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(CBS News)   Jolly Old Saint Nick the super spreader   (cbsnews.com) divider line
    More: Obvious, Santa Claus, Saint Nicholas, North Pole, Father Christmas, Ded Moroz, Santa Claus' travels, essential travel, Self-quarantine rules  
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2140 clicks; posted to Main » on 27 Nov 2020 at 2:45 PM (7 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



38 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2020-11-27 11:12:03 AM  
Santa needs to die.

There are already too many people living in their own reality that has no basis in facts or logic or the real world, so we don't need to be teaching kids from the  beginning to believe in magical beings that don't exist, or that lying is fine because it's always been that way.

/and the same thing goes for God.
 
2020-11-27 11:14:57 AM  

FirstNationalBastard: Santa needs to die.


killthecan.orgView Full Size
 
2020-11-27 11:31:25 AM  
Just don't let him kiss your mom.
 
2020-11-27 2:41:54 PM  
It was sad at the mall today. The whole place was packed except there were not a lot of people at the Santa pavilion. Santa sat on his chair and the kid had to stand on some sort of platform in front of him, with their masks on to take the picture. It was a sad state of affairs.

Lucky for me, my parents never lied to me about the Santa bullshiat.
 
2020-11-27 2:49:40 PM  
So everybody gets Covid-19 on Christmas? I'd rather have a lump of coal.
 
2020-11-27 2:54:00 PM  

FirstNationalBastard: Santa needs to die.

There are already too many people living in their own reality that has no basis in facts or logic or the real world, so we don't need to be teaching kids from the  beginning to believe in magical beings that don't exist, or that lying is fine because it's always been that way.

/and the same thing goes for God.


I think all works of fiction should be immolated.
 
2020-11-27 2:59:03 PM  

Mugato: It was sad at the mall today. The whole place was packed except there were not a lot of people at the Santa pavilion. Santa sat on his chair and the kid had to stand on some sort of platform in front of him, with their masks on to take the picture. It was a sad state of affairs.

Lucky for me, my parents never lied to me about the Santa bullshiat.


I'm sure that your parents are quite proud that you hang out at the mall hoping to see young children sit on Santa's lap.
 
2020-11-27 2:59:23 PM  

FirstNationalBastard: Santa needs to die.


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-11-27 3:00:09 PM  

Man On A Mission: FirstNationalBastard: Santa needs to die.

[killthecan.org image 850x466]


COVID19 is real.

Your "god" is not.
 
2020-11-27 3:03:43 PM  

Kumana Wanalaia: Man On A Mission: FirstNationalBastard: Santa needs to die.

[killthecan.org image 850x466]

COVID19 is real.

Your "god" is not.


thumbs.gfycat.comView Full Size
 
2020-11-27 3:06:32 PM  
Old Nick - Forest of Grief (Full Album)
Youtube 4Hsnf2TLkGg
 
2020-11-27 3:09:25 PM  
 
2020-11-27 3:11:36 PM  
Solution is to build an individual robot Santa for every child.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-11-27 3:16:22 PM  
From the children's jump rope song:

"Old Father Christmas what'd you think he did
He upset the cradle and out fell the kid
The kid began to blubber
So he hit him with a shovel

And o-u-t spells out
 
2020-11-27 3:18:23 PM  

Kumana Wanalaia: Man On A Mission: FirstNationalBastard: Santa needs to die.

[killthecan.org image 850x466]

COVID19 is real.

Your "god" is not.


So who decides what's "real" and what isn't?
 
2020-11-27 3:18:59 PM  
Obviously no thoughts but what about some prayers?

/ It's always a good time to tell your omnipotent god, alpha and omega, that it is wrong and you know better
 
2020-11-27 3:25:54 PM  

Billy Liar: Kumana Wanalaia: Man On A Mission: FirstNationalBastard: Santa needs to die.

[killthecan.org image 850x466]

COVID19 is real.

Your "god" is not.

So who decides what's "real" and what isn't?


The unicorn king.
 
2020-11-27 3:27:03 PM  

Billy Liar: So who decides what's "real" and what isn't?


Joe from Accounting.
 
2020-11-27 3:38:36 PM  
There's nothing to worry about. Santa isn't capable of catching or passing the virus. It affects humans and a few other species.

Santa is an Elf. It says so in his biography: 'right jolly old elf.'

He can't catch COVID because he doesn't have the right receptor proteins in his cells.
 
2020-11-27 3:46:23 PM  

Kumana Wanalaia: Billy Liar: Kumana Wanalaia: Man On A Mission: FirstNationalBastard: Santa needs to die.

