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(Taste of Home)   "I guess I am cooking my steak wrong" said literally no one ever   (tasteofhome.com) divider line
    More: Obvious, Olive oil, Beef, Flavor, tender flank steak, Cooking, Cooking oil, Steak, home cooks  
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1304 clicks; posted to Food » on 27 Feb 2021 at 9:38 AM (10 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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2021-02-27 8:00:21 AM  
I did.  Very early on in my cooking 'career,' I slathered a steak heavily in a creamy salad dressing marinade and cooked it in the oven.

Eureka!  I had discovered a new method for creating durable shoe leather, albeit one that is cost prohibitive from replacing the industry standard means.
 
2021-02-27 8:17:23 AM  
I'm not making any of those mistakes.

I did make the mistake of reading the article.
 
2021-02-27 9:40:37 AM  
lifehacker, is that you?
 
2021-02-27 9:48:57 AM  
And we get to the end and discovered the whole time they were grilling.
 
2021-02-27 9:55:59 AM  
Saw picture of author's steak, saw ramekin of barbecue sauce, closed article.
 
2021-02-27 9:56:23 AM  
LOL meat thermometer
 
2021-02-27 9:56:27 AM  
Pro common sense tip: Do not leave your steak in the freezer for a year before cooking. Especially a freezer that does not maintain an even freezing point.

(lucky I didn't get my stomach pumped)
 
2021-02-27 10:09:33 AM  

eviljimbo: LOL meat thermometer


Why?

Professional cooks in professional kitchens use meat thermometers constantly. They will always have one in their breast pocket and they will use it all of the time.

While there're many ballpark rules of thumb, none of them is a substitute for nor more accurate than actually measuring temperature.

The idea there's any special cred in doing things by feel rather than procedure & measurement is nonsense. Quite the opposite is the case. Restaurant chefs know this. They know that measuring temperature for steak doneness means fewer returned dishes or recooks and a confirmed perfectly-done dish. They know measuring portions when cooking & plating means every dish comes out the same, which means that customers get consistency and the business gets reliable use & order metrics.

I'm not even getting into baking, where going by feel ala une artiste is often a good way to waste ingredients on a crap result you have to toss because it's near-inedible.
 
2021-02-27 10:12:24 AM  

GregInIndy: eviljimbo: LOL meat thermometer

Why?


Because penis lololololololoololllolol;lollolollllll​llll
 
2021-02-27 10:12:47 AM  

GregInIndy: eviljimbo: LOL meat thermometer

Why?


Fark user imageView Full Size


GregInIndy: Professional cooks in professional kitchens use meat thermometers constantly.


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-02-27 10:17:24 AM  
I hate these lists that recycle wives tales as truths.

Grill your streaks cold. Unless you want them sitting on the counter for hours for very little benefit.
 
2021-02-27 10:26:02 AM  

GregInIndy: eviljimbo: LOL meat thermometer

Why?

Professional cooks in professional kitchens use meat thermometers constantly. They will always have one in their breast pocket and they will use it all of the time.

While there're many ballpark rules of thumb, none of them is a substitute for nor more accurate than actually measuring temperature.

The idea there's any special cred in doing things by feel rather than procedure & measurement is nonsense. Quite the opposite is the case. Restaurant chefs know this. They know that measuring temperature for steak doneness means fewer returned dishes or recooks and a confirmed perfectly-done dish. They know measuring portions when cooking & plating means every dish comes out the same, which means that customers get consistency and the business gets reliable use & order metrics.

I'm not even getting into baking, where going by feel ala une artiste is often a good way to waste ingredients on a crap result you have to toss because it's near-inedible.


Meh,

The Burger.avi
 
2021-02-27 10:47:31 AM  

Evil Mackerel: The Burger.avi


100% perfection.

/also lol the expression on the fry-guy's face at the very end is priceless!
 
2021-02-27 10:52:20 AM  
I know all that stuff already, I've learned it by trial and error.

Meat thermometers are for n00bs.

I'm grilling steaks today though.
 
2021-02-27 10:55:13 AM  
All wrong.

A proper steak is a well-marbled ribeye done sous vide at 122 for three hours, given a quick two minute per side sear in screaming hot cast iron, given a fast dredge through charcoal coals, screamed at for forty-five seconds by an irate Buddhist monk, glazed with onions caramelized in a movie theater popcorn popper and served on a cake of creosote chimney scrapings while Dick Van Dyke sobs relentlessly in the background in a bad English accent.

Now, you'll want a good side with that, so I'd start with a chiffon petticoat once worn by a back street madam in 18th century London, covered with bees and antelope marmalade. . . .
 
