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(Palm Beach Post)   Husband: You'll never find my wife's body. Police: You forget what state we are in Florida man. Challenge accepted   (palmbeachpost.com) divider line
    More: Florida  
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9001 clicks; posted to Main » on 07 Mar 2021 at 1:20 AM (9 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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2021-03-07 10:49:43 AM  

poorjon: "Gomez-Mulett was an immigrant working as a caretaker for Colon's mother, who suffered from dementia, and in exchange, he married her weeks after they had met so she could obtain U.S. citizenship, he told police."

That is one tortured sentence
---


And he just incriminated himself on breaking another law.
 
2021-03-07 10:59:03 AM  

Doctor Poop: LineNoise: Resident Muslim: phalamir: TommyDeuce: Cafe Threads: ...investigators found her remains in his backyard.

"That's the last place they'll look!"

Yeah, you live in a place with swamps full of gators, an ocean full of sharks and crabs and such and you hide the corpse in your OWN BACK YARD and then taunt the cops about never finding it?

farking moron.

I actually own a 1/4 acre of swampland in North Florida that is underwater at least 12 hours a day - I have offered it's "use" to friends.  They usually roll their eyes until I show them where it is on a map and mention the gator concentration.  Then I get less eyerolling and more side-eye.

Will you please stop mentioning it over friendly poker games?!

"Hey steve....wondering if i can borrow some of your tools.....my wife's car....."
"You know....i have a 1/4 of an acre of swampland, with gators, under water half the day......."
"Steve, i just need a 9mm socket...."

Wtf kind of car has 9mm hardware literally anywhere?


I pulled the number out of my ass, but its always what is missing when i go to look for it.

One of my cars is german, the other is more or less german with an american nameplate.

Its mainly trim shiat.
 
2021-03-07 11:02:11 AM  
And honestly i think german engineers chose that size just because its what everyone loses.

Hanz: "what size should we use for this?"
Fritz: "It doesn't matter. Lets go with 9mm, everyone loses those or buys a cheap set without them. Teaches them to pay more attention to their tools"
 
2021-03-07 11:31:28 AM  

LineNoise: And honestly i think german engineers chose that size just because its what everyone loses.

Hanz: "what size should we use for this?"
Fritz: "It doesn't matter. Lets go with 9mm, everyone loses those or buys a cheap set without them. Teaches them to pay more attention to their tools"


VW used to use 10 and 13 everywhere exacpt of very oddball stuff which would be 11 or 14 which means "read the manual before you remove this bolt".  Like the one for the clutch cable because if you didn't clean the area before you removed it, it would dump a bunch of dirt into the transmission.
 
2021-03-07 11:59:21 AM  

Snargi: Snargi: SloppyFrenchKisser: [i.pinimg.com image 733x616]

Some meth head stole a trumpet out of my car and then tried to sell it to the same music store I had bought it from. He ran out of the store when the owner set the horn behind the counter and said I know who owns this turmpet. trumpet.


/I have a hard time spelling anything with trump in it.


But putting your lips on it is ok?
 
2021-03-07 1:11:16 PM  

OtherLittleGuy: Anyone know where Melania is these days?


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-03-07 1:15:10 PM  

Snargi: Snargi: SloppyFrenchKisser: [i.pinimg.com image 733x616]

Some meth head stole a trumpet out of my car and then tried to sell it to the same music store I had bought it from. He ran out of the store when the owner set the horn behind the counter and said I know who owns this turmpet. trumpet.


/I have a hard time spelling anything with trump in it.


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-03-07 1:51:15 PM  
"Ha, ha.  You're never going to find her body."
"You mean the dead body of your wife that you killed?"
"Yes, the lifeless corpse of my wife that I confess to murdering."
"If only we had something to charge you with.  Dang it!"
 
2021-03-07 1:56:54 PM  
Before reading I honestly wouldn't have guessed the backyard. I'd assume that's high on the list of places they'd look, but not that he was dumb enough to do that. Guess he showed me.
 
2021-03-07 9:01:14 PM  

ChubbyTiger: phalamir: TommyDeuce: Cafe Threads: ...investigators found her remains in his backyard.

"That's the last place they'll look!"

