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(Slate)   "I'm a pre-law college student with a unique name who has managed to be above-board and professional. I Googled my name and found someone with the same name has a TikTok account posting unprofessional videos. How can I address this insanity?"   (slate.com) divider line
    More: Awkward, Want, Family, Need, better part of a year, Q. Traumatic birthday, best friends, contradictory needs, much time  
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462 clicks; posted to Discussion » on 03 Mar 2021 at 5:42 AM (5 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



51 Comments     (+0 »)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


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2021-03-02 10:14:26 PM  
Perhaps rework your online persona to use your middle initial, assuming this other guys doesn't share the same one. Other than that, not sure there's much you can do. Legally change your name...

Neither Michael Bolton, nor Jerry Gallo were amused either.
 
2021-03-02 11:55:27 PM  
Change your major to physics, invent a working time machine, go back in time to before you Googled your name. Don't Google your name.
Problem solved.
 
2021-03-03 12:04:14 AM  
Ted "The teddy bear" Bundy, and Jeff "The Def" Dahmer, say hello.
 
2021-03-03 12:21:54 AM  
So Martina Hingis is a party animal. Who knew.

/I'm off to TikTok in my bunk
 
2021-03-03 3:29:33 AM  
With a name like Donald Trump Jr, I believe that you have far more problems to worry about.
 
2021-03-03 4:02:40 AM  
I feel sorry for the children's book author that shows up when you Google my name.
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-03-03 4:49:24 AM  
I have the same name as a mildly-famous athlete, so it gives me nice cover online.
 
2021-03-03 5:52:13 AM  
I found out there's a guy in another who has the same middle and last name as me. His first name is different, but we both go by our middle names. I found this out when I had people following my Twitter, thinking I was him.
 
2021-03-03 6:37:05 AM  
The reply question down the column answers the question. You have to fight fire with fire and set up your own online presence, emphasizing your location and skills. Do it correctly and [Correct honorific] TikTok will not be the first thing on the list.

But, FARK? We aren't highlighting the lead letter? It's got every dysfunctional family trope in two paragraphs.
 
2021-03-03 6:38:10 AM  

propasaurus: Change your major to physics, invent a working time machine, go back in time to before you Googled your name. Don't Google your name.
Problem solved.


No. The clear answer is use the time machine and assassinate Mark Zuckerberg before he creates Facebook.
 
2021-03-03 6:40:07 AM  
You go one better, and post some truly offensive videos and ruin their career. You're pre-law, so it's not like you have any morals anyway.
 
2021-03-03 6:51:34 AM  
Living in the same town as someone with the same name is an even bigger nightmare. Every time that dude got arrested, I had to explain to my worried grandmother that it wasn't me she read about in the police blotter. And the endless phone calls from people that his wife gave my phone number to slow down the bill collectors were annoying. I got him back though when an auto shop called me to authorize an expensive repair on his car.
 
2021-03-03 7:08:24 AM  
You're a lawyer wannabe, emphasis wannabe. Obviously you sue your parents for giving you that name, then sue the other guy for the rights on your name, sue tik tok for letting him use the name and not banninating him for hurting your feelings. Also, get a tik tok account with almost the same name and post the boringest stuff ever, maybe the other dude will be sedated that way and stop posting stuff.
 
2021-03-03 7:11:36 AM  
Some guy with the exact same first, middle, and last name as me is a kiddie diddler.  Fortunately, he's 20 years older.
 
2021-03-03 7:14:07 AM  

Rapmaster2000: Some guy with the exact same first, middle, and last name as me is a kiddie diddler.  Fortunately, he's 20 years older.


So, Rapmaster2020?
 
2021-03-03 7:24:42 AM  
Ask the other person to change their name

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-03-03 7:41:31 AM  
There's another Dr.Fey on Fark who often makes immature and argumentative posts in the Sports and Politics tabs.  I don't want him mistaken for me.
 
2021-03-03 7:48:04 AM  
Butt stuff.
 
2021-03-03 7:54:59 AM  
My last name is a common abbreviation, so there is no way anyone can get anything embarrassing on me.

Go ahead and try, my name is Richard Ufia.
 
2021-03-03 8:11:38 AM  
Use a middle initial, and add 'esquire' at the end

/tell people "why should I change? he's the one that sucks!"
 
2021-03-03 8:11:44 AM  

Rapmaster2000: Some guy with the exact same first, middle, and last name as me is a kiddie diddler.  Fortunately, he's 20 years older.


So he's too old eh?  Hmm...
 
2021-03-03 8:20:19 AM  

Dr.Fey: There's another Dr.Fey on Fark who often makes immature and argumentative posts in the Sports and Politics tabs.  I don't want him mistaken for me.


Conversely, I make witty and insightful remarks under a number of pseudonyms
 
2021-03-03 8:43:52 AM  
Just because your methy parents named you "Party Girl Goes Wild" Jameson doesn't mean you must keep that name forever.
 
