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(Omaha World Herald)   Man jumps bail, so friends that put up $5,000 bail beat him up and deliver him wrapped in duct tape   ( omaha.com) divider line
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29315 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Sep 2004 at 11:41 AM (13 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

104 Comments     (+0 »)

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2004-09-10 02:25:03 AM  
Oh, now this is Farkworthy.
Do greenlight this one.
2004-09-10 02:38:17 AM  
What a tangled web we weave.
2004-09-10 03:01:07 AM  
Why the hell were the people that brought him in charged with aiding a fugitive? I'll give the police that assault charges would be prudent, but how do you consider turning him into the police "aid"?
2004-09-10 03:07:32 AM  
i second Nanookanano. this is just awesome
2004-09-10 08:14:37 AM  
Funny. Would have been funnier if they hadn't beaten him first, but still funny.
2004-09-10 08:41:53 AM  
If someone lost me $5000.00 and I had a chance to beat them up a bit, I'm thinking I might be tempted..
2004-09-10 09:12:17 AM  
Okay, roughing him up some is fair game, but 'severely beaten' is a little extreme.

BTW, Shan is right.
2004-09-10 09:31:40 AM  
They say "false imprisonment" I say "citizen's arrest".

And for $5,000 I'd give someone a "severe" beating, too.
2004-09-10 09:49:08 AM  
I'm with JangoFett on this one. Asshole deserved it.
2004-09-10 10:55:30 AM  
Hahahahahahaha, that's awesome!
2004-09-10 11:44:36 AM  
Yeah, I mean, just say he tried to rob you and oyu kicked his arse.

And how is that aiding a criminal when you turn him in?

Man, between this and the baseball curfew thing, Cops are soooooo stupid!
2004-09-10 11:45:39 AM  
HAHAHAHHAHAH! o0OdubyaN3eEDd!11one!!!won!1
2004-09-10 11:46:50 AM  
That's awesome. I'd also be inclined to beat the crap out of someone who caused me to lose 5000 bucks.
2004-09-10 11:47:34 AM  
Yea I dont get the false imprisonment either. Let this be a lesson next time you beat someone who jumps bail. Drop their ductaped ass infront of the police station and get the fark out of there.
2004-09-10 11:48:38 AM  
"You might say it was vigilante justice, but this isn't the proper way to handle anything."

Would she have been in trouble if she just wrapped him in the tape?
2004-09-10 11:49:25 AM  
Never happened b4, huh...how SHOULD they have gone after someone who basically had them throw away 5k? Take him to court?
Said he was treated at hospital and released. Did not say he had to stay even overnight. So I doubt he was severly beaten.
Anyhoo...I wonder who will post HER bail now??
2004-09-10 11:49:40 AM  
karma's a biatch
2004-09-10 11:49:55 AM  
Mike_Clown, Sounds like she still would have gotten in trouble for the false imprisonment and aiding and abetting. I should post this on www.realpolice.net but then again I'm to lazy to.
2004-09-10 11:49:58 AM  
Did they stick a broomstick up the guys cornhole? If not, they should have - in preparation for what he will get once he is in jail.
2004-09-10 11:50:43 AM  
I would have duct taped his arse to a pay phone and call the police.
2004-09-10 11:51:21 AM  
by the woman who originally posted his bail...

2004-09-10 11:52:11 AM  
Duct Tape... Is there nothing it can't do?
2004-09-10 11:53:51 AM  
WTF? Isn't that exactly what a bounty hunter, or fugitive recovery professional, or whatever they're called would do?!? I'd say he was roughed up resisting arrest, end of case. Give the woman her 5 large back and offer her a job!
2004-09-10 11:54:20 AM  
that'll learn em'
2004-09-10 11:54:41 AM  
The woman and an Omaha man were arrested on suspicion of false imprisonment,

... uh, yeah? Well, whatever ...

serious assault,

... got that right at least ...

and aiding and abetting a fugitive.

... W ... T ... F?

/yeah, right. I aid and abeattup on my friends all the time.
2004-09-10 11:54:47 AM  
Umm.. Wait I'm confused.. So if you jump bail and a bail bondsmen beats the trash out of you and brings you back in cuffs it's ok. (See that Dog guy on tv) But if the women who's 5k you squandered does basicly the same thing with duct tape minus cuffs..it's illegal..?

Since she's the one that put the money up doesn't that like make her kinda like a bail bondsmen?

