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8746 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 Jan 2021 at 6:50 PM (6 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



117 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


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2021-01-21 4:35:56 PM  
You're 18, right?
 
2021-01-21 6:22:22 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-01-21 6:53:25 PM  
y helo thar.
 
2021-01-21 6:53:42 PM  

Al Roker's Forecast: You're 18, right?


Its not a necessary.


There is no federal law regarding child marriage. Every state sets its own requirements.

More than 1,000 15-year-olds have been married in Missouri since 1999. Even children ages 14, 13 and 12 can marry in Missouri - it's one of 25 states with no minimum age requirement. For those 14 and younger, a judge's consent is required.


/and we say that ISIS are degenerates
 
2021-01-21 6:53:51 PM  

Ginnungagap42: [Fark user image 340x255]


i.kym-cdn.comView Full Size
 
2021-01-21 6:54:23 PM  
Does my cat find you acceptable?
 
2021-01-21 6:56:37 PM  
26:  You're ok with me banging your step mom, right?
 
2021-01-21 6:57:06 PM  
"If you take something out of the microwave early, do you reset the timer when you're done or are you a rabid farking maniac?"
 
2021-01-21 6:57:51 PM  
Done in the headline.  No comments necessary.  Well done, Subby.
 
2021-01-21 6:58:38 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-01-21 7:01:01 PM  
26. What edition of D&D do you play?

27. Star Trek or Star Wars?

28. Ranch  or Blue Cheese with your wings?

#26 has multiple right answers but only one truly wrong answer.
#27 has no right or wrong answer, but follow up comments may be a deal breaker.
#28 has only one right answer. Sure, choosing ranch is not a deal breaker but it does count against you.

:-D
 
2021-01-21 7:01:44 PM  
Can we sign a contract for, like, 10 years, and revisit it once it's up?
 
2021-01-21 7:02:12 PM  
How many of your relatives are in jail or prison, and how many are substance abusers?
 
2021-01-21 7:03:17 PM  
If we get divorced when the children are in their teens, you get them.
 
2021-01-21 7:04:35 PM  

Mock26: 28. Ranch  or Blue Cheese with your wings?


Water, to dip the wings and rinse off the spice.
 
2021-01-21 7:06:09 PM  

Monkey: Can we sign a contract for, like, 10 years, and revisit it once it's up?


Must include performance clauses
 
2021-01-21 7:08:35 PM  

Mock26: 26. What edition of D&D do you play?

27. Star Trek or Star Wars?

28. Ranch  or Blue Cheese with your wings?

#26 has multiple right answers but only one truly wrong answer.
#27 has no right or wrong answer, but follow up comments may be a deal breaker.
#28 has only one right answer. Sure, choosing ranch is not a deal breaker but it does count against you.

:-D


Unless you are a hot chick, you will assuredly die alone.
 
2021-01-21 7:10:30 PM  

The Headless Horseman's Headless Horse: Mock26: 28. Ranch  or Blue Cheese with your wings?

Water, to dip the wings and rinse off the spice.


I thought that's what Ranch was for?

/I like to dip them in sriracha
 
2021-01-21 7:11:15 PM  
How soon can you pay off my credit card debt?
 
2021-01-21 7:12:42 PM  
Are you sure you wouldn't rather just have someone bludgeon you about the crotch and ass and take your money up front?
 
2021-01-21 7:13:31 PM  

Ginnungagap42: [Fark user image 340x255]


pbs.twimg.comView Full Size


/One of the last times I gis'd that image, me posting this image to Fark was in the results.
//I may have a problem.
 
2021-01-21 7:13:34 PM  
It's spelled buttsecks, subby. I really shouldn't have to explain this.
 
2021-01-21 7:17:46 PM  
Unfortunately for me, I see that "Are you a narcissistic sociopath?" isn't on the list...it should be though. ;)
 
2021-01-21 7:17:52 PM  
go through the family photo albums. listen carefully for stories of mental illness, disorders, abuse, alcoholism, degenerate gambling, imprisonment, patterns of alarming things like children dying young.

two days I spent with my Mom going through family photos were among the most disturbing days of my life. unfarkingbelievable.
 
2021-01-21 7:18:51 PM  

Jesus McSordid: Mock26: 26. What edition of D&D do you play?

27. Star Trek or Star Wars?

28. Ranch  or Blue Cheese with your wings?

#26 has multiple right answers but only one truly wrong answer.
#27 has no right or wrong answer, but follow up comments may be a deal breaker.
#28 has only one right answer. Sure, choosing ranch is not a deal breaker but it does count against you.

:-D

Unless you are a hot chick, you will assuredly die alone.


You can sell D&D as a great family game.
 
