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(Deadline)   The next Fast and Furious film will have a female writer, thanks to Michelle Rodriguez   (deadline.com) divider line
    More: Spiffy, Woman, Girl, Gender, Michelle Rodriguez, female writer, Female, people, girl power  
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357 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 11 Sep 2020 at 7:42 AM (7 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2020-09-11 7:45:59 AM  
They'll stop to ask for directions I bet.
 
2020-09-11 7:46:01 AM  
Fast and Furious films have writers?!
 
2020-09-11 7:55:45 AM  

EyeballKid: Fast and Furious films have writers?!


Yeah this.  It's all just:

Driver stomps on pedal
Driver shifts
(Repeat)
 
2020-09-11 7:58:25 AM  

EyeballKid: Fast and Furious films have writers?!


Maybe they mean the person who writes the closed captions?
 
2020-09-11 8:12:10 AM  

enry: EyeballKid: Fast and Furious films have writers?!

Yeah this.  It's all just:

Driver stomps on pedal
Driver shifts
(Repeat)


It's about family.
 
2020-09-11 8:13:25 AM  
I'm rewatching Lost and I totally forgot she was in that, and how awesome she was.
 
2020-09-11 8:14:33 AM  
I heard that Paul Walker quit smoking.
 
2020-09-11 8:29:07 AM  
It's great to see women make strides in mediocrity like this.
 
2020-09-11 8:37:46 AM  

EyeballKid: Fast and Furious films have writers?!


I assumed that the first couple did.  Then they just fed those scripts into one of those AI screenwriting bots with added hints like "put the rock in it", and "more Jason Statham" the the rest of the franchise.

It's the only possible explanation.
 
2020-09-11 8:47:25 AM  
The Ed Hardy shirt of movie franchises.
 
2020-09-11 8:48:21 AM  
Losers pay for the abortions?
 
2020-09-11 8:51:23 AM  

dryknife: I heard that Paul Walker quit smoking.


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-09-11 8:57:52 AM  
This shiat is the call of duty of movies.
 
2020-09-11 9:01:42 AM  
Literally the only thing that could make these movies worse is having more Michelle Rodriguez involved in their creation.
 
2020-09-11 9:19:07 AM  
I kind of dig Michelle, but you know, I'd settle for a good writer, regardless of what's twixt their legs.
 
2020-09-11 9:22:23 AM  

JerkStore: Literally the only thing that could make these movies worse is having more Michelle Rodriguez involved in their creation.


Now I want a maximum Rodriguez F&F movie. Rodriguez writes! She directs! She plays every character! She gives everyone piggyback rides as she pretends to be all the cars! Every line of dialogue is "Michelle Rodriguez!" The only way to see it is to go to Michelle Rodriguez's house, where she projects the movie onto her forehead and gives running commentary the entire time!

It'll be like the "Malkovich Malkovich," scene in Being John Malkovich, only much more Rodriguez Rodriguez Rodriguez.
 
2020-09-11 9:27:01 AM  
how many times will they look in the rear view mirror to apply make-up?
 
2020-09-11 9:30:06 AM  

EdgeRunner: EyeballKid: Fast and Furious films have writers?!

Maybe they mean the person who writes the closed captions?


*vroom*
*tire squeal*
*vroom*
*crumple plastic/metal*
"WE'RE NOT GOING TO MAKE IT!"
"Oh yes we will..."
*scraping sound*


That'll be $120000 please.  I'm not greedy.
 
2020-09-11 9:35:56 AM  

Pinko_Commie: EyeballKid: Fast and Furious films have writers?!

I assumed that the first couple did.  Then they just fed those scripts into one of those AI screenwriting bots with added hints like "put the rock in it", and "more Jason Statham" the the rest of the franchise.

It's the only possible explanation.


To be fair. more Statham and less Diesel is a good plan. Vin is the worst part of the MI:F&F flicks.
 
2020-09-11 9:45:26 AM  

RogueWallEnthusiast: EdgeRunner: EyeballKid: Fast and Furious films have writers?!

Maybe they mean the person who writes the closed captions?

*vroom*
*tire squeal*
*vroom*
*crumple plastic/metal*
"WE'RE NOT GOING TO MAKE IT!"
"Oh yes we will..."
*scraping sound*

That'll be $120000 please.  I'm not greedy.


