Skip to content
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Wired)   People would take heatwaves more seriously if the heatwaves were named. Hades heatwave?   (wired.com) divider line
    More: Obvious, Weather, monstrous heat wave, named hurricanes, heat wave, heat indexes, Tropical cyclone, part of the Climate Desk collaboration, important thing  
•       •       •

734 clicks; posted to Politics » on 16 Aug 2020 at 8:35 PM (23 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



52 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all

 
2020-08-16 6:20:31 PM  
Laissez-fail 1 2020, Laissez-fail 2 2020, Laissez-fail 3 2020,...
 
2020-08-16 7:00:56 PM  
I'll allow naming them, as long as they're all named Heavens to Betsy.
 
2020-08-16 7:12:24 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-16 7:37:30 PM  
would you start with Martha or Vandella?

or better yet, let this silly-ass naming thing thrust upon us by the weather channels blow itself out.
 
2020-08-16 7:54:31 PM  
This past month has had so much hot stuff that I propose we call it the Donna Summer.
 
2020-08-16 7:57:53 PM  
What are they going to call the plagues?
 
2020-08-16 8:32:06 PM  
Number of Americans who froze to death in 2019: At least 21 (as of 2/1/19)

Number of Americans who hotted to death in 2019: 6 (according to this woke, global warming stooge columnist)

/But freezing to death doesn't advance the global warming agenda; so health experts, climate scientists, and policymakers are desperately trying to reframe the story in ways that allow them to control the narrative (and, in many cases continue to collect a fat paycheck) by scaring you with fear, uncertainty and doubt.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-16 8:39:00 PM  
Because naming every storm front to blow through all winter long was totally useful, now we need to expand that?
 
2020-08-16 8:40:36 PM  
COVID-19 has many names, and not a single one of them has helped anybody in this goddamn country take it seriously.
 
2020-08-16 8:41:28 PM  

neongoats: Because naming every storm front to blow through all winter long was totally useful, now we need to expand that?


If by "more useful" you mean "gets more eyeballs on our paid advertising", then probably, yes.
 
2020-08-16 8:42:18 PM  

mjjt: What are they going to call the plagues?


If our response to Covid is any indication, "another hoax".
 
2020-08-16 8:42:39 PM  
Don't think of it as the hottest summer ever, think of it as the coolest summer of the next 25 years.
 
2020-08-16 8:46:29 PM  
It's not the name, it's the fact that no matter what is happening, pandemic, war, heat wave, hurricane, Americans can't acknowledge anything other than normal. "Gotta keep doing the same thing we always do!", even if it kills them.

This is of course how it needs to be, because the capitalist system has been pushed to the point where any little hiccup that will ruin a person will also make billionaires numbers go up slightly slower. And we've farking falling for it. The dollar and the myth of an American work ethic is more religion than religion - and we're still getting raped by these new priests.
 
2020-08-16 8:47:53 PM  
I will take him home and love him and pet him and hug him and call him George.
 
2020-08-16 8:48:28 PM  
Name heatwaves after edged weapons and cutting tools.

Convey the danger.
Climate change murders the future.
 
2020-08-16 8:48:31 PM  

cyberspacedout: This past month has had so much hot stuff that I propose we call it the Donna Summer.


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-16 8:50:43 PM  
Yall slipping:

Martha Reeves & The Vandellas ~ Heat Wave (1963)
Youtube 5k0GDQrK2jo
 
2020-08-16 8:55:14 PM  
I'm gonna call this current one the 'Hang Low Heat Wave'

/Penis
//Balls
///Add them together and it makes 3 for a 3rd slashie
 
2020-08-16 8:57:47 PM  

Mole Man: Yall slipping:

[YouTube video: Martha Reeves & The Vandellas ~ Heat Wave (1963)]


I'm torn between whether we should name the first heatwave Buster Poindexter or Robert Smith.

Buster Poindexter - Hot Hot Hot
Youtube EhZba-P7R18
 
2020-08-16 8:58:30 PM  
I guess that when the heat dries out the topsoil microbes that convert nutrients into something plants can eat, all the vegetation will die, and people will take them seriously then. Right?
 
2020-08-16 8:59:32 PM  
That's as dumb as naming winter storms, so of course someone suggests doing it.
 
2020-08-16 9:01:31 PM  
How seriously should I take these heatwaves? They better have respectable names at least. "Heatwave Karen"? Gtfo
 
2020-08-16 9:03:50 PM  
Haha.  Hardly nobody died from the heatwaves, thanks to Donald Trump.
 
2020-08-16 9:04:01 PM  

Wasilla Hillbilly: How seriously should I take these heatwaves? They better have respectable names at least. "Heatwave Karen"? Gtfo


Well if you leave it up to NASA is it will have a name with at least one apostrophe and twelve vowels like ʻOumuamua so if you're an early Pink Floyd fan, you're all set.
 
