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(Cracked)   Five crazy ways cold cases were solved   (cracked.com) divider line
    More: Interesting, Brach's, Dominican Republic, DNA, The Little Mermaid, Necco, disappearance of Helen Vorhees Brach, real life, nice little life  
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809 clicks; posted to Discussion » on 14 Apr 2021 at 3:05 PM (3 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



20 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2021-04-14 12:06:55 PM  
John List Taken Down By Sculpture And Optometry

... They just couldn't find him. His car was located at the Kennedy International Airport, so they had a nagging suspicion that he was no longer in New Jersey, but for almost 20 years, it was like he'd vanished without a trace. In 1989, they brought out the big guns: John Walsh...


For some reason, I actually remember that episode of AMW.
 
2021-04-14 3:05:40 PM  
Nearly all my idiot cousins did 23&me a few years back for Xmas, so I'm boned.
 
2021-04-14 3:30:37 PM  
You could say they "cracked" the cases. Right? Am I doing it right? Cracked? Get it?
 
2021-04-14 3:36:52 PM  

foo monkey: Nearly all my idiot cousins did 23&me a few years back for Xmas, so I'm boned.


Submit your own profile to 23&me using a hobo's DNA. If the cops check, it will just look like you're adopted.
 
2021-04-14 3:43:44 PM  
Wasn't there a cold case solved by the pollen from a lone tree found near the body?
 
2021-04-14 3:44:02 PM  

Troy Aikman's Giant Thumbs: foo monkey: Nearly all my idiot cousins did 23&me a few years back for Xmas, so I'm boned.

Submit your own profile to 23&me using a hobo's DNA. If the cops check, it will just look like you're adopted.


upload.wikimedia.orgView Full Size

...or not.
 
2021-04-14 3:44:59 PM  
...when police searched his Portland home, they found compelling evidence that someone had probably definitely died there.

Probably definitely
 
2021-04-14 4:25:33 PM  

allthesametome: ...when police searched his Portland home, they found compelling evidence that someone had probably definitely died there.

Probably definitely


"Allegedly probably definitely".
You can  quote me on that.
 
2021-04-14 4:38:22 PM  
or you could just watch forensic files
 
2021-04-14 4:53:11 PM  

allthesametome: ...when police searched his Portland home, they found compelling evidence that someone had probably definitely died there.

Probably definitely


So dead body stank and bloodstains ?
 
2021-04-14 5:34:41 PM  
12 ounce curls ?
 
2021-04-14 6:05:15 PM  

Troy Aikman's Giant Thumbs: foo monkey: Nearly all my idiot cousins did 23&me a few years back for Xmas, so I'm boned.

Submit your own profile to 23&me using a hobo's DNA. If the cops check, it will just look like you're adopted.


There was a Law & Order episode where a doctor implanted a tube in his arm (where you'd normally take out blood) and filled it with a patient's blood (this part was "ripped from the headlines" from a doctor in Canada IIRC) so he wouldn't get caught for a murder, but his patient had raped somebody years earlier and so the cops thought they cleared a cold case (whoopsie; and, this part not "ripped from the headlines").
 
2021-04-14 6:43:48 PM  

Thosw: Wasn't there a cold case solved by the pollen from a lone tree found near the body?


By Batman and Encyclopedia Brown?
 
2021-04-14 8:29:16 PM  

Troy Aikman's Giant Thumbs: foo monkey: Nearly all my idiot cousins did 23&me a few years back for Xmas, so I'm boned.

Submit your own profile to 23&me using a hobo's DNA. If the cops check, it will just look like you're adopted.


What is the hobo was a serial rapist?
 
2021-04-14 9:50:15 PM  

pirviii: Troy Aikman's Giant Thumbs: foo monkey: Nearly all my idiot cousins did 23&me a few years back for Xmas, so I'm boned.

Submit your own profile to 23&me using a hobo's DNA. If the cops check, it will just look like you're adopted.

What is the hobo was a serial rapist?


I'll make sure to not steal Bill Cosby's blood.
 
2021-04-14 9:54:24 PM  

BretMavrik: John List Taken Down By Sculpture And Optometry

... They just couldn't find him. His car was located at the Kennedy International Airport, so they had a nagging suspicion that he was no longer in New Jersey, but for almost 20 years, it was like he'd vanished without a trace. In 1989, they brought out the big guns: John Walsh...

For some reason, I actually remember that episode of AMW.


Police found a man murdered in the trunk of his car at long term parking at DFW many years ago.  Murderer kill the guy and then drive to the airport to catch a flight out of town. Police figured he'd been in the trunk for 6 months.
 
2021-04-14 11:34:12 PM  
When police executed a search warrant on Lovrien's property in May 2020, hoping to find Dribin's body, they found ... a completely different body. This one belonged to a local homeless man named Kenneth Griffin, who had gone missing a few months earlier and somehow found its way into Lovrien's shed...

...We're not naming names because as of March 2021, Lovrien has pled not guilty on all counts and hasn't been convicted, but police figured the whole thing looked murdery enough to arrest him for both deaths


John Wayne Gacy admitted to one murder, but told the cops that the 26 bodies under his house were a mystery, some weirdo must have put them there.
 
2021-04-15 12:12:29 AM  

pirviii: Troy Aikman's Giant Thumbs: foo monkey: Nearly all my idiot cousins did 23&me a few years back for Xmas, so I'm boned.

Submit your own profile to 23&me using a hobo's DNA. If the cops check, it will just look like you're adopted.

What is the hobo was a serial rapist?


Use a Canadian hobo so you can prove you weren't in country.
 
2021-04-15 2:21:49 AM  

Troy Aikman's Giant Thumbs: pirviii: Troy Aikman's Giant Thumbs: foo monkey: Nearly all my idiot cousins did 23&me a few years back for Xmas, so I'm boned.

Submit your own profile to 23&me using a hobo's DNA. If the cops check, it will just look like you're adopted.

What is the hobo was a serial rapist?

Use a Canadian hobo so you can prove you weren't in country.


encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.comView Full Size
 
2021-04-15 5:34:41 AM  
ThEy FiXeD tHe CaBlE¿
 
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