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(Thread Reader)   The legend of Matt, mall movie theater projectionist   (threadreaderapp.com) divider line
    More: Weird  
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4861 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 Nov 2020 at 10:49 PM (12 days ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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2020-11-20 10:12:41 PM  
I think I might know that guy.  Certainly a spiritual sibling if nothing else.
 
2020-11-20 10:52:41 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-11-20 10:57:18 PM  
I ran the projector at Fox East in Reading Pa in the late 80s.

The Living Daylights got jammed and burned.
They taught me how to splice but I never did it before, under pressure.
I screwed it up and spliced like 15 minutes out of it.
I remember we had to give people their money back but it was a 2nd run theater so, to my memory, there were only like 6 people in the theater
 
2020-11-20 11:00:45 PM  
I mean, I laughed. This was enjoyable, not gonna lie.

But... Why?
 
2020-11-20 11:03:31 PM  

Social Justice Warlock: I mean, I laughed. This was enjoyable, not gonna lie.

But... Why?


Looks like a meme/comedy twitter account. Some chap having a laugh and trying to get others to have one too. Not bad, I laughed too.
 
2020-11-20 11:04:35 PM  
So, to summarize: "Matt" damaged property, both the theater's and others', Matt got caught committing petty crimes, Matt made violent statements, Matt chronically underperformed at work or outright did not work, and Matt did things that would open the business up to civil suits (like recording the films).

I get that a small local movie theater isn't exactly the pinnacle of professional responsibility, but the question remains: Why was Matt never fired despite an apparent pattern of being destructive, dangerous, a legal liability, and not even remotely performing his job?

/assuming this is in fact real
 
2020-11-20 11:06:05 PM  

Social Justice Warlock: I mean, I laughed. This was enjoyable, not gonna lie.

But... Why?


starsrift: Social Justice Warlock: I mean, I laughed. This was enjoyable, not gonna lie.

But... Why?

Looks like a meme/comedy twitter account. Some chap having a laugh and trying to get others to have one too. Not bad, I laughed too.


With a little work, and great timing on stage, that would make brilliant stand up.
 
2020-11-20 11:08:10 PM  
This article is so much more amusing if I imagine, "Only one of these is a lie," and try to guess which one.
 
2020-11-20 11:10:05 PM  
Enjoyable? In the same sense as a slow-motion train wreck, yes. As gawdawful as it is, it's difficult to tear your eyes away from it.

/reads like motorhead sherwood's dialog from Lumpy Gravy
 
2020-11-20 11:11:47 PM  

New Rising Sun: Why was Matt never fired


I would hazard a guess it's the same reason Jared 'Matt' Kushner has been in charge of both Mideast peace negotiations and the opiate crisis the last few years.
 
2020-11-20 11:16:09 PM  

Aetre: This article is so much more amusing if I imagine, "Only one of these is a lie," and try to guess which one.


All of them. It reads like bad fan fiction.
 
2020-11-20 11:17:13 PM  
That was amusing but I couldn't shake the feeling that "Matt", assuming he exists, was special needs of some sort and therefore made me a bit sad.
 
2020-11-20 11:20:00 PM  
I worked in a movie theater. It was nice seeing movies for free; I probably watched "Big" more than I should have, and I had some pretty nice co-workers. I was friends with two girls from the U.K., and after they had gone back home, one of them sent me a t-shirt. I didn't realize until years later she was probably interested in me as more than a friend.

All that food in the theater? Attracts many rodents. I remember walking into one theater while a movie was playing, just in time to see a rodent (well, at least his shadow created by the movie projection) run straight up the fabric of the wall, located about halfway towards the screen. The AMC theater on Tremont Street in Boston is so infested with mice, I stopped going there to watch movies. The mice would run over people's feet during the movie, making the people jump out of their seats. At that same theater, one time before previews started, a bat was flying around the theater.

I was an usher, and the crowd at my theater was rough and would pull all kinds of stuff to sneak into the movies. It might have explained why a few of the other ushers carried knives on them (and what I eventually did as well).
 
2020-11-20 11:20:03 PM  

Alien Robot: Aetre: This article is so much more amusing if I imagine, "Only one of these is a lie," and try to guess which one.