2020-08-16 9:06:38 PM  
"Subby's Mom" sounds hot
 
2020-08-16 9:09:15 PM  

Il Douchey: Number of Americans who froze to death in 2019: At least 21 (as of 2/1/19)

Number of Americans who hotted to death in 2019: 6 (according to this woke, global warming stooge columnist)

/But freezing to death doesn't advance the global warming agenda; so health experts, climate scientists, and policymakers are desperately trying to reframe the story in ways that allow them to control the narrative (and, in many cases continue to collect a fat paycheck) by scaring you with fear, uncertainty and doubt.

[Fark user image 244x183]


You accidently dropped a few zeros in the heat deaths.
"In the US, over 600 people succumb to extreme heat every year, outstripping the deaths from hurricanes, floods, or tornadoes in most years."
 
2020-08-16 9:10:45 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-16 9:11:35 PM  

Mole Man: Yall slipping:

[Youtube-video https://www.youtube.com/embed/5k0GDQrK​2jo]


You should probably check your work.
 
2020-08-16 9:12:09 PM  

Il Douchey: Number of Americans who froze to death in 2019: At least 21 (as of 2/1/19)

Number of Americans who hotted to death in 2019: 6 (according to this woke, global warming stooge columnist)

/But freezing to death doesn't advance the global warming agenda; so health experts, climate scientists, and policymakers are desperately trying to reframe the story in ways that allow them to control the narrative (and, in many cases continue to collect a fat paycheck) by scaring you with fear, uncertainty and doubt.

[Fark user image 244x183]


Just because you survived your mom leaving you in a hot car doesn't mean heat related death isn't a thing.
 
2020-08-16 9:14:41 PM  

Bennie Crabtree: Wasilla Hillbilly: How seriously should I take these heatwaves? They better have respectable names at least. "Heatwave Karen"? Gtfo

Well if you leave it up to NASA is it will have a name with at least one apostrophe and twelve vowels like ʻOumuamua so if you're an early Pink Floyd fan, you're all set.


I would evacuate that heatwave for sure. Respect.
 
2020-08-16 9:16:04 PM  
The Reverend Horton Heatwave.
 
2020-08-16 9:17:06 PM  

flemardo: Il Douchey: Number of Americans who froze to death in 2019: At least 21 (as of 2/1/19)

Number of Americans who hotted to death in 2019: 6 (according to this woke, global warming stooge columnist)

/But freezing to death doesn't advance the global warming agenda; so health experts, climate scientists, and policymakers are desperately trying to reframe the story in ways that allow them to control the narrative (and, in many cases continue to collect a fat paycheck) by scaring you with fear, uncertainty and doubt.

[Fark user image 244x183]

You accidently dropped a few zeros in the heat deaths.
"In the US, over 600 people succumb to extreme heat every year, outstripping the deaths from hurricanes, floods, or tornadoes in most years."


Or you just added more data because, you can't refute that more people die of exposure to cold weather.
 
2020-08-16 9:20:13 PM  
BOOGIE NIGHTS...Heatwave
Youtube r8tW1cQtsw0
 
2020-08-16 9:21:02 PM  

mjjt: [Fark user image image 410x395]


Black people will make smarter decisions if we get rid of the gays?

Cool.
 
2020-08-16 9:23:36 PM  

American-Irish eyes: flemardo: Il Douchey: Number of Americans who froze to death in 2019: At least 21 (as of 2/1/19)

Number of Americans who hotted to death in 2019: 6 (according to this woke, global warming stooge columnist)

/But freezing to death doesn't advance the global warming agenda; so health experts, climate scientists, and policymakers are desperately trying to reframe the story in ways that allow them to control the narrative (and, in many cases continue to collect a fat paycheck) by scaring you with fear, uncertainty and doubt.

[Fark user image 244x183]

You accidently dropped a few zeros in the heat deaths.
"In the US, over 600 people succumb to extreme heat every year, outstripping the deaths from hurricanes, floods, or tornadoes in most years."

Or you just added more data because, you can't refute that more people die of exposure to cold weather.


Does your brain hurt, like, all the time?
 
2020-08-16 9:25:43 PM  
Anthropomorphising the hot weather will not make the cargo area of my UPS truck any cooler, nor will it help me when I waste 5 minutes back there looking for a package that ends up on the wrong side of the truck, underneath the 145 pound air conditioner.

I still can't believe people voluntarily move to Florida for the weather. Born and raised here, and I cannot stand the heat and humidity.
 
2020-08-16 9:27:28 PM  

Il Douchey: Number of Americans who froze to death in 2019: At least 21 (as of 2/1/19)

Number of Americans who hotted to death in 2019: 6 (according to this woke, global warming stooge columnist)

/But freezing to death doesn't advance the global warming agenda; so health experts, climate scientists, and policymakers are desperately trying to reframe the story in ways that allow them to control the narrative (and, in many cases continue to collect a fat paycheck) by scaring you with fear, uncertainty and doubt.

