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(Patheos)   Self-titled 'Christian Prophetess' Kat Kerr: God told me every person voting early was voting for Trump. Now it's time for me to openly pray in front of a group and cameras, followed by a Red Lobster lunch   (friendlyatheist.patheos.com) divider line
    More: Unlikely  
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1299 clicks; posted to Politics » on 27 Oct 2020 at 11:57 AM (4 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



84 Comments     (+0 »)
 
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2020-10-27 11:02:08 AM  
Not this early voter, asshole. So I guess that nixes your prophetic visions, now doesn't it?
 
2020-10-27 11:20:00 AM  
That God! He's such a nefarious prankster?
 
2020-10-27 11:31:31 AM  

TuckFrump: Not this early voter, asshole. So I guess that nixes your prophetic visions, now doesn't it?


You don't count.  She's only capable of Republican prognostication, because that's where the money is who God loves.
 
2020-10-27 11:39:06 AM  
Well god told me that you're an asshole.

/straight from the top
 
2020-10-27 11:43:27 AM  
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"I AM A PROPHETESS !"

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2020-10-27 12:00:07 PM  
By her rules, we're now allowed to throw rocks at her, right?
 
2020-10-27 12:00:12 PM  
Not sure who your god is, asshole, but whoever he is is a lying sack of shiat.  I know because I voted early and I most certainly did not vote for that steaming pile of orange shiat.
 
2020-10-27 12:00:18 PM  

Circusdog320: That God! He's such a nefarious prankster?


Such a mischievous scamp! It's like he likes nothing more than farking with his prophets by telling them complete bullshiat.
 
2020-10-27 12:01:55 PM  
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2020-10-27 12:01:58 PM  
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2020-10-27 12:02:21 PM  
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2020-10-27 12:02:30 PM  
i.pinimg.comView Full Size
 
2020-10-27 12:02:55 PM  
She's crazy but the people who believe her are crazier.
 
2020-10-27 12:03:40 PM  
What she hasn't figured out yet is "God" is just someone who is messing with her through her iPhone speaker when she's alone...
 
2020-10-27 12:03:46 PM  
How come God never speaks to normal people like Carl Sagan or Fauci or Fred Rogers?
 
2020-10-27 12:03:56 PM  
Nine Inch Nails-Heresy (with lyrics)
Youtube tzlc-KsIUIU
 
2020-10-27 12:04:12 PM  
oh fer chrissake.
 
2020-10-27 12:04:15 PM  
Too f*cking easy.

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2020-10-27 12:04:36 PM  
Another day, another Nostradumbass.
 
2020-10-27 12:04:48 PM  
The bible has pretty stringent standards when someone claims to be a prophet carrying the word of God. And if the word the utter is confirmed to be a lie, well stoning is one of the better outcomes.

/ So I'll be out back in the creek bed gathering smooth flat river rocks.
// If people aren't held accountable there is no limit to the evil they can do.
 
2020-10-27 12:04:48 PM  
Pretty sure 'god' said nothing, ever, but... OK.
 
2020-10-27 12:05:06 PM  

TuckFrump: Not this early voter, asshole. So I guess that nixes your prophetic visions, now doesn't it?


Just relax, she's a camgirl who gets to keep her clothes on, much to the relief of everyone.

My favorite part of this is she's one initial away from madness.
 
2020-10-27 12:05:10 PM  
She will be Sekulow and Giuliani's star witness when they sue all the swing states because the Democrats stole the election. If you KNOW that those votes were all for Trump via divine intervention, and you scan them in only to find a majority for Biden, the only conclusion you can come to is they were tampered with.
 
2020-10-27 12:05:42 PM  
Maybe she's just getting the word "Prophetess" mixed up with "Profiteer"?  That would at least be a bit more believable to the rubes.
 
2020-10-27 12:05:43 PM  
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2020-10-27 12:06:03 PM  
wrong!
i voted for biden/HARRIS five weeks ago
 
2020-10-27 12:08:57 PM  
Bet she was wearing mixed fabrics at the time too.

/+1 Schmitty.^_^
 
2020-10-27 12:09:37 PM  
her onlyfans page is decent!

i.pinimg.comView Full Size


/magic filters are magic
 
2020-10-27 12:09:38 PM  

edmo: How come God never speaks to normal people like Carl Sagan or Fauci or Fred Rogers?


Mr. Rogers was the type that if God spoke to him, he'd never mention it.
 
2020-10-27 12:10:30 PM  
Now we know where Trump is getting his polling numbers.
 
2020-10-27 12:10:53 PM  
I've got about six little surprises for the Pat Robertson in drag...you heard wrong.
 
2020-10-27 12:11:29 PM  

LeoffDaGrate: Maybe she's just getting the word "Prophetess" mixed up with "Profiteer"?  That would at least be a bit more believable to the rubes.

"Gods tend to be more interested in prophets, not profits, a-ha."
There were some blank looks from his fellow directors.
"Didn't quite get that one, old chap," said Stowley.
"Prophets, I said, not profits," said Gilt. He waved his hand. "Don't worry yourselves, it will look better written down."


