Skip to content
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Daily Mail)   How would you spend a trillion dollars? Difficulty: it has to be on making the world a better place, not furnishing your condominium with hookers and blow   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line
    More: Interesting  
•       •       •

177 clicks; posted to Discussion » on 08 Mar 2021 at 3:50 AM (5 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



65 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all

 
2021-03-08 12:57:23 AM  
Global infrastructure. 
West Wing - CJ Gregg offered $10 billion charitable organization
Youtube Ixgp9c_sGv4
 
2021-03-08 1:00:36 AM  
HOOKERS AND BLOW! HOOKERS AND BLOW!

** reads rest of headline **

damn!
 
2021-03-08 1:06:03 AM  
End the war on drugs and fight against human trafficking so that prostitution can be done safely and legally in a protected environment.
 
2021-03-08 1:06:41 AM  
Build monorails everywhere.

And a couple Zeppelins.
 
2021-03-08 1:06:43 AM  

ababyatemydingo: HOOKERS AND BLOW! HOOKERS AND BLOW!

** reads rest of headline **

damn!


Hookers and blow for a million people would make the world a better place.  Maybe not as efficiently as say, clean water for a billion people, but there are no wrong answers with this kind of headline.
 
2021-03-08 1:07:08 AM  

Anenu: so that prostitution can be done safely and legally in a protected environment.


Like on a Zeppelin.
 
2021-03-08 1:08:26 AM  
World's biggest pizza. Who doesn't like pizza?
 
2021-03-08 1:11:48 AM  
Or maybe 10,000 libraries, each worth 100 million dollars.
 
2021-03-08 1:13:10 AM  
Here's why world's biggest pizza is the best idea:

1. Massive amount of food: lots of mouths get fed
2. Mass job creation: everything from cheese production, wheat harvesting, making and baking said pizza.
3. New technologies/innovations: we're gonna make a massive pie the size of a small nation. We're going to need some way to cook such a huge dish
 
2021-03-08 1:16:24 AM  
Point of order: it WOULD make the world a better place

/For me
 
2021-03-08 1:22:58 AM  
I would build a McMansion out of $1 bills, then burn it down and collect the insurance money.
 
2021-03-08 1:27:28 AM  
There would be 5 new medical schools that train MDs and RNs. No tuition but everyone has to spend 20 hours a week volunteering at local clinics and nursing homes. Each school would include satellite clinics and residential care facilities. I would also create 3 pharmaceutical companies to develop cheaper, cost effective therapeutics/diagnostics. All products to be made available on a cost neutral basis with some revenue feeding back into the endowment that keep the lights on and the staff paid.

I would also create an endowment to support community theatre all over the US, probably on a matching funds basis. Ideally, it would provide support for public schools to put on accessible productions teamed up with a community playhouse. Emphasis would be building community, not catering to self-indulgent wanna-be stars.

Problem is, it takes time to grow organizations to do that well, especially picking the right people to get it going. And it takes time to cultivate the development of the people you hire to make it happen.
 
2021-03-08 1:47:20 AM  
I'd fix up all the buildings in America's decrepit public school system. And then I'd make sure every district had a state-of-the-art auditorium for concerts. And with the remainder, I'd buy internet access and tablets or computers for every kid who needs one.

That might cost more than a trillion dollars, but I'd also lobby Congress to tax the f*ck out of the billionaire class.
 
2021-03-08 1:50:22 AM  

wademh: There would be 5 new medical schools that train MDs and RNs. No tuition but everyone has to spend 20 hours a week volunteering at local clinics and nursing homes. Each school would include satellite clinics and residential care facilities. I would also create 3 pharmaceutical companies to develop cheaper, cost effective therapeutics/diagnostics. All products to be made available on a cost neutral basis with some revenue feeding back into the endowment that keep the lights on and the staff paid.

I would also create an endowment to support community theatre all over the US, probably on a matching funds basis. Ideally, it would provide support for public schools to put on accessible productions teamed up with a community playhouse. Emphasis would be building community, not catering to self-indulgent wanna-be stars.

Problem is, it takes time to grow organizations to do that well, especially picking the right people to get it going. And it takes time to cultivate the development of the people you hire to make it happen.


If you get a trillion dollars, I'll add mine to yours. We can work together.
 
2021-03-08 2:33:18 AM  
Why don't we just spend like Republicans: Tax cuts for the rich and oppression for everyone else (espeically people of a different skin color)?
 
