understand this man's plight.

Sometimes you gotta go jerk off, no matter where you are. That or just start fighting people.
 
2021-06-11 9:36:35 AM  

BeotchPudding: Make a comment about Native Americans....that's a firing. Jerking off in front of your fellow employees....welcome back to CNN.


So his life should be over because he accidentally rubbed one out on camera? Regardless of the guys history he deserves a second chance
 
2021-06-11 9:37:20 AM  
Half of you are masturbating right now.
 
2021-06-11 9:38:20 AM  
What a jerk.
 
2021-06-11 9:39:18 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-06-11 9:39:41 AM  
In addition : alisyn is a dolt, and if she hadn't been harassed by ailes (the only bad thing about working for fox , apparently)  she'd still be gladly spewing faux propaganda for that shiny paycheck.    You can bet she begged to be the one to do this segment.
 
2021-06-11 9:40:03 AM  

8 inches: What a jerk.


Username checks out
 
2021-06-11 9:40:03 AM  

Benevolent Misanthrope: Miss5280: In a just world a woman would have been hired in his place and he would be stocking shelves at Walmart. Notice how most women can keep their hands out of their pants long enough to get through the work day.

Yeah, I have never understood this. Why the hell can't these guys get through the damn work day without jacking off?  That seems like a serious problem to me, one that has some deep underlying issues.


Seems a little extreme. It's not like he did it on purpose and he was punished. Agree with both of you on the other point though. It's like the stories we see about guys getting busted in a walmart parking lot or somewhere. Can't you even run a few errands without having to stop and fap? Just wait until you get home.
 
2021-06-11 9:41:06 AM  

OldRod: Fark needs a "Cringe" tag


Isn't that what the Florida tag is for?
 
2021-06-11 9:41:15 AM  
You jerk it one time and get caught...
 
2021-06-11 9:44:39 AM  

DaShredda: I feel bad for people who don't understand this man's plight.

Sometimes you gotta go jerk off, no matter where you are. That or just start fighting people.


I don't understand this at all. Maybe that's another thing I can chalk up to not having grown up with brothers.

/ if it's during the workday, fight someone.
// if there's a camera around, fight someone instead.
/// how did we make it to the Moon with men jerking off all the time???
 
2021-06-11 9:44:47 AM  

LaChanz: Half of you are masturbating right now.



True. Nobody's hands are clean.
 
2021-06-11 9:47:15 AM  

Benevolent Misanthrope: Miss5280: In a just world a woman would have been hired in his place and he would be stocking shelves at Walmart. Notice how most women can keep their hands out of their pants long enough to get through the work day.

Yeah, I have never understood this. Why the hell can't these guys get through the damn work day without jacking off?  That seems like a serious problem to me, one that has some deep underlying issues.


Well, you have a few options:
•  Mental illness
•  Excitement of not getting caught
•  Poor impulse control
•  Unnaturally strong urge to mate

Or a combination of all of the above.
 
2021-06-11 9:47:47 AM  
There's no way I'm clicking on that Photoshop link.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-06-11 9:48:22 AM  
Stephen Lynch | "Talk to Me Dad" | w/ Lyrics
Youtube UWIeOjHVpK4
 
2021-06-11 9:48:32 AM  

pschwarz0717: meehaw: WTF is the problem??  This was not a purposeful indecent exposure. This was a person essentially caught in the Zoom era's equivalent of going to the bathroom and taking a dump with a hot mic. Masturbating on one's own time is completely normal. Being technologically challenged is completely normal. These two happen to have coincided. Our puritanical society is at fault here...not him.

Let me just ask you. Would you be asking what the problem was if this was Tucker Carlson or Sean Hannity? or would you be first in line at the outrage party?


Unless there is sexual harassment or coercion or some other manipulation involved, what other people do in their personal sex lives is not my business. While I did misspeak when saying "...not him"...he's obviously at fault and responsible for his actions. I'm sure his personal embarrassment and shame after discovering that he was still on the Zoom call were enough. Just point it out to him, then move on. The revelation alone would mortify me and be sufficient. But this obsession in the US with making believe that we aren't sexual beings that sometimes have urges and act on them in stupid ways should simply not be a cause for termination from a job.
 
2021-06-11 9:49:27 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-06-11 9:50:54 AM  

American-Irish eyes: meehaw: WTF is the problem??  This was not a purposeful indecent exposure. This was a person essentially caught in the Zoom era's equivalent of going to the bathroom and taking a dump with a hot mic. Masturbating on one's own time is completely normal. Being technologically challenged is completely normal. These two happen to have coincided. Our puritanical society is at fault here...not him.

You have completely misread the situation and clearly are lacking any ethical or moral principles.


Completely, huh? Sex and masturbation are the ONLY places where morality and ethics should apply? I suppose you are one of those people who think a movie with boobies deserves an R rating, while killing indiscriminately is perfectly OK for children to see. I think exactly the opposite. Again, we are puritanical to a fault in the US.
 
2021-06-11 9:51:36 AM  

meehaw: pschwarz0717: meehaw: WTF is the problem??  This was not a purposeful indecent exposure. This was a person essentially caught in the Zoom era's equivalent of going to the bathroom and taking a dump with a hot mic. Masturbating on one's own time is completely normal. Being technologically challenged is completely normal. These two happen to have coincided. Our puritanical society is at fault here...not him.

Let me just ask you. Would you be asking what the problem was if this was Tucker Carlson or Sean Hannity? or would you be first in line at the outrage party?

