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(IGN)   Conan, what is good in life? To crush your enemies, see them driven to watch my new Netflix show, and to hear the lamentation of their women   (ign.com) divider line
    More: Spiffy, Robert E. Howard's Conan stories, new series, Conan Properties International, live-action, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Howard's iconic Conan tales, Conan series, breakout role  
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1761 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 01 Oct 2020 at 7:55 AM (3 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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2020-10-01 7:24:32 AM  
Hopefully it's in musical form.

Conan the Barbarian: The Musical (Arnold Schwarzenegger)
Youtube OBGOQ7SsJrw
 
2020-10-01 7:59:09 AM  
Chew it slowly. It's the good stuff.
 
2020-10-01 8:00:52 AM  
One of my guiltiest of pleasure movies is Conan the Barbarian.

It's such an excellent script, with great music, and a cast that was absolutely perfect down to the last extra in the second orgy scene.

I can't wait to be as disappointed in the franchise as I am with everything else in comparison to that movie.
 
2020-10-01 8:02:56 AM  
I thought Conan O'Brien was moving what's left of his show to Netflix.
 
2020-10-01 8:03:07 AM  
TFA mentions ahnuld reprising the role, playing Conan as king of aquilonia.  Yes.

When I was a kid I tore through all of the Conan books, I always loved Conan of aquilonia.

I tried watching the new Conan with Aquaman but it was....not so good.
 
2020-10-01 8:06:09 AM  

Tchernobog: I tried watching the new Conan with Aquaman but it was....not so good.


I liked it's aesthetic. But the writing was bad.
 
2020-10-01 8:09:05 AM  

Night Train to Wakanda: Tchernobog: I tried watching the new Conan with Aquaman but it was....not so good.

I liked it's aesthetic. But the writing was bad.


I mean, it's a Conan story, y'know?   You expect it to be at least a little bad because it's friggin Conan, but that movie was just awful.
 
2020-10-01 8:09:57 AM  
Red Nails? Hour of The Dragon? There's a reason the original REH stuff holds up, but I'm not holding my breath that this won't be shiatty original scripts like every other adaptation.
 
2020-10-01 8:10:56 AM  
They're all sluts! He's dead already!
 
2020-10-01 8:19:58 AM  
Conan the Destroyer was like a Monty Python film compared to Conan the Barbarian.
 
2020-10-01 8:23:25 AM  
Just give me a King Conan movie with Arnold. Stop trying to reboot it. None of the versions since the first have been good.
 
2020-10-01 8:26:49 AM  
I would get a netflix subscription to see faithful enactments of the original stories with appropriate tweaks for a visual medium (how to externalize thoughts, memories, and perceptions).
 
2020-10-01 8:31:08 AM  

Tchernobog: TFA mentions ahnuld reprising the role, playing Conan as king of aquilonia.  Yes.

When I was a kid I tore through all of the Conan books, I always loved Conan of aquilonia.

I tried watching the new Conan with Aquaman but it was....not so good.


Same with the books as a kid. Have you ever read them as an adult? I've never gone back to read again and wonder if they hold up.
 
2020-10-01 8:33:37 AM  

thisispete: Hopefully it's in musical form.

[iFrame https://www.youtube.com/embed/OBGOQ7Ss​Jrw?autoplay=1&widget_referrer=https%3​A%2F%2Fwww.fark.com&start=0&enablejsap​i=1&origin=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.fark.com&​widgetid=1]


Arrr arhrhght arrr ARRR aaarrrrr arrrrarghya!
 
2020-10-01 8:36:43 AM  
I want a spinoff featuring Subotai.  Best character in the film.
 
2020-10-01 8:41:11 AM  

CarnySaur: I thought Conan O'Brien was moving what's left of his show to Netflix.


Same.
 
2020-10-01 8:41:16 AM  

thisispete: Hopefully it's in musical form.

[Youtube-video https://www.youtube.com/embed/OBGOQ7Ss​Jrw]


I just hope they have a few of these scenes (only nipples below are male)

images.propstore.comView Full Size
 
2020-10-01 8:45:45 AM  

rudemix: Tchernobog: TFA mentions ahnuld reprising the role, playing Conan as king of aquilonia.  Yes.

When I was a kid I tore through all of the Conan books, I always loved Conan of aquilonia.

I tried watching the new Conan with Aquaman but it was....not so good.

Same with the books as a kid. Have you ever read them as an adult? I've never gone back to read again and wonder if they hold up.


They do and don't. It's harder to overlook the racist stuff I could just ignore as a kid (I loved H Rider Haggard as well), and Conan does get conveniently knocked out a lot. But the atmosphere is still great and they are still ripping yarns.
 
2020-10-01 8:46:10 AM  

rudemix: Tchernobog: TFA mentions ahnuld reprising the role, playing Conan as king of aquilonia.  Yes.