All of them. It reads like bad fan fiction.


I'd rather reread Acts of Gord again.
 
2020-11-20 11:21:27 PM  

VisualiseThis: That was amusing but I couldn't shake the feeling that "Matt", assuming he exists, was special needs of some sort and therefore made me a bit sad.


Your comment reminds me of this movie where this guy has a special needs brother who films him making out with his girlfriend I can't believe that's actually a movie
 
2020-11-20 11:23:08 PM  

New Rising Sun: Why was Matt never fired despite an apparent pattern of being destructive, dangerous, a legal liability, and not even remotely performing his job?


His uncle owned the theatre?
 
2020-11-20 11:27:09 PM  
I lost it at "blue whales speak German".
 
2020-11-20 11:27:59 PM  
I  worked at a theater for a couple of years. "Matt" would have been fired for a lot of the crap he allegedly did.
 
2020-11-20 11:32:15 PM  

New Rising Sun: So, to summarize: "Matt" damaged property, both the theater's and others', Matt got caught committing petty crimes, Matt made violent statements, Matt chronically underperformed at work or outright did not work, and Matt did things that would open the business up to civil suits (like recording the films).

I get that a small local movie theater isn't exactly the pinnacle of professional responsibility, but the question remains: Why was Matt never fired despite an apparent pattern of being destructive, dangerous, a legal liability, and not even remotely performing his job?

/assuming this is in fact real


Well, i mean hey... it's Matt...
 
2020-11-20 11:34:57 PM  
Former projectionist. One frame of boobs is not going to be more than unrecognizable flash at roughly 4 frames per second.

/yeah, I suck at parties
//I'm not Matt, serious
///Slashies in three, frames 4 per sec.
 
2020-11-20 11:39:40 PM  
Ya..Kinda sounds like a Chris-Chan situation there...
 
2020-11-20 11:41:46 PM  
Faker than Rudy's hair color.
 
2020-11-20 11:46:01 PM  

Wrongo: Former projectionist. One frame of boobs is not going to be more than unrecognizable flash at roughly 4 frames per second.

/yeah, I suck at parties
//I'm not Matt, serious
///Slashies in three, frames 4 per sec.


24 per second.
 
2020-11-20 11:47:24 PM  

New Rising Sun: So, to summarize: "Matt" damaged property, both the theater's and others', Matt got caught committing petty crimes, Matt made violent statements, Matt chronically underperformed at work or outright did not work, and Matt did things that would open the business up to civil suits (like recording the films).

I get that a small local movie theater isn't exactly the pinnacle of professional responsibility, but the question remains: Why was Matt never fired despite an apparent pattern of being destructive, dangerous, a legal liability, and not even remotely performing his job?

/assuming this is in fact real


I worked as a projectionist back in the 12th century or whenever it was - my first real job - and not only is this all astonishingly normal but the 'teenage managers' mentioned in the story should explain why Matt was never fired. Every theatre has a Matt.

Not coincidentally Matt is almost always the workplace weed supply.
 
2020-11-20 11:52:16 PM  
Matt would spend his lunch breaks in the game room playing Dance Dance Revolution, and got in trouble one day after he easily beat the 10 year old at Dance Dance Revolution then loudly called him a "biatch" -- the kid didn't even do anything, Matt just roasted him for nothing

This is easily in the bottom tier for the most awkward social interactions you will have with Dance Dance Revolution players.
 
2020-11-20 11:54:55 PM  

Wrongo: Former projectionist. One frame of boobs is not going to be more than unrecognizable flash at roughly 4 frames per second.

/yeah, I suck at parties
//I'm not Matt, serious
///Slashies in three, frames 4 per sec.


24. 24, not 4. fark, maybe I am Matt
 
2020-11-21 12:17:19 AM  
I worked at a theater for four years, and while not at this one. Our projectionist was just as much as a loon. He used to dry his socks on the table where they spliced the film together (we never understood how they were always so wet). One of the reasons our guy was never fired was that their used to be a projectionist union. No matter how weird he was, you couldn't fire him for that, and he knew it. So he kept his weirdness in the booth.
 
2020-11-21 12:24:42 AM  
So....Matt was a dick. Great. Thanks for sharing.
 