2021-02-27 11:00:02 AM  
This article is nothing new.  I was first told these tips by my dog.  He told me that he doesn't just want steak, he wants steak cooked properly.
 
2021-02-27 11:01:38 AM  
stealing from poltab... attadude!!!

Fark user imageView Full Size


/man I really need to re-re-re-watch that film
 
2021-02-27 11:10:30 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-02-27 11:14:03 AM  
The only proper way to cook a steak is however you like it best.
 
2021-02-27 11:27:51 AM  
Around thanksgiving last year I was replacing my toast oven and ended up with the ginormous air fryer/convection oven thing that actually has a steak setting.  It cooks for 10 min at about 500 deg, and the accompany manual suggested slathering the steaks in mayonnaise before cooking,  I was skeptical but curious so I gave it a shot with some 10 oz sirloins I had lying around.

Borzhe MOI those were good steaks.  Perfect medium on the inside and such a crust on the outside....
 
2021-02-27 11:34:40 AM  

toraque: All wrong.

A proper steak is a well-marbled ribeye done sous vide at 122 for three hours, given a quick two minute per side sear in screaming hot cast iron, given a fast dredge through charcoal coals, screamed at for forty-five seconds by an irate Buddhist monk, glazed with onions caramelized in a movie theater popcorn popper and served on a cake of creosote chimney scrapings while Dick Van Dyke sobs relentlessly in the background in a bad English accent.

Now, you'll want a good side with that, so I'd start with a chiffon petticoat once worn by a back street madam in 18th century London, covered with bees and antelope marmalade. . . .


I would only add that you need to caramelize those onions in a theater popcorn popper made before 1985. Model changes that year have rendered modern poppers incapable of achieving proper caramelization. I mean, if all you have is a modern popper, you might as well caramelize those onions in your air fryer.
 
2021-02-27 11:40:44 AM  

Magorn: Around thanksgiving last year I was replacing my toast oven and ended up with the ginormous air fryer/convection oven thing that actually has a steak setting.  It cooks for 10 min at about 500 deg, and the accompany manual suggested slathering the steaks in mayonnaise before cooking,  I was skeptical but curious so I gave it a shot with some 10 oz sirloins I had lying around.

Borzhe MOI those were good steaks.  Perfect medium on the inside and such a crust on the outside....


I guess that's a cousin to the diner method of grilled cheese.  Slather the bread in mayo instead of butter.
 
2021-02-27 11:48:44 AM  

Magorn: Around thanksgiving last year I was replacing my toast oven and ended up with the ginormous air fryer/convection oven thing that actually has a steak setting.  It cooks for 10 min at about 500 deg, and the accompany manual suggested slathering the steaks in mayonnaise before cooking,  I was skeptical but curious so I gave it a shot with some 10 oz sirloins I had lying around.

Borzhe MOI those were good steaks.  Perfect medium on the inside and such a crust on the outside....


I've seen the mayo suggestion before for searing sous vide cooked steaks, just haven't brought myself into trying it, maybe I will.

https://anovaculinary.com/want-a-wick​e​d-sear-grab-the-mayonnaise/
 
2021-02-27 11:52:46 AM  
also, get drunk before cooking, so if it sucks, you wont notice.

///i once ate the tampon that comes under the steak.
 
2021-02-27 11:55:50 AM  

Elvis Jagger Abdul-Jabbar: The only proper way to cook a steak is however you like it best.


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-02-27 12:01:55 PM  

mjones73: Magorn: Around thanksgiving last year I was replacing my toast oven and ended up with the ginormous air fryer/convection oven thing that actually has a steak setting.  It cooks for 10 min at about 500 deg, and the accompany manual suggested slathering the steaks in mayonnaise before cooking,  I was skeptical but curious so I gave it a shot with some 10 oz sirloins I had lying around.

Borzhe MOI those were good steaks.  Perfect medium on the inside and such a crust on the outside....

I've seen the mayo suggestion before for searing sous vide cooked steaks, just haven't brought myself into trying it, maybe I will.

https://anovaculinary.com/want-a-wicke​d-sear-grab-the-mayonnaise/


I haven't tried it, but Kenji Lopez Alt says that the benefits go beyond sous vide to many methods of cooking meat: https://www.nytimes.com/2019/10​/28/din​ing/mayo-meat-marinade.html
 
2021-02-27 12:02:21 PM  

aerojockey: [Fark user image image 600x905]


I LOL'd.

