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(StudyFinds)   A new study found the exact number of cups of coffee you should drink in a day is ... five, ahh ahh ahh, five cups   (studyfinds.org) divider line
    More: Obvious, Coffee, morning coffee, new study finds, Drink, drink coffee, new study, coffee drinkers, Previous studies  
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2224 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 Apr 2021 at 10:35 AM (3 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



103 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


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2021-04-21 8:31:30 AM  
Do energy drinks count? Um... asking for a friend.
 
2021-04-21 10:08:30 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size


iveonlyhadthreesofarineedtwomoreohholy​shiatthecolorsgoingtoruntoworktoday...
 
2021-04-21 10:26:03 AM  
5?

underachievers
 
2021-04-21 10:37:30 AM  
Cups? It's supposed to be Pots you ass clowns
 
2021-04-21 10:37:31 AM  
....study paid for by the coffee industry, and by coffee fanatics anxious to justify their addiction.
 
2021-04-21 10:38:30 AM  
Sounds good to me. Plus, I convert to iced coffee when I get to work, so I get some water in as well.

Also, +1,Subby.
 
2021-04-21 10:38:33 AM  
encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.comView Full Size
 
2021-04-21 10:38:44 AM  
Right on target.
 
2021-04-21 10:40:14 AM  
Flawed study. It only studied the short-term effects of drinking coffee, immediately after drinking it.

But drinking coffee is only making you more tired. After the initial boost wears off, you become lethargic unless you keep drinking more caffeine.

Meanwhile, people who don't drink coffee remain at a more stable and consistent level of alertness, without having sleep problems at night.
 
2021-04-21 10:40:27 AM  

BenSaw2: Sounds good to me. Plus, I convert to iced coffee when I get to work, so I get some water in as well.


I'm about to move into "cold press" season. Stick that stuff in the fridge overnight. All good in the morning.

Too hot here in the summer for fresh brew.
 
2021-04-21 10:41:20 AM  
Five pots of coffee.  Got it.

Thanks, blogger.
 
2021-04-21 10:43:05 AM  

Corn_Fed: Flawed study. It only studied the short-term effects of drinking coffee, immediately after drinking it.

But drinking coffee is only making you more tired. After the initial boost wears off, you become lethargic unless you keep drinking more caffeine.

Meanwhile, people who don't drink coffee remain at a more stable and consistent level of alertness, without having sleep problems at night.


Five Man Electrical Band - Signs (Exclusive Video)
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2021-04-21 10:44:10 AM  

namegoeshere: [Fark user image image 225x225]

iveonlyhadthreesofarineedtwomoreohholy​shiatthecolorsgoingtoruntoworktoday...​


Why did you steal my tea cup, you bastard :(
 
2021-04-21 10:44:11 AM  
thanks, but I don't need a diarrhea based weight loss plan.
 
2021-04-21 10:45:07 AM  
Malarkey.
Hey balance study would to the exact milligrams.
🙄
 
2021-04-21 10:46:39 AM  
Shameful CSB: I don't even brew or buy coffee anymore but pour roughly a half teaspoon full of instant Nescafe into my hand and swish it down with whatever on hand a few times a day. I'd estimate the caffeine equivalency to be 3 cups. It's very economical and efficient but don't let anyone see you do it
/Hobo Life
 
2021-04-21 10:46:40 AM  
Did they monitor the previous night's whiskey consumption? FLAWED STUDY.
 
2021-04-21 10:50:10 AM  
Jim never has a fifth cup of coffee at home.....
 
2021-04-21 10:50:37 AM  
When I was unemployed in the early 2000s, one day I decided to see how many pots of coffee I could drink in a day. It was shorty after that I threw the Mr Coffee in the trash. It was years until I deemed coffee safe again. Then three years ago, I was advised to stop caffeine all together or my heart would assplode.
 
2021-04-21 10:51:04 AM  

berylman: Shameful CSB: I don't even brew or buy coffee anymore but pour roughly a half teaspoon full of instant Nescafe into my hand and swish it down with whatever on hand a few times a day. I'd estimate the caffeine equivalency to be 3 cups. It's very economical and efficient but don't let anyone see you do it
/Hobo Life


You need an intervention.
 