2021-03-08 2:35:33 AM  
I'd give everyone $115 and keep 100 billion for personal expenses.
 
Xai [TotalFark]
2021-03-08 3:00:53 AM  
Invest in construction of fusion power plants for a much of the world as possible. Yes I have got an idea, no I don't have the $25m to build a test reactor to test it.
 
2021-03-08 3:03:39 AM  
That should be able to provide enough free health care to people to ruin the health insurance industry.
 
2021-03-08 3:08:07 AM  
I'd rid the world of the scourge of cat-juggling.
 
2021-03-08 3:53:09 AM  
That could feed and house a lot of people
 
2021-03-08 3:57:44 AM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Point of order: it WOULD make the world a better place

/For me


And in doing so, for everyone around you. It trickles down.
 
2021-03-08 4:40:03 AM  
Serious answer?  I'd ask Bill Gates for advice and do what he says.  I'm sure he knows how to scale his own efforts up 10X.
 
2021-03-08 5:07:10 AM  
Is it absorbent?

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-03-08 5:27:12 AM  
No hookers and cocaine?

The fark's the point of living then?
 
2021-03-08 5:37:58 AM  
Thats probably what it would cost to hire the top assassins to take out the political structure, cheif executives, and multi billionares in every country


And before someone tries to tell me that would make the government non functional, remember that we need to have a functional government for that argument to even try and work
 
2021-03-08 6:35:45 AM  
Extend high speed fiber internet into as many rural areas as possible, and launch an advertising campaign to subsidize professionals that can work from home to move into those rural areas. Eases the housing market in cities and promotes educated people living -and voting- in those areas.

I'd also lobby to introduce penalties to holding empty homes as investments. Either rent it out, sell it, or pay the equivalent of what your rent income would be to hold it.
 
2021-03-08 6:39:08 AM  
Wow. A trillion. That is 1000 billions. or 200  5 billions.

OK. Here goes.
Immediately 200 billion goes to solar PV projects in developing nations to forestall investment in coal generation facilities. I will look for matching funds where possible and try to arrange loan guarantees so that this money will go as far as possible. It will go a long way in developing countries. Stop coal and oil use for electric generation.


Immediately 100 billion in solar PV projects in Mid East countries and Saharan African countries to forestall oil use for generation of electricity.

Immediately 200 billion invested in loan guarantees in the following countries to create electricity gluts of large proportions, either temporary or permanent. This is my creative destruction mad scientist move. Japan, Australia, Spain, Korea, and one other country. Maybe Mexico. Their grids will be saturated with electricity production and they will be forced to find creative ways to use the energy, store it, transport it, or transform it. Will it be hydrogen? WIll it be a new industry or new form of agriculture? Who knows? All proceeds from electricity sales go into increasing renewable capacity.

Immediately 100 billion allocated to my new space launch system to send huge amounts of volatile gases to a "gas station" I will set up at a LaGrange point for use as reaction mass or for various chemical reactions in space in the near future.

Immediately 10 billion to provide hybrid fleet vehicles to middle level developing countries for government use. They will be cheap utilitarian vehicles that are rugged and dependable.

Immediately 5 billion to provide battery or hydrogen fleet vehicles for government use in the US.

That leaves me 390 billion plus revenues from other ventures above if they are not done strictly pro bono.
5 billion each to develop profitable or non-profit solutions for

- ending natural gas flaring at production sites
- better home heating technologies
- modular, capsule style, safe, secure sleeping technologies for homeless people worldwide.
- vocational training in infrastructure repair skills, structural engineering, structural evaluation
- improved plastic recycling, reduced use of plastics, methods of reusing them
- tree planting in the most feasible areas (low hanging fruit)
- small to medium sized freight vessels running only on renewable energy, designed for use at smaller disused ports
- aquaculture and agriculture research to produce productive systems for use with renewable energy.
- a professional international disaster response team working and training 24/7
- a professional international team for preventing war and political murder 24/7
- 100 grants awarded each year to take reported research breakthroughs and make them useful and practical.
- I am Andrew Carnegie: any YouTube video related renewable energy, DIY, recycling, or international understanding is ad free, forever.
- I am Andrew Carnegie too: Wikipedia funded for a decade or so.
- no interest loans for rooftop PV solar for retail outlets with 4 or more refrigeration units.
- interest bearing loans for same for retail outlets with three or fewer refrigeration units.

