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(Twitter)   FritoLay the preferred food of Lizard Zodiac Killers, seen frantically writing press releases to deny all association   (twitter.com) divider line
    More: Amusing, shot  
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4232 clicks; posted to Politics » on 16 Jan 2021 at 4:05 AM (7 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



53 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all

 
2021-01-15 10:46:39 PM  
Original Tweet:

 
2021-01-15 10:49:02 PM  
Not Democracy, obviously, but Doritos: mmm-mmm Seditious!
 
2021-01-16 3:12:44 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size


Go fark yourself with a jagged Dorito, Ted.
 
2021-01-16 4:07:41 AM  
Look

I laughed.

I still hate his guts and this attempt to change the topic.
 
2021-01-16 4:10:42 AM  
It would explain why his hoomun skin suit looks so greasy...
 
2021-01-16 4:11:00 AM  
Guess who else liked Doritos and Ronald Reagan but disavowed fruit loops.
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-01-16 4:12:33 AM  
Ted Cruz can go fark himself with a cactus covered in lemon juice and razor blades, but I chuckled a little bit at that tweet.
 
2021-01-16 4:14:44 AM  
The cruz booger was a moist chunk of dorito?
 
2021-01-16 4:15:15 AM  
pbs.twimg.comView Full Size


"How can that be profitable for Frito Lay?"
 
2021-01-16 4:16:35 AM  
Can you imagine, as a Dorito, how frightening and disheartening it would feel to be eaten by Ted Cruz? It'd be like getting fed to the Sarlacc...

images.dailykos.comView Full Size
 
2021-01-16 4:20:24 AM  
You need a comma after FritoLay.
 
2021-01-16 4:20:56 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-01-16 4:22:55 AM  
Politics and snacking shouldn't really influence each other.

I'm not going to stop eating Cheetos just because Trump is often compared to one.

It doesn't count anyway because I get the Jalapeno variety, and that neutralizes the white power carbs.
 
2021-01-16 4:23:12 AM  
He enjoys Doritos and little white boogers.
 
2021-01-16 4:25:48 AM  
Puts on Q cap: it's clear to me that Doritos being triangular are intended to represent reptilian heads. He's signaling his people
 
2021-01-16 4:28:02 AM  
Jay's Potato Chips was named Jap's Potato Chips before WWiI made that name anathema.

Jay's are still shiatty wafer chips that beg Ruffles for a signature.
 
2021-01-16 4:28:28 AM  
He's so whitewashed anyway. A Latino with any integrity eats Takis en Feugo anyway
 
2021-01-16 4:32:26 AM  
Old Dutch is superior anyway.
 
2021-01-16 4:33:19 AM  
Y'all ever noticed Ted Cruz has an ugly wife? Someone should let him know. I bet he will be furious!
 
2021-01-16 4:35:16 AM  
From the comments:

We all know that orange ring around your mouth isn't from the Dorito's.
 
2021-01-16 4:37:50 AM  

Hagbardr: [Fark user image 425x538]


And, as per the photo, he likes a warm feeling on his chin too. He's a sick farker.
 
2021-01-16 4:38:27 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-01-16 4:39:11 AM  

jook: From the comments:

We all know that orange ring around your mouth isn't from the Dorito's.


Fark that's good, I wish I could think that shiat up.
 
2021-01-16 4:43:40 AM  
I once did a 2-month contract temp position thingie with PepsiCo's corporate tax department. Super-friendly people--I was envious of them for having permanent careers there. Anyway, one of the perks of working there was that proposed new Frito Lay snack products that were still in the "experimental" phase were always being passed around so that they could get feedback about them. Jalapeno Cheetos, White Cheddar Sea Salt Doritos, Cinnamon this, Fruit puffed that, etc., etc., and huge amounts of all kinds of other munchies that never quite made it past research & development. And of course, in the cafeteria, all Pepsi products were free. I must have gained about 20 pounds during that temp job.

/CSB
 
2021-01-16 4:55:18 AM  
Republicans: "Don't worry, we'll make more traitors."
 
2021-01-16 5:11:00 AM  
Okay... This is starting to mess with me.

So, there's a fake news correction going around... Is it mocking CNN or Ted Cruz?  On the one hand there's "hurr durr, CNN doesn't know what a QAnon pin looks like. Stupid media." On the other hand, Ted Cruz wearing a chip clip seems about on par with Trump walking around with toilet paper on his shoe, but less explainable.  Which brings me to why in the ever-loving fark would Ted immediately lean into the chip clip angle?  Do QAnon pins look like chip clips and he's desperate for an out?  Or does he just say "I do love Doritos" whenever anyone mentions Doritos?
 
2021-01-16 5:14:58 AM  

Oysterman: Okay... This is starting to mess with me.

So, there's a fake news correction going around... Is it mocking CNN or Ted Cruz?  On the one hand there's "hurr durr, CNN doesn't know what a QAnon pin looks like. Stupid media." On the other hand, Ted Cruz wearing a chip clip seems about on par with Trump walking around with toilet paper on his shoe, but less explainable.  Which brings me to why in the ever-loving fark would Ted immediately lean into the chip clip angle?  Do QAnon pins look like chip clips and he's desperate for an out?  Or does he just say "I do love Doritos" whenever anyone mentions Doritos?


[astonished stare]
Well, they pay him every time he does.  For the smartest guy on the planet you're pretty dumb sometimes.
 
2021-01-16 5:18:16 AM  
Not surprising that his o
 
2021-01-16 5:27:56 AM  
Q: Does your momma sell potato chips?


A: Oh, my bad. I saw a sign in your front yard that read, "Lays for sale."
 
2021-01-16 5:34:20 AM  
You don't say, fatty.
 
