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(AP News)   Best Korea may be about to conduct an underwater-launched missile test. At this point L'il Kim's pretty much gone full-on Bond villain. He's got to have a secret volcano lair somewhere   (apnews.com) divider line
    More: Obvious, North Korea, Kim Jong-il, South Korea, ballistic missile test, Kim Il-sung, Korean War, Korean language, Nuclear weapon  
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655 clicks; posted to Main » on 16 Sep 2020 at 9:25 AM (2 days ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



42 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2 days ago  
Funny you should mention that....

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Paektu_​M​ountain
 
2 days ago  
So, he's going to skip the middleman and blow up the ocean directly?
 
2 days ago  
Him or his sister?  He may be dead... Donnie says he isn't, so he probably is.
 
2 days ago  
How is that Bond-villain?

"The world's first operational nuclear-poweredballistic missile submarine(SSBN) wasUSSGeorge Washington(SSBN-598)with 16Polaris A-1missiles, which entered service in December 1959 and conducted the first SSBN deterrent patrol November 1960 - January 1961.George Washingtonalso conducted the first successful submerged SLBM launch with a Polaris A-1 on 20 July 1960."

Seems like a pretty normal thing for a nuclear power to do.
 
2 days ago  
Did poseidon fark his girlfriend or something? Cause he is royally pissed off at the sea.
 
2 days ago  
th.bing.comView Full Size
 
2 days ago  
Don't you traditionally use a submarine for that?
 
2 days ago  

Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: So, he's going to skip the middleman and blow up the ocean directly?


After decades of fending off the Pacific with rocket attacks, North Korea will not rest until they defeat their sworn enemy.
 
2 days ago  
What a horrible monster!  He has the same weapons as us!  This is an outrage!
 
2 days ago  
In your war with the sea you may as well skip the air
 
2 days ago  
Who needs a volcano when you have a whole country?
 
2 days ago  
i thought they accidentally blew up the secret volcano lair a few years ago
 
2 days ago  
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Virgini​a​-class_submarine


I think we'll be ok even against the norks fearsome towed submersible barges.
 
2 days ago  

Alphax: Him or his sister?  He may be dead... Donnie says he isn't, so he probably is.


He has to at least be significantly incapacitated, if not dead outright, yes? Otherwise they'd have already gotten him out in front of cameras in a way that dispelled all doubts, not that one hinky inconclusive "appearance"-which could have been old footage or a body double-and then nothing after.

I wonder what sort of nutballs shenanigans are going on behind that border. At least here in the states we afford the world the courtesy of putting our nutballs shenanigans on full display for all to see.
 
2 days ago  

Marcus Aurelius: Don't you traditionally use a submarine for that?


it depends how sure you are that it will work...
if you arent very confident then you just put it in a capsule (either the dry launch capsule that would be in the launch tube, or a launch tube replica) and float it at the right depth.  that way if your engineering sucks (<cough> north korea) and it blows up immediately you don't lose a submarine.
 
2 days ago  

Alphax: Him or his sister?  He may be dead... Donnie says he isn't, so he probably is.


He was on state TV recently.

Since they would choose a double that would make look like he had trouble walking, which he had, then it must have been the real deal. And it couldn't be stock footage, since it was about current flooding.
 
2 days ago  

Alphax: Him or his sister?  He may be dead... Donnie says he isn't, so he probably is.


https://www.startrek.com/database_art​i​cle/landru
 
2 days ago  

Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: So, he's going to skip the middleman and blow up the ocean directly?


Fark user imageView Full Size

"We'll blow up the ocean!"
 
2 days ago  
It's hard to miss a target from point blank range, it's impossible to miss your target from inside of it
 
2 days ago  

Marcus Aurelius: Don't you traditionally use a submarine for that?


Works best if you have a sub the enemy can't detect.  Norks only have targets.
 
2 days ago  

OldJames: It's hard to miss a target from point blank range, it's impossible to miss your target from inside of it


I've known some people who couldn't hit a barn from the inside, as the saying goes.
 
2 days ago  
"Our plan to fire a missile underwater to a designated target hundreds of miles away was a complete success!"

"It worked?"

"The part where we didn't have to photoshop anything because nobody could tell if we actually fired anything or not? Yes, it worked!"
 
2 days ago  

Turbo Cojones: Marcus Aurelius: Don't you traditionally use a submarine for that?

Works best if you have a sub the enemy can't detect.  Norks only have targets.


i mean lets be realistic here.  the NKs have 2 reliable nuclear delivery vehicles that can hit the US western seaboard.
yacht and shipping container.
 