[killthecan.org image 850x466]

COVID19 is real.

Your "god" is not.

So who decides what's "real" and what isn't?

The unicorn king.


The Lizard King, baby!
 
2020-11-27 3:56:20 PM  

BitwiseShift: From the children's jump rope song:

"Old Father Christmas what'd you think he did
He upset the cradle and out fell the kid
The kid began to blubber
So he hit him with a shovel

And o-u-t spells out


The what what song?
 
2020-11-27 3:57:10 PM  

comrade: Mugato: It was sad at the mall today. The whole place was packed except there were not a lot of people at the Santa pavilion. Santa sat on his chair and the kid had to stand on some sort of platform in front of him, with their masks on to take the picture. It was a sad state of affairs.

Lucky for me, my parents never lied to me about the Santa bullshiat.

I'm sure that your parents are quite proud that you hang out at the mall hoping to see young children sit on Santa's lap.


WTF is wrong with you?
 
2020-11-27 4:05:05 PM  
Farkers see:

Fark user imageView Full Size


Farkers be like:

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-11-27 4:07:06 PM  

comrade: Mugato: It was sad at the mall today. The whole place was packed except there were not a lot of people at the Santa pavilion. Santa sat on his chair and the kid had to stand on some sort of platform in front of him, with their masks on to take the picture. It was a sad state of affairs.

Lucky for me, my parents never lied to me about the Santa bullshiat.

I'm sure that your parents are quite proud that you hang out at the mall hoping to see young children sit on Santa's lap.


That's funny...

Or you're really... really... broken.
 
2020-11-27 4:12:47 PM  

Tr0mBoNe: Just don't let him kiss your mom.


He's a bit of a swinger.

I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus - SNL
Youtube g4vktLutpiY
 
2020-11-27 4:36:00 PM  
The mythology is based on a real person.
Therefore, he's real. He's just dead.

Am I talking about Santa or Jesus?
You decide.
 
2020-11-27 4:40:35 PM  

whitefangz64: The mythology is based on a real person.
Therefore, he's real. He's just dead.

Am I talking about Santa or Jesus?
You decide.


I'll take "neither or both" for $500.
 
2020-11-27 4:45:36 PM  

comrade: Mugato: It was sad at the mall today. The whole place was packed except there were not a lot of people at the Santa pavilion. Santa sat on his chair and the kid had to stand on some sort of platform in front of him, with their masks on to take the picture. It was a sad state of affairs.

Lucky for me, my parents never lied to me about the Santa bullshiat.

I'm sure that your parents are quite proud that you hang out at the mall hoping to see young children sit on Santa's lap.


That's an interesting way to frame that comment.

Why don't you have a seat over there.
 
2020-11-27 4:47:44 PM  

Mugato: It was sad at the mall today. The whole place was packed except there were not a lot of people at the Santa pavilion. Santa sat on his chair and the kid had to stand on some sort of platform in front of him, with their masks on to take the picture. It was a sad state of affairs.

Lucky for me, my parents never lied to me about the Santa bullshiat.


Well, actually they did.
Those people with whom you lived weren't your parents.
 
2020-11-27 4:58:16 PM  

phrawgh: Kumana Wanalaia: Billy Liar: Kumana Wanalaia: Man On A Mission: FirstNationalBastard: Santa needs to die.

[killthecan.org image 850x466]

COVID19 is real.

Your "god" is not.

So who decides what's "real" and what isn't?

The unicorn king.

The Lizard King, baby!


"You cannot petition the Lord with prayer"
 
2020-11-27 6:12:32 PM  
Santa is an important lesson for kids. How else can they process the fact we are part of a simulation created by an alien teenager trying to get into college?
 
2020-11-27 6:30:32 PM  
Well, to be fair, if he was a super spreader 99.97% of everyone he spread it to would be ok.
 
2020-11-27 6:42:10 PM  

The Repeated Meme: Santa is an important lesson for kids. How else can they process the fact we are part of a simulation created by an alien teenager trying to get into college?


macnugget.orgView Full Size

 
2020-11-27 6:46:01 PM  
Subby's mom is a super spreader every night.
 
2020-11-27 6:51:16 PM  

flemardo: Subby's mom is a super spreader every night.


Try the veal and tip your waitress!

media0.giphy.comView Full Size

media1.giphy.comView Full Size

 
2020-11-27 7:17:34 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-11-27 7:39:14 PM  
Santa spreads VD!
 
2020-11-28 12:46:33 AM  
Supahfly Santa
Youtube mRTjmNJnB6I
 
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