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(Slate)   "My family is all about meat and carbs. I've been forcing them to start eating more vegetables that aren't potatoes, and I've been accused of being selfish. Am I?"   (slate.com) divider line
    More: Awkward, Eating, Mother, Food, child-free people, general sense, traditional sense, home-mom, volunteer tutor  
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394 clicks; posted to Discussion » on 23 Jan 2021 at 6:20 AM (16 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



Voting Results (Smartest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

 
2021-01-23 1:41:53 AM  
18 votes:
My ex fiance hated veggies so much that he would literally pick off the peas and carrots from fried rice before eating them. At 25, he was overweight, balding, and a prissy whiny brat when I tried to get him to expand his diet.

I dodged a bullet there.
 
2021-01-23 1:02:16 AM  
12 votes:
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-01-23 12:37:04 AM  
12 votes:
Potatoes are farking awesome

Thats all
 
2021-01-23 4:10:55 AM  
11 votes:
My mother came from the boil-the-shiat-out-of-it school of vegetable preparation and growing up I was quite a fussy eater. They tasted bitter to me and had an unpleasant, slimy texture. It took me a while for me to learn how to prepare and season vegetables to my taste when I got a little older.
 
2021-01-23 11:52:23 AM  
8 votes:

cryinoutloud: montreal_medic: Really? In the division of Labour at our house, my "jobs" include grocery shopping, cooking, and cleanup of the kitchen afterwards. My wife doesn't enjoy those, and I don't mind (the cooking part, I love). She does laundry and vacuuming and probably 2/3 of the cleaning. There are lots of other "jobs" for each of us, but we aren't keeping score - there are just some that by now we know to leave to the other.
Never noticed a major difference in men vs. women at the grocery store

That's nice, that you all can do that without devolving into some gender war bullshiat.

Just to be an asshole, I'm going to inform you that about 85% of our clientele at the convenience store is MALE. Smokes, junk food, energy drinks (they need them, the shape they're in), and coffee. Half those guys wouldn't make it to work every day if we weren't there. The women who aren't fat come in and buy their diet fountain drinks. The women who are fat bring their kids with them and get them some candy that is shaped like food, but is sugar.

Yes, it's that lopsided. And I doubt that women would have come up with the idea to make a store that serves up nothing but addictive and short-term gratification fixes. We just don't think like that. We think more in the long term, not just "taking care of business" for another 24 hours.

It's true. Men led us right down addiction alley. Fast fixes and never worry about the future.
Hey guys--it's not working. How about you grow up and start taking care of things?
But only if you have a STEAK beforehand. You NEED things.


I have no problem believing that your observations and experiences are real. But there is no way in hell that they apply to the experience of most people in most places and definitely not to entire genders at large.

I don't know where you live, but it sounds like a pretty crappy situation and I'm really sorry to hear it
 
2021-01-23 8:34:34 AM  
8 votes:
I grew up in a meat and potatoes is love household.  Canned mush veggies were added as an afterthought.  I was super active as a kid, so there was no danger of getting fat.

As a single dad, I did much the same when cooking for my kids, but I used frozen veg. at a minimum and fresh veg, in season, when I could afford it.  My kids only whined about peas.  Most of our veggies were obtained from big fresh salads (non-iceberg.)  Meals were a happy time, and I didn't force them to eat anything, ever.  But they ate most everything.  My kids were fairly active as well.

When I got old, and inactive and fat, my mostly meat and potatoes diet ceased to work for me.  I just changed the proportions.  Half the plate veg, and much smaller servings of meat/starch.  That generally worked, but was boring.  My adult daughter served me some highly tasty, highly veggie based meals with little or no meat, and they were amazingly good.  Hot spiced chicken/all the veggies pad thai served over spaghetti squash is in the rotation now, and I look forward to it.

Whatever you serve, food is love, and if you can make dinner time a happy time, your family will eat most anything.
 
2021-01-23 12:53:00 AM  
8 votes:
Division of responsibility. You make a healthy meal and provide at least one option they will eat. They get to choose what to eat or not eat. That's it.
You should make their favorites sometimes, but this doesn't mean you have to cater to their palates every day.
 
2021-01-23 7:38:47 AM  
7 votes:
God help the family that considers potatoes a vegetable.
 
2021-01-23 1:14:44 AM  
7 votes:
I'm sure they'll be much happier when they have to test their glucose levels several times a day
 
2021-01-23 11:35:25 AM  
6 votes:

cryinoutloud: montreal_medic: Really? In the division of Labour at our house, my "jobs" include grocery shopping, cooking, and cleanup of the kitchen afterwards. My wife doesn't enjoy those, and I don't mind (the cooking part, I love). She does laundry and vacuuming and probably 2/3 of the cleaning. There are lots of other "jobs" for each of us, but we aren't keeping score - there are just some that by now we know to leave to the other.
Never noticed a major difference in men vs. women at the grocery store

That's nice, that you all can do that without devolving into some gender war bullshiat.

