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(Slate)   "So, I hooked up with my girlfriend's mom and now I'm worried things are going to get weird. What can I do to salvage things with my girlfriend?"   (slate.com) divider line
    More: Awkward, Want, Shirt, Q. Cheating, friends' vindictiveness, son Andrew's mother, Q. Queer romance, done deal, own decision  
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756 clicks; posted to Discussion » on 26 Jan 2021 at 3:49 AM (5 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



49 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2021-01-25 11:58:14 PM  
Keep your f*cking mouth shut!
 
2021-01-26 12:03:10 AM  
The butt.
 
2021-01-26 2:32:30 AM  
Fark her mom.

Oh wait...

Ah.  Fark her dad!
 
2021-01-26 2:50:52 AM  
nypost.comView Full Size
 
2021-01-26 2:54:35 AM  
Dude ain't admitting.

He's bragging.
 
2021-01-26 2:55:40 AM  
Threesome time.

It works in all the documentary short films I've seen.
 
2021-01-26 3:14:29 AM  
If I had a nickel every time I imagined this happened to me, I might not be completely alone and terrified of what the future might bring.
 
2021-01-26 4:28:39 AM  

Dahnkster: [nypost.com image 618x410]


George Michael - Too Funky (12''Extended Mix)
Youtube nWh1P_AYcfM
 
2021-01-26 4:36:18 AM  
I suppose a three-way is out of the question...
 
2021-01-26 5:21:44 AM  
Dear PornHub,
 
2021-01-26 5:31:53 AM  
I'm not just telling you, I'm telling everyone.
 
2021-01-26 5:43:30 AM  
Yet another fake letter, but the answer works.

There's no coming back from this one, your relationship is already ruined, break up with your girlfriend.
 
2021-01-26 5:51:18 AM  
Idontbelieveyou.jpg
 
2021-01-26 6:30:31 AM  
"There's no coming back from this one, "

It's remote, but not impossible

i.gifer.comView Full Size
 
2021-01-26 6:35:41 AM  
It was Cory Chase, wasn't it, rather than her real mom?
 
2021-01-26 6:37:52 AM  
Only fair for your gf to sleep with ur mom so you can call it even.
 
2021-01-26 6:57:38 AM  
 
2021-01-26 7:17:02 AM  
Wait for the granddaughter to turn 18, and go for the "time traveler trifecta"

Yes. It is a thing.
 
2021-01-26 7:17:23 AM  
Did she have it going on?
 
2021-01-26 7:20:44 AM  
Salvage? Is this guy mad?

He should tell both of them that he told both of them and sit back and watch this once-in-a-life opportunity for entertainment.
 
2021-01-26 7:33:42 AM  
I got some scotch.
Single malt?
Aged eighteen years. The way I like it.
So, ah, would you object if I said you were quite striking?
Mister Finch, are you trying to seduce me?
Yes ma'am, I am.
 
2021-01-26 7:34:59 AM  
Her mom was cheatin' too, so I don't see the prob.
Still...
pbs.twimg.comView Full Size
 
2021-01-26 7:56:32 AM  

EdwardTellerhands: Her mom was cheatin' too, so I don't see the prob.
Still...
[pbs.twimg.com image 426x224]


The problem is that the alleged cheating boyfriend thinks that he has a possibility of keeping the girlfriend.
 
2021-01-26 8:03:34 AM  

nmrsnr: EdwardTellerhands: Her mom was cheatin' too, so I don't see the prob.
Still...
[pbs.twimg.com image 426x224]

The problem is that the alleged cheating boyfriend thinks that he has a possibility of keeping the girlfriend.


[entering suspension-of-disbelief mode]
Why couldn't he? The GF doesn't know ("if I don't tell her now, the truth might come out eventually"), and Mom ain't gonna tell her she was lookin' for strange on Tinder.
 
2021-01-26 8:05:38 AM  

Farking Clown Shoes: Threesome time.

It works in all the documentary short films I've seen.


this.
 
2021-01-26 8:35:23 AM  
Now that I've read TFA...Everybody in this letter is horrible and would be fodder for "Days of Our Lives."

The letter on the failed adoption was interesting and very sad. I have a good friend who is an attorney and he has many, many stories like it. Even when it is obvious it is better for all parties involved, the maternal instinct wins out. The relatives and others have no standing in it (kind of like abortion), but they still want to control the narrative.
 
2021-01-26 9:13:49 AM  

some_beer_drinker: Farking Clown Shoes: Threesome time.

It works in all the documentary short films I've seen.

this.


No, it has to be a  stepdaughter.
 
2021-01-26 10:12:28 AM  
Q. Cheating with an added surprise:

If he plays his cards right, he could get to experience a M/D threesome.

