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(Winston-Salem Journal)   "Well-known" North Carolina pastor urinates on sleeping passenger during flight from Las Vegas to Detroit. FBI refuses to name him. Could it be... Satan?   (journalnow.com) divider line
    More: Sick  
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7526 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Oct 2020 at 1:05 PM (10 days ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



179 Comments     (+0 »)
 
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2020-10-18 10:15:27 AM  
Spreading the holy waters amongst the flock.
 
2020-10-18 10:25:06 AM  
R(everend) Kelly?
 
2020-10-18 10:27:45 AM  
Well he's probably not black.  Because his face would be plastered on TMZ by this point if he was.  Discretion is for whites only.

// Maybe I'll be wrong, but I kinda doubt it.
 
2020-10-18 10:33:45 AM  
Beverly said she had to sit in her urine-soaked clothes for the rest of the flight, about three more hours, before it landed at Detroit Metro Airport.

Not a single person on the flight said, "Yo, I have a clean t-shirt in my carry-on if you wanna borrow it."?  That's weird.
 
2020-10-18 10:37:23 AM  
Ambien-the sleep aid of Satan.  Get it today.

/ Franklin?
 
2020-10-18 10:40:43 AM  
sleep-peeing because he was using a sleep-aid... guess I should pay more attention to the 50 seconds of disclaimers in a 1 minute pharmaceutical commercial
 
2020-10-18 10:48:16 AM  
It was an act of God.
 
2020-10-18 11:12:08 AM  
My brother once peed in the fridge while sleep walking.
Sleep walkers do weird shiat.
 
2020-10-18 12:41:43 PM  

kbronsito: My brother once peed in the fridge while sleep walking.
Sleep walkers do weird shiat.


My sister had a classmate who sleepwalk peed in a fridge at a slumber party. Same girl sleepwalk peed on another friend's brother's bed while he slept in it at a different slumber party.

Call me uptight, but after my first slumber party sleepwalk peeing incident, I would decline all future slumber party invitations.
 
2020-10-18 1:10:07 PM  
In America perverts are protected if they wear clerical robes.
 
2020-10-18 1:10:36 PM  
Let's see, Billy Graham is dead, and I don't think his jackass son is technically a pastor, so I give up.
 
2020-10-18 1:10:42 PM  
It's not like anybody from the flight isn't free to name him.

Yo, I saw __________ straight up pissing on a lady on this flight.

If nobody tweeted or instagramed it, he ain't actually famous. Also, he's flying coach?
 
2020-10-18 1:11:29 PM  

kbronsito: My brother once peed in the fridge while sleep walking.
Sleep walkers do weird shiat.


My brother almost peed on my mom while sleepwalking, lucky for her she was a light sleeper and was able to wake him up in time.
 
2020-10-18 1:12:18 PM  
Please let it be Joel Osteen. Oh please, oh please, oh please.
 
2020-10-18 1:14:54 PM  
If accidentally peeing on a passed out nearby person disqualifies you from being a pastor...

Just add it to the pile of things that will disqualify me from ever being a pastor.

/Plus I hate kids.
 
2020-10-18 1:15:41 PM  

Harry Wagstaff: kbronsito: My brother once peed in the fridge while sleep walking.
Sleep walkers do weird shiat.

My brother almost peed on my mom while sleepwalking, lucky for her she was a light sleeper and was able to wake him up in time.


Are you sure this isn't a PornHub storyline?
 
2020-10-18 1:16:19 PM  
nanidafuq!
 
2020-10-18 1:17:02 PM  

cew-smoke: Please let it be Joel Osteen. Oh please, oh please, oh please.


That crook probably has his own planes and harems of his own to pee on.
 
2020-10-18 1:17:45 PM  

cew-smoke: Please let it be Joel Osteen. Oh please, oh please, oh please.


Being that he is from Houston, I am going to go with no.
 
2020-10-18 1:18:17 PM  
Again?
 
2020-10-18 1:18:29 PM  
Isn't this a repeat?
 
2020-10-18 1:19:15 PM  
I had a friend who was shiat faced drunk at a party and kept going into a door to pee. It was a closet.

I used to take ambien until the wife caught me nude eating a chicken leg and whizzing in a potted plant.
 
2020-10-18 1:20:45 PM  

theflatline: I had a friend who was shiat faced drunk at a party and kept going into a door to pee. It was a closet.

I used to take ambien until the wife caught me nude eating a chicken leg and whizzing in a potted plant.


Soooo...  Friday night?
 
2020-10-18 1:21:01 PM  
R Kelly is a pastor?
 
2020-10-18 1:22:49 PM  
what's worse the flying into Detroit? Being pissed on flying into Detroit

/ Yes I know DTW is in Romulus
 
2020-10-18 1:23:11 PM  

theflatline: I had a friend who was shiat faced drunk at a party and kept going into a door to pee. It was a closet.

I used to take ambien until the wife caught me nude eating a chicken leg and whizzing in a potted plant.


