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(The New York Times)   What Can I Say to the 'QAnon Mom' Next Door? How 'bout NO   (nytimes.com) divider line
    More: Survey, Ohlone, Native Americans in the United States, Human trafficking, Twitter, White people, Conspiracy theory, Anna Wintour's former assistant, mundane absence  
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1302 clicks; posted to Politics » on 18 Sep 2020 at 7:14 PM (4 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



58 Comments     (+0 »)
 
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2020-09-18 1:57:09 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-09-18 2:17:46 PM  
I don't know, is she cute? Cute enough that you forget that she's a crazy person?
 
2020-09-18 4:13:06 PM  
Show her the place where it all got started. The "Politically Incorrect" board on 4chan. Give her the red pill.
 
2020-09-18 4:34:15 PM  
I'd say let her know she's an unAmerican piece of sh*t and you won't allow yourself and your children to have anything to do with her filth-spewing mouth.
 
2020-09-18 4:40:07 PM  
say you've got a bridge for sale.
 
2020-09-18 4:52:16 PM  
i1.wp.comView Full Size

/Fill the bottle with cat urine
 
2020-09-18 6:22:14 PM  
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2020-09-18 7:16:48 PM  
Don't argue with her.  Just get even.  Fark her dad.
 
Azz [TotalFark]
2020-09-18 7:16:59 PM  
How about a Stone Cold Stunner followed by a chokeslam through the Spanish announce table
 
2020-09-18 7:20:32 PM  
Incredulously proclaim "You believe that shiat! WOW!"
Walk away laughing.
Meet any calls or responses by them as you are walking away with laughter.

Repeat for each encounter.

They will either stop talking to you (high probability) or rethink their idiocy (low probability).

Either way, WIN!
 
2020-09-18 7:21:21 PM  
Come up with even crazier conspiracy theories than she spouts but make sure they all just happen revolve around her b-hole in specific.
 
2020-09-18 7:21:37 PM  
If you burn her house down, she won't live next door anymore.

Just sayin'.
 
2020-09-18 7:21:37 PM  

iheartscotch: I don't know, is she cute? Cute enough that you forget that she's a crazy person?


That's the kind of crazy you fark at her place, sneak out in the middle of the night, then fake your own death and move to another country.
 
2020-09-18 7:22:04 PM  
Expose her to my "everything that hates America is Aum Shinrikyo", conspiracy theory.

Or give me a random prompt and I'll come up with a new conspiracy theory to distract her with.

There's no curing people of conspiracy brain, you can only redirect the mind to a different conspiracy theory to chew on.
 
2020-09-18 7:23:20 PM  
Call her a farking idiot and walk away.
 
2020-09-18 7:23:39 PM  
So, try listening. Ask her to walk you through the proof of her allegations. Perhaps you can help her see (gently) that she believes these dangerous lies because she wants to - not because she has any evidence for them.

I anticipate this working about as well as banging your head against a wall.  They are cultists.  Evidence, or lack there of, will not convince them.  They will not leave until they choose to get out.
 
2020-09-18 7:25:04 PM  
Next time you host a child blood orgy, invite them over.
 
2020-09-18 7:25:05 PM  
"Toadstools are delicious!"
 
2020-09-18 7:25:21 PM  
It's possible to distract her with romance.
https://www.conspiracydate.com/

Perhaps she'll birth a bunch of kids who grow up to hate conspiracy theorists. Or move away into her boyfriend's place.

My mom is a Trumpanzee and I hate her.
 
2020-09-18 7:25:27 PM  
Play a loop of Trump saying things and then immediately contradicting himself.
 
2020-09-18 7:26:56 PM  
Walk away and never speak to her again.  And if you don't feel that advice is correct, feel free to ask here:

https://www.reddit.com/r/QAnonCasualt​i​es/

While you are at it, read some of the horror stories.  There are some interesting ones about Qanon cultists taking non-cultist family members on an "outing" and trying to indoctrinate them, while using all the classic brainwashing techniques.

There are dangerous.  Do not waste your time explaining anything to them.

Before this is over, they are going to go the way of Jim Jones followers, and they will try to take as many people as possible with them.
 
2020-09-18 7:27:02 PM  

aleister_greynight: So, try listening. Ask her to walk you through the proof of her allegations. Perhaps you can help her see (gently) that she believes these dangerous lies because she wants to - not because she has any evidence for them.