/.Bow ckia wow wow
 
2021-01-26 10:29:37 AM  

nmrsnr: EdwardTellerhands: Her mom was cheatin' too, so I don't see the prob.
Still...
[pbs.twimg.com image 426x224]

The problem is that the alleged cheating boyfriend thinks that he has a possibility of keeping the girlfriend.


It's amazing to me how much better things would be if people followed two simple rules:

1.  Act like an adult.
2.  Don't be a dick to other people.
 
2021-01-26 10:34:03 AM  
Who do they have writing these letters? The same people that write the letters to Parade magazine?

"Dear Parade Magazine,
My wife and I bet dinner out on this so help me out! I am a big fan of Gal Gadot, but I haven't seen her in anything for a while. I say she is retired from acting. My wife insists that she still makes movies, please tell us she is wrong so I can get my favorite steak dinner!"

"Tell your wife to pick her favorite meal, you are mistaken!  Gal is currently starring in Wonder Woman 1984, in theaters and streaming on HBO Max and will be seen in the upcoming Death on the Nile! Enjoy your night out!"
 
2021-01-26 10:38:04 AM  

kbronsito: Only fair for your gf to sleep with ur mom so you can call it even.


Speaking of documentaries, I think I've seen that one.
 
2021-01-26 11:20:34 AM  
1) Tempted But The Truth Is Discovered.  What's Been Going On, Now That You Have Gone, There's Your Mother*: DTMFA, both of them.

2) I Am Not Throwin' Away My Shot: You didn't make the schedule.  You likely don't get to trade.  You didn't cause this.  Sister needs to GTHOI.

3) But The Kid Is Not My Son: Tell your family to STFU and MYOB.

4) Lesser Artists Borrow, Great Artists Steal: Burn the shirt and GTHOI.  Or find a way to send the creator some bills to compensate them.

5) You Can Get Anything You Want At Alice's Restaurant: Tell Alice to STFU and MYOB.

6) I'm Climbing Up, Up The Corporate Ladder.  Watch Out!  It's Dog Eat Dog: Prudie makes a good point about the context of your BF and his boasting.  Huge difference between I've worked hard and earned this vs. god's gift to his industry.  But mostly his success does not diminish you.  Two things, if he's truly an unrepentant braggart, DTMFA.  If he's just very proud of his work, GTHOI.

7) We Don't Have The Time For Psychological Romance: In a non-pandemic circumstance, setting up a home-cooked but still indulgent, fancy meal for two would be a great place to start.  But that's basically every meal right now, just with added candles and fancier food.  The activities you could do are also greatly limited.  I would at least start with taking on a regular task they find annoying so they don't have to.

8) Billie Jean II: That's a polite way to tell them to STFU.  Not sure there's a need to be polite.

9) Great Artists Steal II: You know, I skipped Prudie's reply when I wrote mine.  Yes it is theft.  Shocked Prudie didn't call them on it.

10) Word Up II: Yes, trial and error are going to be part of this.  The idea is to both surprise and delight, so one must also accept that getting it wrong is possible, but one would hope the effort would be recognized and appreciated.

11) She'd Have The Card To Bring Me Down If She Played It Right (Classic): Not being forthcoming about this would be a dealbreaker for me.  I say DTMFA.


* I have been waiting for the right letter to use that lyrical change for that Squeeze song.  Finally happened!
 
2021-01-26 11:44:14 AM  

buntz: Who do they have writing these letters? The same people that write the letters to Parade magazine?

"Dear Parade Magazine,
My wife and I bet dinner out on this so help me out! I am a big fan of Gal Gadot, but I haven't seen her in anything for a while. I say she is retired from acting. My wife insists that she still makes movies, please tell us she is wrong so I can get my favorite steak dinner!"

"Tell your wife to pick her favorite meal, you are mistaken!  Gal is currently starring in Wonder Woman 1984, in theaters and streaming on HBO Max and will be seen in the upcoming Death on the Nile! Enjoy your night out!"


They are the same, in that neither are real.
 
2021-01-26 12:32:39 PM  
There are movies about this that have happy endings for all parties involved.
 
2021-01-26 12:35:43 PM  

Nidiot: Yet another fake letter, but the answer works.

There's no coming back from this one, your relationship is already ruined, break up with your girlfriend.


Well one can do the even better version of 8 seconds , where you whisper in her ear "your mother was better" and hold on for dear life
 
2021-01-26 12:40:01 PM  
Look... you're all consenting adults. Time to sit down and have a frank talk with everyone involved. A clever man could turn this into a an on-going threesome.
 
2021-01-26 12:45:31 PM  

physt: Look... you're all consenting adults. Time to sit down and have a frank talk with everyone involved. A clever man could turn this into a an on-going threesome.


Or at least rotating shifts.
 
2021-01-26 12:46:53 PM  

buntz: Who do they have writing these letters? The same people that write the letters to Parade magazine?