2020-11-21 12:26:21 AM  

New Rising Sun: So, to summarize: "Matt" damaged property, both the theater's and others', Matt got caught committing petty crimes, Matt made violent statements, Matt chronically underperformed at work or outright did not work, and Matt did things that would open the business up to civil suits (like recording the films).

I get that a small local movie theater isn't exactly the pinnacle of professional responsibility, but the question remains: Why was Matt never fired despite an apparent pattern of being destructive, dangerous, a legal liability, and not even remotely performing his job?

/assuming this is in fact real


The sad thing is that there are probably people who worked in one place long enough to see every single action (only by different employees) and list them all as "Matt stories" (presumably after a particular memorable employee horror).

Or possibly a nephew or other such "protected class".
 
2020-11-21 12:26:22 AM  
This is the author: https://threadreaderapp.com/user/KLob​s​tar

That page lists a website for him. When I try to go there I end up in a strange world, perhaps Matt's world.  The chat forum is interesting and you will love the decor.

CAN WE TALK ABOUT HOW MAD MY PISSING SKILLS ARE?
 
2020-11-21 12:27:41 AM  

VisualiseThis: That was amusing but I couldn't shake the feeling that "Matt", assuming he exists, was special needs of some sort and therefore made me a bit sad.


Fat Star Wars Kid
Youtube oMtb8l403pY

I was a relatively serious medieval re-enactor in the Society for Creative Anachronism, and as an instructor of medieval armed combat I used to run into Matt and his clones on a regular basis. Matt and his ilk lack the inclination to be trained by qualified teachers so they make up their own "training", rather like the video of the kid in the garage practicing his light saber technique. Matt tends to be too anti-social to mesh with reenactors or LARPers, but he is too emotionally unintelligent to realize when he is not wanted, so he hangs out on their periphery. Because he has disposable income from having trained his parents to enable him, Matt is a good customer for the kind of merchant who sells swords and daggers, especially the impractically jagged type.

I eventually parleyed my martial arts instruction into a gig at a private Special Edu. High School, beating some sense into teenagers, some just like Matt, others diagnosed with behavior disorders. I much preferred working with the Oppositional Defiant kids with anger issues they needed to work out, than listening to Matt and his ilk pontificate from their soapbox.

There are a surprising number of Matts out there, roaming around loose. After a dozen years in Special Ed, my hypothesis is that Matt represents a variety of undiagnosed Aspergers Syndrome. Matt probably represents a sizable segment of the "incel" community. Matt having apparently hooked up with a latina named Kumiko with whom he did not share a language does nothing to dispel that impression. The poor girl might have been an illegal immigrant, trading sex for shelter.

Matt might very well make a good case study for a previously undiagnosed neurodiversity.
 
2020-11-21 12:36:55 AM  

VisualiseThis: That was amusing but I couldn't shake the feeling that "Matt", assuming he exists, was special needs of some sort and therefore made me a bit sad.


Nah, just a weeaboo.
 
2020-11-21 12:37:49 AM  

Psychopompous: neurodiversity


Haven't heard that one in a while. Yes, Matt is indeed a poster-child for learning about the various internet subcultures, incel being one of them. The forum linked above in another post only goes to concrete that idea. Matt is a severely messed up individual who may one day become a contributing member of society, given proper training.

Weed worked for me....
 
2020-11-21 12:45:03 AM  
Bullshiat. Managers of anything in a "mall" would fire anyone that looked at them funny. Worker's rights are a joke to them. They have plenty of applications to replenish their supply. Workers are nothing but cannon fodder.
 
2020-11-21 12:48:25 AM  

Stibium: Psychopompous: neurodiversity

Haven't heard that one in a while. Yes, Matt is indeed a poster-child for learning about the various internet subcultures, incel being one of them. The forum linked above in another post only goes to concrete that idea. Matt is a severely messed up individual who may one day become a contributing member of society, given proper training.

Weed worked for me....