Just to be an asshole, I'm going to inform you that about 85% of our clientele at the convenience store is MALE. Smokes, junk food, energy drinks (they need them, the shape they're in), and coffee. Half those guys wouldn't make it to work every day if we weren't there. The women who aren't fat come in and buy their diet fountain drinks. The women who are fat bring their kids with them and get them some candy that is shaped like food, but is sugar.

Yes, it's that lopsided. And I doubt that women would have come up with the idea to make a store that serves up nothing but addictive and short-term gratification fixes. We just don't think like that. We think more in the long term, not just "taking care of business" for another 24 hours.

It's true. Men led us right down addiction alley. Fast fixes and never worry about the future.
Hey guys--it's not working. How about you grow up and start taking care of things?
But only if you have a STEAK beforehand. You NEED things.


Oh Wow. Your bullshiat is evolving.

/a woman has never bought anything for instant gratification
//NEVER
 
2021-01-23 9:07:07 AM  
6 votes:

Frederick: If you are doing the cooking -- and lets be honest, the grocery shopping too* -- then no; you arent being selfish. You are, however, spineless.

*the only dads I ever see at the grocery store are single dads


Really? In the division of Labour at our house, my "jobs" include grocery shopping, cooking, and cleanup of the kitchen afterwards. My wife doesn't enjoy those, and I don't mind (the cooking part, I love). She does laundry and vacuuming and probably 2/3 of the cleaning.  There are lots of other "jobs" for each of us, but we aren't keeping score - there are just some that by now we know to leave to the other.

Never noticed a major difference in men vs. women at the grocery store
 
2021-01-23 8:48:49 PM  
5 votes:

Frederick: If you are doing the cooking -- and lets be honest, the grocery shopping too* -- then no; you arent being selfish. You are, however, spineless.

*the only dads I ever see at the grocery store are single dads


Um... I have a wife and 4 kids. I do the grocery shopping because I also run the kitchen. And yeah, while I take my family's preferences into account for my meal planning, I have also make a point of never making "backups". If someone doesn't want to eat the dinner I made they're capable of making their own damn sandwich.
 
2021-01-23 8:05:54 AM  
5 votes:

thisispete: My mother came from the boil-the-shiat-out-of-it school of vegetable preparation and growing up I was quite a fussy eater. They tasted bitter to me and had an unpleasant, slimy texture. It took me a while for me to learn how to prepare and season vegetables to my taste when I got a little older.


My mom cooked the crap out of veggies, too.  She made up for it by adding a couple tablespoons of bacon grease to the pot to make it tasty.

That sounds so gross to me as an adult.
 
2021-01-23 8:05:16 AM  
5 votes:

thisispete: My mother came from the boil-the-shiat-out-of-it school of vegetable preparation and growing up I was quite a fussy eater. They tasted bitter to me and had an unpleasant, slimy texture. It took me a while for me to learn how to prepare and season vegetables to my taste when I got a little older.


Thisisalsopete... Similar situation (English parents, boil it until it's mush), but I came to find out later that I'm on the 'supertaster' end of the spectrum and what most people can handle as 'nice, but bitter' (coffee, many greens, etc.) is nearly impossible for me to get down. It was a constant battle with my parents. A few years ago my Dad sent me an email asking if I'd ever heard of 'supertasters' and coming very close to apologizing. He said something to the effect of "I didn't realize you were tasting in technicolor and we were tasting in b&w".  As a funny aside, my dad is basically a non-taster, years of working in chemical factories, refineries, etc., have left him with nearly no sense smell, which apparently is a huge part of how we actually taste things.
 
2021-01-23 1:34:09 AM  
5 votes:
I assume you mean non-starchy carbs. Unless you are a big fan of mushrooms.
Meat and starch are delicious, smothered in fatty gravy.  Your steamed broccoli are up against stiff competition.
 
2021-01-23 12:38:28 AM  
5 votes:
You can make veggies interesting without going to great lengths. I've yet to see a meat and potatoes fan turn their nose up at some green beans with almond slices. Granted, there are some people who are just plain fussy, like a kid who interned with my team that would only ever order a milkshake and fries when we went out for group lunch on the company dime. If someone is over 21 and still insists on ordering from the kiddie menu they likely have some larger issues (failure to thrive) at play.
 
2021-01-23 12:31:50 AM  
4 votes:
This didn't happen out of the blue. It's a problem you created and grew for years.
 
2021-01-23 12:23:04 AM  
4 votes:
If you are doing the cooking -- and lets be honest, the grocery shopping too* -- then no; you arent being selfish. You are, however, spineless.