2021-03-03 8:53:17 AM  
Just show everyone you know the texts, if they do not see anything wrong in what they are doing they won't mind.
 
2021-03-03 9:07:22 AM  
Apparently your name is not unique.
 
2021-03-03 9:08:55 AM  
My real name, Mr. Biggus Dickus, has always been both a blessing and a curse.
 
2021-03-03 9:10:26 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-03-03 9:24:23 AM  
I share a name with a gay porn actor. I bought ourname.com from his studio after he quit the business.
 
2021-03-03 9:32:29 AM  

My Third Testicle: I share a name with a gay porn actor. I bought ourname.com from his studio after he quit the business.


Username checks out.
 
2021-03-03 9:45:00 AM  

My Third Testicle: I share a name with a gay porn actor. I bought ourname.com from his studio after he quit the business.


Used to know a guy named Jeff Stryker - he said it was always fun to play, "Spot who knows that name."   And then watch them try to pretend they had no idea.
 
2021-03-03 10:10:58 AM  
"Unique"
 
2021-03-03 10:19:53 AM  
I live out in the country where houses are generally a city block or more apart - not closely packed for sure. In my rural coop phone company's phone book there are* three other guys with the same given name and two with the same middle initial within a mile of me. It's a pretty common name.

But they're a nicely progressive phone company - my internet is delivered via fiber optic cable.

*or were. Don't have a phone book near me to see if the number has gone up or down.
 
2021-03-03 10:20:17 AM  

propasaurus: Change your major


Yes dear god, CHANGE YOUR MAJOR! Pre-law is not a major!
 
2021-03-03 10:45:18 AM  
How often do companies make hiring decisions based on a google search?

I don't have  social media (facebook, twitter, any-o-dat), so what would potential employers find out about me?  Nothing.
 
2021-03-03 10:56:06 AM  

tdyak: How often do companies make hiring decisions based on a google search?


These days it's pretty much every time. If you're applying to Walmart or McDonalds, I doubt they care much, but in any professional job it's a given they will Google your name.
 
2021-03-03 11:55:46 AM  
1) It's A Family Affair: DTMFA

I should note, this same letter was in Savage Love if you want to see a different advice columnist's response:  Linky

2) It Wasn't Me: I have a common name combination.  3 of us in my high school.  Caused a lot of confusion. In short, GTHOI.

3) It's My Party And I'll Cry If I Want To: With work, school or other life commitments, a lot of people don't have an opportunity to really celebrate their birthday on their actual birthday anymore.  Mom needs to be told to STFU and GTHOI.  You celebrate on your own terms.

4) But I Said, Clean Your Own Tables, Boys: Easy, don't go unless you are promised a seat with the adults.

5) I've Got To Pick Up My Soul And Move On: Tell your friend to STFU when they start in on that shiat.

6) Yeah, Your Hair's All Messed Up, You Know.  And Your Pants Don't Fit You Right: Only real solution is to take him to a place that can get clothes that are going to work.  Big and Tall stores exist for a reason.

7) You Stink! But I Love U: Prudie, quit stealing my bit!  Anyway, there's no real gentle way to get this across.  I do expect it's treatable, but might need to get a specialist, so to speak.

8) Family Affair II: It is rational to set up your own space so it's easy to see they are not you.

9) Never Been With A 10, But One Night I Had 5 Twos (Classic): GTHOI.
 
2021-03-03 12:04:29 PM  

Max Wedge: Living in the same town as someone with the same name is an even bigger nightmare. Every time that dude got arrested, I had to explain to my worried grandmother that it wasn't me she read about in the police blotter. And the endless phone calls from people that his wife gave my phone number to slow down the bill collectors were annoying. I got him back though when an auto shop called me to authorize an expensive repair on his car.


This is a large part of the plot of The Hunt (released last year right as the pandemic started), although such is actually a major third act spoiler (oh well).  IE, the main character that is being "hunted" (Crystal) shouldn't be there; the Hunters meant to get the other woman in her town with the same name instead.

The Hunters are all stereotypical liberals who were accused of arranging such a "people hunt" by some crazy right wing trolls in a Qanon style conspiracy theory and all got fired from their jobs because of it, so they decided to actually do such a thing for real by picking random crazy right wing trolls, and, um, hunting them.  They meant to pick crazy right wing troll Crystal but grabbed ex-Marine bad ass non-political Crystal instead, who proceeds to kill all of them.  Whoops.
 
2021-03-03 12:22:57 PM  

Max Wedge: Living in the same town as someone with the same name is an even bigger nightmare. Every time that dude got arrested, I had to explain to my worried grandmother that it wasn't me she read about in the police blotter. And the endless phone calls from people that his wife gave my phone number to slow down the bill collectors were annoying. I got him back though when an auto shop called me to authorize an expensive repair on his car.