Not much of the above competes with tax funded programs. But all of them are expected to improve quality of life. People will have to decide best what to do with tax money, but they can do that, I can give everyone a better world.
 
2021-03-08 6:41:40 AM  
Yes. I will need a staff for that. I might find some takers.

/that is probably ALL I will find.
 
2021-03-08 6:57:09 AM  
🎶
If I had a trillion dollars (If I had a trillion dollars)
Well I'd buy you a green dress
But not a real green dress, that's cruel
🎶
 
2021-03-08 7:39:18 AM  
There are people that try to rank the relative values of charities. It's difficult.

Do you value running water over transport infrastructure or an electrical grid.

Me. It's all going to infrastructure and electrical / internet grids.
 
2021-03-08 7:40:53 AM  
Put the required money in to design/develop Thorium reactors probably.

Design/develop the process for purifying thorium from soil/the environment.

Give grants for localities to build them, under the stipulation that the cost can't be raised over $0.01/kwh for 100 years and a day.

Set $200 million prizes for major advancements in battery technology, each prize awarded for a higher capacity battery than the last by an agreeable margin, with $100 million kickers for designs that don't use rare earth metals.

Grants to build them in low income/developing nations under the stipulation that the energy will be distributed for free for the next 100 years and a day.

Investing the money in low gain/reliable mutual funds to continue the growth of the money for as long as the endowment exists, primarily for paying those who work at the low return power stations

Spend money granted by the mutual funds on hookers and blow (technically not the $1 trillion, as it was gained after the initial endowment) for those who decrease worldsuck. Or, you know, paying them to continue doing so.
 
2021-03-08 8:07:37 AM  
Subby doesn't understand how this works: if I furnish my condominium with hookers and blow for a trillion dollars, that takes a rather significant percentage of either of them out of circulation for everyone else, therefore making the world a better place.

See how I'd be willing to suffer for the greater good?
 
2021-03-08 8:14:17 AM  
Buy as much medical and student debt as possible with that money and then cancel the debt.

If only we could form some sort of human union to do shiat like that. We could fund it by paying dues and agree upon rules and use the union to do good things for people who need help.
 
2021-03-08 8:21:00 AM  
I'd rebuild Detroit.  Infrastructure, schools, public housing transitioning into home ownership.  Financial considerations for businesses to set up facilities and stay there.  Green energy.  Tear down the slums and make it a good place to live.  Free training programs in any relevant discipline for locals who want to work and stay.  Major incentives for Michiganders to come back into the city and live there.  If successful, I'd move onto another impoverished city in the US.  This is what should be done instead of reparations, and since no one in DC will ever be capable of pulling it off, I would do it myself.

I'd probably buy the Red Wings a farking goal scorer or three, also.  But even I can't help the Lions.
 
2021-03-08 8:21:49 AM  

Maker_of_Roads: Put the required money in to design/develop Thorium reactors probably.


Thorium/pebble bed reactors are the way to go. Fusion would be nice, as at least one poster notes above, but I think that will remain ten years off for at least the next fifty years. Go for what works, is safe, and which will have the greatest affect.

The best part of this is that the full $1T would not be necessary for this - use a sizable chunk of it to get things going, buy up a bunch of related, useful businesses with half of whatever's left in order to support and grow the project, and use the profits from those to add to whatever you have left over (which has been put into long-term investments) for the next moonshot.
 
2021-03-08 8:22:38 AM  
I'd build my own space station and live on it.

If that's not making the World a better place, I don't know what is.

Side benefit:  I'd invite women up to my station, and because of the cost of launching them and returning them, they'd pretty much be obligated to put out.
 
2021-03-08 8:25:45 AM  

Maker_of_Roads: Put the required money in to design/develop Thorium reactors probably.

Design/develop the process for purifying thorium from soil/the environment.


Sure.  That worked out really well for Jesper Berg and Norway.


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-03-08 8:34:40 AM  

writingdude: Thorium/pebble bed reactors are the way to go. Fusion would be nice, as at least one poster notes above, but I think that will remain ten years off for at least the next fifty years. Go for what works, is safe, and which will have the greatest affect.


Sure.  Sounds good.  Until the EU convinces Russia to invade your country to keep the supply of oil running.
 
2021-03-08 8:36:11 AM  
I'd think that would be enough to put rooftop solar on all houses/building where it would make sense to do so.
 
2021-03-08 8:37:55 AM  

dittybopper: I'd build my own space station and live on it.