*the only dads I ever see at the grocery store are single dads
 
2021-01-23 9:04:04 PM  
3 votes:

eyeq360: bughunter: KimHoppes: Although I thankfully never had a problem with getting my kids to eat veggies, I have encountered it with others who have come to stay with us over the years.

I have shredded veggies into meatloaf, lasagna, pasta sauce, etc.  (Carrots, broccoli, cauliflower, eggplant, zucchini, etc.)  It also makes use of that "one carrot and one part of a head of broccoli" left in the fridge bit.  Or the broccoli stems that get cut off and usually tossed in the compost bucket.

Works with picky eaters, most texture issue eaters, etc in my experience.

YMMV

[beingamomisgreat.files.wordpress.com image 423x503]

/jewish mom sneaks spinach into kids' brownies
//wrong plant, Jess!

Some of the stuff the "sneak vegetables in food" camp write is bullshiat rhetorical stuff. Like "If people don't notice kale in their smoothies, you can sneak kale in chocolate chip cookies" and the cookies look like this:
[chocolatecoveredkatie.com image 730x1016]
[s3.amazonaws.com image 850x566]
Yeah, like they're not going to notice the f*cking GREEN kale in their cookies that shouldn't have green in them.


Monkey: Frederick: If you are doing the cooking -- and lets be honest, the grocery shopping too* -- then no; you arent being selfish. You are, however, spineless.

*the only dads I ever see at the grocery store are single dads

I don't think my wife has set foot in a grocery store in several years - that's my job as husband, and was my dad's, too. Also cooking, although she usually makes dinner once a week, and the kids once a week.


My dad and Uncle Tom have been in the restaurant industry since I was born. I learned how to take apart a side of beef, and turn parts of it into chili grind, steaks, and ground beef. My younger brothers, Ben, Jeremy, and Matt are all good cooks- at Thanksgiving and Christmas (except for this Covid-19 year, boo!) we send our wives and girlfriends to watch football and provide them with snacks and beer and wine, and say, keep the F*** out of the kitchen unless y'all need ice. Then we all cook, and insult one another's culinary techniques, and try not to cut one another.
 
2021-01-23 2:21:23 PM  
3 votes:

eyeq360: bughunter: KimHoppes: Although I thankfully never had a problem with getting my kids to eat veggies, I have encountered it with others who have come to stay with us over the years.

I have shredded veggies into meatloaf, lasagna, pasta sauce, etc.  (Carrots, broccoli, cauliflower, eggplant, zucchini, etc.)  It also makes use of that "one carrot and one part of a head of broccoli" left in the fridge bit.  Or the broccoli stems that get cut off and usually tossed in the compost bucket.

Works with picky eaters, most texture issue eaters, etc in my experience.

YMMV

[beingamomisgreat.files.wordpress.com image 423x503]

/jewish mom sneaks spinach into kids' brownies
//wrong plant, Jess!

Some of the stuff the "sneak vegetables in food" camp write is bullshiat rhetorical stuff. Like "If people don't notice kale in their smoothies, you can sneak kale in chocolate chip cookies" and the cookies look like this:
[chocolatecoveredkatie.com image 730x1016]
[s3.amazonaws.com image 850x566]
Yeah, like they're not going to notice the f*cking GREEN kale in their cookies that shouldn't have green in them.


Massive eye twitch!

Kale in cookies and brownies?  NO!  Kale belongs in salad or a delicious soup with mustard, collards, chorizo, etc.  NOT sweets.
Also, never heard of that book.  Should be sent to the same shelf as the books of alien looking food from the 50s and looked upon with the same bizarre horrifying curiosity.
 
2021-01-23 8:51:43 AM  
3 votes:

Ker_Thwap: I grew up in a meat and potatoes is love household.  Canned mush veggies were added as an afterthought.  I was super active as a kid, so there was no danger of getting fat.

As a single dad, I did much the same when cooking for my kids, but I used frozen veg. at a minimum and fresh veg, in season, when I could afford it.  My kids only whined about peas.  Most of our veggies were obtained from big fresh salads (non-iceberg.)  Meals were a happy time, and I didn't force them to eat anything, ever.  But they ate most everything.  My kids were fairly active as well.

When I got old, and inactive and fat, my mostly meat and potatoes diet ceased to work for me.  I just changed the proportions.  Half the plate veg, and much smaller servings of meat/starch.  That generally worked, but was boring.  My adult daughter served me some highly tasty, highly veggie based meals with little or no meat, and they were amazingly good.  Hot spiced chicken/all the veggies pad thai served over spaghetti squash is in the rotation now, and I look forward to it.

Whatever you serve, food is love, and if you can make dinner time a happy time, your family will eat most anything.


After a couple of generations of people being raised of meat/potato or meals-in-a-box, must of us just don't know how to cook good veg-heavy meals. The selection at a typical American grocery store also leaves a lot to be desired. Three kinds of mushrooms, one kind of green bean, two kinds of cabbage? Not enough variety to keep things interesting.