A lot of them seem to end up in I.T. or Cable T.V. installation
The Cable Guy Scene (Jim Carrey does Star Trek)
Youtube I5n28hpMFBE
 
2020-11-21 12:52:55 AM  

rdxdave: I worked at a theater for four years, and while not at this one. Our projectionist was just as much as a loon. He used to dry his socks on the table where they spliced the film together (we never understood how they were always so wet). One of the reasons our guy was never fired was that their used to be a projectionist union. No matter how weird he was, you couldn't fire him for that, and he knew it. So he kept his weirdness in the booth.


IATSE, baby. Projectionists are the end of the tail of filmmaking. They're still union.
 
2020-11-21 1:02:15 AM  
I knew a "Phil" who had about the same amount of social awareness disorder. Management moved him away from customer-interaction tasks.
 
2020-11-21 1:03:34 AM  

Psychopompous: Stibium: Psychopompous: neurodiversity

Haven't heard that one in a while. Yes, Matt is indeed a poster-child for learning about the various internet subcultures, incel being one of them. The forum linked above in another post only goes to concrete that idea. Matt is a severely messed up individual who may one day become a contributing member of society, given proper training.

Weed worked for me....

A lot of them seem to end up in I.T. or Cable T.V. installation
[iFrame https://www.youtube.com/embed/I5n28hpM​FBE?autoplay=1&widget_referrer=https%3​A%2F%2Fwww.fark.com&start=0&enablejsap​i=1&origin=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.fark.com&​widgetid=1]


I love that scene; the vocal trilling makes it!

/Chainmail is a perfectly adequate defense against the polearms they wield.
 
2020-11-21 1:03:44 AM  
Exactly how many decades are you going to let Matt live rent free in your head? If the bonehead isn't family you are better off forgetting about the dude.
 
2020-11-21 1:06:05 AM  

whosits_112: VisualiseThis: That was amusing but I couldn't shake the feeling that "Matt", assuming he exists, was special needs of some sort and therefore made me a bit sad.

Nah, just a weeaboo.


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-11-21 1:17:06 AM  
I worked a theater job. There were a lot of farking Matt's. I probably had more than my share of Matt moments.

/job was a party
//how we didn't all get that place shut down i'll never know
 
2020-11-21 1:24:18 AM  
It's like if Bill Brasky was a moran.
 
2020-11-21 1:24:42 AM  
"I never saw Matt again, but he still posts on Fark to this day."
 
2020-11-21 1:28:00 AM  

New Rising Sun: So, to summarize: "Matt" damaged property, both the theater's and others', Matt got caught committing petty crimes, Matt made violent statements, Matt chronically underperformed at work or outright did not work, and Matt did things that would open the business up to civil suits (like recording the films).

I get that a small local movie theater isn't exactly the pinnacle of professional responsibility, but the question remains: Why was Matt never fired despite an apparent pattern of being destructive, dangerous, a legal liability, and not even remotely performing his job?

/assuming this is in fact real


I'm guessing he was still a union projectionist even after being suspended from the projection booth.
 
2020-11-21 1:33:57 AM  

Mr. Shabooboo: whosits_112: VisualiseThis: That was amusing but I couldn't shake the feeling that "Matt", assuming he exists, was special needs of some sort and therefore made me a bit sad.

Nah, just a weeaboo.

[Fark user image 321x257]


Fark user imageView Full Size


I thought that's what weeaboo referred to until I looked it up. I think a true weeaboo would insist on the katana being superior to the scimitar.
 
2020-11-21 2:00:20 AM  

New Rising Sun: So, to summarize: "Matt" damaged property, both the theater's and others', Matt got caught committing petty crimes, Matt made violent statements, Matt chronically underperformed at work or outright did not work, and Matt did things that would open the business up to civil suits (like recording the films).

I get that a small local movie theater isn't exactly the pinnacle of professional responsibility, but the question remains: Why was Matt never fired despite an apparent pattern of being destructive, dangerous, a legal liability, and not even remotely performing his job?

/assuming this is in fact real


It's "real adjacent". I have lived long enough to have seen this very behavior in grocery/retail, sales, tech sector, medical, and other professions, both in person working those careers and sadly as a customer. It reeks of "composite" and yet is so very sadly familiar.