Back in the Stone Ages, I worked with a guy with the same first and last name as me (middle initial was different). We get each other's mail and work and whatnot. I left that company after about a year.

Several years later, I started getting collector calls. It appears the other guy moved first to Nashville, then to Baton Rouge, and suffered some serious health reverses along the way. It took almost five years after that to convince everyone I wasn't him.
 
2021-03-03 12:50:17 PM  
austinchronicle.comView Full Size
 
2021-03-03 12:56:15 PM  
I occasionally got emails that were intended for an Assistant District Attorney in Alabama.
I'm afraid to actually Google my name because I keep seeing web ads for lawyers and criminal pardons.
 
2021-03-03 1:30:24 PM  

Myk-House of El: 1) It's A Family Affair: DTMFA

I should note, this same letter was in Savage Love if you want to see a different advice columnist's response: Linky


From that link:
"First-cousin marriages aren't legal in all U.S. states but they're legally recognized in almost all states. They're also legal and legally recognized in Canada, Mexico, the UK, the EU, Russia, and on and on. "

Rudy will be so relieved
 
2021-03-03 2:00:01 PM  
A guy on the block/street behind me had the same first and last name as I, but luckily he had a middle name, and I didn't.
 
2021-03-03 3:06:11 PM  

Max Wedge: Living in the same town as someone with the same name is an even bigger nightmare. Every time that dude got arrested, I had to explain to my worried grandmother that it wasn't me she read about in the police blotter. And the endless phone calls from people that his wife gave my phone number to slow down the bill collectors were annoying. I got him back though when an auto shop called me to authorize an expensive repair on his car.


Heh.  There is a guy in my town with the same name as me.  He got let go from his job and posted it on Facebook.  Alluvasudden, people at my job are looking at me and asking "I thought you got canned?" and saying "Oh, I hope you find another job".  I never met the guy....until one day:

I had to fly to Ft. Myers FL for business, booked my flight and went to the airport.  Checked in, got to the plane, and took my seat.  a few minutes later, flight crew comes up to me and says I have to wait at the back of the plane.  Me:  I have no idea WTF is going on. Eventually, it's all settled as I learn that that guy and me (and his family) booked the same damn flight on the same exact day as I did.
 
2021-03-03 3:09:14 PM  

My Third Testicle: I share a name with a gay porn actor. I bought ourname.com from his studio after he quit the business.


BuckNaked.com?
 
2021-03-03 6:29:55 PM  
Years ago, the top result for my name was someone arrested for DUI two states away. Now, it's some snake oil salesman appointed to a health & fitness advisory board in the Trump administration.

I'd rather have the DUI.
 
2021-03-03 9:09:55 PM  
My Google turned up the guy on Paul Harvey who stole a donut truck and was high speed chased by several cops. The optics on that are hilarious.

/yakkety sax
 
2021-03-04 7:48:16 AM  

Some Junkie Cosmonaut: My Third Testicle: I share a name with a gay porn actor. I bought ourname.com from his studio after he quit the business.

Used to know a guy named Jeff Stryker - he said it was always fun to play, "Spot who knows that name."   And then watch them try to pretend they had no idea.


Does he have a drink problem?

Airplane! drinking problem
Youtube pl4plPGRG8o
 
2021-03-04 8:33:17 AM  

dready zim: Some Junkie Cosmonaut: My Third Testicle: I share a name with a gay porn actor. I bought ourname.com from his studio after he quit the business.

Used to know a guy named Jeff Stryker - he said it was always fun to play, "Spot who knows that name."   And then watch them try to pretend they had no idea.

Does he have a drink problem?

[Youtube-video https://www.youtube.com/embed/pl4plPGR​G8o]


In this case it was more the fact that the semi-famous Jeff Stryker was known for porn.  More specifically well known for gay and bi porn.  He said there were some serious, "Oh that gu...  Oh shiat wait confused face nope haven't heard the name!" faces going on some dudes.
 
2021-03-04 10:13:12 AM  
So a law school student doesn't know the meaning of an absolute term like "unique." Keep studying.

This person is going to have bigger problems in pursuing a law career than this TikTok account.
 
2021-03-04 11:03:12 AM  

Some Junkie Cosmonaut: dready zim: Some Junkie Cosmonaut: My Third Testicle: I share a name with a gay porn actor. I bought ourname.com from his studio after he quit the business.

Used to know a guy named Jeff Stryker - he said it was always fun to play, "Spot who knows that name."   And then watch them try to pretend they had no idea.

Does he have a drink problem?

[Youtube-video https://www.youtube.com/embed/pl4plPGR​G8o]

In this case it was more the fact that the semi-famous Jeff Stryker was known for porn.  More specifically well known for gay and bi porn.  He said there were some serious, "Oh that gu...  Oh shiat wait confused face nope haven't heard the name!" faces going on some dudes.


Oh, I only know the Stryker from Airplane!. I just googled, and it seems he is Ted Stryker anyway.
 
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