When I was a kid I tore through all of the Conan books, I always loved Conan of aquilonia.

I tried watching the new Conan with Aquaman but it was....not so good.

Same with the books as a kid. Have you ever read them as an adult? I've never gone back to read again and wonder if they hold up.


I haven't and honestly I think my parents probably got rid of them when I moved out.  Every once in a while I think about checking used bookstores for copies, because they're ridiculously expensive on Amazon, I've just never gotten around to it.  I would like to read them again though, it has probably been 20 years since the last time I did.
 
2020-10-01 8:47:32 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-10-01 8:47:42 AM  

KarmicDisaster: thisispete: Hopefully it's in musical form.

[iFrame https://www.youtube.com/embed/OBGOQ7Ss​Jrw?autoplay=1&widget_referrer=https%3​A%2F%2Fwww.fark.com&start=0&enablejsap​i=1&origin=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.fark.com&​widgetid=1]

Arrr arhrhght arrr ARRR aaarrrrr arrrrarghya!


Great now I have Arnold singing Lady gaGA's Bad Romance in my head.
 
2020-10-01 8:51:23 AM  

Night Train to Wakanda: One of my guiltiest of pleasure movies is Conan the Barbarian.

It's such an excellent script, with great music, and a cast that was absolutely perfect down to the last extra in the second orgy scene.

I can't wait to be as disappointed in the franchise as I am with everything else in comparison to that movie.


How does liking a great movie that many other people like and has been aped by the industry for decades make it a "guilty pleasure?"
 
2020-10-01 9:02:18 AM  

Tchernobog: rudemix: Tchernobog: TFA mentions ahnuld reprising the role, playing Conan as king of aquilonia.  Yes.

When I was a kid I tore through all of the Conan books, I always loved Conan of aquilonia.

I tried watching the new Conan with Aquaman but it was....not so good.

Same with the books as a kid. Have you ever read them as an adult? I've never gone back to read again and wonder if they hold up.

I haven't and honestly I think my parents probably got rid of them when I moved out.  Every once in a while I think about checking used bookstores for copies, because they're ridiculously expensive on Amazon, I've just never gotten around to it.  I would like to read them again though, it has probably been 20 years since the last time I did.


Are you that poor?
Link
 
2020-10-01 9:04:27 AM  

sleze: thisispete: Hopefully it's in musical form.

[Youtube-video https://www.youtube.com/embed/OBGOQ7Ss​Jrw]

I just hope they have a few of these scenes (only nipples below are male)

[images.propstore.com image 850x362]


Uhhh
 
2020-10-01 9:04:45 AM  

BafflerMeal: Night Train to Wakanda: One of my guiltiest of pleasure movies is Conan the Barbarian.

It's such an excellent script, with great music, and a cast that was absolutely perfect down to the last extra in the second orgy scene.

I can't wait to be as disappointed in the franchise as I am with everything else in comparison to that movie.

How does liking a great movie that many other people like and has been aped by the industry for decades make it a "guilty pleasure?"


This. The only thing that could have been done better was the giant snake, but other than that the movie is perfect.
 
2020-10-01 9:13:53 AM  

batlock666: BafflerMeal: Night Train to Wakanda: One of my guiltiest of pleasure movies is Conan the Barbarian.

It's such an excellent script, with great music, and a cast that was absolutely perfect down to the last extra in the second orgy scene.

I can't wait to be as disappointed in the franchise as I am with everything else in comparison to that movie.

How does liking a great movie that many other people like and has been aped by the industry for decades make it a "guilty pleasure?"

This. The only thing that could have been done better was the giant snake, but other than that the movie is perfect.


Conan the barbarian was the first bluray I bought after I got a ps3.

/the second was Highlander
 
2020-10-01 9:17:39 AM  

sleze: thisispete: Hopefully it's in musical form.

[Youtube-video https://www.youtube.com/embed/OBGOQ7Ss​Jrw]

I just hope they have a few of these scenes (only nipples below are male)

[images.propstore.com image 850x362]


that scene has one of my favorite musical themes.  as much of a williams/goldsmith fanboy that I am, Pouledoris really knocked this soundtrack out of the park.
 
2020-10-01 9:25:15 AM  

rudemix: Tchernobog: TFA mentions ahnuld reprising the role, playing Conan as king of aquilonia.  Yes.

When I was a kid I tore through all of the Conan books, I always loved Conan of aquilonia.

I tried watching the new Conan with Aquaman but it was....not so good.

Same with the books as a kid. Have you ever read them as an adult? I've never gone back to read again and wonder if they hold up.


They do. There's a reason they helped invent a genre and are still published almost 100 years later.
 
2020-10-01 9:26:36 AM  

NeoCortex42: Just give me a King Conan movie with Arnold. Stop trying to reboot it. None of the versions since the first have been good.