Yeah, you live in a place with swamps full of gators, an ocean full of sharks and crabs and such and you hide the corpse in your OWN BACK YARD and then taunt the cops about never finding it?

farking moron.

I actually own a 1/4 acre of swampland in North Florida that is underwater at least 12 hours a day - I have offered it's "use" to friends.  They usually roll their eyes until I show them where it is on a map and mention the gator concentration.  Then I get less eyerolling and more side-eye.

Gotta ask, why? I'd get owning a huge chunk of swamp, but 1/4 acre? What can you do with it?


I inherited it.  It used to be a big-ass piece of land, but the family had a couple generations of that "every person of each generation gets an equal slice" bullshiat.  So, know I have a useless 1/4 acre.  It costs me $7/year in property taxes - and only because that ends up being the county's minimum.  I'm tempted to just stop paying the property tax and let the county have it - but being able to make the terrible "I can gator a corpse for you" joke is so far worth it.
 
2021-03-07 9:02:58 PM  

Resident Muslim: phalamir: TommyDeuce: Cafe Threads: ...investigators found her remains in his backyard.

"That's the last place they'll look!"

Yeah, you live in a place with swamps full of gators, an ocean full of sharks and crabs and such and you hide the corpse in your OWN BACK YARD and then taunt the cops about never finding it?

farking moron.

I actually own a 1/4 acre of swampland in North Florida that is underwater at least 12 hours a day - I have offered it's "use" to friends.  They usually roll their eyes until I show them where it is on a map and mention the gator concentration.  Then I get less eyerolling and more side-eye.

Oh, and if it's under water half the time and has a high gator population, I'd argue that you just own a piece of paper titled "deed".


I think you are just jealous.
 
2021-03-07 11:11:00 PM  
Christ, if the cops searched my house for blood splatters and stains they'd find a-plenty.  Especially in my kitchen and garage, and it's all mine.

/When you drop a chef knife you jsut sharpened, just let it fall
//And F*CK that jointer in my garage
///Jointer my ass, it didn't make it past the fingernail...although almost a year later I still can't type with that finger
 
2021-03-08 7:11:19 AM  

phalamir: Resident Muslim: phalamir: TommyDeuce: Cafe Threads: ...investigators found her remains in his backyard.

"That's the last place they'll look!"

Yeah, you live in a place with swamps full of gators, an ocean full of sharks and crabs and such and you hide the corpse in your OWN BACK YARD and then taunt the cops about never finding it?

farking moron.

I actually own a 1/4 acre of swampland in North Florida that is underwater at least 12 hours a day - I have offered it's "use" to friends.  They usually roll their eyes until I show them where it is on a map and mention the gator concentration.  Then I get less eyerolling and more side-eye.

Oh, and if it's under water half the time and has a high gator population, I'd argue that you just own a piece of paper titled "deed".

I think you are just jealous.


Not really. Never need to dispose a body.

/better to watch them suffer
//kidding
///better to live my life and have faith in God's destiny
 
2021-03-08 9:08:49 AM  

phalamir: ChubbyTiger: phalamir: TommyDeuce: Cafe Threads: ...investigators found her remains in his backyard.

"That's the last place they'll look!"

Yeah, you live in a place with swamps full of gators, an ocean full of sharks and crabs and such and you hide the corpse in your OWN BACK YARD and then taunt the cops about never finding it?

farking moron.

I actually own a 1/4 acre of swampland in North Florida that is underwater at least 12 hours a day - I have offered it's "use" to friends.  They usually roll their eyes until I show them where it is on a map and mention the gator concentration.  Then I get less eyerolling and more side-eye.

Gotta ask, why? I'd get owning a huge chunk of swamp, but 1/4 acre? What can you do with it?

I inherited it.  It used to be a big-ass piece of land, but the family had a couple generations of that "every person of each generation gets an equal slice" bullshiat.  So, know I have a useless 1/4 acre.  It costs me $7/year in property taxes - and only because that ends up being the county's minimum.  I'm tempted to just stop paying the property tax and let the county have it - but being able to make the terrible "I can gator a corpse for you" joke is so far worth it.


I hadn't thought of that possibility. Makes sense. I'd keep it too, just for the jokes. And on the off chance that I really did need to  dispose of a body? Bonus.
 
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