And that's coming from a guy who bought a sous vide machine back in December....and to be honest, they are the best steaks I have ever cooked at home.

/Team Medium Rare.
 
2021-02-27 12:03:44 PM  

mjones73: Magorn: Around thanksgiving last year I was replacing my toast oven and ended up with the ginormous air fryer/convection oven thing that actually has a steak setting.  It cooks for 10 min at about 500 deg, and the accompany manual suggested slathering the steaks in mayonnaise before cooking,  I was skeptical but curious so I gave it a shot with some 10 oz sirloins I had lying around.

Borzhe MOI those were good steaks.  Perfect medium on the inside and such a crust on the outside....

I've seen the mayo suggestion before for searing sous vide cooked steaks, just haven't brought myself into trying it, maybe I will.

https://anovaculinary.com/want-a-wicke​d-sear-grab-the-mayonnaise/


That looks about right for my results, though I did rough chop some fresh garlic to embed in the mayo to make i carmelize under the high heat, which was totally worth it
 
2021-02-27 12:06:04 PM  

Ivo Shandor: Elvis Jagger Abdul-Jabbar: The only proper way to cook a steak is however you like it best.

[Fark user image image 491x889]


That's from the episode where Hank joins a co-op, right? That episode is hysterically funny.

/ Bobby: These tomatoes taste amazing.
Peggy: quit lying, Bobby. Everyone knows tomatoes don't taste like anything.

// paraphrased
 
2021-02-27 12:08:38 PM  
I order chicken. That avoids the argument from the chef that steak tartare with the outsides singed is the only way to prepare a steak.
 
2021-02-27 12:09:17 PM  

Ivo Shandor: Elvis Jagger Abdul-Jabbar: The only proper way to cook a steak is however you like it best.

[Fark user image image 491x889]


I like your style. And I really miss that show.

Fark user imageView Full Size
Fark user imageView Full Size
Fark user imageView Full Size
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-02-27 12:13:39 PM  
One of my favorite steak seasonings:

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-02-27 12:26:55 PM  

italie: I'm not making any of those mistakes.

I did make the mistake of reading the article.


I went the extra mile, clicked on an internal link, and...

Q: What is your favorite cut of meat?
A: Cube steak
 
2021-02-27 12:39:11 PM  
My dad cooks steaks to well or worse...ALWAYS. A request for a rare steak will always result in well-done. My brother and I grew up slathering them with sauce to make them edible, and we thought that was normal.

Over my last few visits years ago, I found it easier to go full pescatarian to avoid those steaks.  They trolled me by only making overcooked steak for dinner, and I would troll back by leaving and coming back with sushi.

/ I get the itch to eat a steak maybe once a year, but it is always a high quality rare one. Cooking a steak to well is an insult to the cow.
 
2021-02-27 12:42:38 PM  

GregInIndy: eviljimbo: LOL meat thermometer

Why?

Professional cooks in professional kitchens use meat thermometers constantly. They will always have one in their breast pocket and they will use it all of the time.

While there're many ballpark rules of thumb, none of them is a substitute for nor more accurate than actually measuring temperature.

The idea there's any special cred in doing things by feel rather than procedure & measurement is nonsense. Quite the opposite is the case. Restaurant chefs know this. They know that measuring temperature for steak doneness means fewer returned dishes or recooks and a confirmed perfectly-done dish. They know measuring portions when cooking & plating means every dish comes out the same, which means that customers get consistency and the business gets reliable use & order metrics.

I'm not even getting into baking, where going by feel ala une artiste is often a good way to waste ingredients on a crap result you have to toss because it's near-inedible.


Yep, an instant read thermometer is one of my must have kitchen tools. Sure, I can fairly reliably cook a steak to desired doneness without one, but if I already have the thermometer that's useful for a ton of other things in the kitchen then why not use it here too?
 
2021-02-27 12:49:38 PM  

Dr.Fey: I did.  Very early on in my cooking 'career,' I slathered a steak heavily in a creamy salad dressing marinade and cooked it in the oven.

Eureka!  I had discovered a new method for creating durable shoe leather, albeit one that is cost prohibitive from replacing the industry standard means.


I grilled with my mate once.

He made skewers, fine, but then he covered them with Thousand Island dressing, so, that's where you were at.

But to top you, he had taken used, and discarded, grill mesh from the suction nachine above the stove, and used that as a grill to cook it on.

Wow that thing smelled and looked like a chemical fire, so he decided to instead grill his skewers on my cheapo one-time store bought grill. His skewers was still farked though, because Thousand Island isn't a marinade.
 