Oh, you think it's THAT easy? There's at least twenty more Os in "vroom". Vin Diesel pours his all into these movies!

/unless you ask the Rock. He has a differing opinion about that.
 
2020-09-11 9:48:07 AM  
All they are doing is leveling their gear, after all.
With a little PvP thrown in.
 
2020-09-11 10:06:54 AM  

drewogatory: Pinko_Commie: EyeballKid: Fast and Furious films have writers?!

I assumed that the first couple did.  Then they just fed those scripts into one of those AI screenwriting bots with added hints like "put the rock in it", and "more Jason Statham" the the rest of the franchise.

It's the only possible explanation.

To be fair. more Statham and less Diesel is a good plan. Vin is the worst part of the MI:F&F flicks.


What???

He's the patriarch of La Familia!!!

This makes him pretty much the patron saint of film diversity, according to online writers who are looking for reasons to suck up to these horrible movies.
 
2020-09-11 10:26:39 AM  
Today Now! Interviews The 5-Year-Old Screenwriter Of "Fast Five"
Youtube iIY5b1JMvGs
 
2020-09-11 10:33:00 AM  
Vin: Floor it!

Ludacris: I'll blow the cams!

Michelle: When I brought the car to the mechanic last time, I was alone. I had fully prepared for the condescension that comes with being a female enthusiast, but this was something else entirely...are you guys still listening?
 
2020-09-11 10:41:15 AM  
And they turned down my script?  Hackers threaten to take over global computers so they assemble Dom's team once more to do what no one else can do...drive high speed internet.  Yes, Fast and the Furious Breaks The Internet with special racer Vanellope played by Sarah Silverman bringing her character to live action.  It is testosterone fueled, CGI overloaded, trash talking...this is the script that would make Michael Bay wake up in a cold sweat yelling What What.  One scene has the family driving through virtual Amazon which would cause the movie to be split up into not two movies, not three movies, NINE movies just for ask the crazy over the top driving mayhem just inside that online store.  And just because I happen to have a notclit, they pass me over.   Oh, I probably should not have penned it in crayon but I was afraid Vin Diesel had the right to refuse scripts so I wanted to make it easy on him.
 
2020-09-11 10:52:46 AM  

Tyrone Slothrop: It's great to see women make strides in mediocrity like this.


If this is sarcastic, it shouldn't be.  It's true!  If women and minority writers only get representation on art house, multi-inter-sectional, gender-queer, prestige dramas, then it's not really doing anything to change Hollywood to make it more inclusive.  You're just building a rubber room to keep the trouble makers away.  Chicks gotta be able to write schlock.
 
2020-09-11 10:58:02 AM  
I look at these films like the Mission Impossible films:  they're garbage, but they're well made and entertaining garbage.  They are insane, not plausible, and very dumb, but they entertain.
 
2020-09-11 11:05:36 AM  

Nuuu: Chicks gotta be able to write schlock.


Stephanie Meyer says she's available if the paycheck's right.
 
2020-09-11 11:26:29 AM  
I heard this will be the movie where the cars go to space.
 
2020-09-11 11:31:22 AM  

dryknife: I heard that Paul Walker quit smoking.


Took him long enough, that shiat is bad for you.
 
2020-09-11 11:47:47 AM  

OkieDookie: I heard this will be the movie where the cars go to space.


Pshaw.  They drive UP a rocket that GOES into space.
 
2020-09-11 12:44:38 PM  

mjbok: I look at these films like the Mission Impossible films:  they're garbage, but they're well made and entertaining garbage.  They are insane, not plausible, and very dumb, but they entertain.


I think garbage is too harsh.  Stupid mindless fun sums it up better.  The fast food of film.
 
2020-09-11 1:28:02 PM  

EdgeRunner: JerkStore: Literally the only thing that could make these movies worse is having more Michelle Rodriguez involved in their creation.

Now I want a maximum Rodriguez F&F movie. Rodriguez writes! She directs! She plays every character! She gives everyone piggyback rides as she pretends to be all the cars! Every line of dialogue is "Michelle Rodriguez!" The only way to see it is to go to Michelle Rodriguez's house, where she projects the movie onto her forehead and gives running commentary the entire time!

It'll be like the "Malkovich Malkovich," scene in Being John Malkovich, only much more Rodriguez Rodriguez Rodriguez.