My wife and I have been using a lot of recipes from NHK lately. Dining With The Chef has some good ones that we can source ingredients for.
 
2021-01-23 7:42:24 AM  
3 votes:

thisispete: It took me a while for me to learn how to prepare and season vegetables to my taste when I got a little older.


Yup, when I learned how to cook and spice vegetables, it was though I had entered a whole, new, secret world. And the difference between fresh and canned or frozen.
 
2021-01-23 2:05:27 AM  
3 votes:
Kinda selfish trying to keep her spouse from killing himself with meat and carbs, if that's what he wants to do.

Trying to force health and wellbeing on her son is more of an ethical obligation.
 
2021-01-23 7:05:31 AM  
2 votes:

bostonguy: fragMasterFlash: only ever order a milkshake and fries when we went out for group lunch on the company dime

I know this isn't the reason, but I've known people who are intentionally very cheap in those situations because they don't want to appear to cost the company that much money.


Folks may find this hard to believe but when I was with Wells Fargo it was written in the employee handbook that on business lunches the employee could have two beers or one alcoholic mix drinks; although the supervisor would often set a dollar limit on the order. So most people would order a side and get the beer.

/this was 20 years ago
 
2021-01-23 5:28:34 AM  
2 votes:

thisispete: My mother came from the boil-the-shiat-out-of-it school of vegetable preparation and growing up I was quite a fussy eater. They tasted bitter to me and had an unpleasant, slimy texture.


Pretty much the same for me. I learned to eat many veges raw. Our dogs and I share raw carrots every meal.
 
2021-01-23 5:51:51 PM  
1 vote:

montreal_medic: Frederick: If you are doing the cooking -- and lets be honest, the grocery shopping too* -- then no; you arent being selfish. You are, however, spineless.

*the only dads I ever see at the grocery store are single dads

Really? In the division of Labour at our house, my "jobs" include grocery shopping, cooking, and cleanup of the kitchen afterwards. My wife doesn't enjoy those, and I don't mind (the cooking part, I love). She does laundry and vacuuming and probably 2/3 of the cleaning.  There are lots of other "jobs" for each of us, but we aren't keeping score - there are just some that by now we know to leave to the other.

Never noticed a major difference in men vs. women at the grocery store


I just love it when married couples argue over household duties.  Oh, no, I have to shove pieces of fabric into a water tub that cleans them for me.  biatch, please, I have to clean and maintain an entire house by myself.  Guess who helps me lug in two weeks' worth of those groceries you hate to shop for.  Oh, that's right.  Farking nobody.
 
2021-01-23 4:02:29 PM  
1 vote:

syrynxx: Oh god kale is horiible and bitter. Kale salad is horrible and bitter. I eat it only in banana smoothies which offset the bitterness.


The best solution I've found, courtesy of my ex: throw some into a lasagna. You can't taste it at all.
 
2021-01-23 2:30:41 PM  
1 vote:

Frederick: If you are doing the cooking -- and lets be honest, the grocery shopping too* -- then no; you arent being selfish. You are, however, spineless.

*the only dads I ever see at the grocery store are single dads


I don't think my wife has set foot in a grocery store in several years - that's my job as husband, and was my dad's, too. Also cooking, although she usually makes dinner once a week, and the kids once a week.
 
2021-01-23 2:14:33 PM  
1 vote:

bughunter: KimHoppes: Although I thankfully never had a problem with getting my kids to eat veggies, I have encountered it with others who have come to stay with us over the years.

I have shredded veggies into meatloaf, lasagna, pasta sauce, etc.  (Carrots, broccoli, cauliflower, eggplant, zucchini, etc.)  It also makes use of that "one carrot and one part of a head of broccoli" left in the fridge bit.  Or the broccoli stems that get cut off and usually tossed in the compost bucket.

Works with picky eaters, most texture issue eaters, etc in my experience.

YMMV

[beingamomisgreat.files.wordpress.com image 423x503]

/jewish mom sneaks spinach into kids' brownies
//wrong plant, Jess!


Some of the stuff the "sneak vegetables in food" camp write is bullshiat rhetorical stuff. Like "If people don't notice kale in their smoothies, you can sneak kale in chocolate chip cookies" and the cookies look like this:
chocolatecoveredkatie.comView Full Size

s3.amazonaws.comView Full Size

Yeah, like they're not going to notice the f*cking GREEN kale in their cookies that shouldn't have green in them.
 
2021-01-23 10:21:25 AM  
1 vote:

Mojongo: [Fark user image 377x377]


Last time I tried gardening, I ended up with $88/lb tomatoes.
 
2021-01-23 9:34:38 AM  
1 vote:
Well, at the very least start including a good daily multivitamin with dinner. Not as good as the vegis, but can't hurt.
 
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