And WTF with the false imprisonment. I mean they were going to send him to JAIL where they would lock him up... so obviously he deserved to be imprisoned so how can it be false.. unlawful maybe false no.
2004-09-10 11:55:40 AM  
This kind of story is what fark is all about.
2004-09-10 11:55:57 AM  
I agree, she was a hero and I'm impressed that she showed restraint and let him live.
2004-09-10 11:56:10 AM  
Hey - if this were more common it might actually become a deterrent to future bail-jumpers.

2004-09-10 11:56:34 AM  
This just warms the cockles of your heart, doesn't it? Maybe the sub-cockle region.
2004-09-10 11:56:36 AM  
I get it now! Only cops are allowed to beat people up. For the rest of us, we're handling situations wrong.
2004-09-10 11:57:06 AM  
Hell, I say the guy got off easy. For making her basically lose $5,000, I say instead of using duct tape, she should have used a glue gun.
2004-09-10 11:57:19 AM  
TV's Fall Guy, Lee Majors unavailable for comment.

/no HTML skills
2004-09-10 11:57:51 AM  
[image from members.nuvox.net too old to be available]
2004-09-10 11:58:01 AM  
You want karate?
2004-09-10 11:59:26 AM  
Nelson Approves

[image from rob-clarkson.com too old to be available]

2004-09-10 11:59:46 AM  
2004-09-10 11:55:40 AM AcornMan

This kind of story is what fark is all about.

Amen. Someday, there will be a politics.fark.com where all the tightasses can jerk each other off around a nice warm political flamewar and leave the rest of us to enjoy stuff like this.
2004-09-10 12:00:30 PM  
Dog unavailable for comment

[image from image.guardian.co.uk too old to be available]
2004-09-10 12:01:34 PM  
Doesn't the problem come from the fact that bounty hunters have to get licensed ? (did not read the article).

Otherwise, I think that in most states, you cannot do a citizen unless your are witnessing him committing a crime.
2004-09-10 12:01:52 PM  
A friend of mine named Tony Dukes did this when we were out of high school...An acquantance of his stole his guns and knives (Items very very important to Tony). Anyway the thief skipped town, was gone for a few months and came back when the money from the items ran out. Tony found out the guy was back, tracked him to a house party..beat him on the head with a bottle, dragged him to his truck and tied him up. At the station Tony is all bloody and the cops were freaking out-COP "Are you alright, son??"
Tony "I'm fine, its not my blood. I have my prisoner in the car."
COP "Prisoner??"
Clink, slam, jail time for both of them and the both got the same fine.
BUT, he did get to kick the hell out of the guy for awhile.

/last I heard Tony was booted out of the Green Berets and is doing time for vehicular manslaughter. But that was 12-14 years ago.
2004-09-10 12:02:40 PM  
"You might say it was vigilante justice, but this isn't the proper way to handle anything."

Yes, yes it is.
2004-09-10 12:02:41 PM  
Beutiful. She shouldnt be locked up for it though.
2004-09-10 12:03:30 PM  
"First law of the Universe, kid: you can never have too much duct tape."
2004-09-10 12:03:35 PM  
The woman and an Omaha man were arrested on suspicion of false imprisonment, serious assault, and aiding and abetting a fugitive.

Aiding and Abetting??!!! jesus christ I hate the police, how the hell was that aiding and abetting?
2004-09-10 12:03:35 PM  
Otherwise, I think that in most states, you cannot do a citizen unless your are witnessing him committing a crime.

Actually, in most states sodomy is illegal. And if he was committing a crime, do you really think he'd be in the mood?

(Typos are fun!)
2004-09-10 12:03:52 PM  
Could have been worse.

[image from ropeofsilicon.com too old to be available]
"So why do you want me to climb in this trunk?"

/jackie brown
2004-09-10 12:04:57 PM  
"The man was treated a hospital and returned to the jail."

2004-09-10 12:08:23 PM  
hahaha, I was going to comment on that line, too.

The man was treated a hospital and returned to the jail.

He gets his ass kicked and duct taped and put in jail, and then they give him a hospital as a treat? meh.
2004-09-10 12:08:34 PM  
[image from octanecreative.com too old to be available]
2004-09-10 12:09:48 PM  
I have to agree the aiding and abetting charge is one of the silliest things I've ever heard.

If I were the judge I'd fine her a dollar, tell her not to do it again and send her on her way.
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