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(Onion AV Club)   The odds of surviving the level of cocaine needed to think "Charlize Theron falls in love with Seth Rogen. It can work." are more than just a long shot   (film.avclub.com) divider line
    More: Obvious  
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2441 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 15 Jan 2021 at 12:05 PM (6 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



42 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2021-01-15 12:11:55 PM  
The film completely flopped at the box office. (Opening the weekend after Avengers: Endgame certainly didn't help on that count.)

Only reason I even remember this movie existed was the obnoxious Youtube ads for it, dead serious claiming "Everyone is talking about Long Shot!"
No, Seth, nobody was talking about your movie.
 
2021-01-15 12:14:19 PM  
"Mister Owl, how many lines of coke does it take to believe that Charlize Theron falls in love with Seth Rogan?"

"Let's find out. One... ah-two... thrrrree. Three."
 
2021-01-15 12:20:59 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-01-15 12:33:19 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-01-15 12:34:36 PM  
My usually-very-critical film nerd friend says this movie is actually pretty good, for what it is, which he acknowledges is shocking, considering the premise, the actors, and the trailers and ads.
 
2021-01-15 12:35:23 PM  
Seth Rogen is fart humor incarnate.
 
2021-01-15 12:36:37 PM  
Long shot?  That's a bottle and half of rum.
 
wee
2021-01-15 12:37:50 PM  

alaric3: Seth Rogen is fart humor incarnate.


But in this rom-com he gives the hyper-something woman the space to be a her!

Or some such shiat. That blog post sucked.
 
2021-01-15 12:38:31 PM  

fallingcow: My usually-very-critical film nerd friend says this movie is actually pretty good, for what it is, which he acknowledges is shocking, considering the premise, the actors, and the trailers and ads.


It's a cute movie with a few real laughs.

Definitely worth seeing on a date night.
 
2021-01-15 12:39:17 PM  
Believe me, goofy charming can go a long way. Though I haven't liked everything he's done, Seth Roger has shown he can pull off goofy charming since Freaks and Geeks.
 
2021-01-15 12:46:38 PM  
[Whispers] Mr...F...
 
2021-01-15 12:50:55 PM  
This movie was pretty good.  And Charlize Theron looks even better than usual.
 
2021-01-15 12:52:40 PM  
Also, have you seen Seth Rogan's real wife? Damn
 
2021-01-15 12:59:03 PM  
I saw it on an airplane. I enjoyed it.
 
2021-01-15 1:01:43 PM  
I don't get the reflexive Seth Rogen hate whenever his name appears in a headline. He's not the product of nepotism or forced exposure like Pauly Shore and other hack comedians. He actually worked his way up from doing standup in Canada in his early teens, then got cast in Freaks and Geeks at age 16 and was a young staff writer for Da Ali G Show and Undeclared (Judd Apatow's second TV show, which Seth also acted in).

Some of his stuff is clunky, but he has a great track record overall. If you didn't see The 40 Year Old Virgin or Knocked Up in theaters, you missed out on a great social experience. He also co-wrote Superbad, which is absolutely one of the best comedies of the last 20 years. Sure, it's a lot of fart and dick jokes, but so is much of Mel Brooks' material.

Maybe we're oversaturated with Seth Rogen in popular media, but for me he gets a lifetime pass for the projects I already named.
 
2021-01-15 1:04:50 PM  

Eddie Hazel's E string: I don't get the reflexive Seth Rogen hate whenever his name appears in a headline. He's not the product of nepotism or forced exposure like Pauly Shore and other hack comedians. He actually worked his way up from doing standup in Canada in his early teens, then got cast in Freaks and Geeks at age 16 and was a young staff writer for Da Ali G Show and Undeclared (Judd Apatow's second TV show, which Seth also acted in).

Some of his stuff is clunky, but he has a great track record overall. If you didn't see The 40 Year Old Virgin or Knocked Up in theaters, you missed out on a great social experience. He also co-wrote Superbad, which is absolutely one of the best comedies of the last 20 years. Sure, it's a lot of fart and dick jokes, but so is much of Mel Brooks' material.

Maybe we're oversaturated with Seth Rogen in popular media, but for me he gets a lifetime pass for the projects I already named.


I don't get it either.  A website full of people who look exactly like him but without all the success.
 
2021-01-15 1:05:13 PM  

Eddie Hazel's E string: I don't get the reflexive Seth Rogen hate whenever his name appears in a headline. He's not the product of nepotism or forced exposure like Pauly Shore and other hack comedians. He actually worked his way up from doing standup in Canada in his early teens, then got cast in Freaks and Geeks at age 16 and was a young staff writer for Da Ali G Show and Undeclared (Judd Apatow's second TV show, which Seth also acted in).

