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(The Sun)   Blessed are the big noses, indeed (possible nsfw content on page)   ( divider line
    More: Amusing, The Sun, Barry Manilow, Newspaper, The Times, News of the World, News Corporation, News International, Human penis size  
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2924 clicks; posted to Main » on 04 May 2021 at 12:17 PM (13 days ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook

48 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
2021-05-04 9:32:45 AM  
Good thing I have a pug nose, otherwise I wouldn't be able to button my jeans ...
2021-05-04 10:08:10 AM  
I can smell you from here.
2021-05-04 12:18:42 PM  
Stop thinking about sex all the time

- Brians mom
2021-05-04 12:19:03 PM  
Damn! Now the secret is out. All the ladies will finally figure out why I wear two masks
2021-05-04 12:19:32 PM  
The Sun is back with hard hitting journalism.
2021-05-04 12:20:29 PM  
Wait until Biggus Dickus hears about this!
2021-05-04 12:20:55 PM  
They called me "The Beak" in grade school, just sayin'.
2021-05-04 12:21:06 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size

RIP Shock G
2021-05-04 12:21:28 PM  
I have a small nose but huge nostrils. What does that indicate? Wait. Don't answer that.
2021-05-04 12:21:37 PM  
Clicked ready for some (hopefully mild?) antisemitism, leaving nodding.

// my god, the extra tonnage Abe Vigoda must be dragging around...
2021-05-04 12:23:06 PM  
upload.wikimedia.orgView Full Size

Somewhere Milton Berle is laughing.


2021-05-04 12:24:43 PM  
No wonder Cyrano got all the girls.
2021-05-04 12:27:02 PM  
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2021-05-04 12:27:21 PM  

Ladies. <eyebrow waggle>
2021-05-04 12:28:35 PM  
Well, I'm all set for the pretty ladies to storm in.
2021-05-04 12:28:41 PM  

fragMasterFlash: [Fark user image image 200x230]

RIP Shock G

Digital Underground - The Humpty Dance (Official Music Video)
Youtube PBsjggc5jHM
2021-05-04 12:28:41 PM  
Ha ha ha, they did a penis size study in Japan.
2021-05-04 12:29:32 PM  
It's time I come clean with you all.  This is my real photo:

dinoanimals.comView Full Size
2021-05-04 12:32:45 PM  
No wonder this guy has a smile:
static.wikia.nocookie.netView Full Size
2021-05-04 12:33:23 PM  
So if you play a gnome, you're compensating?

vignette2.wikia.nocookie.netView Full Size
2021-05-04 12:35:50 PM  
Well indony belive it. I have a very small nose, but my punishment is 17.547 km long, though most of it is curled through the 6th, 8th, and 13th dimensions. Still, ladies be all like "ahhhh my extradimentional g spot". It's a thing, look it up you savages.
2021-05-04 12:36:33 PM  
*looks down undies* Yup, typical Sun sharticle.  :*/
2021-05-04 12:38:16 PM  
I know it's the Sun, but is it really that hard for them to link to the actual study (fark won't let this hyperlink work though):​/articles/10.1186/s12610-021-00121-z

From the research article:  "Therefore, we also investigated whether the size of the male genitalia similarly exposed to serum testosterone during aging could change with age in our previous report. We found that penile length almost stopped increasing during adolescence, remained unchanged in middle age, and decreased slightly in older males [9]. The saying "Big nose, big hose" suggests that nose size indicates penile length. However, scientific reports that prove this statement are not available to date."Yes, that apparently was the hypothesis behind this masterpiece.

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2021-05-04 12:40:18 PM  
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2021-05-04 12:41:54 PM  

fragMasterFlash: [Fark user image 200x230]

RIP Shock G

Big like a pickle, he's still gettin' paid.

i.gifer.comView Full Size
2021-05-04 12:42:58 PM  

Advernaut: Ha ha ha, they did a penis size study in Japan.

y.yarn.coView Full Size
2021-05-04 12:43:28 PM  
Is that Rod Stewart?
2021-05-04 12:44:59 PM  
Those with a nose length of around 1.7in had an average non-erect penis size of 4in. But fellas ... with a hooter of at least 2.1in boasted 5.3in.

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2021-05-04 12:48:57 PM  
But what of the cheese makers?
2021-05-04 12:53:51 PM  
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The size of your bird is directly proportional to the size of your nose.
2021-05-04 12:54:53 PM  

maxheck: Well, I'm all set for the pretty ladies to storm in.