Unless there is sexual harassment or coercion or some other manipulation involved, what other people do in their personal sex lives is not my business. While I did misspeak when saying "...not him"...he's obviously at fault and responsible for his actions. I'm sure his personal embarrassment and shame after discovering that he was still on the Zoom call were enough. Just point it out to him, then move on. The revelation alone would mortify me and be sufficient. But this obsession in the US with making believe that we aren't sexual beings that sometimes have urges and act on them in stupid ways should simply not be a cause for termination from a job.


Doing something stupidly unprofessional is a reason to be terminated from your job. He did something stupidly unprofessional and shouldn't be back on camera. Put in the newsroom writing scripts, but keep him away from cameras. He doesn't have good judgment or impulse control.
 
2021-06-11 9:51:40 AM  

Benevolent Misanthrope: meehaw: WTF is the problem??  This was not a purposeful indecent exposure. This was a person essentially caught in the Zoom era's equivalent of going to the bathroom and taking a dump with a hot mic. Masturbating on one's own time is completely normal. Being technologically challenged is completely normal. These two happen to have coincided. Our puritanical society is at fault here...not him.

No, this was the equivalent of rubbing one out in the conference room during the 5-minute comfort break when everyone else was in the bathroom or getting coffee.


Oh, cmon, who here hasn't gone to the office bathroom to rub one out?
 
2021-06-11 9:51:46 AM  

deanis: Oof. Poor guy.

Honestly, getting caught spankin' it is a huge fear for a lot of guys. I'm surprised this guy didn't 86 himself.


What's more embarrassing, getting caught by your mom or you catching your mom?
 
2021-06-11 9:52:51 AM  

8 inches: What a jerk.


Don't pull that here.
 
2021-06-11 9:53:26 AM  

meehaw: pschwarz0717: meehaw: WTF is the problem??  This was not a purposeful indecent exposure. This was a person essentially caught in the Zoom era's equivalent of going to the bathroom and taking a dump with a hot mic. Masturbating on one's own time is completely normal. Being technologically challenged is completely normal. These two happen to have coincided. Our puritanical society is at fault here...not him.

Let me just ask you. Would you be asking what the problem was if this was Tucker Carlson or Sean Hannity? or would you be first in line at the outrage party?

Unless there is sexual harassment or coercion or some other manipulation involved, what other people do in their personal sex lives is not my business. While I did misspeak when saying "...not him"...he's obviously at fault and responsible for his actions. I'm sure his personal embarrassment and shame after discovering that he was still on the Zoom call were enough. Just point it out to him, then move on. The revelation alone would mortify me and be sufficient. But this obsession in the US with making believe that we aren't sexual beings that sometimes have urges and act on them in stupid ways should simply not be a cause for termination from a job.


If you're trying to say the crew that frequents this page would have accepted the creepy apology Toobin gave yesterday and have it be sufficient penance from any Fox news commentator  gave in the same situation, i would say i want about 12 pounds of whatever you're smoking.
 
2021-06-11 9:54:31 AM  

LaChanz: Half of you are masturbating right now.


That's only because that's when "My Little Pony" plays on Nickelodeon.
 
2021-06-11 9:56:49 AM  

meehaw: pschwarz0717: meehaw: WTF is the problem??  This was not a purposeful indecent exposure. This was a person essentially caught in the Zoom era's equivalent of going to the bathroom and taking a dump with a hot mic. Masturbating on one's own time is completely normal. Being technologically challenged is completely normal. These two happen to have coincided. Our puritanical society is at fault here...not him.

Let me just ask you. Would you be asking what the problem was if this was Tucker Carlson or Sean Hannity? or would you be first in line at the outrage party?

Unless there is sexual harassment or coercion or some other manipulation involved, what other people do in their personal sex lives is not my business. While I did misspeak when saying "...not him"...he's obviously at fault and responsible for his actions. I'm sure his personal embarrassment and shame after discovering that he was still on the Zoom call were enough. Just point it out to him, then move on. The revelation alone would mortify me and be sufficient. But this obsession in the US with making believe that we aren't sexual beings that sometimes have urges and act on them in stupid ways should simply not be a cause for termination from a job.


There are a lot more potential legal ramifications that can be in play, if you generalize this to all people potentially on the call, not just Toobin.
 
2021-06-11 9:57:51 AM  
When they cut to him he can say "go way, batin!"
 
2021-06-11 9:58:05 AM  

LaChanz: Half of you are masturbating right now.


In my defense, half-heartedly.
 
2021-06-11 9:58:22 AM  

urethra_franklin: [YouTube video: Stephen Lynch | "Talk to Me Dad" | w/ Lyrics]


The Cob Quicky, for quickly putting butter on corn on the cob.
Possibly NSFW, for really puritanical work places, or bosses with no sense of humor on a Friday. (Seriously, if it's NSFW for you, you need a new place to work.)
 
2021-06-11 10:03:23 AM  

meehaw: WTF is the problem??  This was not a purposeful indecent exposure. This was a person essentially caught in the Zoom era's equivalent of going to the bathroom and taking a dump with a hot mic. Masturbating on one's own time is completely normal. Being technologically challenged is completely normal. These two happen to have coincided. Our puritanical society is at fault here...not him.


I've been saying this all along: masturbating to porn is not illegal. So why do the cops keep pulling me over?
 
2021-06-11 10:03:28 AM  

Leader O'Cola: In addition : alisyn is a dolt, and if she hadn't been harassed by ailes (the only bad thing about working for fox , apparently)  she'd still be gladly spewing faux propaganda for that shiny paycheck.    You can bet she begged to be the one to do this segment.


I disagree with this strongly.  She worked at Fox, yes.  That's about as close as anyone who has watched her anchor a desk over the past 10-20 years will agree with you.
 
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