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(WPXI.com)   Perform a reading at Mass? That's a punching   (wpxi.com) divider line
    More: Strange, Philadelphia's archbishop, Eucharist, Catholic Church, Bishop, Roman Catholic Church, PHILADELPHIA, Roman Missal, Pope  
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3013 clicks; posted to Main » on 24 Aug 2020 at 1:05 PM (13 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



39 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2020-08-24 11:10:07 AM  
It's Philly, not surprising.
 
2020-08-24 12:30:43 PM  
"Woman punched after giving reading at Philadelphia church"

I honestly thought that's how a Philly sermon is supposed to go
 
2020-08-24 1:01:23 PM  

Walker: It's Philly, not surprising.


Hey, now, this here is a Quaker town.  We respect churches.

/and that's about all we respect
 
2020-08-24 1:07:50 PM  
Must not have been a popular passage.
 
2020-08-24 1:08:20 PM  
Let him (or her) without sin throw the first punch.
 
2020-08-24 1:09:04 PM  
Just continuing an old tradition, apparently.  When Jesus gave his first reading at his hometown synagogue in Nazareth, the congregation tried to throw him off a cliff.
 
2020-08-24 1:09:13 PM  
I vote to rename it the Church of the Holy Right Cross.
 
2020-08-24 1:09:53 PM  
She wasn't wearing a mask.
 
2020-08-24 1:10:05 PM  
Bet it was one of those two Corinthians.
 
2020-08-24 1:11:09 PM  
Were they holding the service at a Waffle House?

pyxis.nymag.comView Full Size
 
2020-08-24 1:12:39 PM  
A Leviticus literalist?
 
2020-08-24 1:12:46 PM  
No one could be bothered to provide the thing being read, right? That's some mighty fine reporting there, Lou.
 
2020-08-24 1:15:34 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-24 1:17:36 PM  
Philadelphia is the city of brotherly love, not sisterly. Duh.
 
2020-08-24 1:17:40 PM  
Laying on of hands?
 
2020-08-24 1:17:49 PM  

Larva Lump: No one could be bothered to provide the thing being read, right? That's some mighty fine reporting there, Lou.


Yeah, imma go out on a limb and guess that the reading offended a Fox news viewer.
 
2020-08-24 1:18:59 PM  

Larva Lump: No one could be bothered to provide the thing being read, right? That's some mighty fine reporting there, Lou.


Looks like Isaiah, Psalms, Romans, and Matthew (though the priest or deacon would have read the gospel).  Nothing too inflammatory.

https://bible.usccb.org/bible/reading​s​/082320.cfm
 
2020-08-24 1:20:03 PM  
Shebna's fanbase must be REALLY pissed, especially when Eliakim replaced him as Steward.
 
2020-08-24 1:20:28 PM  
Farking asshole
 
2020-08-24 1:22:20 PM  
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/Reading, Mass., get it?
 
2020-08-24 1:22:28 PM  
She probably shouldn't have kept pausing to brag how she banged the other woman's husband.
 
2020-08-24 1:26:35 PM  

Herr Morgenstern: Philadelphia is the city of brotherly love, not sisterly. Duh.


You can love your brother and still whoop his ass from time to time.
 
2020-08-24 1:27:39 PM  
And they'll know we are Christians by our love
 
2020-08-24 1:33:30 PM  
Whose menu was it?

Fark user imageView Full Size
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-24 1:37:52 PM  

Lady Beryl Ersatz-Wendigo: Larva Lump: No one could be bothered to provide the thing being read, right? That's some mighty fine reporting there, Lou.

Looks like Isaiah, Psalms, Romans, and Matthew (though the priest or deacon would have read the gospel).  Nothing too inflammatory.

https://bible.usccb.org/bible/readings​/082320.cfm


Perhaps it was this passage?

" Thus says the LORD to Shebna, master of the palace:
"I will thrust you from your office
and pull you down from your station.
On that day I will summon my servant
Eliakim, son of Hilkiah;
I will clothe him with your robe,
and gird him with your sash,
and give over to him your authority.
He shall be a father to the inhabitants of Jerusalem,
and to the house of Judah."

And the puncher thought it was in reference to Trump?
 
2020-08-24 1:43:40 PM  

Billy Liar: Laying on of hands?


Paladins are the worst
 
2020-08-24 1:44:13 PM  
FTA:

"The lector who was assaulted received immediate attention and assistance from cathedral staff members off camera," Archbishop Nelson Perez wrote on Facebook. She did not require medical attention, he said.
The suspect was not detained.

