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(Fark)   What do you do for a living now vs what job have you always wanted to have? We're talking childhood dream jobs, crazy unrealistic fantasy jobs, or even jobs from the olden days of yore. Share with us your wildest professional aspirations   (fark.com) divider line
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59 clicks; posted to Discussion » on 18 Jan 2021 at 2:25 AM (6 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2021-01-17 11:14:32 PM  
Nuclear Physics in Sustainable Nuclear Fusion
 
2021-01-17 11:25:15 PM  
"A dam manager."
 
2021-01-17 11:27:45 PM  
In high school I wanted to work with lasers as a grown up. Graduated that and went to electronics engineering because that's what steers you to that. Yeah recession. Tech industries not hiring.  Ended up working in waste treatment for 20+ years. Didn't lose all my training since the industry was scaling up in some sort of automation during the time. Got tired of the shift work and got divorced so went back to electronics and networking/network construction. Ran across some engineers that had a strange problem with fiber optic cable and provided a solution  that the manufacturer deployed and solved the issue. Became a larger fish in a small stream. Went on to telecom engineering.

Oh well. I kinda ended up doing what I had wanted to do. Impressed some folk along the way. And unlike on Fark, haven't made a total ass of myself along the way in real life.
 
2021-01-17 11:44:24 PM  
If I could do anything, I think I'd work in a marijuana bakery. I love marijuana and I make a mean dessert, plus I have yrs of experience in food service and bakery management. I could really see myself doing basically anything with marijuana and be happy
 
2021-01-18 12:01:51 AM  
Some kind of animal behavioral research.  There's a wide range of animals and insects I (think I) would have liked to study. The travel and exotic locations would have been a bonus.
And in a more pervy vein... yoga instructor. Just for the scenery and hands on, ummm... assistance.
 
2021-01-18 12:06:22 AM  
EMT now. Dream job was a pilot. Then I found out how insanely expensive it was just to get a PPL. Then the plane costs, fuel costs, airport fees, FBO fees. You have to be rich just to tote around in a single engine Cessna.
 
2021-01-18 12:09:51 AM  
Astronaut. Have an academic position in an area that they have historically picked someone from but even with that, I've never made it to even the phone call round. If they keep their ever 4-5 year setup, the next round of applications is probably the last shot I have age wise to get picked. Only positions that could make me leave job at the moment would be if they do accept my astronaut application for this year's class or if the incoming admin asks me to take an appointed position.
 
2021-01-18 12:35:30 AM  
When I was a kid, I wanted to be a lawyer.
This is much better.
 
2021-01-18 12:56:59 AM  
When I was a kid, I wanted to pilot giant robots for a living. What I do now is definitely not that.
 
2021-01-18 1:47:23 AM  
I always wanted to be a Biologist. More specifically I wanted to be a forest ranger or a field biologist like Farley Mowat in "Never Cry Wolf". Unfortunately, jobs like that were rare in the 90's, so I stumbled into molecular and computational biology. I ended up in a rewarding job that affords me the respect of my peers and pays obscenely well. I love my work but now I have to run through the woods on my own time.
 
2021-01-18 3:52:41 AM  
Sit around and post on Fark, play video games, and waste time jabbering with people all day.  Disability makes these things possible, mind you - so it's not exactly the picnic I thought it would have been when I was a young Cosmonaut.  Of course now they're trying to take that away, apparently after 15 years of unchanging grinding farking omg ow, they've decided I was mysteriously cured - 'cause an othropod that likely has no idea WTF Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy even is talked to me for 10 minutes.  Yeah...

/anyone know a good disability lawyer that works for people like me that are poorer than 3 church mice?
//btw, even without the pain and suffering etc. sitting around essentially doing nothing gets boring as hell fast
///ain't what it's cracked up to be - 'specially after years of it
 
2021-01-18 3:57:12 AM  

it wont be okay and nothing will change: I could really see myself doing basically anything with marijuana and be happy


Anything? Ewwwwwwww!
 
