Skip to content
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Washington Post)   "Dear Amy, I tried to get out of the friend zone but failed miserably. What am I doing wrong?"   (washingtonpost.com) divider line
    More: Awkward, Friendship, 1990s American television series, Interpersonal relationship, great love, Love, Last February, family members, potential partner  
•       •       •

478 clicks; posted to Discussion » on 04 Dec 2020 at 9:05 AM (6 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



46 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2020-12-04 8:42:16 AM  
be attractive
 
2020-12-04 8:46:41 AM  
"If you really, really, really wanna zigazig-ah
You gotta get with my friends.
Easy V doesn't come for free, she's a real lady
And as for me. Ha, you'll see"

- Confucious Spice
 
2020-12-04 9:02:31 AM  
Penis enhancement surgery.
 
2020-12-04 9:16:07 AM  
There is no getting out of the friend zone unless you are attractive and/or rich. If you were attractive and/or rich you would have never got in the friend zone to begin with so its a Catch 22.
 
2020-12-04 9:16:54 AM  
"When you "work on yourself," your goal should be to find new ways to experience the satisfaction (and joy) of liking - and loving - the man you are, with or without a partner."

That pretty much nails it. Either you're good with yourself or you're not - if you require someone else to do that for you, you're never going to get there.

That said, while it's certainly true it isn't particularly useful. No one else can tell you how to be satisfied with yourself.

Well, not exactly true... I can: the secret is to fark her dad.
 
2020-12-04 9:20:16 AM  
There aren't many examples of unattractive men with wealth being successful with women.

So I would say double down on your sense of humor. Funny guys get all the action.
 
2020-12-04 9:29:50 AM  
Strike while the iron is hot, and you either make it, or get rejected.

If you are in the friendzone it means you probably blew your chance already, and you are farked.

A fickle species indeed
 
2020-12-04 9:42:18 AM  
I think the problem is that so much popular culture -- like, well, Friends -- shows people ending up with an existing friend as "The One." So some people, like the letter writer, start to think that's the norm.

But in real life, you usually start dating someone and then hopefully become friends with them.
 
2020-12-04 9:48:25 AM  
You have a few options.

1. Focus all your attention towards that person, do nice things for them because you want to bang them then seethe in anger and call her a whore when she rejects you.

2. Get really drunk, call/text her a million times gushing your heart out at her and then call her a whore when she rejects you.

3. Carve her name into your chest with a hook , send her photos of your handywork, and call her a whore when she rejects you.

4. Stow your burning passion for her in your back pocket, go join an MRA forum, get the best advice, decide you are an Incel then threaten to shoot up her house and then call her a whore when she rejects you.

5. Just lead with calling her a whore, cause biatches love getting negged.
 
2020-12-04 9:51:35 AM  
Small penis
 
2020-12-04 9:55:05 AM  
Either your truck is too small or the spoiler on your Honda is.
 
2020-12-04 9:59:24 AM  
Women can smell desperation and it isn't attractive.
 
2020-12-04 10:01:44 AM  
Jesus, you sound creepy as shiat using the phrase "Friend Zone".  There is no Friend Zone. There is only the Romantically Incompatible Zone, also commonly known as the "She doesn't have to fall in love with you Zone".

You're not entitled to advance to the Romantic Relationship phase simply because you're nice, or you put the time in, or that you're in love with someone. If they're not into you romantically, they're not into you romantically.

You didn't get Friend Zone'd. You got rejected romantically. Grow the fark up, accept that it wasn't meant to be, and get on with your search.

Don't use that phrase. It's dangerous and creepy and reeks of entitlement to someone's feelings.
 
2020-12-04 10:02:23 AM  

vudukungfu: be attractive


Also, don't be unattractive.

Sexual Harassment and You - Saturday Night Live
Youtube PxuUkYiaUc8
 
2020-12-04 10:03:17 AM  

Gramma: Women can smell desperation and it isn't attractive.


stinky
Youtube oGylgjSiEOQ
 
2020-12-04 10:07:44 AM  
Here's how to avoid Friend Zone.  Go straight for the butt sex....first thing and always.  As in "Hello.  My name is Richard Johnson.  I really like the butt sex and want to drag you into that room back there and give it to you now.  Let's go."  Many things might happen as a result of such an introduction but none of them will be Friend Zoning.  You might want to pre-arrange bail before trying this the first time.
 
2020-12-04 10:09:44 AM  
Being "nice" is not enough. Lots of people are nice. Being "interesting" is far more valuable.

I have a friend from work who complaints about always being the "nice" guy who maybe gets a date now and then but never gets a relationship. But if you talk to him, he has no real hobbies except going to the bar (in normal times) and biatching about things, he goes on no travel, he seems to have no real interests or passions EXCEPT wanting a relationship. Not even video games or movies or something geeky.