2021-01-21 7:20:18 PM  

Jesus McSordid: Mock26: 26. What edition of D&D do you play?

27. Star Trek or Star Wars?

28. Ranch  or Blue Cheese with your wings?

#26 has multiple right answers but only one truly wrong answer.
#27 has no right or wrong answer, but follow up comments may be a deal breaker.
#28 has only one right answer. Sure, choosing ranch is not a deal breaker but it does count against you.

:-D

Unless you are a hot chick, you will assuredly die alone.


nah, his mom will out live him.
 
2021-01-21 7:20:58 PM  

sinko swimo: go through the family photo albums. listen carefully for stories of mental illness, disorders, abuse, alcoholism, degenerate gambling, imprisonment, patterns of alarming things like children dying young.

two days I spent with my Mom going through family photos were among the most disturbing days of my life. unfarkingbelievable.


So having second thoughts about marrying her now?
 
2021-01-21 7:22:43 PM  

lolmao500: Al Roker's Forecast: You're 18, right?

Its not a necessary.


There is no federal law regarding child marriage. Every state sets its own requirements.

More than 1,000 15-year-olds have been married in Missouri since 1999. Even children ages 14, 13 and 12 can marry in Missouri - it's one of 25 states with no minimum age requirement. For those 14 and younger, a judge's consent is required.

/and we say that ISIS are degenerates


Osama, you done swimming?
 
2021-01-21 7:24:11 PM  
More that one wedding planned for last summer has been postponed indefinitely. The forming of babbies? Not so much.
 
2021-01-21 7:25:29 PM  
Do you ever get stuck in the dryer?
 
2021-01-21 7:25:50 PM  
"will you marry me?"
 
2021-01-21 7:27:11 PM  

anfrind: The Headless Horseman's Headless Horse: Mock26: 28. Ranch  or Blue Cheese with your wings?

Water, to dip the wings and rinse off the spice.

I thought that's what Ranch was for?

/I like to dip them in sriracha


No clue. I don't touch Ranch. Or bleu cheese.

...or Mayo, ketchup, mustard, any other salad dressing...

...basically no condiments.
 
2021-01-21 7:29:26 PM  

The Headless Horseman's Headless Horse: anfrind: The Headless Horseman's Headless Horse: Mock26: 28. Ranch  or Blue Cheese with your wings?

Water, to dip the wings and rinse off the spice.

I thought that's what Ranch was for?

/I like to dip them in sriracha

No clue. I don't touch Ranch. Or bleu cheese.

...or Mayo, ketchup, mustard, any other salad dressing...

...basically no condiments.


Philistine.
 
2021-01-21 7:29:50 PM  
pbs.twimg.comView Full Size
 
2021-01-21 7:30:33 PM  

omg bbq: Do you ever get stuck in the dryer?


golf clap
 
2021-01-21 7:32:04 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-01-21 7:32:40 PM  

The Headless Horseman's Headless Horse: anfrind: The Headless Horseman's Headless Horse: Mock26: 28. Ranch  or Blue Cheese with your wings?

Water, to dip the wings and rinse off the spice.

I thought that's what Ranch was for?

/I like to dip them in sriracha

No clue. I don't touch Ranch. Or bleu cheese.

...or Mayo, ketchup, mustard, any other salad dressing...

...basically no condiments.


We might be scarily similar.
 
2021-01-21 7:36:05 PM  

The Headless Horseman's Headless Horse: anfrind: The Headless Horseman's Headless Horse: Mock26: 28. Ranch  or Blue Cheese with your wings?

Water, to dip the wings and rinse off the spice.

I thought that's what Ranch was for?

/I like to dip them in sriracha

No clue. I don't touch Ranch. Or bleu cheese.

...or Mayo, ketchup, mustard, any other salad dressing...

...basically no condiments.


Can I ask how things ended up that way?
Were you raised condimentless or do none of them agree with your tastes?

..... or do you have some awful farking literature that you read and now you'll share with me about how all condiments cause cancer?
 
2021-01-21 7:38:07 PM  
i.pinimg.comView Full Size
 
2021-01-21 7:41:49 PM  
Didn't read the article. Is this about Uranus?
 
2021-01-21 7:42:55 PM  
Debt disclosure is pretty much everything.
 
2021-01-21 7:43:22 PM  

sinko swimo: go through the family photo albums. listen carefully for stories of mental illness, disorders, abuse, alcoholism, degenerate gambling, imprisonment, patterns of alarming things like children dying young.

two days I spent with my Mom going through family photos were among the most disturbing days of my life. unfarkingbelievable.


Luckily you made it out and are here on Fark with us normies.
 