2021-01-18 4:26:56 AM  
I'm lucky af that I'm doing what I like and went to school for.

But as a male who grew up during the 80s and 90s? Astronaut, fighter pilot, baseball player, race driver. In that order.
 
2021-01-18 4:30:08 AM  
As a kid I I just wanted my real parents to come and take me back to my home planet, where I'd become an engineer on a spaceship or something.

Real life I've been a low-level diplomat with two foreign postings, lawyer, and now a college lecturer. Space would have been better, but I'm not complaining.
 
2021-01-18 4:55:54 AM  
Actual jobs for which I have collected actual paychecks:

Strip club DJ, video game tester/tip team/support/supervisor/Online Immortal (SEGA, Sony and 3DO), chocolate shop manager, dog chef, escort service coordinator, and pretzel twister, along with the boring stuff like grocery store manager, corporate trainer, hosting/domains business owner, teahouse/steakhouse/cantina server, Salesforce Admin/Developer/Consultant, jetski sales, crypto daytrader (ok, this is not an actual check but I pulled profits enough to pay all living and entertainment expenses in San Fran for a year)

Right now I'm a cannabis tech manager...
 
2021-01-18 7:04:23 AM  
Wanted to be an Egyptologist after reading an old book called "The Lost Queen of Egypt" in third grade. Went to a college with only a few archaeology courses and took a class in Victorian Literature taught by an amazing professor and switched my major from History to English. Worked for 15 years in TV news, switched to proposal/grant writing when daughter was born. Now I'm digging for dollars for worthy non-profits. Moral of the story: books make you crazy.
 
2021-01-18 7:56:49 AM  
I used to watch a lot of TV.

My parents had some of my dad's work acquaintances over for dinner and one of them asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. I was about 7.

I told them, in all seriousness, that I was going to be an international playboy.

At age... hmmm.... second grade.. so maybe 8.. I had this idea I got from playing with magnets that you could have a bunch of magnets repelling a bunch of other magnets, and you could run a train on that with no wheels. My science teacher had invited her son, who was doing post-doc work at the University of Colorado in engineering to listen to all her students' ideas. He thought my idea was particularly interesting.

>>I wonder if anything ever became of that<<

By age 12, I suppose, I was telling people I did not want to grow up to be president, but Secretary of State... because that is where the real power is. Eight years later I was taking a class along with someone who went on to become Secretary of State.

Actual jobs and actual paychecks. Groundskeeper, fast food worker, busboy, and about 8 other jobs. I enjoy my current job immensely. It includes all the best characteristics of being an international playboy, and none of the inconvenient ones.
 
2021-01-18 8:22:30 AM  
When I was younger I wanted to be a Hollywood stuntman. I loved and still do, movies and TV shows with a lot of action sequences. Today, I am a test tech for a defense contractor. Not quite the same thing, but I get to play with expensive toys that can blow things up.
 
2021-01-18 8:49:48 AM  
Computer programmer or jet pilot.  Jets make me throw the hell up so I am now a computer programmer.
 
2021-01-18 8:53:18 AM  

Cagey B: When I was a kid, I wanted to pilot giant robots for a living. What I do now is definitely not that.


Yes.  I wanted to pilot a Veritech Hover Tank or a Cyclone..
 
2021-01-18 8:54:05 AM  
I'm a writer. I wanted to be a fighter pilot/astronaut. But then I was told there *would* be math.

/actually, red/green colorblind
 
2021-01-18 9:27:56 AM  
I always wanted to be a marine biologist. Before I got to college, I saw how hard they had to work for no money and I did not want to do that, plus I swear I could smell the sweaty frenchmen on those NOVA specials with the Cousteau's. I work at a computer firm. However, I would now love to run a velodrome, I just bought one ticket for the Powerball (those things are 2 dollars now!), so I will keep you posted.
 
