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(Stat News)   Do these cognitive enhancement pills I've been taking make me any smarter? Maybe I should buy them again and see if I'm able to answer that question   ( divider line
    More: Facepalm, Food and Drug Administration, supplement aisle, smart drugs, Pieter Cohen, counter brain supplements, unapproved drugs, Dietary supplement, unapproved pharmaceutical drugs  
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747 clicks; posted to Fandom » on 24 Sep 2020 at 11:18 PM (16 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook

Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2020-09-25 1:10:51 AM  
8 votes:

eurotrader: The ads for pills to improve memory that has spokespeople that don't remember how long they have been taking them is a classic example of their target market.

Seems that this old couple are having trouble remembering things, so they sign up for a memory course. The course is wonderful and introduces them to a technique called word/name association. They come home and tell all their relatives, friends, and neighbors about it.

Some months later, a neighbor approaches the man as he tends the garden.
"Say, Ed, what was the name of the instructor of that memory course you liked so much?"
"Well, it was...hmmm...let me think a minute... What's the name of that flower, you know, the one that smells so nice, but has thorns on the stems...?"

"You mean a rose?"
"Yeah, that's it...(shouting toward house) Hey, Rose, what was the memory course instructor's name?
2020-09-24 10:18:01 PM  
8 votes:
i.pinimg.comView Full Size
2020-09-24 10:00:40 PM  
7 votes:
Fark user imageView Full Size
2020-09-24 9:50:10 PM  
6 votes:
Fark user imageView Full Size
2020-09-24 11:39:49 PM  
5 votes:
I never finished "Flowers for Algernon".  I assume it ended well.
2020-09-25 12:07:49 AM  
3 votes:
Ad: Buy our Smart Pills! Just sign up we will send you some pills every month, and the first month supply is free! Cancel anytime!
*2nd month's bill for $199 comes*

Biz: Thank you for calling Smart Pills!
Mark: I want to cancel my Smart Pills
Biz: Aw, why? They didn't work? Still stupid?
Mark: Uh, no, its not that, its uh too
Biz: Expensive?
Mark: Yeah
Biz: Thats not a valid reason to cancel a contractual obligation, Mark.
Mark: Ok so right. They didn't work. I'm stupid.
Biz: Still?
Mark: Just cancel my orders, please.
Biz: I'm going to need that in writing, Mark. Im going to need you to mail in a letter stating that The pills don't work and you are still stupid. And I'm going to need a doctor to write that letter, Mark. Then we will cancel your orders, no problem. Are you ready for the address to send the letter?
Mark: Forget it
Biz: Smart man! See? They DO work!
2020-09-25 4:52:41 AM  
2 votes:

bk3k: Did subby RTFA?  They don't address if the products work.  What they are addressing is the presence of drugs that aren't approved in the US, and in some cases several times more than is commonly approved where they are used.

Now what would be even more useful?  Listing what the products are that contain unlisted and/or incorrectly metered drugs.  They don't do that.  The linked study doesn't do that in either the abstract or the full pdf.  "Be wary of these products" but we won't tell you specifically what to be weary of...  yes very useful guys.

Maybe they intended to, but forgot?  Are they testing these pills on themselves?

That also happens when they periodically test diet pills, they find some have added certain illegal substances, but they'll never tell you which ones. This is a shame since the ones with the illegal substances are the ones you want to buy as they are the only ones which will do anything.
2020-09-24 8:55:16 PM  
2 votes:
subby sounds like he needs boner pills.
2020-09-24 11:36:32 PM  
1 vote:
A friend died from a strange brain disease that affects a few hundred people on Earth after taking some of these for a few years.

Yeah, correlation isn't causation, but what are the odds?
2020-09-24 10:47:23 PM  
1 vote:

themindiswatching: subby sounds like he needs boner pills.

Are you sure his arm has the stamina to deal with that?
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