Speak for yourself... I want to see actual adaptations of Howard stories instead of completely random stories with one (maybe two) of Howard's characters. I want to see a young and savage barbarian making a living as a thief in Numalia and Zamoria. I want to see him growing into a more commanding presence with Belit, committing piracy along the Black Coast. I'd definitely like to see adaptations of A Witch Shall Be Born, People of the Black Circle, and Red Nails (my favorite Howard stories).

The first Arnold movie was a thoroughly enjoyable and well-made sword-and-sorcery film. And it wasn't a bad fit after an entire generation had grown up reading the Marvel comics. But compared to the original Howard stories? It had little, if anything, to do with the actual character of Conan the Cimmerian.
 
2020-10-01 9:26:44 AM  

drewogatory: Red Nails? Hour of The Dragon? There's a reason the original REH stuff holds up, but I'm not holding my breath that this won't be shiatty original scripts like every other adaptation.


Watching Lovecraft Country, I am convinced Jordan Peele should be given the keys to the REH Kingdom, he and Lovecraft weren't all that different at their core
 
2020-10-01 9:29:23 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-10-01 9:36:13 AM  

thisispete: Hopefully it's in musical form.

[iFrame https://www.youtube.com/embed/OBGOQ7Ss​Jrw?autoplay=1&widget_referrer=https%3​A%2F%2Fwww.fark.com&start=0&enablejsap​i=1&origin=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.fark.com&​widgetid=1]


I am laughing out loud here! Thank you, Pete!
 
2020-10-01 9:39:22 AM  

drewogatory: Red Nails? Hour of The Dragon? There's a reason the original REH stuff holds up, but I'm not holding my breath that this won't be shiatty original scripts like every other adaptation.


Red Nails, such a good story. I really wish the animated movie of that would have taken off. Perlman was supposed to voice Conan IIRC.

Hour of the Dragon, I had my fathers worn out paperback of that and I think I have read it at least 20 times in my life.
 
2020-10-01 9:45:21 AM  

You Are All Sheep: sleze: thisispete: Hopefully it's in musical form.

[Youtube-video https://www.youtube.com/embed/OBGOQ7Ss​Jrw]

I just hope they have a few of these scenes (only nipples below are male)

[images.propstore.com image 850x362]

that scene has one of my favorite musical themes.  as much of a williams/goldsmith fanboy that I am, Pouledoris really knocked this soundtrack out of the park.


It is considered to be one of the finest soundtracks of all time.
 
2020-10-01 9:49:05 AM  

Night Train to Wakanda: One of my guiltiest of pleasure movies is Conan the Barbarian. It's such an excellent script, with great music, and a cast that was absolutely perfect down to the last extra in the second orgy scene. I can't wait to be as disappointed in the franchise as I am with everything else in comparison to that movie.



Me too, and I make it a point to eat my popcorn out of a skull shaped candy bowl.
 
2020-10-01 9:57:29 AM  

drewogatory: rudemix: Tchernobog: TFA mentions ahnuld reprising the role, playing Conan as king of aquilonia.  Yes.

When I was a kid I tore through all of the Conan books, I always loved Conan of aquilonia.

I tried watching the new Conan with Aquaman but it was....not so good.

Same with the books as a kid. Have you ever read them as an adult? I've never gone back to read again and wonder if they hold up.

They do and don't. It's harder to overlook the racist stuff I could just ignore as a kid (I loved H Rider Haggard as well), and Conan does get conveniently knocked out a lot. But the atmosphere is still great and they are still ripping yarns.


A lot of those old series like Conan and Elric still hold up as long as you keep in mind while you are reading them that you are reading pulp fiction (not the movie) where the author was paid by the word. Go in with that mindset and the stories are just as entertaining.

Sometimes even more so, I am currently rereading Michael moorcock's and Von Beck series where the titular hero realizes the hard way that he has always been one of Lucifer's own and is given a chance to get out from under that burden. A very nice philosophical look at the Morning Star and an interesting take on how hell has manifested under his tutelage.
 
2020-10-01 9:58:49 AM  

Susan'sLittleAdamsApple: KarmicDisaster: thisispete: Hopefully it's in musical form.

[iFrame https://www.youtube.com/embed/OBGOQ7Ss​Jrw?autoplay=1&widget_referrer=https%3​A%2F%2Fwww.fark.com&start=0&enablejsap​i=1&origin=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.fark.com&​widgetid=1]

Arrr arhrhght arrr ARRR aaarrrrr arrrrarghya!

Great now I have Arnold singing Lady gaGA's Bad Romance in my head.


Every once in awhile I will psychologically torture my ten-year-old son by queuing up the YouTube Supercut of Arnold's 160 greatest one-liners and hiding the phone somewhere where he can't reach it.