So Michelle Rodriguez Resident Evil?
 
2020-09-11 1:57:08 PM  

bhcompy: EdgeRunner: JerkStore: Literally the only thing that could make these movies worse is having more Michelle Rodriguez involved in their creation.

Now I want a maximum Rodriguez F&F movie. Rodriguez writes! She directs! She plays every character! She gives everyone piggyback rides as she pretends to be all the cars! Every line of dialogue is "Michelle Rodriguez!" The only way to see it is to go to Michelle Rodriguez's house, where she projects the movie onto her forehead and gives running commentary the entire time!

It'll be like the "Malkovich Malkovich," scene in Being John Malkovich, only much more Rodriguez Rodriguez Rodriguez.

So Michelle Rodriguez Resident Evil?


No, I really want the All Michelle Rodriguez Fast & Furious. I want to see piggy back races on waxed floors so she can show off her drifting skills.
 
2020-09-11 2:19:59 PM  
Nobody's gonna talk about the mention of there being a space scene?
As in outer space?
 
2020-09-11 2:20:36 PM  

NeoCortex42: enry: EyeballKid: Fast and Furious films have writers?!

Yeah this.  It's all just:

Driver stomps on pedal
Driver shifts
(Repeat)

It's about family.


It is about family and by the end of Act One, Dom finds an excuse to ditch them for alone time.
 
2020-09-11 2:22:36 PM  

Joey Jo Jo Jr Shabadu: mjbok: I look at these films like the Mission Impossible films:  they're garbage, but they're well made and entertaining garbage.  They are insane, not plausible, and very dumb, but they entertain.

I think garbage is too harsh.  Stupid mindless fun sums it up better.  The fast food of film.


Yeah, strangely F&F isn't offensive to me the way other brainless movies are. It knows what it is, doesn't pretend to be otherwise, and delivers on its low-maintenance promises.  Hell, that level of consistency is almost admirable.

Terminator sequels and ghostbusters reboots and Robocop prequels - that's the shiat that's depressing.
 
2020-09-11 2:22:41 PM  

Joey Jo Jo Jr Shabadu: I think garbage is too harsh.  Stupid mindless fun sums it up better.  The fast food of film.


I checked out after the 2nd one and still haven't seen Tokyo Drift, but I caught the 4th one on HBO or something and it was fun.  On the fifth one they bought into the silliness and it has just escalated from there.  A battle between a sub and cars?  Why not.  Driving cars between buildings 100 stories in the air, why not?

I love how they went went DVD player thieves to international super spies.

They're dumb, but fun.  Your fast food thing is pretty much right on.
 
2020-09-11 2:42:19 PM  

Snatch Bandergrip: Joey Jo Jo Jr Shabadu: mjbok: I look at these films like the Mission Impossible films:  they're garbage, but they're well made and entertaining garbage.  They are insane, not plausible, and very dumb, but they entertain.

I think garbage is too harsh.  Stupid mindless fun sums it up better.  The fast food of film.

Yeah, strangely F&F isn't offensive to me the way other brainless movies are. It knows what it is, doesn't pretend to be otherwise, and delivers on its low-maintenance promises.  Hell, that level of consistency is almost admirable.

Terminator sequels and ghostbusters reboots and Robocop prequels - that's the shiat that's depressing.


It's like Jackie Chan movies or Fury Road.  The fun is the inventiveness of the practical stunts.
 
2020-09-11 3:30:07 PM  
Snatch Bandergrip:

Terminator sequels

I finally got around to watching Dark Fate. I was pleasantly surprised how good it turned out.
 
2020-09-11 4:28:43 PM  

Bslim: Snatch Bandergrip:

Terminator sequels

I finally got around to watching Dark Fate. I was pleasantly surprised how good it turned out.


It wasn't bad, but it wasn't good.  I guess that's better than some of them which were aggressively bad.
 
2020-09-11 4:34:51 PM  

mjbok: Bslim: Snatch Bandergrip:

Terminator sequels

I finally got around to watching Dark Fate. I was pleasantly surprised how good it turned out.

It wasn't bad, but it wasn't good.  I guess that's better than some of them which were aggressively bad.