Nice might - might - get you the first date but if your date gets bored while talking to you on the FIRST DATE then unless you're the best fark ever they're going to lose interest.

Work on yourself. Find things you like to do and do them. Don't do them just to have something interesting to say, do things because you enjoy them. Travel. Read. Whatever. People are a lot more interested in a complete person than they are a desperate boring blob.
 
2020-12-04 10:10:43 AM  

Hooker with a Penis: There is no getting out of the friend zone unless you are attractive and/or rich. If you were attractive and/or rich you would have never got in the friend zone to begin with so its a Catch 22.


The hell seriously?  How about "There's no getting out of the friend zone because they aren't interested in going there with you, period."  No "Fixing it" or "be X or Y" bullshiat, it just isn't there.  No forcing it, and trying WILL fark everything up and it will be your own dumbassery that got you there.  Accept reality, be mopey about it for a while and move the fark on like you aren't 12 years old FFS.
 
2020-12-04 10:18:18 AM  
Dear Ser Jorah,

Forget it. She's not worth it. She's hot for her nephew and bat-shiat crazy. Trust us.

OLG
 
2020-12-04 10:18:44 AM  
Use diethyl ether, not dimethyl ether.
 
2020-12-04 10:25:20 AM  

yomrfark: Strike while the iron is hot, and you either make it, or get rejected.

If you are in the friendzone it means you probably blew your chance already, and you are farked.

A fickle species indeed



*disclaimer*
If your iron is hot for more than 4 hours, seek medical attention.
 
2020-12-04 10:36:03 AM  
Snuff Box - Fuck You
Youtube 9dgwxLbZXhk

NSFW language
 
2020-12-04 10:37:26 AM  
There are only two ways out of the friend-zone. You can find a girlfriend, reduce contact and hope she misses you or you can get the two of you shiatfaced and fark her the right way 4-6 hours. 

Good luck.
 
2020-12-04 10:39:49 AM  
Stop being such a nice guy. So I've been told by greasy nerds...
 
2020-12-04 10:40:03 AM  
Make sure you always have food stains on your shirt tie and coat. Pants, too. Chicks dig that. It means you're ready for sloppy sex. That's a huge turn on for most women. Trust me, I know. I always keep a few mustard and ketchup packets with me when I'm going on a date. If things aren't going well I just go to the men's room, Smear some of the good stuff on my lapels, and march right out there full of confidence. It never fails.
 
2020-12-04 10:52:08 AM  
I am a 27-year-old straight man. My closest male friends are married or engaged. I can count on one hand the number of friends and same-age relatives I have who are not in committed, long-term romantic relationships.

Liking someone who doesn't like you back does really suck, and I'm starting to see some wisdom in starting your own family earlier than I did, but this guy definitely needs a cluebat if he thinks his life is over because he's still single at 27.
 
2020-12-04 10:59:01 AM  

Martian_Astronomer: I am a 27-year-old straight man. My closest male friends are married or engaged. I can count on one hand the number of friends and same-age relatives I have who are not in committed, long-term romantic relationships.

Liking someone who doesn't like you back does really suck, and I'm starting to see some wisdom in starting your own family earlier than I did, but this guy definitely needs a cluebat if he thinks his life is over because he's still single at 27.


Well, I'm not so sure.

I'm not exactly a ladies man.  But I met the distaffbopper when I was 25, and we were married when I was 28.

Maybe not over, and it's never too late until you die, but he definitely needs to recognize that this one is a lost cause and move on.
 
2020-12-04 11:06:27 AM  
 
2020-12-04 11:12:24 AM  
that was a weak answer from the columnist

Best answer:  By age 27 its a good idea to ask friends to help you meet other friends of theirs.   You like them (and they like you) so the odds are much better that they know people who might mesh with you.  Which is also why so many people meet their future spouse at a wedding - friends of friends.
 
2020-12-04 11:13:22 AM  
The Friend Zone is for loading and unloading only. There is no farking in the Friend Zone.
 
2020-12-04 11:26:47 AM  
I'm going for lunch soon with a chick who wants to be only friends. I wish she felt differently because she's totally cool. But hey, lunch with a cool, very cute friend who wants to learn how to draft. I'm not complaining. And outdoor seating, socially distanced at a quiet place on a nice day.
 
2020-12-04 11:43:34 AM  

sxacho: I'm going for lunch soon with a chick who wants to be only friends. I wish she felt differently because she's totally cool. But hey, lunch with a cool, very cute friend who wants to learn how to draft. I'm not complaining. And outdoor seating, socially distanced at a quiet place on a nice day.