I think everybody has that "Jimmy peed in the closet" story. And it's never HIS closet either.
 
2020-10-18 1:23:48 PM  
Numbers 1 , verse 1.
 
2020-10-18 1:24:26 PM  
When my son was around age 6 he did a fair amount of sleepwalking.

He apparently had competing urges to find me and to head to the bathroom to pee.  So he would head to where I spend my evenings (either the computer chair or my bed) and if I wasn't there he would pee all over where I was supposed to be.
 
2020-10-18 1:25:11 PM  
I did this in my parents' bedroom when I was five.  Sleepwalked up next to my dad and scared him awake.  It was like the creepy child standing over you in the middle of the night from a horror movie.  But instead of murdering him, I peed my PJs.

I had a college roommate with a similar story, but it was his girlfriend's parents' bedroom, and he wasn't sleeping.  He was drunk AF.
 
2020-10-18 1:25:34 PM  
was that bad? should he not have done that?
 
2020-10-18 1:26:23 PM  

Psychohazard: R Kelly is a pastor?


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-10-18 1:26:30 PM  
That's 50 bucks extra on Spirit.
 
2020-10-18 1:27:46 PM  
Too bad it wasn't this Pastor Gas. That whole flight would have been lit.

The Original Farting Preacher aka Pastor Gas ( full version )
Youtube dtW5upD5oW4
 
2020-10-18 1:32:30 PM  
In Russia, you have to pay extra for that.
 
2020-10-18 1:32:41 PM  
cdn.quotesgram.comView Full Size
 
2020-10-18 1:32:58 PM  
What sort of pastor doesn't fly in his own plane? God must not love him very much.
 
2020-10-18 1:33:51 PM  

cew-smoke: Please let it be Joel Osteen. Oh please, oh please, oh please.


Osteen has his own jets, so it's not him.
 
2020-10-18 1:33:51 PM  

cew-smoke: Please let it be Joel Osteen. Oh please, oh please, oh please.


Like he flies commercial.
 
2020-10-18 1:33:55 PM  
This is why I always tell the flight attendant on a long haul if I'm going to take an Ambien.  I let them know that if they find me naked in the aisle they should please just throw a blanket over me and zip tie me to my seat, and I'll apologize profusely when we land.

It's also why I make sure I pee and poop first.
 
2020-10-18 1:35:20 PM  

SBinRR: Let's see, Billy Graham is dead, and I don't think his jackass son is technically a pastor, so I give up.


Maybe it's that jackass who compared Lincpln to Hitler.
 
2020-10-18 1:36:02 PM  

kbronsito: My brother once peed in the fridge while sleep walking.
Sleep walkers do weird shiat.


I had a friend who I thought was passed out get up off the couch once, walk past the bathroom in the hallway, whip it out, then just pee straight in the middle of the hallway carpet outside of one of the bedrooms.  We were yelling at him the whole time, but he finishing pissing, zipped up, and came back to the couch.  To be fair, we were all very, very drunk.
 
2020-10-18 1:36:53 PM  
Lol... from NC... It's Franklin Graham.
 
2020-10-18 1:39:20 PM  

Squid_for_Brains: Too bad it wasn't this Pastor Gas. That whole flight would have been lit.

[YouTube video: The Original Farting Preacher aka Pastor Gas ( full version )]


I remember watching this AT CHURCH when i was a teenager. Our youth pastor was pretty cool.
 
d23 [OhFark]
2020-10-18 1:39:41 PM  

SBinRR: Let's see, Billy Graham is dead, and I don't think his jackass son is technically a pastor, so I give up.


Is his son technically a human?  He doesn't seem to have anything like human empathy?  Could be a corporate built money grubbing robot?
 
2020-10-18 1:40:09 PM  

Squid_for_Brains: Too bad it wasn't this Pastor Gas. That whole flight would have been lit.

[YouTube video: The Original Farting Preacher aka Pastor Gas ( full version )]


I'd forgotten about that. My nine year old just said, "Yeah, I'm not watching 9 minutes of that." But I did.
 
2020-10-18 1:40:15 PM  

noitsnot: theflatline: I had a friend who was shiat faced drunk at a party and kept going into a door to pee. It was a closet.

I used to take ambien until the wife caught me nude eating a chicken leg and whizzing in a potted plant.

I think everybody has that "Jimmy peed in the closet" story. And it's never HIS closet either.


It's always "a" closet.
 
2020-10-18 1:41:12 PM  

7th Son of a 7th Son: Again?


No shiat. This is why we have No-fly lists.

/ And, maybe this guy needs "no-fly" pants
 
2020-10-18 1:42:09 PM  
Fun fact: wizzing on a fellow passenger mid-flight is apparently only a misdemeanor!
 
2020-10-18 1:42:27 PM  
Doesn't sound like she was under age. This is very unusual behavior for a pastor.
 
2020-10-18 1:42:31 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
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