Used to have a running argument with a girl about who had the bigger nose. (I did, by quite a bit. Rose has a tiny and kissable nose.) Genital size didn't factor into it tho.
2021-05-04 1:03:55 PM  
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2021-05-04 1:05:53 PM  
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2021-05-04 1:08:41 PM  
Reminds me of an old joke:
A man sits down in his seat on an airplane flight to Las Vegas.
The most beautiful woman he's ever seen sits down in the seat next to him.
They strike up a conversation, and the man asks, "So what are you going to Las Vegas for?"
"To the annual American Association of Nymphomaniacs conference."
"Really? Are you a member?"
"Oh, I'm not just a member, I'm actually presenting a scientific paper."
"Wow" says the man. "What's the topic?"
The lady replies, "I do research of variations in sexuality among different ethnic groups."
"You don't say!"
"Yes! For example, we have found that Jews make the best lovers, Native Americans have the largest penises, and Southern Rednecks have the greatest sexual stamina.  But here I am, rambling on, and we haven't even introduced ourselves yet! My name is Tina Smith," she said, extending her hand.
"Pleased to meet you, Ms. Smith," said the gentleman. "My name is Running Bear Goldberg, but my friends call me Bubba."
2021-05-04 1:10:58 PM  
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2021-05-04 1:21:02 PM  
Hey guys. What's going on in this thread?

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2021-05-04 1:46:23 PM  
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More big noses from reputably big men.
2021-05-04 1:46:33 PM  
First it was the size of the feet. Then the hands. Then the index finger and now the nose. I think, for a time, the ears were worked in there also.

I still recall the story of a guy who saw his infant son on a sonogram and went whooping around about the size of his penis but when the baby was born, he had a girl. He had seen a rare loop of the umbilical cord.
2021-05-04 1:50:52 PM  
So i wonder how this data reconciles with how the nose never stops growing your entire life and is part of why a nose of X size with a bit extra bulbyness around the tip, is a clear sign of age we all recognize by the time we're early grade school. We just spot the pattern there to be seen, no really has to teach it to us.

just say'n while the sack droops ever more, i ain't notice any extra hang in the dong to go with it really.

So not sure the data in the study is all exactly, WYSWYG kinda coloration as pitched, but would be a measure taken that will hold true at some specific point on a life time line, but not just arbitrarily any time ever in a life.
2021-05-04 2:52:26 PM  

AintNoAmoeba: [Fark user image 500x363] [View Full Size image _x_]
The size of your bird is directly proportional to the size of your nose.

I'd hate to see the grindstone.
2021-05-04 3:51:49 PM  
Why measure non erect length? There are show-ers and growers.
2021-05-04 3:54:47 PM  
thumbs.gfycat.comView Full Size
2021-05-04 5:59:57 PM  
What would J.P. Morgan's nose say about his willy?

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2021-05-04 6:04:50 PM  
This is article and their research is B.S. by the way.  Black men, have wide noses but not at all long, so article is disproved.
2021-05-04 7:05:48 PM  
"No time for the ol' in-out, love. Just come to read the meter."

statusmagonline.comView Full Size
2021-05-04 10:55:35 PM  
I always wished I had a bigger nose.
2021-05-04 11:49:35 PM  
Massive honker, tiny tonker.  I must be an outlier.
2021-05-05 4:00:29 PM  
I used to tell shipmates that I had more on my face than they did anywhere on their body. As a gay man, big noses were always a kind of attraction, but I never knew why, really. I always assumed little nosed pretty boys were too much trouble and a lot of up keep, so why bother bother, eh? But, to be honest, I've never been a size-queen either. You get what you get. I've gotten compliments on my package but it's kind of embarrassing. I mean, besides Thank You, what do you say? "Thanks, I grew it myself?" My best was, "Thanks. It's never been that big before. It must really like you!" I do have a larger nose but that runs in the family, I think from the German/Bohemian side of the family, but the Scots-Irish side had pretty good honkers, too, judging from old photos. You get what you get. Never had the least interest in nose-reduction plastic surgery. Why? That just means you hate yourself, and what good does that do? You waste time obsessing over your looks when you could be doing something useful to better your earnings, and money will get you a better class of mate than poverty. And since plastic surgery costs money, that makes you poorer. You better hope you're investing in trading off your temporary looks for cash (which makes you a ho', whatever gender) and putting that money to good use, because even with the surgery, beauty fades, but portfolios persist.
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