2 days ago  

Turbo Cojones: Marcus Aurelius: Don't you traditionally use a submarine for that?

Works best if you have a sub the enemy can't detect.  Norks only have targets.


They have taken enforced regime change by the US off the table, job done and the rest is R&D the same as everyone else. Assuming cold ejection the sub isn't really at risk anyway, as that's why it's used for subs.
 
2 days ago  
For some reason I initially read that as "underwear-launched", and it made just as much sense.
 
2 days ago  

oopsboom: Turbo Cojones: Marcus Aurelius: Don't you traditionally use a submarine for that?

Works best if you have a sub the enemy can't detect.  Norks only have targets.

i mean lets be realistic here.  the NKs have 2 reliable nuclear delivery vehicles that can hit the US western seaboard.
yacht and shipping container.


Shipping containers get scanned.
 
2 days ago  

g.fro: oopsboom: Turbo Cojones: Marcus Aurelius: Don't you traditionally use a submarine for that?

Works best if you have a sub the enemy can't detect.  Norks only have targets.

i mean lets be realistic here.  the NKs have 2 reliable nuclear delivery vehicles that can hit the US western seaboard.
yacht and shipping container.

Shipping containers get scanned.


which is a little late if your goal is to nuke the port
 
2 days ago  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2 days ago  

oopsboom: g.fro: oopsboom: Turbo Cojones: Marcus Aurelius: Don't you traditionally use a submarine for that?

Works best if you have a sub the enemy can't detect.  Norks only have targets.

i mean lets be realistic here.  the NKs have 2 reliable nuclear delivery vehicles that can hit the US western seaboard.
yacht and shipping container.

Shipping containers get scanned.

which is a little late if your goal is to nuke the port


plus you could probably bullshiat that if you really tried.  like put a nuke in a airtight container in a lead container in a say a giant granite carved statue for a fountain or something.  and then have a US company buy it and fake a shipping bill from china.  they do have the resources of a nation to work on this after all.
 
2 days ago  

oopsboom: oopsboom: g.fro: oopsboom: Turbo Cojones: Marcus Aurelius: Don't you traditionally use a submarine for that?

Works best if you have a sub the enemy can't detect.  Norks only have targets.

i mean lets be realistic here.  the NKs have 2 reliable nuclear delivery vehicles that can hit the US western seaboard.
yacht and shipping container.

Shipping containers get scanned.

which is a little late if your goal is to nuke the port

plus you could probably bullshiat that if you really tried.  like put a nuke in a airtight container in a lead container in a say a giant granite carved statue for a fountain or something.  and then have a US company buy it and fake a shipping bill from china.  they do have the resources of a nation to work on this after all.


but on second though if i was going to do that i'd do it twice.  the first time into mexico, then with a completely different set of paperwork into the US.  that way it would obscure the back trail and also be much less likely to get caught.
 
2 days ago  

Dwedit: Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: So, he's going to skip the middleman and blow up the ocean directly?

[Fark user image 850x613]
"We'll blow up the ocean!"


Not today, Blue Laser!

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2 days ago  

oopsboom: g.fro: oopsboom: Turbo Cojones: Marcus Aurelius: Don't you traditionally use a submarine for that?

Works best if you have a sub the enemy can't detect.  Norks only have targets.

i mean lets be realistic here.  the NKs have 2 reliable nuclear delivery vehicles that can hit the US western seaboard.
yacht and shipping container.

Shipping containers get scanned.

which is a little late if your goal is to nuke the port


You think they wait until they're in the port?
 
2 days ago  
th.bing.comView Full Size

OOps
 
2 days ago  
His lair isn't secret. It's a replica of the Cheesecake Factory.
 
2 days ago  

g.fro: oopsboom: g.fro: oopsboom: Turbo Cojones: Marcus Aurelius: Don't you traditionally use a submarine for that?

Works best if you have a sub the enemy can't detect.  Norks only have targets.

i mean lets be realistic here.  the NKs have 2 reliable nuclear delivery vehicles that can hit the US western seaboard.
yacht and shipping container.

Shipping containers get scanned.

which is a little late if your goal is to nuke the port

You think they wait until they're in the port?


um, yea.  what wizardry do you think happens?  i mean sure if you just have a block of farking plutonium right out there for god and everyone to see maybe.  but if its shielded and you get your rad counts down to a reasonable level its almost certainly going to make it all the way onto dock and over to xray.
 
2 days ago  

Pharmdawg: His lair isn't secret. It's a replica of the Cheesecake Factory.


dude have you seen his fat ass?  its not a replica.  its an actual cheesecake factory.
 