2021-01-16 5:55:47 AM  

Original: Original Tweet:

tedcruz: I do love Doritos. https://t.co/TpmNNj16B8


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-01-16 6:26:46 AM  
Someone ask Ted Cruz what has two thumbs and sucks
 
2021-01-16 6:42:30 AM  
Well, are you stoned or are you stupid? They are Doritos for a reason, "The Munchies".

And, Ted Cruz is too dumb to be both, or in actuality do both.
 
2021-01-16 6:42:57 AM  
You can't get Doritos out on Alpha Centuri.  They make a similar snack, but it's not the same.
 
2021-01-16 6:51:57 AM  

MattyBlast: I once did a 2-month contract temp position thingie with PepsiCo's corporate tax department. Super-friendly people--I was envious of them for having permanent careers there. Anyway, one of the perks of working there was that proposed new Frito Lay snack products that were still in the "experimental" phase were always being passed around so that they could get feedback about them. Jalapeno Cheetos, White Cheddar Sea Salt Doritos, Cinnamon this, Fruit puffed that, etc., etc., and huge amounts of all kinds of other munchies that never quite made it past research & development. And of course, in the cafeteria, all Pepsi products were free. I must have gained about 20 pounds during that temp job.

/CSB


When I was in college I was part of a focus group for Pringles.

You're welcome.

/Oh, and fark Ted Cruz.
 
2021-01-16 7:02:02 AM  

Catlenfell: You can't get Doritos out on Alpha Centuri.  They make a similar snack, but it's not the same.


THIS IS CETI APLHA 5!!!
 
2021-01-16 7:05:18 AM  

I am Tom Joad's Complete Lack of Surprise: Not Democracy, obviously, but Doritos: mmm-mmm Seditious!


YUM!  Taste the treason!!
 
2021-01-16 7:05:39 AM  

Gr3asy: Politics and snacking shouldn't really influence each other.

I'm not going to stop eating Cheetos just because Trump is often compared to one.

It doesn't count anyway because I get the Jalapeno variety, and that neutralizes the white power carbs.


Cheetos wakes up and chooses violence on their own
i.imgur.comView Full Size
 
2021-01-16 7:20:26 AM  

Epoch_Zero: Gr3asy: Politics and snacking shouldn't really influence each other.

I'm not going to stop eating Cheetos just because Trump is often compared to one.

It doesn't count anyway because I get the Jalapeno variety, and that neutralizes the white power carbs.

Cheetos wakes up and chooses violence on their own
[i.imgur.com image 850x1274]


I had no idea his first name was Chester.
 
2021-01-16 7:28:07 AM  

AAAAGGGGHHHH: [Fark user image image 648x304]


God damn I love Fetterman.
 
2021-01-16 7:31:34 AM  
Ever pull a Dorito out of a bag and it's stuck to another one in an upside-down way that resembles a Star of David? And you think that's a coincidence?
 
2021-01-16 8:27:10 AM  
Utz or get the fark out.
 
2021-01-16 8:27:45 AM  

Epoch_Zero: Gr3asy: Politics and snacking shouldn't really influence each other.

I'm not going to stop eating Cheetos just because Trump is often compared to one.

It doesn't count anyway because I get the Jalapeno variety, and that neutralizes the white power carbs.

Cheetos wakes up and chooses violence on their own
[i.imgur.com image 850x1274]


Por los cheetos
 
2021-01-16 8:33:22 AM  
Doritos.....
gannett-cdn.comView Full Size

Let's make it an Ali Landry thread.
 
2021-01-16 8:46:42 AM  

Gr3asy: I'm not going to stop eating Cheetos just because Trump is often compared to one.

It doesn't count anyway because I get the Jalapeno variety, and that neutralizes the white power carbs.


At my local Wal-Mart, there's Cheeto mac and cheese. Original, Jalapeno, and Flamin' Hot. What a blessed time to be alive. 

imagesvc.meredithcorp.ioView Full Size
 
2021-01-16 10:09:28 AM  
At least there's no Dorito Bandito.
 
2021-01-16 10:25:16 AM  

Gonz: Gr3asy: I'm not going to stop eating Cheetos just because Trump is often compared to one.

It doesn't count anyway because I get the Jalapeno variety, and that neutralizes the white power carbs.

At my local Wal-Mart, there's Cheeto mac and cheese. Original, Jalapeno, and Flamin' Hot. What a blessed time to be alive. 

[imagesvc.meredithcorp.io image 850x566]


I hate myself for even being briefly tempted.
 
2021-01-16 10:46:31 AM  

cheap_thoughts: He's so whitewashed anyway. A Latino with any integrity eats Takis en Feugo anyway


Well, he is a native of Canada, after all...
 
2021-01-16 2:07:45 PM  

Wobambo: Gonz: Gr3asy: I'm not going to stop eating Cheetos just because Trump is often compared to one.

It doesn't count anyway because I get the Jalapeno variety, and that neutralizes the white power carbs.

At my local Wal-Mart, there's Cheeto mac and cheese. Original, Jalapeno, and Flamin' Hot. What a blessed time to be alive. 

[imagesvc.meredithcorp.io image 850x566]

I hate myself for even being briefly tempted.


I hate myself cause I bought boxes of it.

They tastes like kraft and cheetos farked in a low rent motel.

Meaning when I am high I can eat like 3 boxes.

Especially the green box, yeah yeah it says jalepeno or some shiat on the front, but it tastes like green. mmmmhmmm.
 
2021-01-16 3:32:42 PM  
"I heard"

Hagbardr: [Fark user image 425x538]


"Where did you hear it?"

"I just said it, and then I heard it with my own ears!"
 
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