Broads don't like it when you call them chicks
 
2020-12-04 11:51:44 AM  
It is the middle ground between acquaintance and lover
Between affection and intercourse,
And it lies in the pit of man's fears and the summit of his knowledge
This is the dimension of celibacy
It is an area which we call The Friend Zone
 
2020-12-04 12:02:02 PM  

G. Tarrant: Being "nice" is not enough. Lots of people are nice. Being "interesting" is far more valuable.

I have a friend from work who complaints about always being the "nice" guy who maybe gets a date now and then but never gets a relationship. But if you talk to him, he has no real hobbies except going to the bar (in normal times) and biatching about things, he goes on no travel, he seems to have no real interests or passions EXCEPT wanting a relationship. Not even video games or movies or something geeky.

Nice might - might - get you the first date but if your date gets bored while talking to you on the FIRST DATE then unless you're the best fark ever they're going to lose interest.

Work on yourself. Find things you like to do and do them. Don't do them just to have something interesting to say, do things because you enjoy them. Travel. Read. Whatever. People are a lot more interested in a complete person than they are a desperate boring blob.


True. But--difficulty: depression.

The advice, which is the only option and thus not bad advice, is to fake it until you make it.  Stubborn depression however means you'll never truly "make it," but you can at least benignly fool a few people (never yourself) along the way, to limited degrees.  And you can at least die, hopefully not too soon, saying you tried.
 
2020-12-04 12:15:43 PM  
Double up on the dick-pics
 
2020-12-04 12:42:25 PM  

sxacho: I'm going for lunch soon with a chick who wants to be only friends. I wish she felt differently because she's totally cool. But hey, lunch with a cool, very cute friend .


That totally works . Hanging out with a pretty girl while checking out other women . Those women  notice that . You are out with a pretty woman but looking at them .
 
2020-12-04 12:47:58 PM  

DannyBrandt: There aren't many examples of unattractive men with wealth being successful with women.


memegenerator.netView Full Size
 
2020-12-04 1:19:37 PM  
Gruys, imagine this.

There's a woman that you don't find attractive at all, isn't your type and really turns you off.  You don't really her, but she likes you and she's 'nice.'

Would you date her?
 
2020-12-04 1:26:24 PM  

Brandi Morgan: Gruys, imagine this.

There's a woman that you don't find attractive at all, isn't your type and really turns you off.  You don't really her, but she likes you and she's 'nice.'

Would you date her?


Id throw her a bone, then let her down gently.
 
2020-12-04 1:45:30 PM  

Brandi Morgan: Gruys, imagine this.

There's a woman that you don't find attractive at all, isn't your type and really turns you off.  You don't really her, but she likes you and she's 'nice.'

Would you date her?


This guy, to his credit, doesn't seem to think that his friend owes him anything, he's just sad that she doesn't like him back and sad that he made things awkward. I understand that a fairly nasty internet subculture has grown up around the implications of the "friend zone" over the last decade two decades, but this guy seems to be admitting that it's not anybody's fault.
 
2020-12-04 2:02:56 PM  
What is so hard about being attractive/rich with a great personality....
Also stop being pseudo nice.
 
2020-12-04 2:49:07 PM  

Brandi Morgan: Gruys, imagine this.

There's a woman that you don't find attractive at all, isn't your type and really turns you off.  You don't really her, but she likes you and she's 'nice.'

Would you date her?


If she puts out?   Absolutely.

At least until I find something better.
 
2020-12-04 2:52:24 PM  

Billy Liar: Double up on the dick-pics


famouspictures.orgView Full Size
famouspictures.orgView Full Size


Cross your eyes, and it's 3D.
 
2020-12-04 5:29:15 PM  

dittybopper: Brandi Morgan: Guys, imagine this.
There's a woman that you don't find attractive at all, isn't your type and really turns you off.  You don't really her, but she likes you and she's 'nice.'

Would you date her?
---
If she puts out?   Absolutely.

At least until I find something better.
---


And that's the crux of the matter - don't be that person who is dishonest in relationships.
Anyone who is dating just because the other: has $$, or they 'put out', or you're lonely?...
Don't lead them on.  Be honest: 'I'm just in this for fun - not long-term anything.'
Then they can decide whether they like you enough to be 'just for fun'.

/ Women hate being used as a 'placeholder' even more than guys hate 'friend-zone'.
 
2020-12-04 5:39:27 PM  
Learn to play an instrument, and play it in public at the drop of a hat. Also, keep an interesting animal with you at all times.
 
2020-12-04 11:08:49 PM  

Fano: Learn to play an instrument, and play it in public at the drop of a hat. Also, keep an interesting animal with you at all times.


Yeah, good one!  Write sensitive songs about her and play them on an acoustic guitar in front of her and her friends.
 
Displayed 46 of 46 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking





On Twitter



  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.