2021-01-21 7:43:48 PM  

omg bbq: The Headless Horseman's Headless Horse: anfrind: The Headless Horseman's Headless Horse: Mock26: 28. Ranch  or Blue Cheese with your wings?

Water, to dip the wings and rinse off the spice.

I thought that's what Ranch was for?

/I like to dip them in sriracha

No clue. I don't touch Ranch. Or bleu cheese.

...or Mayo, ketchup, mustard, any other salad dressing...

...basically no condiments.

Can I ask how things ended up that way?
Were you raised condimentless or do none of them agree with your tastes?

..... or do you have some awful farking literature that you read and now you'll share with me about how all condiments cause cancer?


It might also be some snobbery about how food should taste like itself, as became popular among many European (especially French) elites as spices became more affordable to ordinary people.
 
2021-01-21 7:46:07 PM  

UltimaCS: "If you take something out of the microwave early, do you reset the timer when you're done or are you a rabid farking maniac?"



I thought it was "Do you take your food out of the microwave before the timer gets to zero, or are you a farking lunatic"?
 
2021-01-21 7:49:38 PM  

The Headless Horseman's Headless Horse: anfrind: The Headless Horseman's Headless Horse: Mock26: 28. Ranch  or Blue Cheese with your wings?

Water, to dip the wings and rinse off the spice.

I thought that's what Ranch was for?

/I like to dip them in sriracha

No clue. I don't touch Ranch. Or bleu cheese.

...or Mayo, ketchup, mustard, any other salad dressing...

...basically no condiments.


Is your name Jon Hein by chance?
 
2021-01-21 7:50:33 PM  

omg bbq: The Headless Horseman's Headless Horse: anfrind: The Headless Horseman's Headless Horse: Mock26: 28. Ranch  or Blue Cheese with your wings?

Water, to dip the wings and rinse off the spice.

I thought that's what Ranch was for?

/I like to dip them in sriracha

No clue. I don't touch Ranch. Or bleu cheese.

...or Mayo, ketchup, mustard, any other salad dressing...

...basically no condiments.

Can I ask how things ended up that way?
Were you raised condimentless or do none of them agree with your tastes?

..... or do you have some awful farking literature that you read and now you'll share with me about how all condiments cause cancer?


personally I find that food feels better in the mouth when not wrapped up with condiments.
 
2021-01-21 7:51:07 PM  

anfrind: omg bbq: The Headless Horseman's Headless Horse: anfrind: The Headless Horseman's Headless Horse: Mock26: 28. Ranch  or Blue Cheese with your wings?

Water, to dip the wings and rinse off the spice.

I thought that's what Ranch was for?

/I like to dip them in sriracha

No clue. I don't touch Ranch. Or bleu cheese.

...or Mayo, ketchup, mustard, any other salad dressing...

...basically no condiments.

Can I ask how things ended up that way?
Were you raised condimentless or do none of them agree with your tastes?

..... or do you have some awful farking literature that you read and now you'll share with me about how all condiments cause cancer?

It might also be some snobbery about how food should taste like itself, as became popular among many European (especially French) elites as spices became more affordable to ordinary people.


Sorry I was not clear. What I meant was how did THHHH find their no condiment lifestyle.

When I let myself go (or when I'm biking a lot and have an extra 1500-2000 calories to come up with somewhere each day) most foods are vehicles for ranch or ketchup.  I obsess over finding the best hotdogs and buns and then putting as many over the top things on them as possible.
Then again, any time I'm eating quality food I rarely use condiments.  Like I'll fight you before I put ketchup on a steak, though while at sea I've had steaks so bad that H57 was the only option.

Just got done with a fast little ride and now I'm hungry.  I'm also a little high.  Best conversation to have ever while in that combined state.
 
2021-01-21 7:54:23 PM  
http://extremeburgers.com/
Fark user imageView Full Size


These people are only 3 miles down the road from me so I have inspiration close at hand.
 
2021-01-21 7:56:06 PM  
Christ, reading these comments I'm positive everyone here has never been married or is divorced.
 
2021-01-21 8:01:40 PM  

Jesus McSordid: Mock26: 26. What edition of D&D do you play?

27. Star Trek or Star Wars?

28. Ranch  or Blue Cheese with your wings?

#26 has multiple right answers but only one truly wrong answer.
#27 has no right or wrong answer, but follow up comments may be a deal breaker.
#28 has only one right answer. Sure, choosing ranch is not a deal breaker but it does count against you.

:-D

Unless you are a hot chick, you will assuredly die alone.


Or you'll find your perfect match while giving a friend a ride to D&D sessions while talking about Star Wars and Star Trek.

/CSB
//Mrs. Wombat makes excellent hot wings too.
///With blue cheese and celery sticks on the side.
 
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