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(Twitter)   "When the machine is lying idle in the car, please use glue to fix the vacuum cleaner, so as to avoid the traffic"   (twitter.com) divider line
    More: Weird, shot  
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4813 clicks; posted to Main » on 28 Feb 2021 at 3:24 PM (6 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



66 Comments     (+0 »)
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2021-02-28 10:57:46 AM  
Original Tweet:

 
2021-02-28 11:00:08 AM  
Is that before or after you've stoped Handstanding?
 
2021-02-28 11:07:15 AM  

Speaker2Animals: Is that before or after you've stoped Handstanding?


CNN says no.
 
2021-02-28 11:10:53 AM  
Do not taunt happy fun vacuum
 
2021-02-28 11:12:26 AM  
Looks like you got the instruction manual for the Suck-o-matic 9000 car Fleshlight.
 
2021-02-28 11:44:16 AM  
Chinese instructions run through google translate. Hilarious.
 
2021-02-28 11:52:43 AM  
Please stay away from children to avoid danger

True. True.
 
2021-02-28 12:15:54 PM  
I'm glad that when this kid grew up he was able to find a job writing vacuum cleaner instructions...

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2021-02-28 12:36:36 PM  
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2021-02-28 12:54:55 PM  
This is a reverse take on things, and always generates a larf or two..

Wonder what ever happened to the guy who hosts this stuff?

http://www.dontevenreply.com/view.php​?​post=110
 
2021-02-28 12:56:45 PM  
"Vacuum cleaner."
Yeah, sure. Whatever, dude.
 
2021-02-28 1:08:19 PM  
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2021-02-28 1:32:19 PM  
Just don't winnow with a fork.
 
2021-02-28 1:34:36 PM  
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2021-02-28 1:37:03 PM  
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2021-02-28 3:31:20 PM  
So it appears trump has found a new job writing instruction manuals ..
 
2021-02-28 3:31:26 PM  
Please stay away from children to avoid danger.

Always good advice.
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2021-02-28 3:32:19 PM  
Oh laugh all you want, but I want to see subby translating ANYTHING into Mandalorian.

//This is the way
 
2021-02-28 3:33:43 PM  
Vacuum cleaner's development team:
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2021-02-28 3:35:22 PM  
article: '...inserted flat mouth suction head...'

= recipe for getting a greenlit.
 
2021-02-28 3:39:47 PM  
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2021-02-28 3:40:28 PM  
So? WTF is number 7 trying to say?
 
2021-02-28 3:41:55 PM  
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2021-02-28 3:46:35 PM  
A user of mine had his department buy a pair of these small keyboards for him to code on, and the directions had some Engrish directions that said "Please to not be utilizing the gasoline to cleanse."
 
2021-02-28 3:47:22 PM  
The power supply!
 
2021-02-28 3:47:31 PM  

FarkingChas: So? WTF is number 7 trying to say?


Unplug and leave fixed while driving.
Isn't it obvious?
 
2021-02-28 3:48:02 PM  

Benjimin_Dover: A user of mine had his department buy a pair of these small keyboards for him to code on, and the directions had some Engrish directions that said "Please to not be utilizing the gasoline to cleanse."


And remember: always don't never forget to not look both ways before crossing the street!
 
2021-02-28 3:49:19 PM  

Benjimin_Dover: A user of mine had his department buy a pair of these small keyboards for him to code on, and the directions had some Engrish directions that said "Please to not be utilizing the gasoline to cleanse."


Years ago, I bought a desk from Office Max that came in a box. Built in Korea, the first line of the instruction was "It is advisory to be two persons during assembly."
 
2021-02-28 3:51:44 PM  
Be careful on this treadmill if you have deformed sex arthritis.

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2021-02-28 3:56:25 PM  
Always do the needful.
 
2021-02-28 3:57:41 PM  

Speaker2Animals: Be careful on this treadmill if you have deformed sex arthritis.