2021-02-27 12:50:04 PM  

Joey Jo Jo Jr Shabadu: GregInIndy: eviljimbo: LOL meat thermometer

Why?

Professional cooks in professional kitchens use meat thermometers constantly. They will always have one in their breast pocket and they will use it all of the time.

While there're many ballpark rules of thumb, none of them is a substitute for nor more accurate than actually measuring temperature.

The idea there's any special cred in doing things by feel rather than procedure & measurement is nonsense. Quite the opposite is the case. Restaurant chefs know this. They know that measuring temperature for steak doneness means fewer returned dishes or recooks and a confirmed perfectly-done dish. They know measuring portions when cooking & plating means every dish comes out the same, which means that customers get consistency and the business gets reliable use & order metrics.

I'm not even getting into baking, where going by feel ala une artiste is often a good way to waste ingredients on a crap result you have to toss because it's near-inedible.

Yep, an instant read thermometer is one of my must have kitchen tools. Sure, I can fairly reliably cook a steak to desired doneness without one, but if I already have the thermometer that's useful for a ton of other things in the kitchen then why not use it here too?


I got a thermometer set for Father's Day a few years back, best thing ever. It's got 6 color coded probes and connects to my phone via BT, so no opening the grill over and over, and only one hole in the steak. If they're all similar size, I'll just use one probe, but if I'm cooking with multiple doneness requests, or the meat varies in size, I can put them all on the grill and cook them correctly without having to fark about.

And 135 for med rare? Yeah, that's the biggest fail in TFA.
 
2021-02-27 12:51:28 PM  

Snaptastic: My dad cooks steaks to well or worse...ALWAYS. A request for a rare steak will always result in well-done. My brother and I grew up slathering them with sauce to make them edible, and we thought that was normal.

Over my last few visits years ago, I found it easier to go full pescatarian to avoid those steaks.  They trolled me by only making overcooked steak for dinner, and I would troll back by leaving and coming back with sushi.

/ I get the itch to eat a steak maybe once a year, but it is always a high quality rare one. Cooking a steak to well is an insult to the cow.


One of the proudest days of my life is when my dad turned over the grilling duties to me. 3 brothers, and grilling duties turned over to me. If I'm visiting, I go to the store with him to select the steaks too.

Of course if I end up at their house I always end up cooking, and then brothers and their families show up for dinner.

Then it just becomes stressful.

I avoid that these days.
 
2021-02-27 12:53:32 PM  

Elvis Jagger Abdul-Jabbar: The only proper way to cook a steak is however you like it best.


Indeed my friend.

Why do Americans tend to serve their steak pre-sliced? Is it because they don't know how to use a knife and fork, or does this make the steak better somehow?
 
2021-02-27 1:10:54 PM  

Mikey1969: And 135 for med rare? Yeah, that's the biggest fail in TFA.


Right along with the recommendation to sit your steaks out to "come up to room temp."

Sure, it won't hurt anything to do it but it will make virtually no difference in the outcome.
 
2021-02-27 1:29:18 PM  
I'm About to smoke an American wagyu tri-tip.
 
2021-02-27 1:42:53 PM  

Mikey1969: Joey Jo Jo Jr Shabadu: GregInIndy: eviljimbo: LOL meat thermometer

Why?

Professional cooks in professional kitchens use meat thermometers constantly. They will always have one in their breast pocket and they will use it all of the time.

While there're many ballpark rules of thumb, none of them is a substitute for nor more accurate than actually measuring temperature.

The idea there's any special cred in doing things by feel rather than procedure & measurement is nonsense. Quite the opposite is the case. Restaurant chefs know this. They know that measuring temperature for steak doneness means fewer returned dishes or recooks and a confirmed perfectly-done dish. They know measuring portions when cooking & plating means every dish comes out the same, which means that customers get consistency and the business gets reliable use & order metrics.

I'm not even getting into baking, where going by feel ala une artiste is often a good way to waste ingredients on a crap result you have to toss because it's near-inedible.

Yep, an instant read thermometer is one of my must have kitchen tools. Sure, I can fairly reliably cook a steak to desired doneness without one, but if I already have the thermometer that's useful for a ton of other things in the kitchen then why not use it here too?

I got a thermometer set for Father's Day a few years back, best thing ever. It's got 6 color coded probes and connects to my phone via BT, so no opening the grill over and over, and only one hole in the steak. If they're all similar size, I'll just use one probe, but if I'm cooking with multiple doneness requests, or the meat varies in size, I can put them all on the grill and cook them correctly without having to fark about.

And 135 for med rare? Yeah, that's the biggest fail in TFA.