2021-04-21 10:51:09 AM  

jim32rr: Cups? It's supposed to be Pots you ass clowns


That's not entirely legal yet.
 
2021-04-21 10:51:20 AM  

Albert911emt: ....study paid for by the coffee industry, and by coffee fanatics anxious to justify their addiction.


Well in that case you might want to take those "studies" that say that alcohol is good for you with a grain of salt.
 
2021-04-21 10:53:34 AM  
How about zero cups? That works for me. Coffee is disgusting.
 
2021-04-21 10:53:56 AM  

iamskibibitz: Albert911emt: ....study paid for by the coffee industry, and by coffee fanatics anxious to justify their addiction.

Well in that case you might want to take those "studies" that say that alcohol is good for you with a grain of salt.


You shut your whore mouth.
 
2021-04-21 10:54:01 AM  

berylman: Shameful CSB: I don't even brew or buy coffee anymore but pour roughly a half teaspoon full of instant Nescafe into my hand and swish it down with whatever on hand a few times a day. I'd estimate the caffeine equivalency to be 3 cups. It's very economical and efficient but don't let anyone see you do it
/Hobo Life


It is a not uncommon pre-gym workout drink for heavy lifters to mix a spoon of freeze-dried coffee into a coke and chug it down.
 
2021-04-21 10:54:31 AM  

Winterlight: Do energy drinks count? Um... asking for a friend.


Your friend needs to have a heathy heart in order to handle 4 cups a day for two years...
Source
 
2021-04-21 10:54:38 AM  
I guess if you're going for the British-teeth look
 
2021-04-21 10:54:54 AM  
i.gifer.comView Full Size
 
2021-04-21 10:55:19 AM  
Is this from the same scientists that said we should eat ten tablespoons of coco a day because it made rats thin?
 
2021-04-21 10:56:40 AM  

kyuzokai: How about zero cups? That works for me. Coffee is disgusting.


Folgers is not coffee, there's your problem
 
2021-04-21 10:56:49 AM  
"People who drink 3-5 cups of coffee a day are more alert, have better memory"

... and spend a lot more time in the bathroom.

Just sayin'
 
2021-04-21 10:58:51 AM  
Number of males succumbing to encephalopathies of unknown etiologies is increasing.  No need for beatdowns on the scrimmage line to result in CTE.  Could be ag chemicals, could be sunspots - but confusion, agitation and tied to the hospital bed rails with hands swaddled in cotton bandages secured by velcro - unable to recognize or name wife of thirty years?

Well, docs of every specialty will suggest and execute every sort of lab test - good insurance will get one's brain tissue collected (NOPE) and reduced to a slide-set (after everything from heavy metals to Hanta V./toxoplasmosis have been eliminated from consideration).

Then, some friendly nurse's aid brings the patient coffee at 02:00 (patient way off any reasonable schedule owing to hourly collection of bodily fluids and injections of vitamins).  Patient guzzled first cup through straw - and felt so  "light" that he asked for another, and another.

4 cups of "bottom of the percolator" brew and ZOOM.  Yes, memories returned with a bullet - still missing that first ten days on ventilator - but when the psychiatrist showed up to evaluate for transfer of patient to long-term palliative care?  Yeah, patient not only recognized shrink as being fellow employee of defunct hosp. - twenty years previous - but could name names and all particulars - shrink rec. unwrapping 'restraints' and sending patient home.

Docs still have no idea what happened (diagnostic digging revealed nothing out of ordinary).  However, low level, cheap, clinical, interventions (caffeine) might be a less expensive means of resetting the matrix.

/YMMV
 
2021-04-21 10:59:30 AM  
Great news! If 3-5 cups per day are good for me, by extension the 10 cups I drink per day are really great for me. I can science!
 
2021-04-21 11:02:15 AM  

waxbeans: Malarkey.
Hey balance study would to the exact milligrams.
🙄


Jesus Christ's voice to Text really hates me my original comment should convey:  "a study containing actual science would have actual milligrams"
&  state a precise amount or something to affect is what I meant to say
 
2021-04-21 11:03:24 AM  
azquotes.comView Full Size
 
2021-04-21 11:04:09 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-04-21 11:05:23 AM  
God, I think that would rip my insides out.
 
