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(CNBC)   Look, you're already using Zoom for work, school, church, even family get-togethers. So it's not that big a leap to using it for strip clubs, right?   (cnbc.com) divider line
    More: Interesting  
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1857 clicks; posted to Main » and Business » on 16 Oct 2020 at 11:35 AM (6 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



43 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2020-10-16 10:48:40 AM  
But what if someone Zoom-bombs the strip tease with a lecture on quantum mechanics?
 
TWX [TotalFark]
2020-10-16 10:54:01 AM  
Regarding the headline, I gather there's already a saturated market of screen-delivered adult content, both prerecorded and live, where the on-screen performers have more agency over what's going on than what strip-clubs normally provide.  The performers have little incentive to work within the framework of a strip-club when they can skip the club and go directly to the patrons with better terms than the strip-club offers.

Regarding Zoom's intent to offer paid events, this isn't a surprise.  There has already been a desire to do this on the part of event planners, integrating the payment for private paid events is a no-brainer.
 
2020-10-16 10:56:07 AM  
Cam girls have been around longer than covid.
 
2020-10-16 11:00:43 AM  
It already exists. Its called OnlyFans
 
2020-10-16 11:42:20 AM  
Too bad there isn't an AO setting for Twitch. The money people would be making would be crazypants. The downside being that professional strippers would have to compete with college girls who were taking pole dancing lessons before COVID.
 
2020-10-16 11:44:48 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-10-16 11:45:27 AM  
 can a zoom call get a former MMA fighter turned stripper to squirt boob milk in my friends face for 5 bucks ?
 
2020-10-16 11:47:38 AM  
these guys were way ahead of the game

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-10-16 11:49:00 AM  
I feel a little bad making money off this whole situation, but ZM has been one of my better pandemic stock investments that I grabbed back in late March.
 
2020-10-16 11:52:05 AM  

Xcott: But what if someone Zoom-bombs the strip tease with a lecture on quantum mechanics?


Then be both aroused and informed.
 
2020-10-16 11:57:48 AM  
But how will the stripper kick over my beer and secrete stripper dust that only my wife can find?

And if she starts sobbing about rent, can I just mute her?
 
2020-10-16 11:58:29 AM  
The suggestion of a Zoom session with some SEO consultants to discuss improving SEO results killed that consultation yesterday.

An Early Pandemic Zoom session with family was a drunkenly irritating farce.

Until this morning, I'd never heard of OnlyFans.

Glad to hear somebody is making some money from ZM but, in general, f*ck Zoom.  Good to do that while money still has some value and our hypoxic republic gasps and limps along to its demise [or its very, very drastic and ongoing revisions, at least.]
 
2020-10-16 11:58:36 AM  
People pay for porn?
 
2020-10-16 11:59:08 AM  
Isn't....isn't that just porn?
 
2020-10-16 12:01:23 PM  

alechemist: Xcott: But what if someone Zoom-bombs the strip tease with a lecture on quantum mechanics?

Then be both aroused and informed.


I've got the weirdest Heisen-Boner right now
 
2020-10-16 12:05:30 PM  
I don't use Zoom, I will never use Zoom, and I'm quite all right with that decision.

First it was "you have to have a cell phone" then it was "you have to download these APPS" then was "you have to respond to text messages like I just called you up and spoke to you" and now it's "your face has to be available at any time to log in to a chat room so that we can monitor you."

No.
 
2020-10-16 12:08:18 PM  

cryinoutloud: I don't use Zoom, I will never use Zoom, and I'm quite all right with that decision.

First it was "you have to have a cell phone" then it was "you have to download these APPS" then was "you have to respond to text messages like I just called you up and spoke to you" and now it's "your face has to be available at any time to log in to a chat room so that we can monitor you."

No.


Man yells at the cloud.
 
2020-10-16 12:09:38 PM  
See this where VR should step in and make a killing, but alas I guess we're not all the way there yet.
 
2020-10-16 12:12:29 PM  

Call the Guy: alechemist: Xcott: But what if someone Zoom-bombs the strip tease with a lecture on quantum mechanics?

Then be both aroused and informed.

I've got the weirdest Heisen-Boner right now


I may/not have the weirdest boner right now.
 