[Fark user image image 850x1133]


Menstruating women can't use it either
 
2021-02-28 4:00:43 PM  

markie_farkie: Looks like you got the instruction manual for the Suck-o-matic 9000 car Fleshlight.


Doesn't look like it.

I mean, from what I found on the internet.
 
2021-02-28 4:01:20 PM  
First also may to put greatest tab A very fine and through the around slotting.
 
2021-02-28 4:08:45 PM  

FarkingChas: So? WTF is number 7 trying to say?


Don't block the entryway/passageway

Assuming you are asking about the picture directly before your post.
 
2021-02-28 4:16:13 PM  
What the machine may look like:

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Obscure? Is anything obscure on Fark?
 
2021-02-28 4:22:09 PM  
"It is strictly forbidden to use the vacuum cleaner during summer and winter."
 
2021-02-28 4:27:15 PM  
Years ago the factory department I was running would get online resumes from the state that were always comically unsuitable for any position we had.  The best was from someone named Anthony A. Tynon who typed it like he was wearing boxing gloves while riding a motorcycle.  It became our office's version of The Eye of Argon because reading it out loud without cracking up was nigh impossible.

I posted it on the SA forums and a guy not only took up the challenge but turned it into a YTMND page.

Anthony A Tynon!
 
2021-02-28 4:53:03 PM  
also, my SO had instructions for some tool that warned:
'Stay away from your surroundings'
 
2021-02-28 4:57:57 PM  
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2021-02-28 4:59:02 PM  
thank you, Subby and commenters; that was sorely needed. *kisses*
 
2021-02-28 4:59:25 PM  

Zulu_as_Kono: Chinese instructions run through google translate. Hilarious.


I once asked a Chinese person, whose father worked in business over there, about the abysmal quality of ths translations. His reply? They don't give a fark. They already have your money, and every penny they don't waste on stuff like translators, safety testing, etc, is more profit; and it's all about making as much as you can, as fast as you can.
 
2021-02-28 5:01:38 PM  

markie_farkie: Looks like you got the instruction manual for the Suck-o-matic 9000 car Fleshlight.


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-02-28 5:03:06 PM  

Jeff73: Years ago the factory department I was running would get online resumes from the state that were always comically unsuitable for any position we had.  The best was from someone named Anthony A. Tynon who typed it like he was wearing boxing gloves while riding a motorcycle.  It became our office's version of The Eye of Argon because reading it out loud without cracking up was nigh impossible.

I posted it on the SA forums and a guy not only took up the challenge but turned it into a YTMND page.

Anthony A Tynon!


I have the Australian Siri read me stuff off the screen just for laughs sometimes.

Settings:Accessibility:spoken content:​speak selection
 
2021-02-28 5:03:43 PM  

Sexy Jesus: [Fark user image image 236x314]


The naughty palace doesn't seem appropriate for children.
 
2021-02-28 5:07:25 PM  
The above philosophy also explains why 20% of the Chinese products you buy,
do not work or are missing pieces.

"Fark it, ship it" Product not shipped is money lost. Functionality is unimportant.
 
2021-02-28 5:09:42 PM  
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2021-02-28 5:25:51 PM  

I just lurk here: [Fark user image 425x328]


I remember this, we had fax copies of this sign when I worked for a German machine tool company in the 90's. Every so often, someone would tack one up on a machine control panel. Thanks!
 
2021-02-28 5:32:10 PM  

mikalmd: So it appears trump has found a new job writing instruction manuals ..


Some people are saying he's the best instruction manual writer.
 
2021-02-28 5:39:54 PM  
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2021-02-28 5:56:42 PM  

jokerscrowbar: FarkingChas: So? WTF is number 7 trying to say?

Unplug and leave fixed while driving.
Isn't it obvious?


" 7. When the machine is lying idle in the car, please use glue to fix the vacuum cleaner, so as to avoid the traffic, the winnowing machine will turn on the vacuum cleaner by itself. "

And here's me thinking this machine has the powers to avoid traffic as long as you glue it right.
 
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