Really, they just allowed him to leave with no repercussions?  In a lot of places he would have gotten an ass whipping.
 
2020-08-24 1:45:49 PM  

Harlee: Lady Beryl Ersatz-Wendigo: Larva Lump: No one could be bothered to provide the thing being read, right? That's some mighty fine reporting there, Lou.

Looks like Isaiah, Psalms, Romans, and Matthew (though the priest or deacon would have read the gospel).  Nothing too inflammatory.

https://bible.usccb.org/bible/readings​/082320.cfm

Perhaps it was this passage?

" Thus says the LORD to Shebna, master of the palace:
"I will thrust you from your office
and pull you down from your station.
On that day I will summon my servant
Eliakim, son of Hilkiah;
I will clothe him with your robe,
and gird him with your sash,
and give over to him your authority.
He shall be a father to the inhabitants of Jerusalem,
and to the house of Judah."

And the puncher thought it was in reference to Trump?


I made the Shebna Superfan joke above, but I didn't think someone would think it refer to Orange Guy.

Then again, we have mainstream QAnon and 2020.....
 
2020-08-24 1:53:09 PM  

Latinwolf: FTA:

"The lector who was assaulted received immediate attention and assistance from cathedral staff members off camera," Archbishop Nelson Perez wrote on Facebook. She did not require medical attention, he said.
The suspect was not detained.

Really, they just allowed him to leave with no repercussions?  In a lot of places he would have gotten an ass whipping.


Maybe it was a crazy stinky homeless person that wandered in and no one wanted to touch them?
 
2020-08-24 2:01:29 PM  
Hardly a real punch at all.
 
2020-08-24 2:17:00 PM  
There are some "Pre-Vatican II" Catholics who REALLY hate the idea of a woman on the Altar (keep in min Vat II was 63, so these guy are REALLY dying off these days) women have been giving readings and handing out communion at least since I was a kid in the 70's (Hell you don't even have to be Catholic to be a lector Ted Koppel  was a regular (OT readings only though) at his wife's church in Bethesda  Md in the 80's-an 90's)

My mom gave out communion when I was a kid and was crushed when people would loudly and obviously change communion lines when they got close and saw she was a woman. But on day after mass a kindly priest in our parish and older gentleman (he looked exactly like the guy who played Kris Kringle in Miracle on 34th street)  who'd come to the priesthood late in life from a previous career whispered in her ear.   "That's okay, in my last job we shot line-crossers" .  Turns out he'd been a covert operative for the CIA before becoming a priest
 
2020-08-24 2:21:42 PM  
...and that church has three bouncers.

/Yo, it's a tough neighborhood.
 
2020-08-24 2:28:30 PM  
Huh. I was the lector for Mass at my church yesterday morning and proclaimed those very readings.

Did not get punched.

That was farking weird. Why in the world didn't someone stop her?
 
2020-08-24 2:33:18 PM  

Publikwerks: She wasn't wearing a mask.


Looks like the puncher's nose was exposed, too.
 
2020-08-24 2:50:08 PM  
Alice Cooper cosplay has Gone too far
 
2020-08-24 3:18:19 PM  

pdieten: Why in the world didn't someone stop her?


around 20 centuries of women being treated like crap by that institution.
They may need some sensitivity training or you know, SHUT THE F*CK DOWN

because you know, around 20 centuries of women being treated like crap by that institution.
around 20 centuries of child rape.
around 20 centuries of torture
around 20 centuries of stealing valuables from natives.
 
2020-08-24 3:29:55 PM  

vudukungfu: pdieten: Why in the world didn't someone stop her?

around 20 centuries of women being treated like crap by that institution.
They may need some sensitivity training or you know, SHUT THE F*CK DOWN

because you know, around 20 centuries of women being treated like crap by that institution.
around 20 centuries of child rape.
around 20 centuries of torture
around 20 centuries of stealing valuables from natives.


This is the short version

Christopher Hitchens on the Catholic Church
Youtube LddfXoNb5Iw
 
2020-08-24 4:48:26 PM  

Latinwolf: FTA:

"The lector who was assaulted received immediate attention and assistance from cathedral staff members off camera," Archbishop Nelson Perez wrote on Facebook. She did not require medical attention, he said.
The suspect was not detained.

Really, they just allowed him to leave with no repercussions?  In a lot of places he would have gotten an ass whipping.


Well, he had breasts so they were confused.
 
2020-08-25 8:15:26 PM  
Those were terrible punches. Her feet weren't set, no hip turn. How did she expect to generate any power?
 
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