I have seen both that rampant level of unprofessionalism and idiocy and quite frankly Autistic behavior from both staff and management with no real correction of either; hell, some places follow the Peter Principle and promote both kinds of idiots just to get them out of harm's way, s-l-o-w-l-y building a case against the idiots until they could make an ironclad argument for dismissal. I know for a fact it once took Lucent Technologies damn near 15 years to fire two of their worst-case farkoffs that way, dodging the union.

It may be a joke, but sadly the reality of it is what makes it funny.
 
2020-11-21 4:01:16 AM  

New Rising Sun: So, to summarize: "Matt" damaged property, both the theater's and others', Matt got caught committing petty crimes, Matt made violent statements, Matt chronically underperformed at work or outright did not work, and Matt did things that would open the business up to civil suits (like recording the films).

I get that a small local movie theater isn't exactly the pinnacle of professional responsibility, but the question remains: Why was Matt never fired despite an apparent pattern of being destructive, dangerous, a legal liability, and not even remotely performing his job?

/assuming this is in fact real


Well, have you seen any of the dozen or so episodes of community that deal with why people are so patient with Abed?
 
2020-11-21 4:04:31 AM  
This reminded me of the story of Kevin, the stupidest student this teacher had known:

https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/co​m​ments/219w2o/whos_the_dumbest_person_y​ouve_ever_met/cgbhkwp/
 
2020-11-21 4:08:14 AM  

Psychopompous: VisualiseThis: That was amusing but I couldn't shake the feeling that "Matt", assuming he exists, was special needs of some sort and therefore made me a bit sad.

[Youtube-video https://www.youtube.com/embed/oMtb8l40​3pY]
I was a relatively serious medieval re-enactor in the Society for Creative Anachronism, and as an instructor of medieval armed combat I used to run into Matt and his clones on a regular basis. Matt and his ilk lack the inclination to be trained by qualified teachers so they make up their own "training", rather like the video of the kid in the garage practicing his light saber technique. Matt tends to be too anti-social to mesh with reenactors or LARPers, but he is too emotionally unintelligent to realize when he is not wanted, so he hangs out on their periphery. Because he has disposable income from having trained his parents to enable him, Matt is a good customer for the kind of merchant who sells swords and daggers, especially the impractically jagged type.

I eventually parleyed my martial arts instruction into a gig at a private Special Edu. High School, beating some sense into teenagers, some just like Matt, others diagnosed with behavior disorders. I much preferred working with the Oppositional Defiant kids with anger issues they needed to work out, than listening to Matt and his ilk pontificate from their soapbox.

There are a surprising number of Matts out there, roaming around loose. After a dozen years in Special Ed, my hypothesis is that Matt represents a variety of undiagnosed Aspergers Syndrome. Matt probably represents a sizable segment of the "incel" community. Matt having apparently hooked up with a latina named Kumiko with whom he did not share a language does nothing to dispel that impression. The poor girl might have been an illegal immigrant, trading sex for shelter.

Matt might very well make a good case study for a previously undiagnosed neurodiversity.


Why the ODD kids?
 
2020-11-21 4:33:58 AM  

My Klezmer Metal Cover Band: New Rising Sun: So, to summarize: "Matt" damaged property, both the theater's and others', Matt got caught committing petty crimes, Matt made violent statements, Matt chronically underperformed at work or outright did not work, and Matt did things that would open the business up to civil suits (like recording the films).

I get that a small local movie theater isn't exactly the pinnacle of professional responsibility, but the question remains: Why was Matt never fired despite an apparent pattern of being destructive, dangerous, a legal liability, and not even remotely performing his job?

/assuming this is in fact real

I worked as a projectionist back in the 12th century or whenever it was - my first real job - and not only is this all astonishingly normal but the 'teenage managers' mentioned in the story should explain why Matt was never fired. Every theatre has a Matt.

Not coincidentally Matt is almost always the workplace weed supply.


I worked at a theater in high school and our version of "Matt" was asked about the 2003 remake of Peter Pan by a customer he replied that he "Loved it because there was a lot of male full frontal nudity in it" (there isn't).

He never actually got fired, he just stopped showing up to work one day and that was that.  Eventually he came back and tried to see a free movie wearing a home made shirt that just said "Animal buttsex" on it.  Then he was banned from the theater and never heard from again after that
 
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