Skip to content
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(New Zealand Herald)   The Karaka Chainsaw Massacre   (nzherald.co.nz) divider line
    More: Sick  
•       •       •

3698 clicks; posted to Main » on 27 Oct 2020 at 3:31 AM (4 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



28 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2020-10-27 3:37:43 AM  
Read this as Karaoke.
Would support this.
 
2020-10-27 3:45:50 AM  
Apparently, no one owns guns in this neighborhood.
 
2020-10-27 3:55:17 AM  
That is disgusting. It's probably someone that hates when they bloom and get all over the cars.
 
2020-10-27 4:05:06 AM  

daffy: That is disgusting. It's probably someone that hates when they bloom and get all over the cars.


You know what else is disgusting? TREE CUM!
 
2020-10-27 4:10:01 AM  
Are those groomed sand sidewalks?
 
2020-10-27 4:20:26 AM  
Mass arborcide.
 
2020-10-27 4:29:47 AM  

chitownmike: daffy: That is disgusting. It's probably someone that hates when they bloom and get all over the cars.

You know what else is disgusting? TREE CUM!


That Mitchell and Webb Look - Smell Off Linden Trees
Youtube aoqlYGuZGVM
 
2020-10-27 4:46:51 AM  
Trees aside,
That is a nice sidewalk....
 
2020-10-27 5:01:28 AM  
Rather odd to have someone work stealthily with a chainsaw.
 
2020-10-27 5:18:30 AM  
Hope they catch the eh-hole that did that.
 
2020-10-27 5:18:41 AM  

wademh: Rather odd to have someone work stealthily with a chainsaw.


According to the article they chopped down the trees with a chainsaw, which seems inefficient and a good way to damage the bar and chain.
 
2020-10-27 5:27:27 AM  

Harry Wagstaff: wademh: Rather odd to have someone work stealthily with a chainsaw.

According to the article they chopped down the trees with a chainsaw, which seems inefficient and a good way to damage the bar and chain.


They are small trees (an 18 year old dwarf pohutukawa is not large, look at the stumps, I've got one almost that size thats less than 10 years old), and these appear to have been drunken wankers or the like, and not much given to logical thinking. Will get caught and charged and probably a quiet kicking along the way too.

Plant some more. 18 years is nothing in tree lifespans thankfully.
 
2020-10-27 6:05:56 AM  

gaspode: Harry Wagstaff: wademh: Rather odd to have someone work stealthily with a chainsaw.

According to the article they chopped down the trees with a chainsaw, which seems inefficient and a good way to damage the bar and chain.

They are small trees (an 18 year old dwarf pohutukawa is not large, look at the stumps, I've got one almost that size thats less than 10 years old), and these appear to have been drunken wankers or the like, and not much given to logical thinking. Will get caught and charged and probably a quiet kicking along the way too.

Plant some more. 18 years is nothing in tree lifespans thankfully.


But are they actually considered Christmas trees, as the article states?

A true question. I live in Arizona, and have seen plenty of cacti and mesquite trees treated as Christmas trees, but we don't call them that.
 
2020-10-27 6:14:20 AM  

minorshan: gaspode: Harry Wagstaff: wademh: Rather odd to have someone work stealthily with a chainsaw.

According to the article they chopped down the trees with a chainsaw, which seems inefficient and a good way to damage the bar and chain.

They are small trees (an 18 year old dwarf pohutukawa is not large, look at the stumps, I've got one almost that size thats less than 10 years old), and these appear to have been drunken wankers or the like, and not much given to logical thinking. Will get caught and charged and probably a quiet kicking along the way too.

Plant some more. 18 years is nothing in tree lifespans thankfully.

But are they actually considered Christmas trees, as the article states?

A true question. I live in Arizona, and have seen plenty of cacti and mesquite trees treated as Christmas trees, but we don't call them that.


Yes, they flower beautifully over christmas, and are everywhere especially on the beaches where we all go at christmas, so are almost universally called the 'New Zealand Christmas Tree'

Typical Kiwi beach at christmas:
i0.wp.comView Full Size
 
2020-10-27 6:31:41 AM  
Nobody noticed a person with a chainsaw in front of their house felling trees into their yard?
 
2020-10-27 6:43:48 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-10-27 7:23:30 AM  
Chainsaws are so quiet, how does a guy walk down a street and do this without someone calling authorities?
 
2020-10-27 7:56:46 AM  
People are dicks sometimes.
 
2020-10-27 8:08:28 AM  

stuhayes2010: Chainsaws are so quiet, how does a guy walk down a street and do this without someone calling authorities?


Electric Chainsaws are a thing and pretty damned quiet.
 
2020-10-27 8:57:07 AM  
"Locals are stumped after eight pohutukawa trees lining a street in an upmarket Auckland suburb were inexplicably felled in a chainsaw attack over the weekend."

ʎuunɟ ƃuᴉǝq sɹǝpuɐlɐǝZ ʍǝN
 
2020-10-27 9:15:57 AM  
 
2020-10-27 11:29:18 AM  
Locals are stumped

Fark has members everywhere.
 
2020-10-27 11:31:49 AM  
If you are chopping down trees with a chainsaw. You're doing it wrong.
 
2020-10-27 2:37:21 PM  

wademh: Rather odd to have someone work stealthily with a chainsaw.


They maybe didn't actually start it up. According to the article, they were instead used to "chop" down the trees.
 
2020-10-27 2:38:26 PM  

Prof. Frink: wademh: Rather odd to have someone work stealthily with a chainsaw.

They maybe didn't actually start it up. According to the article, they were instead used to "chop" down the trees.


...which I see Harry Wagstaff already covered.

/cuts off angry fist with a machete.
 
2020-10-27 2:41:30 PM  

Prof. Frink: Prof. Frink: wademh: Rather odd to have someone work stealthily with a chainsaw.

They maybe didn't actually start it up. According to the article, they were instead used to "chop" down the trees.

...which I see Harry Wagstaff already covered.

/cuts off angry fist with a machete.


The visual in my mind of someone chopping down a tree with a chainsaw did crack me up.
 
2020-10-27 8:29:43 PM  

Sean VasDeferens: Nobody noticed a person with a chainsaw in front of their house felling trees into their yard?


OTOH, Picture you're a homeowner, seeing a deranged person chopping down every tree on your block in a row.

Do you:
A) confront the deranged chainsaw-wielding maniac chopping down all the trees
B) close the curtains
 
2020-10-27 10:14:01 PM  
The residents are affluent middle class suburb dwellers. Seems the ones who heard something just assumed it was the council and were more interested in writing a complaining email than actually going outside.

That said, there is something to be said for the thinking of my predecessor that confronting a lunatic with a chainsaw is questionable at best.
 
Displayed 28 of 28 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking





On Twitter



  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.