I anticipate this working about as well as banging your head against a wall.  They are cultists.  Evidence, or lack there of, will not convince them.  They will not leave until they choose to get out.


This is correct. Don't debate. Steamroll. No matter what she says just assume she's wrong and keep talking. E.g.

"I'm going to get a flu vaccine. Have you gotten yours yet?"
"Vaccines are from the devil."
"Since vaccines are obviously a good idea just think about getting one soon."
"They're going to put a microchip in you."
"Well, off to get my flu vaccine. Hope you get yours soon."
 
2020-09-18 7:27:37 PM  
My suggestion for what to say to ANY follower of QAnon. . .

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-09-18 7:28:33 PM  
I really should make business cards and offer my services as a conspiracy theorist wrangler.

They'll listen to me for I am also a conspiracy theorist and I have nice boobs. People will listen just because of the boobs.
 
2020-09-18 7:28:58 PM  
How to talk to Qtards?

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-09-18 7:29:03 PM  
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2020-09-18 7:29:21 PM  
This is one where, as an introvert, I don't understand extroverts. I mean, even if she's the neighbor, do you HAVE to talk to her? You can just... not... talk to her. What am I missing here?
 
2020-09-18 7:30:50 PM  
Who talks to their neighbors?
 
2020-09-18 7:31:34 PM  
Child rearing is part of the NWO conspiracy and Sterilisation is the only way to make the chips in the forced vaccines malfunction.

Prove me wrong
 
2020-09-18 7:31:37 PM  
Maybe don't offer her any of your adrenalchrome that was drained from kidnapped, molested children.

...Or do.
 
2020-09-18 7:32:12 PM  
Start throwing live rats over her fence. In a week or so, upgrade to possums.
 
2020-09-18 7:36:27 PM  
"Have you ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight?"
 
2020-09-18 7:39:13 PM  
I dunno dude are you single? Beggars can't be choosers.
 
2020-09-18 7:39:19 PM  

I'm an Egyptian!: I'd say let her know she's an unAmerican piece of sh*t and you won't allow yourself and your children to have anything to do with her filth-spewing mouth.


This. Insult her and call her a:

Slimy
Conniving
Un-American
Moocher
 
2020-09-18 7:42:46 PM  
Qanon is a conspiracy theory invented by the Kremlin to prey on American's good natures.

Deep down she wants to protect kids.

Covid-19 causes stillbirths.

The Kremlin works with Russian Aum Shinrikyo cultists to spread Covid-19 in America. They want to kill us all.

The Disney corporation is assisting the Kremlin's murderous agenda by opening Walt Disney World.

Fark user imageView Full Size
Trump, Betsy DeVos, Churches that are against masks, all witting or unwitting Aum Shinrikyo

Putin is running The Dulles Plan conspiracy theory in reverse. Does rainbow ice cream effect your sexuality? Vladimir Putin thinks it does.

Rainbow ice cream doesn't make you gay but it is symbolic of American soft power. Sugar farmed without slave labor, strong agriculture, domestic animals, artificial colors from an understanding of chemistry, lead free water, refrigeration technology: Putin wants us to have none of this!

Either of these two conspiracy theories, 1 Aum Shinrikyo, 2 Reverse Dulles, have enough meat to busy a bored conspiracy theorist.

Or you could fire away with FW:FW:FW: DONALD J TRUMP IS THE REAL SECRET MUSLIM!!!!

Because the evidence for that one is findable.
 
2020-09-18 7:43:29 PM  

NM Volunteer: Don't argue with her.  Just get even.  Fark her dad.


Beekeeping Dads | Rick and Morty | adult swim
Youtube Zp0N5PJxamE
 
2020-09-18 7:44:50 PM  
Slice her head off and throw it down a well, just to be sure.
 
2020-09-18 7:45:21 PM  
Use weed killer to paint "Q is watching you" on her lawn.
 
2020-09-18 7:50:14 PM  
Like a good neighbor, stay over there.
 
2020-09-18 7:50:30 PM  
find a new friend.

there are plenty of them out there.
 
2020-09-18 7:52:38 PM  
No XKCD?  You Farkers are slipping.  😕
 
2020-09-18 7:54:06 PM  

JerkStore: Use weed killer to paint "Q is watching you" on her lawn.