2021-04-21 11:05:51 AM  

Solty Dog: When I was unemployed in the early 2000s, one day I decided to see how many pots of coffee I could drink in a day. It was shorty after that I threw the Mr Coffee in the trash. It was years until I deemed coffee safe again. Then three years ago, I was advised to stop caffeine all together or my heart would assplode.


Ya...That stuff will keep your innards moving for a while if you drink enough of it...
 
2021-04-21 11:09:16 AM  

guestguy: [i.gifer.com image 500x375] [View Full Size image _x_]


ah, the good ole days when your cartoon characters could chain smoke and be strung out on coffee.
 
2021-04-21 11:11:45 AM  

jim32rr: kyuzokai: How about zero cups? That works for me. Coffee is disgusting.

Folgers is not coffee, there's your problem


Friends always say "You just haven't had good coffee. Try [their favorite]."  I say, "You pay, I'll try, but don't cry if I still hate it."

I've thrown away a lot of expensive coffee that way.  They eventually give up. It's just not for me- I'm a bit of a supertaster, and very sensitive to some particular bitter flavors. Oddly enough, I love bitter chocolate, and I can eat chocolate covered coffee beans... I just can't stand the drink or any of its permutations, even with a mountain of sugar, cream, and whatever else you can throw at it.
 
2021-04-21 11:14:23 AM  

berylman: Shameful CSB: I don't even brew or buy coffee anymore but pour roughly a half teaspoon full of instant Nescafe into my hand and swish it down with whatever on hand a few times a day. I'd estimate the caffeine equivalency to be 3 cups. It's very economical and efficient but don't let anyone see you do it
/Hobo Life


Okay... gross. But also, instant coffee instructions generally recommend 1 to 2 teaspoons per cup, so I don't think you're getting 3 cups worth of caffeine. Time to up your game and choke down at least a tablespoon of that shiat!

At this point why not just take caffeine pills?
 
2021-04-21 11:17:49 AM  
That would kill me. And if it didn't, I wouldn't sleep for 3 days.
No caffeine after noon...that includes soft drinks and iced tea.
 
2021-04-21 11:22:52 AM  

patrick767: berylman: Shameful CSB: I don't even brew or buy coffee anymore but pour roughly a half teaspoon full of instant Nescafe into my hand and swish it down with whatever on hand a few times a day. I'd estimate the caffeine equivalency to be 3 cups. It's very economical and efficient but don't let anyone see you do it
/Hobo Life

Okay... gross. But also, instant coffee instructions generally recommend 1 to 2 teaspoons per cup, so I don't think you're getting 3 cups worth of caffeine. Time to up your game and choke down at least a tablespoon of that shiat!

At this point why not just take caffeine pills?


Fark user imageView Full Size

that a rhetorical question?
 
2021-04-21 11:24:44 AM  

berylman: Shameful CSB: I don't even brew or buy coffee anymore but pour roughly a half teaspoon full of instant Nescafe into my hand and swish it down with whatever on hand a few times a day. I'd estimate the caffeine equivalency to be 3 cups. It's very economical and efficient but don't let anyone see you do it
/Hobo Life


Incarcerated folk snort it. Don't feel too bad.
 
2021-04-21 11:34:10 AM  

Albert911emt: ....study paid for by the coffee industry, and by coffee fanatics anxious to justify their addiction.


And brought to you by Juan Valdez.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-04-21 11:36:30 AM  

iamskibibitz: Albert911emt: ....study paid for by the coffee industry, and by coffee fanatics anxious to justify their addiction.

Well in that case you might want to take those "studies" that say that alcohol is good for you with a grain of salt.


Next week news headline: Coffee, the silent killer in your cupboard!
 
2021-04-21 11:39:40 AM  
5 six-ounce (standard 'cup' of coffe) servings.  That's my travel mug.  Then I have another once I get to work.
 
2021-04-21 11:40:28 AM  
64.media.tumblr.comView Full Size

I don't drink coffee.
 
2021-04-21 11:42:02 AM  
Each body's chemistry is different. If I drank five cups of coffee a day it would cause the shakes for people on the other side of the world through quantum entanglement
 
2021-04-21 11:43:53 AM  
I guess I just don't trust the findings of 55 people (24 non coffee drinkers, 31 drinkers) published in Molecular Psychology. Seems too many outlying factors could easily taint results.
 
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