2021-01-18 9:33:01 AM  
In seventh grade I started writing comic strips and erotica. In high school I couldn't write a decent essay, but I could write a serial loosely based on Don Quixote starring a cockroach. Yes, I got some funny looks for that one.

Once out of school, I tried to break into programming. Still trying 40 years later. The writing thing became a hobby once the World Wide Web took off, because you can't make money selling stuff that anyone can get for free. A story is just data, after all, and not particularly valuable data.
 
2021-01-18 9:36:41 AM  
I've always loved nature and the outdoors.  As I grew up I knew I wanted to be involved somehow in making sure that the environment is protected.

Went to college-  degree in natural resource science.

Work for government agency protecting the environment.

WIN!
 
2021-01-18 9:53:08 AM  
Hum. I don't really remember having any "fantasy" jobs. Fairly early I was introduced to drafting, took a liking to it, was encouraged to pursue it, and ended up having some talent for it. It has zero glamor, but it's made a decent career that I don't tire of. I've kinda moved past it in that now I'm a manager who tells other drafters what and how to draft, but I still get to bust out the occasional drawing myself.
 
2021-01-18 10:09:19 AM  
Job? Who the hell aspires to a job? I aspire to a life where I don't have to experience the capitalist hamster wheel of selling my life itself for money.
 
2021-01-18 10:23:31 AM  
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2021-01-18 10:24:43 AM  
Civil engineer. I didn't really know what that was but Uncle Bill in the Buffy and Jody show sure had a very cool apartment and everyone thought he was so cool and he got to travel. Sadly, that did not work out for me. Tried to take drafting and electronics in high school but was kept out for a year because the class was "full." "How about homemaking?" the guidance counselor said starting to write that in. "No, something else." Eventually ended up taking the classes and was treated like a freak in both. And with poverty and growing up in a rural area and not really having any adults I could talk to (or felt I could talk to) that was that.

Parents did one thing right which was to emphasize college, college, college. Eventually ended up in IT after a long journey and love it. So regret not being born later when I could have been that civil engineer I wanted to be. Had a pretty good career in IT (eventually) and those weird techie nerds are my people.
 
2021-01-18 11:10:24 AM  
I first wanted to be a scientist. What kind? No clue. In real life, my family owned a small motel at the beach, and I loved everything about it. Stocking and cleaning rooms, concierge-type stuff, working the desk with all of the room keys hanging on cup hooks behind me, even cleaning the pool. I took courses in whatever caught my eye in college because I was going to work at the motel, and I already knew how to do that.

Then they sold it.

Well, crap.

Now I'm a marketing copywriter and editor. The bulk of my work comes from people/companies for whom English is a second or third language trying to open new markets in the West. I still dream of having an inn or B&B. Kinda glad I don't right now, though, as that sector's taken a huge hit.
 
2021-01-18 11:20:59 AM  
I got to do mine: pilot. A shiatton of work to get there, I'll tell you. Until around age 40, when I was forced out by hearing loss.

Today, I can hear and am fully medically qualified again. Although older, the pilot shortage meant I could go back to work for a few years. I started submitting resumes. Then COVID cured the pilot shortage.

Life can be unfair.
 
2021-01-18 11:34:21 AM  
A makeup man for Playboy

/Yeah
//I'm old
///Ok boomer
 
2021-01-18 12:47:38 PM  

Stephen_Falken: Job? Who the hell aspires to a job? I aspire to a life where I don't have to experience the capitalist hamster wheel of selling my life itself for money.


Most people recognise they will never be rich so they aspire to a job that will allow them to do something they would have done if they were rich.

/I, on the other hand, got a job I can tolerate and spend my free time doing what I like
//Because the best way to stop liking something is being paid to do it
 
2021-01-18 12:52:11 PM  
My main desire as a child was to be a Veterinarian. I wanted to be the person that fixed all of the critters. Life had different plans although I did become a pretty efficient lay vet during the years we lived on a ranch.
 