This is the only antagonistic suggestion that might have a positive impact.

In fact, when you play along with a conspiracy theorist, you gain power over them.

Learn a little of the conspiracy theory, parrot it back to the target. Present as a believer. Then gradually inject dissent.

That sleeper agent method is only worthwhile for someone you're trapped with and being landlocked next to a Qanon might be such a situation.

I've used the method on my Trumpanzee mom and since she believes I'm a Trump supporter I don't have to worry about her poisoning my food or pushing me down some stairs, she confides in me and she trusts me. I have power over her now.

Since she thinks I like Trump, she'll actually hear me out when I complain about Vladimir Putin. That has had some small success in demoralizing her about Trump.

She's barely speaking to my openly liberal sister now and wants to adjust her will to leave me some shiat I don't want.
 
2020-09-18 7:54:40 PM  

Arachnophobe: [Fark user image image 425x193]


I prefer "4chan nostradamus"
 
2020-09-18 8:10:07 PM  

Purple_Urkle: I really should make business cards and offer my services as a conspiracy theorist wrangler.

They'll listen to me for I am also a conspiracy theorist and I have nice boobs. People will listen just because of the boobs.


Conspiracy theortits can be quite powerful.
 
2020-09-18 8:48:16 PM  
no use in fighting it, just feed them crazier conspiracies.

The planets are being projected on a giant tv screen because Soros and the lizard people relocated Earth to their secret hive to begin the next phase of infiltration and universal daily enemas. They are, through, Big Pharma,  hiding the fact that consuming your own dung (only when you are 18 or older) can lead not only to curing of all diseases but also double the human lifespan and prolong youth. The lizard people are also pushing the Vegan agenda to dilute these powers, the fecal meal reaches full potential when a steady diet of pure raw meat and deep fried candy bars.
 
2020-09-18 9:18:59 PM  
Qanon - because even flat-earthers need someone to laugh at.
 
2020-09-18 9:27:02 PM  

Imaginativescreenname: no use in fighting it, just feed them crazier conspiracies.

The planets are being projected on a giant tv screen because Soros and the lizard people relocated Earth to their secret hive to begin the next phase of infiltration and universal daily enemas. They are, through, Big Pharma,  hiding the fact that consuming your own dung (only when you are 18 or older) can lead not only to curing of all diseases but also double the human lifespan and prolong youth. The lizard people are also pushing the Vegan agenda to dilute these powers, the fecal meal reaches full potential when a steady diet of pure raw meat and deep fried candy bars.


Just pick one and expand on it to busy them. It helps if there is some evidence that can be bent to fit.

Like the politicians are space aliens one. I thought that was baloney until I met a politician who never had wisdom teeth, doesn't sweat, walks strangely and is naturally blonde. I think she's a Tall White. She lost the election though.

She doesn't meet all the criteria of a Tall White though, 1 she eats meat, 2 she's malicious not benevolent 3 she's kinda short 4 she prefers cold weather to hot weather

But just the lack of wisdom teeth and lack of sweat coupled with the pale skinned nordic attributes makes me wonder if she's part alien.

You don't need to go heavy on the outrageous details. It's most effective if it overwhelmingly mundane things with a sprinkling of strangeness for intrigue.

The example of the alien conspiracy theory working on me is to demonstrate how going light on details can still hook someone.

/am a non-qanon conspiracy theorist,
 
2020-09-18 10:05:50 PM  
I mean, I agree that generally, just stop talking to her.

But if you've got time to kill and have the energy, just pump her full of alternate theories taken from movies and TV. I'd use "Rick & Morty," that alien movie with Charlie Sheen (The Arrival) and ... Battlestar Galactica. Cylons! She'll lose her shiat trying to figure out who the real humans are.
 
2020-09-18 10:10:53 PM  
My sister fell down the QAnon rabbit hole. I tried reasoning with her once and she told me I was on the side of the cannibal pedophiles. I kicked her and her family out of my house and cut her out of my life completely and don't feel one bit of regret doing it.
 
2020-09-18 11:08:45 PM  
I read a Buzzfeed article about this, and all joking aside, I feel deep sympathy for people who have to put up with this shiat. It really does sound like an addiction. Or, as I've suggested, mental illness. Not sure if addiction is considered a kind of mental illness or not.
 
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