2020-10-16 12:16:42 PM  

Xcott: But what if someone Zoom-bombs the strip tease with a lecture on quantum mechanics?


That deserves an extra $5 tip.
 
2020-10-16 12:25:07 PM  
So a cam show?
 
2020-10-16 12:27:06 PM  

Xcott: But what if someone Zoom-bombs the strip tease with a lecture on quantum mechanics?


Fark user imageView Full Size


You don't work out quantum mechanics in a strip club?
 
2020-10-16 12:37:48 PM  

LegacyDL: See this where VR should step in and make a killing, but alas I guess we're not all the way there yet.


There are high-quality VR cam shows on Stripchat, pretty much realistic to my HP Reverb eyes. The technology is definitely there.

The downside is that from what I've seen on clocks, they appear to be broadcasting out of a random Ukrainian building, which could be sketchy, could be not.

So you get 100% lifelike accuracy... of the experience of talking to a Ukrainian stripper. Can't win 'em all.
 
2020-10-16 12:46:57 PM  

cryinoutloud: I don't use Zoom, I will never use Zoom, and I'm quite all right with that decision.



Using Zoom wasn't a decision most of its users made consciously.

The decision was "Do I want to keep my job?" or "Do I want to stay in school?"
 
2020-10-16 1:09:33 PM  

question_dj: It already exists. Its called OnlyFans


It already exists. It's called Chaturbate. Or MFC. Or Xhamster Live.
 
2020-10-16 1:21:58 PM  
Holy crap, they invented Pay-per-view.
 
2020-10-16 1:22:28 PM  

Cubs300: Or Xhamster Live


Xhamster?  I'll have to sit that one out.
 
2020-10-16 1:34:29 PM  

jerryskid: Cubs300: Or Xhamster Live

Xhamster?  I'll have to sit that one out.


Its not what you think its super
Fark user imageView Full Size
classy and tastfully done.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-10-16 2:13:02 PM  
Can't catch pink eye from a zoom meeting ☹
 
2020-10-16 2:34:14 PM  

snoopy2zero: jerryskid: Cubs300: Or Xhamster Live

Xhamster?  I'll have to sit that one out.

Its not what you think its super [Fark user image 425x458]classy and tastfully done.

[Fark user image 390x561]


Touche.
 
2020-10-16 2:38:39 PM  

Ambivalence: Cam girls have been around longer than covid.


Peepshow booths.
 
2020-10-16 3:07:26 PM  
It's just more internet porn. Going to a strip club, like going to a bar with live music, or a dance club, or any number of other places is something that can't really be emulated online. The draw is experiencing things in person.

You can't have a stripper sit on your lap and crappily flirt, or have boobs rubbed in your face, or have your belt stolen, or vomit in the corner and get kicked out with online porn.
 
2020-10-16 3:32:42 PM  

Xcott: But what if someone Zoom-bombs the strip tease with a lecture on quantum mechanics?


nothing takes me out of a good teacher-student scene, movie or commercials then bad math and formulas written on the blackboards.  just symbols arranged randomly.

also, whiteboards are more common now it seems in education.
 
2020-10-16 3:38:21 PM  

Zik-Zak: Xcott: But what if someone Zoom-bombs the strip tease with a lecture on quantum mechanics?

[Fark user image 514x369]

You don't work out quantum mechanics in a strip club?


i read a biography of him, how did they not mention it or how did I forget it.  I remember his stair counting thing, talking to a painter in Rio (I think), safecracker vs safecracker story, interesting story of his wife's passing.  Dude seemed interesting, I hope they didn't leave that out for posterity.
 
2020-10-16 3:42:51 PM  

Cubs300: question_dj: It already exists. Its called OnlyFans

It already exists. It's called Chaturbate. Or MFC. Or Xhamster Live.


i remember watching chaturbate for a while.  I am just flabbergasted at the amount of money people put down for cam girls.

this one couple i followed a bit at how this model works .  They were cute and all, but i saw one guy drop $300 on one tip.  I could never justify that unless money is no object.  and there little "once i get $X dollars, I'll take my top off.." tracker things on the screen.