Not only 135 for med rare, but also saying that is lower than usual to account for carry over cooking.
 
2021-02-27 1:44:46 PM  
"Britishly boiled" is wrong?
 
2021-02-27 1:53:18 PM  

The_Sponge: One of my favorite steak seasonings:

[Fark user image image 389x750]


That stuff is f*cking amazing on chicken.
 
2021-02-27 1:54:28 PM  

Ketchuponsteak: Dr.Fey: I did.  Very early on in my cooking 'career,' I slathered a steak heavily in a creamy salad dressing marinade and cooked it in the oven.

Eureka!  I had discovered a new method for creating durable shoe leather, albeit one that is cost prohibitive from replacing the industry standard means.

I grilled with my mate once.

He made skewers, fine, but then he covered them with Thousand Island dressing, so, that's where you were at.

But to top you, he had taken used, and discarded, grill mesh from the suction nachine above the stove, and used that as a grill to cook it on.

Wow that thing smelled and looked like a chemical fire, so he decided to instead grill his skewers on my cheapo one-time store bought grill. His skewers was still farked though, because Thousand Island isn't a marinade.


Anything is a marinade if you're brave enough.
 
2021-02-27 2:35:44 PM  

GregInIndy: eviljimbo: LOL meat thermometer

Why?

Professional cooks in professional kitchens use meat thermometers constantly. They will always have one in their breast pocket and they will use it all of the time.

While there're many ballpark rules of thumb, none of them is a substitute for nor more accurate than actually measuring temperature.

The idea there's any special cred in doing things by feel rather than procedure & measurement is nonsense. Quite the opposite is the case. Restaurant chefs know this. They know that measuring temperature for steak doneness means fewer returned dishes or recooks and a confirmed perfectly-done dish. They know measuring portions when cooking & plating means every dish comes out the same, which means that customers get consistency and the business gets reliable use & order metrics.

I'm not even getting into baking, where going by feel ala une artiste is often a good way to waste ingredients on a crap result you have to toss because it's near-inedible.


When you throw 30-40 steaks on the grill at the same time when dinner rush starts, you aint using a thermometer, you use your knowledge and skill. I'm not saying we dont use em, just not all the time
 
2021-02-27 2:36:55 PM  
Behold: The Ghetto Grill

1960's Hibachi stuck on the remains of a 1960's typewriter stand. Finally rusted out and was retired.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-02-27 2:48:25 PM  

Dr.Fey: I did.  Very early on in my cooking 'career,' I slathered a steak heavily in a creamy salad dressing marinade and cooked it in the oven.

Eureka!  I had discovered a new method for creating durable shoe leather, albeit one that is cost prohibitive from replacing the industry standard means.


When I was young there were steaks on a great sale and all I had was a pan to cook them in.  It wasn't that bad, especially for the price.  But not the best way to cook a steak.
 
2021-02-27 2:49:04 PM  

NINEv2: The_Sponge: One of my favorite steak seasonings:

[Fark user image image 389x750]

That stuff is f*cking amazing on chicken.


Ooooh...I should definitely do that.  Thanks!

/Assembled my new grill this morning.
 
2021-02-27 2:52:20 PM  

eviljimbo: GregInIndy: eviljimbo: LOL meat thermometer

Why?

Professional cooks in professional kitchens use meat thermometers constantly. They will always have one in their breast pocket and they will use it all of the time.

While there're many ballpark rules of thumb, none of them is a substitute for nor more accurate than actually measuring temperature.

The idea there's any special cred in doing things by feel rather than procedure & measurement is nonsense. Quite the opposite is the case. Restaurant chefs know this. They know that measuring temperature for steak doneness means fewer returned dishes or recooks and a confirmed perfectly-done dish. They know measuring portions when cooking & plating means every dish comes out the same, which means that customers get consistency and the business gets reliable use & order metrics.

I'm not even getting into baking, where going by feel ala une artiste is often a good way to waste ingredients on a crap result you have to toss because it's near-inedible.

When you throw 30-40 steaks on the grill at the same time when dinner rush starts, you aint using a thermometer, you use your knowledge and skill. I'm not saying we dont use em, just not all the time


Got myself into some shiat with my manager once that way. We'd start the afternoon shift at Qdoba by doing 2 grills full of chicken, one of steak, and then another chicken. About 36 pieces of meat per batch. Over the course of a few days my steak batches would get rarer and rarer (some were held in the warmer before hitting the line. Carryover and all). Not raw, but on the redder side of medium rare. Probably should've used a thermometer.
 
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