Terry Pratchett, Going Postal
 
2020-10-27 12:11:38 PM  
Kat Kerr, the self-proclaimed Christian "Prophetess" who thinks Heaven is home to cows driving tractors and a city made entirely out of Jell-O, recently saw a bunch of people standing in line to vote.

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2020-10-27 12:11:56 PM  

Xzano: The bible has pretty stringent standards when someone claims to be a prophet carrying the word of God. And if the word the utter is confirmed to be a lie, well stoning is one of the better outcomes.

/ So I'll be out back in the creek bed gathering smooth flat river rocks.
// If people aren't held accountable there is no limit to the evil they can do.


Stoning her?

She already sounds stoned out of her gourd.

/Follow the sandal and not the gourd or be doomed to the fiery furnace is my point here.
 
2020-10-27 12:13:13 PM  

grumpfuff: edmo: How come God never speaks to normal people like Carl Sagan or Fauci or Fred Rogers?

Mr. Rogers was the type that if God spoke to him, he'd never mention it.


Since Sagan and Rogers are both dead he may actually be speaking to them
 
2020-10-27 12:15:40 PM  
Voted early, voted straight Dem. Your god can get stuffed.
 
2020-10-27 12:16:33 PM  
There sure seems to be a lot of prophets out there these days. God should just get them all together and do an conference call with them. It might free up some time for him to go for a walk or maybe take a nap. After talking to all these nut jobs I would need a nap.
 
2020-10-27 12:16:50 PM  
Her connection to God is shoddy, because I know at least 2 people for sure voted early for Biden.
 
2020-10-27 12:17:06 PM  

TuckFrump: Not this early voter, asshole. So I guess that nixes your prophetic visions, now doesn't it?


Your vote has been thrown out, misplaced, or somehow discounted.

You really think Trump will allow Dem votes to be counted?
 
2020-10-27 12:17:23 PM  
Uh.

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2020-10-27 12:17:29 PM  
God told me that gods don't exist.

God showed up in my garage one Saturday morning while I was straightening up a bit. I knew it was God because I could just feel his divine presence. It was a deep feeling of peace and power that is difficult to describe. I said, "Hey, have a seat. I didn't think you really existed." He said, "I don't." I was a little puzzled because He was sitting right there on my shop stool. He said, "I have decided not to exist and I just want to tell someone. I'm not going to stop existing. I'm going to have never existed. I am not going to have existed for the entirety of all space and time. I never existed and I never will." That was quite profound and while I pondered this statement I noticed that He was gone. Everything was still and quiet. Then I heard a dog barking in the distance and finished organizing my socket sets.
 
2020-10-27 12:20:39 PM  
FTFA: "many of them are Christians; they know God chose him"

I'm a Christian and I know Trump is an anti-Christ and you're a false prophet.
 
2020-10-27 12:21:00 PM  
Why are all the real crazies, the truly ill who would have been locked away before the 80's closing of all the state hospitals, always huge trumpers?  You don't often see someone shave a feral cat colony, drive through a Wendy's and rant at the window for a half hour about how the Moon is a CIA surveillance device that is watching you, and then happily go off to vote for Biden.
 
2020-10-27 12:22:14 PM  
Christian prophetess, eh? Well, that's a bold afterlife decision choice; walking around for all eternity on the eighth circle of hell with your head on backwards.

Neat.
 
2020-10-27 12:22:46 PM  
I am amused by the number of "prophets" there are in nutbar fundamentalist Christian (I repeat myself, I know) circles, given this, said by someone who is said to be a rather important figure in the history of that religion:

"Beware of false prophets, who come to you in sheep's clothing but inwardly are ravenous wolves. You will know them by their fruits. Are grapes gathered from thorns, or figs from thistles? So, every sound tree bears good fruit, but the bad tree bears evil fruit. A sound tree cannot bear evil fruit, nor can a bad tree bear good fruit. Every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire. Thus you will know them by their fruits."
 
2020-10-27 12:23:22 PM  
on her web site, the donation page is called "the treasury"...of course...

https://www.katkerr.com/the-treasury/
 
2020-10-27 12:24:02 PM  
"you only have one chance to establish credibility"
~god

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2020-10-27 12:24:34 PM  
You know, intellectually I am aware that people like this exist. But to actually see them in action is a whole other deal. They are so koo koo for cocopuffs it boggles the mind. There's nothing wrong with having faith, but people who use it to delude themselves to this extent are just crazy. They would be crazy with or without religion.

If they didn't come out so regularly to vote I would gladly let them live in their cocopuff world.
 
2020-10-27 12:24:53 PM  

PirateKing: By her rules, we're now allowed to throw rocks at her, right?


Deuteronomy 18:20-22
English Standard Version
20 But the prophet who presumes to speak a word in my name that I have not commanded him to speak, or[a] who speaks in the name of other gods, that same prophet shall die.' 21 And if you say in your heart, 'How may we know the word that the Lord has not spoken?'- 22 when a prophet speaks in the name of the Lord, if the word does not come to pass or come true, that is a word that the Lord has not spoken; the prophet has spoken it presumptuously. You need not be afraid of him.

Seems like a 'yes' to me.
 
2020-10-27 12:26:12 PM  
"good god Lemon!"
~Jackie D

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