2021-01-18 1:07:55 PM  
I wanted to be in special effects in movies (this was in the 80s) and I wanted to be Tom Savini's assistant. That guy can create anything. I watched a special about how he put a machete into Jason's head and had him slide down the machete. It was so neat, and that is what I wanted to do.
 
2021-01-18 2:11:33 PM  
As a child? I wanted to win the lottery. I saw how unhappy work was making the people in my life and my grandparents always seemed the happiest. My father never saw the logic, and it genuinely upset him, to the point of being grounded or lectured. I guess from his perspective, he was trying to teach me to not be a lazy bum living with parents at the age of 40 in someone's basement.

As a teenager, a veterinarian. Unfortunately, brain no am good for smart making, failed chemistry, saw it took 6 years of schooling. Thought it would be nice to help animals have a better life and such. That then turned to art and making vidya games.

I have accomplished none of those things. My job pays "good enough" to the point that I don't see myself leaving for financial reasons.
 
2021-01-18 4:25:14 PM  
So when I was in school, I wanted nothing more than to work for Disney as an animator (this was back in the 90's). I worked hard at artwork. I took art classes all the time, I learned what I could about making and painting cells by hand and even made some of my own using acetate and gauche paints.

I was good enough in art that I won multiple awards in art shows and competitions, and one of those I received a $1000/year scholarship to college.

My Junior year, my parents asked where I wanted to go for summer vacation and I told them Disney, but specifically MGM Studios Disney where they had an animation studio. I found out you could tour the animation studio and that's what I wanted to do.

We went that summer, I got to go on the tour, the animators there were working on Lion King at the time. I asked the tour guide about how one gets to work as an animator and mentioned that has been what I wanted to do for a couple of years. She actually pulled us aside when the tour was over and got us in touch with someone in the animation department who came out and talked with us. He told us the best way to do it was to go through their Disney Artist Internship program. He took my information and said he would send us information about the program.

Later that summer I got a packet in the mail from Disney. It outlined everything about the intern program including what schools they have exclusive intern programs with. And I was in luck there was one in my home state. Columbus College of Art and Design.

I dedicated my senior year to making sure I met the requirements to get in. I built a portfolio of art which I never had before. I beefed up my grades. And like I said, I won a scholarship.

Winter of my Senior year we set up a pre-freshman tour of the campus. The idea was to go spend the day, get to know some of the professors, where the dorms were, how to get from building to building. You know, standard prefresh stuff.

When the tour was comi9ng to a close, we ended at the admissions office where I was supposed to fill out a bunch of admissions paperwork and college application. Keep in mind that I met the head of that Disney Intern department and found out that the internship only accepted students after their junior year for the upcoming senior year and it would only be for one semester. But I already had my sights on it.

When we got to the admissions department, we sat with an admin who brought out the stuff to fill out, but my dad stopped her from going any further and asked her what the cost of this college would be.

Ok, I should interrupt here and tell you that looking back I should have recognized what has happening, but I didn't. You see, my dad was a cheapskate. I mean, major cheapskate. Like, doesn't let my mom buy napkins from the store because he would grab thick stacks of napkins and straws from Wendy's, stole office supplies from his work, only tipped a waitress $1 kind of cheapskate. So vacations in my family usually meant going some place where they offered up free tickets to Disney if you attend a timeshare seminar kind of vacations. And yes that's how we went on vacation that summer. And every time, he would attend the seminar then tell the people he already owned a better timeshare so let me have the tickets and he'd be on his way. And we weren't poor, by any stretch of the imagination, my dad was just that cheap. I grew up wearing ill fitting clothes because they would shop at places where you got factory seconds for cheap...

Back to the story...

He stopped the admin and told her he didn't want to bother with a sales pitch, just give him the price per year. I recall getting a sinking feeling when he did that and I recall her trying to say something about the importance of education or something and him interrupting her and asking for the price again. When she told him it would be $9k a year he slid the packet back at her, stood up, and told us to head to the car.