If that's not making the World a better place, I don't know what is.

Side benefit:  I'd invite women up to my station, and because of the cost of launching them and returning them, they'd pretty much be obligated to put out.


Like a boat, but the implications are a lot colder and more difficult to breath in.

That and mirco gravity banging would probably be pretty cool. Win some award by shooting/photographing the first zero G facial or something. Have Morgan Freeman narrating, would be the best!
 
2021-03-08 8:39:23 AM  
Half to National Parks and environmental non-profits.

Half to build worlds largest marijuana emporium.
Epcot Center for weed.
 
2021-03-08 8:43:04 AM  

Maker_of_Roads: dittybopper: I'd build my own space station and live on it.

If that's not making the World a better place, I don't know what is.

Side benefit:  I'd invite women up to my station, and because of the cost of launching them and returning them, they'd pretty much be obligated to put out.

Like a boat, but the implications are a lot colder and more difficult to breath in.

That and mirco gravity banging would probably be pretty cool. Win some award by shooting/photographing the first zero G facial or something. Have Morgan Freeman narrating, would be the best!


I think that's already been done in a "vomit comet" type aircraft.
 
2021-03-08 8:45:54 AM  

dittybopper: Maker_of_Roads: dittybopper: I'd build my own space station and live on it.

If that's not making the World a better place, I don't know what is.

Side benefit:  I'd invite women up to my station, and because of the cost of launching them and returning them, they'd pretty much be obligated to put out.

Like a boat, but the implications are a lot colder and more difficult to breath in.

That and mirco gravity banging would probably be pretty cool. Win some award by shooting/photographing the first zero G facial or something. Have Morgan Freeman narrating, would be the best!

I think that's already been done in a "vomit comet" type aircraft.


Ehh, probably, but it's not the same. When I can see it splash warmly across someone with a cupola open to the breadth of the entire world and the endless void in the background and know it's real, then I'll be happy.
 
2021-03-08 9:48:57 AM  
condoms.
Free comdoms, everywhere.
And a space to explain there is no god.
No prophets no saviors

Stop breeding like rabbits because a man in a dress told you to.
Stop worshiping spooks, and voodoo, and dead guys on sticks.

Free education to any kid who want to go to college, on the stipulation that they learn three new languages and pass three arts classes to graduate.

Clean drinking water and lobby to execute any CEO of any corporation that pollutes waterways directly or indirectly.

You want to make the world a better place? You best be prepared to kill the monsters.
 
2021-03-08 9:52:39 AM  
Buy a crapload of real estate in Belize and run a dog rescue.  There's many reasons to love Belize, but their treatment of dogs isn't one of them.
 
2021-03-08 10:35:18 AM  
I would start a very large center for training dogs to sniff out cancer and covid.

I would name it after my sister who died of ovarian cancer at the age of 42.

Most women don't know that a pap smear does not include a test for ovarian cancer.

Ovarian cancer ranks fifth in cancer deaths among women, accounting for more deaths than any other cancer of the female reproductive system. A woman's risk of getting ovarian cancer during her lifetime is about 1 in 78. Her lifetime chance of dying from ovarian cancer is about 1 in 108. (These statistics don't count low malignant potential ovarian tumors.)

I would also specialize in testing for testicular cancer.  I am not forgetting about you men!
 
2021-03-08 10:38:00 AM  
Everyone in the USA gets a free assault rifle, WHOO 2nd Amendment!


Seriously though getting solar panels on every roof and clean drinking water to as much of the world as possible would be my main goals.
 
2021-03-08 10:52:35 AM  

crzybtch: I would start a very large center for training dogs to sniff out cancer and covid...
....


Thats it - crzybtch gets my trillion.
 
2021-03-08 10:58:01 AM  
For amusement I went to check the market cap of a few companies.  I figure I could get controlling interest of a couple of key organizations with 1 trillion.  If I could get Facebook and one major oil company, I figure I'm in a damn good position to really influence things.  Use the platform to really steer toward a clean energy future and things like UBI.
 
2021-03-08 11:05:39 AM  
I'd start with education and mental health, which bare chronically underfunded.  All the technologies and infrastructure ideas listed so far  are important, but half the population is dumb, crazy, or both, and until we fix that, you can't get much of the rest of the cool things to fruition. Bonus; with smarter, less crazy people, the rest of that list gets done faster in the end.
 
Displayed 50 of 65 comments


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all


View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking





On Twitter



  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.