Some of his stuff is clunky, but he has a great track record overall. If you didn't see The 40 Year Old Virgin or Knocked Up in theaters, you missed out on a great social experience. He also co-wrote Superbad, which is absolutely one of the best comedies of the last 20 years. Sure, it's a lot of fart and dick jokes, but so is much of Mel Brooks' material.

Maybe we're oversaturated with Seth Rogen in popular media, but for me he gets a lifetime pass for the projects I already named.


An unattractive Jewish guy making me laugh? That's farkakte!
 
2021-01-15 1:06:12 PM  
He's actually not a bad looking guy, he's just a normal looking guy who is standing next to Charlize Theron. We would all look like Seth Rogen if we stood next to Charlize Theron. Besides, plenty of hot people date normal looking people.
 
2021-01-15 1:09:55 PM  

Trail of BABYMETAL DEATH: Also, have you seen Seth Rogan's real wife? Damn


Yeah, but in real life, Seth Rogen is rich.
 
2021-01-15 1:12:01 PM  
I'm still despondent that Charlize Theron has not responded to any of my phone calls oh, I think I would be a much better match than Seth Rogen.

I have been getting a lot of phone spam from some company named FBI, maybe that is her agent?
 
2021-01-15 1:18:08 PM  
It's the same mentality of Harvey Weinstein, slobs who can only score with quality trim by basically paying for it or  using leverage.
 
2021-01-15 1:26:08 PM  
Gee I wonder if the movie was written by a man who looks like Rogen, or a woman who looks like Theron.

It's a riddle I tell you.
 
2021-01-15 1:27:27 PM  
There's leave reality at the door and then there is this movie.  This movie is less realistic than Star Wars.
 
2021-01-15 1:31:42 PM  
Seems like in every interview she's done for the past 5 years, she wants to talk about how she can't get a date. So her standards could be rock-bottom these days...
 
2021-01-15 1:41:18 PM  
The movie was decent enough - not great, not bad - but yeah it was really tough to buy that the two of them would hit it off.

Especially since Charlize has promised herself to me...
 
2021-01-15 1:49:26 PM  

Bslim: It's the same mentality of Harvey Weinstein, slobs who can only score with quality trim by basically paying for it or  using leverage.


Seth Rogan is Harvey Weinstein and Charlize Theron is quality trim.

JFC
 
2021-01-15 1:55:16 PM  

Champion of the Sun: fallingcow: My usually-very-critical film nerd friend says this movie is actually pretty good, for what it is, which he acknowledges is shocking, considering the premise, the actors, and the trailers and ads.

It's a cute movie with a few real laughs.

Definitely worth seeing on a date night.


I agree 100%. Seth and Charlize were on Stern talking it up before it's release and I had a couple memories. First, Charlize Theron can cuss like a sailor and it's VERY sexy to hear. Second, I remember thinking that the movie was going to suck because of the ridiculous premise.

Some months later it was on HBO or something and I stopped to watch it and thought it was quite entertaining. Some good humor about liberal/conservative politics helped plus Charlize Theron. Damn.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2021-01-15 2:07:10 PM  
Oh, why not?  I've seen unattractive people with beautiful people before (and no, it didn't involve a gold digger or trophy wife / husband).
 
2021-01-15 2:14:23 PM  
Loved it, but then I'm a sucker for a decent rom-com (Notting Hill & Three to Tango are faves)
 
2021-01-15 2:42:41 PM  
CSB on
i used to work in a hospital lab and ran comprehensive drug screens for the ER.  I was in the lab by myself when a priority screen come ups.  NBD, i extract and run it start to look a the results and holy farking mother of god.  The chromatogram was just awash in peaks.  There was a massive peak that was 1000s of times more than the system could handle.  I do a quick search and it comes back as cocaine.  a bunch of the other peaks come back as cocaine metabolites. it would have taken me a day to go through the whole thing but this guy is in a bad way so i call the ER.

Me to ER doc: there is a ton of cocaine in that sample
ER doc: we figured based on the white powder in his beard.  Also he woke up for a few seconds and all he said was "more cocaine" before he went unconscious again.
Me: yeah well i don't know how much but i've never seen anything like this before.
ER doc: if you had to guess how much do you think?
Me: All of it.  All the cocaine, from everywhere, worldwide.
ER doc: got it.  see anything else?
Me: it'll take me a couple hours to go through everything.  This is the craziest sample i've ever seen. I'm not sure it matters though.
ER doc: hold on a second.  *talks to someone in the background* Take your time.  He just coded.

cocaine is a hell of a drug.

CSB off\
 
2021-01-15 3:01:27 PM  
Charlize Theron: Between Two Ferns with Zach Galifianakis
Youtube 83I_rQUbw8c
 
2021-01-15 3:12:17 PM  

Streetwise Hercules: "Mister Owl, how many lines of coke does it take to believe that Charlize Theron falls in love with Seth Rogan?"

"Let's find out. One... ah-two... thrrrree. Three."