2 days ago  
Best Korea may be about to conduct an underwater-launched missile test

So....
He's gonna shiat in a pool?
 
2 days ago  
This makes sense, they have had an experimental ballistic missile sub in the water since 2014, they eventually need to put missiles on it or it is kinda worthless.
 
2 days ago  

oopsboom: g.fro: oopsboom: g.fro: oopsboom: Turbo Cojones: Marcus Aurelius: Don't you traditionally use a submarine for that?

Works best if you have a sub the enemy can't detect.  Norks only have targets.

i mean lets be realistic here.  the NKs have 2 reliable nuclear delivery vehicles that can hit the US western seaboard.
yacht and shipping container.

Shipping containers get scanned.

which is a little late if your goal is to nuke the port

You think they wait until they're in the port?

um, yea.  what wizardry do you think happens?  i mean sure if you just have a block of farking plutonium right out there for god and everyone to see maybe.  but if its shielded and you get your rad counts down to a reasonable level its almost certainly going to make it all the way onto dock and over to xray.


I'm not going to get into the details of port security on line, but trust me when I say that whatever you think up, someone has already thought of. I'm going to go out on a limb and guess only one of us has worked on a container ship, so unless you have some experience in intermodal transportation, please stop.
 
2 days ago  

g.fro: oopsboom: g.fro: oopsboom: g.fro: oopsboom: Turbo Cojones: Marcus Aurelius: Don't you traditionally use a submarine for that?

Works best if you have a sub the enemy can't detect.  Norks only have targets.

i mean lets be realistic here.  the NKs have 2 reliable nuclear delivery vehicles that can hit the US western seaboard.
yacht and shipping container.

Shipping containers get scanned.

which is a little late if your goal is to nuke the port

You think they wait until they're in the port?

um, yea.  what wizardry do you think happens?  i mean sure if you just have a block of farking plutonium right out there for god and everyone to see maybe.  but if its shielded and you get your rad counts down to a reasonable level its almost certainly going to make it all the way onto dock and over to xray.

I'm not going to get into the details of port security on line, but trust me when I say that whatever you think up, someone has already thought of. I'm going to go out on a limb and guess only one of us has worked on a container ship, so unless you have some experience in intermodal transportation, please stop.


Oh yeah? Well what about snakes on a plane?
 
2 days ago  

EdgeRunner: g.fro: oopsboom: g.fro: oopsboom: g.fro: oopsboom: Turbo Cojones: Marcus Aurelius: Don't you traditionally use a submarine for that?

Works best if you have a sub the enemy can't detect.  Norks only have targets.

i mean lets be realistic here.  the NKs have 2 reliable nuclear delivery vehicles that can hit the US western seaboard.
yacht and shipping container.

Shipping containers get scanned.

which is a little late if your goal is to nuke the port

You think they wait until they're in the port?

um, yea.  what wizardry do you think happens?  i mean sure if you just have a block of farking plutonium right out there for god and everyone to see maybe.  but if its shielded and you get your rad counts down to a reasonable level its almost certainly going to make it all the way onto dock and over to xray.

I'm not going to get into the details of port security on line, but trust me when I say that whatever you think up, someone has already thought of. I'm going to go out on a limb and guess only one of us has worked on a container ship, so unless you have some experience in intermodal transportation, please stop.

Oh yeah? Well what about snakes on a plane?


I don't know, I don't work in aviation.

Look, I'm not saying it's not a threat. I'm saying it's a threat that is taken very seriously and there are many measures in place to mitigate that threat. Just regular dangerous goods are a potential hazard, as Beirut showed in a worst-case-scenario way.  The point is, there are people who think about this stuff and come up with counter-measures.
 
2 days ago  

peachpicker: Alphax: Him or his sister?  He may be dead... Donnie says he isn't, so he probably is.

He has to at least be significantly incapacitated, if not dead outright, yes? Otherwise they'd have already gotten him out in front of cameras in a way that dispelled all doubts, not that one hinky inconclusive "appearance"-which could have been old footage or a body double-and then nothing after.

I wonder what sort of nutballs shenanigans are going on behind that border. At least here in the states we afford the world the courtesy of putting our nutballs shenanigans on full display for all to see.


The longer it goes on without a new head cheese or an unambiguous appearance the more I lean toward alive, but significantly disabled.  Maybe a stroke as a complication from the surgery.  The various would-be successors are probably trying to position themselves without drawing too much attention from rivals, fanatical loyalists, and the potentially unstable fat sociopath himself.  Maybe someone will do a "Death of Stalin" style movie/comic about the infighting and backstabbing one day.
 
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