Cam girls seem to do better then our Comms people at online communications
 
2020-10-16 3:43:18 PM  
Zoom After Dark (TM)
 
2020-10-16 3:45:23 PM  

Error 482: It's just more internet porn. Going to a strip club, like going to a bar with live music, or a dance club, or any number of other places is something that can't really be emulated online. The draw is experiencing things in person.

You can't have a stripper sit on your lap and crappily flirt, or have boobs rubbed in your face, or have your belt stolen, or vomit in the corner and get kicked out with online porn.


[challenge_accepted.jpg]

I have a stripper in my tool chest in the garage and do the boobs have to be female?  the rest if a typical Friday night
 
2020-10-16 4:07:39 PM  

Hyjamon: also, whiteboards are more common now it seems in education.


They are, but they suck.

Whiteboards and glassboards have replaced chalkboards for lots of reasons, one being that chalkdust screws up AV equipment in the classroom.  But they're really hard to read from a distance or certain angles due to glare (especially if a classroom has windows,) and many whiteboard surfaces lose their dry-erase property very easily.  This has only gotten worse now that we have to go online, because even a high-quality camera aimed at a classroom whiteboard/glassboard is close to useless.

You could probably make a bazillion dollars if you invented an economic alternative to whiteboards that looked like a chalkboard, or otherwise offered high contrast in most lighting conditions.

As for chalkboard formulas in movies, you probably dug the mathematics lecture in Sneakers.
 
2020-10-16 5:13:21 PM  

GanjSmokr: I feel a little bad making money off this whole situation, but ZM has been one of my better pandemic stock investments that I grabbed back in late March.


Mad props to my 16 year old daughter. She is in the midst of playing the virtual stock market game in HS. She was way down in the rankings until today. She suggested to her partner in the game they should 'invest in Zoom.' In the last couple days. She and her partner jumped to #3 this morning. 

There is apparently $500 on the line if they make #1.
 
2020-10-16 11:06:41 PM  

Xcott: You could probably make a bazillion dollars if you invented an economic alternative to whiteboards that looked like a chalkboard, or otherwise offered high contrast in most lighting conditions.


There are paper alternatives that have been around for decades. Nobody would use them because they've been around for decades. Cut to fit, tape up, use for a day, take down. Next day same routine.
 
2020-10-17 1:09:01 AM  
YouPorn has been around for years.
 
2020-10-17 3:14:24 PM  

thorpe: Xcott: You could probably make a bazillion dollars if you invented an economic alternative to whiteboards that looked like a chalkboard, or otherwise offered high contrast in most lighting conditions.

There are paper alternatives that have been around for decades. Nobody would use them because they've been around for decades. Cut to fit, tape up, use for a day, take down. Next day same routine.


I had a student capstone project to design a portable blackboard to use in place of a crappy classroom whiteboard.  In the end we discovered that you can buy blackboard fabric (basically vinyl-coated burlap) and bring a big roll of it into the room to hang over the whiteboard.  It was too heavy, awkward and curly (and you'd get chalkdust upon the sofa, sofaaa) but we still use the prototype chalkboard scrolls in the lab, where they can be placed around the room conveniently.

We also discovered that black butchers block paper is a cheap chalkboard surface that works moderately well, and is lightweight and easy to tape over a whiteboard.  However, it doesn't last very long and therefore produces considerable waste.

In either case, however, the chalkdust would harm the AV equipment in the long run.  What we really need is a dry-erase alternative that has the contrast and visibility of a chalkboard (meaning it can't be shiny!) and which endures use and abuse like a chalkboard.  There are melamine whiteboards with decent contrast but they last a month in a college classroom---that's why we almost always use glassboards, which are visually terrible.
 
2020-10-17 7:57:03 PM  

Petey4335: GanjSmokr: I feel a little bad making money off this whole situation, but ZM has been one of my better pandemic stock investments that I grabbed back in late March.

Mad props to my 16 year old daughter. She is in the midst of playing the virtual stock market game in HS. She was way down in the rankings until today. She suggested to her partner in the game they should 'invest in Zoom.' In the last couple days. She and her partner jumped to #3 this morning. 

There is apparently $500 on the line if they make #1.


Whats her OnlyFans handle?

/I keed I keed!
 
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