phimuskapsi: Not angry red though. Luckless Wonder is a Football Farker, and fan of the Washington [redacteds], so I have him marked vaguely the color of the team ;)

I was prepared to do a CSI-style forensic scan of your monitor and determine once and for all who the guilty party was, but I see that will not be necessary.  Thank you, citizen.

Please accept this coupon for a free account on Fark Dot Com.  It's the least our system of justice can offer you.

phimuskapsi: Your setup reminds me a lot of mine.

[Fark user image 850x637]

I enjoy how the two comments on your Fark display are both in red.

Billlbo: I know, right? Including this "speedrunner" from Summer Games Done Quick this year.

I have probably given way too much thought to the topic, and the more thought I give to it, the more insane the whole course of events is.

Like, videogame players are desperate to push this idea that games can be sports, but here is the closest thing videogames have to an actual sport and the players actively hate the physical component, they'll sabotage anything interesting about the physical performance in order to get the prettiest letter grades possible.

I'll also briefly note that the player in the video you linked regularly plays the game without footwear and only plays in socks, because when I think of a series of games that simulate club dance, I always take my shoes off before going on the dance floor, my Vegeta socks drive the ladies wild.

But yes, It's actually quite insane that I am a little bit of a pariah at the arcade because I play without the handrails and look relatively good doing it -- I say "relatively" because I am a 400-pound neckbeard who slides across the panels as though I am some sentient goo.

The techs hate when I come in, they know they're gonna have to clean the cheese powder off the pad when I leave.  I think they just need to be more accepting of who I am.  How else am I going to play these games at the highest level without the nutritional value of Cool Ranch Doritos?

I just want you all to know that co-operative mode in Pump It Up is the high point of our civilization.



Understand that this excellent genre of alleged videogames and alleged dancing may not appeal to Farkers because it requires basic human skills like "not getting exhausted because you walked from the front door to your car", but you can take confidence that my findings are genuine.

Consider that most people do not even know there is a Doubles mode, where you play both sides of the board, and then they come up with this idea that you create a dance team and you share the entire board -- multiple people play Doubles at the same time -- you even get bonus points for saying "You got served!" at the end of the song.

I think the reason I enjoy this mode so much is because there is this thing in videogaming where you blame your noob allies for costing the match, and now I can do this in my cutting-edge fake dancing simulators.  What the hell were red and blue even thinking, hitting the notes in a substandard fashion?

I really wanted to post a video of someone playing this, but turns out that Dance Dance Revolution and Pump It Up players are physically incapable of having enough balance to play these games without the use of the metal handrails behind the dance controller, it is legitimately embarrassing and I do not wish to give them publicity.

Imagine playing these games with the safety bar when you could be playing them with two long sticks, one in each arm, as you smack the buttons with the sticks in order to achieve the full combo.  Degenerates.  The whole lot of 'em.