I wouldn't know firsthand but I'm gonna assume that much coke would kill a large adult owl so fast his head would spin.
 
2021-01-15 3:22:57 PM  

tom baker's scarf: CSB on
i used to work in a hospital lab and ran comprehensive drug screens for the ER.  I was in the lab by myself when a priority screen come ups.  NBD, i extract and run it start to look a the results and holy farking mother of god.  The chromatogram was just awash in peaks.  There was a massive peak that was 1000s of times more than the system could handle.  I do a quick search and it comes back as cocaine.  a bunch of the other peaks come back as cocaine metabolites. it would have taken me a day to go through the whole thing but this guy is in a bad way so i call the ER.

Me to ER doc: there is a ton of cocaine in that sample
ER doc: we figured based on the white powder in his beard.  Also he woke up for a few seconds and all he said was "more cocaine" before he went unconscious again.
Me: yeah well i don't know how much but i've never seen anything like this before.
ER doc: if you had to guess how much do you think?
Me: All of it.  All the cocaine, from everywhere, worldwide.
ER doc: got it.  see anything else?
Me: it'll take me a couple hours to go through everything.  This is the craziest sample i've ever seen. I'm not sure it matters though.
ER doc: hold on a second.  *talks to someone in the background* Take your time.  He just coded.

cocaine is a hell of a drug.

CSB off\


I just pictured Simon Pegg and Nick Frost having this entire conversation, and it was beautiful.
 
2021-01-15 3:30:20 PM  
I enjoyed it. It was Cute and entertaining.  I like Seth Rohan tho. Wife and I watched it, and it led to naked stuff.
 
2021-01-15 3:52:52 PM  

jmr61: Champion of the Sun: fallingcow: My usually-very-critical film nerd friend says this movie is actually pretty good, for what it is, which he acknowledges is shocking, considering the premise, the actors, and the trailers and ads.

It's a cute movie with a few real laughs.

Definitely worth seeing on a date night.

I agree 100%. Seth and Charlize were on Stern talking it up before it's release and I had a couple memories. First, Charlize Theron can cuss like a sailor and it's VERY sexy to hear. Second, I remember thinking that the movie was going to suck because of the ridiculous premise.

Some months later it was on HBO or something and I stopped to watch it and thought it was quite entertaining. Some good humor about liberal/conservative politics helped plus Charlize Theron. Damn.

[Fark user image 696x993]


I'll just leave this here.

Charlize Theron Takes a Rorschach Test While Eating Spicy
 
2021-01-15 4:07:31 PM  

Wing Kong Exchange Day Trader: I enjoyed it. It was Cute and entertaining.  I like Seth Rohan tho. Wife and I watched it, and it led to naked stuff.


90% of the movies I watch these days are watched for this reason alone.

And yeah, same experience with this one.
 
2021-01-15 4:44:14 PM  

capt.snicklefritz: Wing Kong Exchange Day Trader: I enjoyed it. It was Cute and entertaining.  I like Seth Rohan tho. Wife and I watched it, and it led to naked stuff.

90% of the movies I watch these days are watched for this reason alone.

And yeah, same experience with this one.


I haven't watch it but Bridgerton on Netflix is my favorite show on TV for the same reason.  It's like tequila and a night out dancing. And I get to sit in the other room and Watch the Expanse.  It's perfect.
 
2021-01-15 6:21:10 PM  
About as likely or plausible as Seth Rogan scoring with Katherine Heigl.

/still love that movie anyway
 
2021-01-15 10:15:38 PM  
He also did that comedy with Katherine Heigel. Schlubs knocks up the hot gal.
 
2021-01-15 10:54:06 PM  

Wendigogo: About as likely or plausible as Seth Rogan scoring with Katherine Heigl.

/still love that movie anyway


Katherine Heigl is the lower limit of believability for me for who can get with Seth Rogan.
But Charlize Theron with Seth McFarland worked in A Million Ways to Die in the West.  They're both really charming in that movie and she was ridiculously more gorgeous than ever.  It's the boots and prairie dresses.
 
2021-01-15 11:56:01 PM  

Tman144: Trail of BABYMETAL DEATH: Also, have you seen Seth Rogan's real wife? Damn

Yeah, but in real life, Seth Rogen is rich.


i.pinimg.comView Full Size


They've been married for 9 years and Seth Rogen has only married once.  He seems like a genuine guy and has decent political beliefs.
 
2021-01-16 10:04:59 AM  

Aquapope: Wendigogo: About as likely or plausible as Seth Rogan scoring with Katherine Heigl.

/still love that movie anyway

Katherine Heigl is the lower limit of believability for me for who can get with Seth Rogan.
But Charlize Theron with Seth McFarland worked in A Million Ways to Die in the West.  They're both really charming in that movie and she was ridiculously more gorgeous than ever.  It's the boots and prairie dresses.


Curiosity piqued. I'll have to check that out.
 
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