What's bizarre about Dark Fate is it was supposed to replace the ones that were aggressively bad, but it ended up being a lazy repeat of many of their plot points. It's nowhere near as good as the Sarah Connor Chronicles, and I'd argue it isn't even as good as Terminator III.

And Terminator III wasn't good.
 
2020-09-11 4:50:33 PM  

EdgeRunner: mjbok: Bslim: Snatch Bandergrip:

Terminator sequels

I finally got around to watching Dark Fate. I was pleasantly surprised how good it turned out.

It wasn't bad, but it wasn't good.  I guess that's better than some of them which were aggressively bad.

What's bizarre about Dark Fate is it was supposed to replace the ones that were aggressively bad, but it ended up being a lazy repeat of many of their plot points. It's nowhere near as good as the Sarah Connor Chronicles, and I'd argue it isn't even as good as Terminator III.

And Terminator III wasn't good.


Terminator 3 at least felt like it was in the same universe, which the ones after it lost.  Besides that the end of T3 redeems the entire movie.  Seeing judgement day actually happen was shocking to me.
 
2020-09-11 4:54:57 PM  

mjbok: EdgeRunner: mjbok: Bslim: Snatch Bandergrip:

Terminator sequels

I finally got around to watching Dark Fate. I was pleasantly surprised how good it turned out.

It wasn't bad, but it wasn't good.  I guess that's better than some of them which were aggressively bad.

What's bizarre about Dark Fate is it was supposed to replace the ones that were aggressively bad, but it ended up being a lazy repeat of many of their plot points. It's nowhere near as good as the Sarah Connor Chronicles, and I'd argue it isn't even as good as Terminator III.

And Terminator III wasn't good.

Terminator 3 at least felt like it was in the same universe, which the ones after it lost.  Besides that the end of T3 redeems the entire movie.  Seeing judgement day actually happen was shocking to me.


That final twist does redeem a lot, and it gave the movie a real purpose to exist. None of the movies that followed, including Dark Fate, ever needed to be made.
 
2020-09-11 5:04:16 PM  

EdgeRunner: mjbok: EdgeRunner: mjbok: Bslim: Snatch Bandergrip:

Terminator sequels

I finally got around to watching Dark Fate. I was pleasantly surprised how good it turned out.

It wasn't bad, but it wasn't good.  I guess that's better than some of them which were aggressively bad.

What's bizarre about Dark Fate is it was supposed to replace the ones that were aggressively bad, but it ended up being a lazy repeat of many of their plot points. It's nowhere near as good as the Sarah Connor Chronicles, and I'd argue it isn't even as good as Terminator III.

And Terminator III wasn't good.

Terminator 3 at least felt like it was in the same universe, which the ones after it lost.  Besides that the end of T3 redeems the entire movie.  Seeing judgement day actually happen was shocking to me.

That final twist does redeem a lot, and it gave the movie a real purpose to exist. None of the movies that followed, including Dark Fate, ever needed to be made.


If you made a franken-movie of parts of all of the other sequels you might be able to come up with one decent movie, but I doubt it.
 
2020-09-11 5:17:44 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
Michelle Rodriguez, you say ...
 
2020-09-11 5:18:05 PM  

mjbok: If you made a franken-movie of parts of all of the other sequels you might be able to come up with one decent movie, but I doubt it.


I thought that's exactly what they did with Dark Fate. Take the liquid metal-coated endoskeleton and the finale-critical explosive power cells from 3, the "I'm Sarah Connor, come with me if you want to live" moment from 5, the human turned into a Terminator-like cyborg from 4, and smear it all over the original movie.

What they came up with wasn't the worst Terminator movie (4 is just too hard to beat), but it was totally unnecessary and offered nothing new. It might have the worst action scenes though. I can't remember any of them.
 
2020-09-11 7:55:11 PM  

Zul the Magnificent: [Fark user image 400x584]Michelle Rodriguez, you say ...


Thank you for being the only non-Godless communist heathen in the thread.
 
2020-09-11 10:16:20 PM  

Tyrone Slothrop: It's great to see women make strides in mediocrity like this.


Honestly, it is a good thing.
 
2020-09-11 10:33:29 PM  

Snatch Bandergrip: Terminator sequels and ghostbusters reboots and Robocop prequels - that's the shiat that's depressing.


they would be fine of they got better writers and directors.

/ shakes fist at the  like Pacific Rim sequel
 
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