[Fark user image image 244x183]


Where in the flying flip and f*** did you get those numbers from? It's closer to about 1,300 people die from cold related problems, and 600 die from heat related problems in the US every year. And I realize you're not bright enough to grasp this, but I'll try anyway. Global warming has exactly jackshiat zero to do with how many heat related deaths are in the US every year.
 
2020-08-16 9:31:50 PM  

Bullitt: [YouTube video: BOOGIE NIGHTS...Heatwave]


Martha & the Vandellas - Heatwave
Youtube XE2fnYpwrng
 
2020-08-16 9:33:23 PM  

Il Douchey: Number of Americans who froze to death in 2019: At least 21 (as of 2/1/19)

Number of Americans who hotted to death in 2019: 6 (according to this woke, global warming stooge columnist)

/But freezing to death doesn't advance the global warming agenda; so health experts, climate scientists, and policymakers are desperately trying to reframe the story in ways that allow them to control the narrative (and, in many cases continue to collect a fat paycheck) by scaring you with fear, uncertainty and doubt.

[Fark user image 244x183]


This is an incredible post
 
2020-08-16 9:36:25 PM  
PSA06 - House Fire
Youtube _tfDb9vq0VU


Weather v Climate is incomprehensible to most people. And adjusting to new extreme weather can be hard. We had what was essentially an inland hurricane that knocked out power and ripped up the midwest.
I don't know anyone who took it that seriously before it hit.
With how much the impact of storms are overstated and how hyped weather is, it's hard to get a sense of how dangerous climate change is.
If we keep having things like this, and we will, the cost will greatly outweigh even the startup cost of going green on everything.
And we better. I was ok only because I prep for bad weather. I can't help the neighborhood as a matter of course.
 
2020-08-16 9:37:30 PM  

New Farkin User Name: Il Douchey:

[Fark user image 244x183]

This is an incredible post


Incredible in the literal sense of not credible.
 
2020-08-16 9:37:33 PM  
I was going to ask why a weather-related article somehow ended up in the PolTab, but now I recognize my naivete.
 
2020-08-16 9:51:00 PM  

mdarius: [YouTube video: PSA06 - House Fire]

Weather v Climate is incomprehensible to most people. And adjusting to new extreme weather can be hard. We had what was essentially an inland hurricane that knocked out power and ripped up the midwest.
I don't know anyone who took it that seriously before it hit.
With how much the impact of storms are overstated and how hyped weather is, it's hard to get a sense of how dangerous climate change is.
If we keep having things like this, and we will, the cost will greatly outweigh even the startup cost of going green on everything.
And we better. I was ok only because I prep for bad weather. I can't help the neighborhood as a matter of course.


Porkchop sandwiches
 
2020-08-16 10:08:17 PM  
Heatwave Raul?
 
2020-08-16 10:11:50 PM  
No.  Hurricanes are named because they cause insane amounts of damage to people and property.  I'm not even sure I like how they are naming winter storms, and there's something of a scientific basis for the comparison there.  Heatwaves?  It's farking hot.  Don't do yardwork.  Hydrate.  A heatwave never collapsed an office building or demolished an entire American city.
 
2020-08-16 10:13:18 PM  

Kellner21: Anthropomorphising the hot weather will not make the cargo area of my UPS truck any cooler


I see it eventually leading to people identifying as weather and climate patterns/progressions and the subsequent sexualization of said patterns.
 
2020-08-16 10:20:27 PM  
I'm fine with naming hurricanes because hurricanes can literally level (and/or flood) entire cities and cause billions of dollars in damages.

Naming winter storms... was idiotic.

Naming heat waves, more idiotic.

If it's truly historic, perhaps, so we don't have to refer to them like '2012 North American March Heat Wave', maybe.  But, would you remember that or if it was 'Heat Wave Hades'?  You'd have to look up Hades to go 'Oh, it was THAT heat wave'.  It'd accomplish nothing.
 
2020-08-16 10:34:33 PM  

mjjt: What are they going to call the plagues?


Don Jr
Eric
Ivanka
Tiffany
and 'The Expert'
 
2020-08-16 11:47:21 PM  

Nana's Vibrator: Haha.  Hardly nobody died from the heatwaves, thanks to Donald Trump.


You still have the best name on this whole farked up site.
 
2020-08-17 12:14:51 AM  

Il Douchey: Number of Americans who froze to death in 2019: At least 21 (as of 2/1/19)

Number of Americans who hotted to death in 2019: 6 (according to this woke, global warming stooge columnist)


Sweet farking Christ, you don't have to always be an asshole, you know.
 
Displayed 50 of 52 comments


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all


View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking





On Twitter



  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.