"Dear Parade Magazine,
My wife and I bet dinner out on this so help me out! I am a big fan of Gal Gadot, but I haven't seen her in anything for a while. I say she is retired from acting. My wife insists that she still makes movies, please tell us she is wrong so I can get my favorite steak dinner!"

"Tell your wife to pick her favorite meal, you are mistaken!  Gal is currently starring in Wonder Woman 1984, in theaters and streaming on HBO Max and will be seen in the upcoming Death on the Nile! Enjoy your night out!"


Fark user imageView Full Size


/Oblig
 
2021-01-26 12:56:57 PM  
article: ' (the woman he'd just had sex with) showed me a picture of her daughter. To my surprise, her daughter was my girlfriend, the one I was cheating on'

Well, geez, he'd thought she looked familiar...
 
2021-01-26 1:41:37 PM  
cdn.shopify.comView Full Size

you lost a GF but gained a fun story.
 
2021-01-26 2:56:04 PM  
What if the mom is actually closer to your age than her daughter?
i.imgur.comView Full Size
 
2021-01-26 3:15:40 PM  

Raug the Dwarf: physt: Look... you're all consenting adults. Time to sit down and have a frank talk with everyone involved. A clever man could turn this into a an on-going threesome.

Or at least rotating shifts.


As someone who successfully had a rotating situation with 3 women, I can truly say that was the only time in my life that I got enough sex.
 
2021-01-26 4:28:56 PM  
I recently learned that this happened with my cousin & aunt.  Cousin's boyfriend was shagging her mom on the side.  Then boyfriend got in a bad car wreck and eventually woke up just this side of vegetable and with no filters.  Fun times reportedly ensued - I was to young to hear of it at the time.

/ Pennsyltucky
 
2021-01-26 7:46:08 PM  
Right... "accidentally." Like he tripped and fell into her?
 
2021-01-26 7:49:17 PM  
This is not a time to develop a conscience. fark them both and always keep a bug out bag at the ready because it's all going to come crashing down and you're going to have to skip town.

I mean, otherwise you wouldn't have gotten into this mess to start with.
 
2021-01-26 7:56:12 PM  
Bang girlfriend and be sure to have the mom "accidental" barge in, and offer sex tips, for an instant threesome

At least that is what i have seen in the many educational videos i have watched
 
2021-01-26 8:34:09 PM  

vudukungfu: Wait for the granddaughter to turn 18, and go for the "time traveler trifecta"

Yes. It is a thing.


Alternately, see if the girlfriend's maternal grandmother is 1) still alive, and 2) hot.
 
2021-01-27 12:25:43 AM  

Fishbulb30w: This almost happened to me twice but first it was with the girlfriends mom and the second time with the girlfriends daughter.

1rst
I'd broken up with my high school girlfriend after we'd lived together for 3 years. I was devastated and my brother took me in to his place and got me a job as a dishwasher at the restaurant he worked at.
It went fairly well and we had some good times but after about 8 months he got  sick of my moping and told me I had to get my own place.

I moved into a new place, an old house broken up into 6 apartments, 3 on the first floor, 2 on the second, and 1 one on the third.
Every morning I'd see this hot blond leaving the building at about 8:20 usually with some books so I assumed she was going to the University about a mile up the road.
Finally after about a month I ran into her at the same time we got home and she was gorgeous. I had to have her.

Six weeks or so later we both happened to get home at the same time on a Saturday night about 1:30am and me having a few drinks in me started to talk to her and we started walking up the stairs together and when we got to my door on the 2nd I said well this is me, nice to finally meet you. Would you like to come in for a drink?
She says yes.

We go into my place and she sits down on the couch looking around and I grab a couple of beer out of the fridge and sit down beside her.
I don't know if we even touch the drinks and we just started making out. I take her hand and take her into my bedroom we continue kissing and I just start going down on her and stayed there until success and started kissing my way up her body and when I got to her lips my penis just new where to go and it just slipped right into her.
She let out this slight gasp and I looked at her and she had these wide eyes and I stopped and asked her if she wanted me to stop?
She shook her head so I kept going and while I had fun something just wasn't right.
We did it again about an hour later and then about 5am said she had to go home.
...


Read my post and then my drunken mind did it in my grandfather's Scottish accent or my grand mom's Irish accent and it was a lot time funnier.
Olden Thyme's
 
2021-01-27 3:13:12 AM  

dittybopper: nmrsnr: EdwardTellerhands: Her mom was cheatin' too, so I don't see the prob.
Still...
[pbs.twimg.com image 426x224]

The problem is that the alleged cheating boyfriend thinks that he has a possibility of keeping the girlfriend.

It's amazing to me how much better things would be if people followed two simple rules:

1.  Act like an adult.
2.  Don't be a dick to other people.


3. Don't be unattractive.
 
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