Skip to content
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Fox 2 St. Louis)   Missouri man learns a valuable lesson during turkey mating season - and that lesson is turkeys are aggressive a-holes   ( divider line
    More: Amusing, Bird, Harry S. Truman, Wild Turkey, The Mating Season, Meteorologist Jaime Travers' husband, Elliott Davis, first thought, strong commitment  
•       •       •

2093 clicks; posted to Main » on 05 Mar 2021 at 11:50 AM (9 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook

Voting Results (Smartest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2021-03-05 12:32:59 PM  
3 votes:
Territorial Turkeys is the name of my Travelling Wilburys cover band.
2021-03-05 3:38:04 PM  
2 votes:
Do YOU like being disturbed while you're trying to mate?

Who's the real asshole here?
2021-03-05 12:16:57 PM  
2 votes:
Small dinosaurs walk among us.

/ and go good with cranberry sauce, but you have to earn it.
2021-03-05 11:55:16 AM  
2 votes:

Tr0mBoNe: I like how the link says 'local-idiot' instead of 'Missouri man' to refer to the husband of their own colleague.

Ha, great catch.
2021-03-05 11:51:55 AM  
2 votes:
Bob's Burgers did it.
2021-03-05 1:52:02 PM  
1 vote:
Wild turkeys are aggressive and stupid in the spring time.  They'll get in the middle of the road and challenge cars.  Damn annoying that people sit there waiting for the stupid bird to move, blocking traffic.  They won't move.  Just keep driving.  Either the turkey will get out of the way or cease to be a problem for future drivers.

If you are a pedestrian getting challenged by a big tom, you'll want to exercise some common sense.  Those bastards have spurs and can hurt you.
2021-03-05 12:56:12 PM  
1 vote:
Ages ago a coworker of mine told me a story of when he used to work on a turkey farm. He said they'd have to gear up in protective gear, like padding and shields and stuff, and carry lead pipes in to deal with the turkeys if they got too aggressive. I thought he was joking and started to laugh and he looks at me dead serious and says "They'll kill you. They'll gang up and murder you."

Still not sure if he was serious but I know birds can be aggressive. Got chased by a swan when I was kayaking once. Thought I'd have to nail him with the paddle if he kept chasing me.
2021-03-05 12:14:14 PM  
1 vote:
I had to punch a flying goose while running a 5k once. Part of the course was across the dam of a pond. As I approached the dam I saw a flock of about a dozen goslings in the middle of the road. I kept running, thinking they would just scatter ahead of me. Mother goose had a different idea. She came flying at me about 5 feet off the ground from my 2 o'clock direction. I didn't even break my stride. I hit her with a quick jab to the side of her head that sent her crashing to the ground behind me. I talked to someone at the finish line who said he saw the whole thing. He said she was standing up when he passed her.
2021-03-05 12:10:24 PM  
1 vote:
Tom turkeys are pretty nasty if there are hens around. A friend of my fathers had a pair, and that Tom would chase us kids if we ever got too close to Mrs Turkey. Between the Turkey and a rampaging flock of resident nasty ass geese, every time we would visit became a game of dodging the avian terror squad. Nightmare honking aside, it was a great place in the NJ pine barrens sitting on a lake. It's a state park now, which makes me happy it's been preserved, but at the same time a bit sad as all that's left is memories.
2021-03-05 12:00:11 PM  
1 vote:
I get offended when animals think they can ride on me.

Motherfu*kers dont even know about science.

media0.giphy.comView Full Size
2021-03-05 11:59:54 AM  
1 vote:
Missouri farmer gets two Greens in a row!
2021-03-05 11:55:50 AM  
1 vote:

Tr0mBoNe: I like how the link says 'local-idiot' instead of 'Missouri man' to refer to the husband of their own colleague.

Thanks for pointing that out.

On a different note, who here hasn't kicked out at a bird that's attacked him/her? Birds attack people, that's pretty much how it is. So why is this news?
2021-03-05 11:01:10 AM  
1 vote:
Same doofus that used a blowtorch to melt snow?
Displayed 13 of 13 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking

On Twitter

  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.