I firmly maintain that I am the greatest dad in the history of fatherhood but he may disagree with me.
 
2020-10-01 9:59:19 AM  

Marcos P: Conan the Destroyer was like a Monty Python film compared to Conan the Barbarian.


I think it was my first bad sequel experience. Like, wtf is this shiat?
 
2020-10-01 10:01:27 AM  

CarnySaur: I thought Conan O'Brien was moving what's left of his show to Netflix.


Now I want to see Conan The Barbarian starring Conan O' Brien and everything is played completely straight. Honestly I'd me more likely to watch that than this.
 
2020-10-01 10:02:20 AM  
I thought Conan, along with Dracula, were Marvel properties.
 
2020-10-01 10:04:18 AM  

Bluenosed Baker: I thought Conan, along with Dracula, were Marvel properties.


Marvel has comic publishing rights to Conan. I don't think they own the character completely. They certainly don't own Dracula.
 
2020-10-01 10:07:06 AM  
Well, you've all convinced me to pull my old books out of storage and reread them again.
It's probably been 30 years since I've read em, but I still hung on to them. Being a pack rat pays!
 
2020-10-01 10:08:51 AM  

SuperChuck: Bluenosed Baker: I thought Conan, along with Dracula, were Marvel properties.

Marvel has comic publishing rights to Conan. I don't think they own the character completely. They certainly don't own Dracula.


https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Conan_t​h​e_Barbarian#Copyright_and_trademark_di​spute

No one owns Dracula. It's over 120 years old.
 
2020-10-01 10:09:47 AM  

rudemix: Tchernobog: TFA mentions ahnuld reprising the role, playing Conan as king of aquilonia.  Yes.

When I was a kid I tore through all of the Conan books, I always loved Conan of aquilonia.

I tried watching the new Conan with Aquaman but it was....not so good.

Same with the books as a kid. Have you ever read them as an adult? I've never gone back to read again and wonder if they hold up.


I didn't read any of the original Howard stories as a kid. I didn't pick them up until age 37 or so... I was frustrated with incomplete modern fantasy series, and wanted to read something that was as finished as it would ever be. Plus, I found good ePubs for all of them on the Roy Glashan library.

Personally, I enjoyed them quite a bit even as an adult. Howard's writing, pacing, and plotting is excellent. They are DEFINITELY products of their time in racial terms, and 90% of the damsels-in-distress are cookie cutter. But even some of the "damsels" end up saving Conan, and a few like Belit and Valeria are pretty damn awesome for 1930s pulp female characters.
 
2020-10-01 10:14:48 AM  

thisispete: Hopefully it's in musical form.

[YouTube video: Conan the Barbarian: The Musical (Arnold Schwarzenegger)]


Thank you! How did I know know about this? I bought an actual CD of Silence! (of the lambs, a musical) back in the late 90s, my lady friend got me loaded and took me to Musical Thrones: a Game of Thrones musical parody a couple of years ago. I never drew the line that these were the same guys behind those works and didn't know about this YouTube channel. fark yeah, I'd watch a Conan musical.
 
2020-10-01 10:22:58 AM  

Michael J Faux: [Fark user image 500x678]


Well. That took an unexpected turn.
 
2020-10-01 10:27:35 AM  
Animated?

media1.giphy.comView Full Size
 
2020-10-01 10:32:38 AM  
FFS, if you're gonna do this, stick to the stories. Don't write your own. There's more than enough source material to do them right, verbatim, instead of stealing bits & pieces to reassemble as a new work.

mybluemake: thisispete: Hopefully it's in musical form.

[YouTube video: Conan the Barbarian: The Musical (Arnold Schwarzenegger)]

Thank you! How did I know know about this? I bought an actual CD of Silence! (of the lambs, a musical) back in the late 90s, my lady friend got me loaded and took me to Musical Thrones: a Game of Thrones musical parody a couple of years ago. I never drew the line that these were the same guys behind those works and didn't know about this YouTube channel. fark yeah, I'd watch a Conan musical.


If you haven't encountered them already, check out the H.P. Lovecraft Historical Society, and their musical, "A Shoggoth on the Roof."
 
2020-10-01 10:35:20 AM  

Night Train to Wakanda: One of my guiltiest of pleasure movies is Conan the Barbarian.

It's such an excellent script, with great music, and a cast that was absolutely perfect down to the last extra in the second orgy scene.

I can't wait to be as disappointed in the franchise as I am with everything else in comparison to that movie.


Why should it be a "guilty pleasure" movie if it's got an excellent script, great music, and perfect casting?
 
2020-10-01 10:35:36 AM  
They absolutely HAVE to get the rights to use the soundtrack / score from the estate of Basil Poledouris. It flipping MADE that movie.

/my mom went to high school with Basil
//my wife and I have long agreed that if we ever win Powerball we are going to have Conan made into an opera
 
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