I don't remember the drive home. I don't remember the rest of that day. In a single blow, my dreams were crushed. I think I tried talking him into hearing them out, but whatever my efforts were they were futile and useless. My dad insisted that working in the factory at GM would be good enough for me. Art wasn't a REAL job, and he wasn't going to take out a loan just so I could doodle and never amount to anything in life. I remember putting my portfolio away and I never saw it again.

Over the course of 3 years he would do that to me 2 more times. The third time it happened, I actually would have had a free ride through social security due to becoming disabled from a car accident. I was 21 years old, but stuck in my parents because I was still rehabilitating after a car accident that landed me over a year in the hospital. I was in a wheelchair and told I could get a 4 year degree on the state's dime. I was admitted, I signed up for classes, and 2 weeks before classes started I was told that computers were just toys and he wasn't going to let me go to college to learn how to play with toys. It wasn't a REAL job. I should focus on getting back on my feet so I can start working for GM (which he was a GM/UAW retiree by the way and could get me a job with a phone call).

Skip a few years and I refused to work for GM, ended up working as assistant store manager at a Papa Johns and went to college on my own dime and grant money. Got a degree in Computer Science and to this day I work in IT as a Telecomm Avaya Admin.

It's been 27 years since that incident regarding my art. I never picked up art again until 3 weeks ago...

I made a promise to myself that I would make 2021 the year I would become creative again and I would find my passion for art somehow.

And I did.

I bought a tattoo gun... I don't plan on becoming a working tattoo artist of course, and truthfully I doubt I will ever ink someone's skin. What I did get though was a stack of practice skin to play with. And you know what? I like it. I feel *something* when I pick up the gun and put ink in the fake skin. There's an ember there and the more I play with it, the brighter it gets and the more fun I have...
 
2021-01-18 5:14:22 PM  

2fardownthread: I used to watch a lot of TV.

My parents had some of my dad's work acquaintances over for dinner and one of them asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. I was about 7.

I told them, in all seriousness, that I was going to be an international playboy.

At age... hmmm.... second grade.. so maybe 8.. I had this idea I got from playing with magnets that you could have a bunch of magnets repelling a bunch of other magnets, and you could run a train on that with no wheels. My science teacher had invited her son, who was doing post-doc work at the University of Colorado in engineering to listen to all her students' ideas. He thought my idea was particularly interesting.

>>I wonder if anything ever became of that<<

By age 12, I suppose, I was telling people I did not want to grow up to be president, but Secretary of State... because that is where the real power is. Eight years later I was taking a class along with someone who went on to become Secretary of State.

Actual jobs and actual paychecks. Groundskeeper, fast food worker, busboy, and about 8 other jobs. I enjoy my current job immensely. It includes all the best characteristics of being an international playboy, and none of the inconvenient ones.



By "none of the inconvenient ones" I presume you mean penicillin shots.
 
2021-01-18 5:37:25 PM  
I wanted to be a lawyer.  My whole life.
By the time I got to college (after only passing high school by the skin of my teeth) and being a 'C' student at best in all my poli-sci classes I realized it was never going to happen.

Even if I got into a Law School (which I doubt I would be able to), there is no way I would pass the classes, let alone the BAR
(I've never passed a bar in my life! (Best joke in The Money Pit))

And if by some strange twist of fate I DID pass Law School, I doubt I would get a good job, assuming I had to go to a shiatty Law School because of my college transcripts.

Which means I would spend my entire life in debt to Law School and never really getting to DO the job I wanted to in the first place.

It's rough realizing and admitting you're just not that smart.
 
2021-01-18 11:39:15 PM  
I wanted to be a wife and mother. White picket fence etc.  at 27, divorced, with two small children I enrolled at Ivy Tech vocational college. Started to be a secretary but then I heard about the computer programming degree. Back when it was called computer programming not coding. I liked it. I could tell the computer what to do when I could not tell my ex-husband what to do.    Worked for a local company for 30 years which was bought out twice and I was finally laid off in June due to COVID-19.  It was a very good career.
 
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